Hello, Mom!
How are you, son?
I am good.
How are your studies going?
It's going well.
The classes have begun.
Why are you disturbing his routine?
Let him sleep.
You can call him all day. But you choose to call him at night!
Tell me, son...
are you happy?
Yes, Mom.
Why do you always ask me this question?
Okay.
I'll hang up.
Okay.
-Goodnight. -Goodnight.
Are you revising coordinates in there?
Just two more minutes, bro.
Did it fall?
I had told you, right?
Jeetu Bhaiya and Physics can never be wrong.
Bhaiya!
Once more!
How many times did you pay the fees?
What if I say, "once more"?
Look at him! He's yawning in the class.
Am I that boring?
I stole someone's wheel at 4:30 a.m.
He may show up anytime.
And this chap is yawning in here.
Sorry, sir.
-I couldn't sleep all night, so-- -What did you just say?
-I couldn't sleep all night-- -No. No. Before that?
Sorry, sir?
Sir!
Did everyone hear that?
Sir!
Jeetu Bhaiya is no longer a brother.
What am I now?
-Sir! -Sir!
Mr. Batla and Mr. Rao aren't the only "sirs" in this institute!
Jeetu Bhaiya is now a...
-Sir! -Sir!
You definitely deserve a prize.
-Come here. -Go!
-Come. -Well done!
The credit for my success goes to my mother...
Mrs. Sumitra Devi...
Get lost!
Go and wash your face. Go!
He wants to take my hard-earned money.
-You are so dramatic, Bhaiya. -Why shouldn't I be?
After all, I was the Governor of Dramatics Society at IIT Kharagpur!
Let's resume.
-A beautiful girl. -Yes, sir.
Yes! Now you're all awake, at the mention of a beautiful girl.
-Are the patties fresh? -Of course!
Give me one.
You are giving up food for these patties?
That's not food. It's bullshit!
It's just been a week and you've started cussing out!
What?
Bullshit is not a cussword.
It's a body product.
Fertilizer.
Mr. Agarwal uses it in the classroom as well.
Give me the pickle.
Carry on.
Mr. Uday, rather than learning hard work, discipline and punctuality,
you choose to learn cusswords from Mr. Agarwal.
Stop munching on these patties all the time.
You'll grow weak if you skip your meals.
If you grow weak you'll fall ill.
And the students who fall ill within the first week...
are taken back home by their parents.
And they never make it to IIT.
Meena, I will fall ill even if I eat this food.
This is so oily.
-Rubbish! -Hey!
Speak softly.
If Chandru hears it, he'll mix all the gourds for dinner,
including bitter gourd.
Are you still drinking Bisleri?
Meena. That's not Bisleri, it's Aquafina.
Same difference!
Why are you wasting money?
Drink this.
The mess does not make the water.
My thirst never gets quenched by this water.
It's weird and salty.
-The Chambal water is hard! -...is hard!
I know.
I've been hearing this for the past week.
Look, if you don't eat well you won't be able to concentrate.
Then you won't be able to study for long.
You are facing many problems anyway.
Why are you inviting a new one?
Look, if you drink more of this you will spend more money...
if you drink less you will be constipated.
I already am.
You couldn't empty your bowels today as well?
Why are we having this conversation at the dining table?
Wonderful!
When you called this delicious food a body product,
was that a good conversation to have?
You couldn't empty your bowels?
Are you going to empty it for him?
Uday!
Let's get some tea.
Shivangi!
Please don't bite me!
Lusty scoundrel!
Meena!
Let's get some tea.
It isn't 5:30 p.m. yet.
Have you finished the sheet?
Yes, I've completed 35 problems.
You've completed 35 problems?
That's quick. I'm just done with 30.
Why don't you complete it? You'll be done by 5:30 p.m.
How do you guys sit for so long?
I lose my patience.
Don't do this!
You didn't finish your homework yesterday!
If you don't do it today as well, it will pile up.
I'm not in the mood.
Try to read the theory. Utilize your time.
I'm not in the mood.
This is what I've been trying to tell you!
You know what...
read Flamingo for now.
It's a light read and will prepare you for the test as well.
Take it!
It has stories.
A monkey is pulling down an object through a pulley.
Another monkey is pulling the first monkey's tail.
Since it is pulling his tail it is bound to create tension.
So 2t is equal to the object's...
Vaibhav!
You're going downhill!
You need the guidance of a wise man!
-Who? -A psychiatrist.
Psychiatrist?
Counselor?
Buzz off!
Is this a mental problem?
Am I depressed?
Do I have anxiety? Am I suicidal?
Do you think I need a counselor because I've lost my mind?
Anyway...
half of the counselors here are frauds.
I don't need anybody.
You need Alprazolam, which is good for your sleep
and can restore the balance of serotonin and dopamine in your body.
And Lactulose for your constipation problems.
Pay the fees outside.
You do know that you are not a doctor, right?
Just because I'm wearing a coat instead of an apron
and my handwriting is good, doesn't mean I'm not a doctor!
Because you don't have a license.
Why are you wearing this lab coat?
Don't dress for the job you have.
Dress for the job you want.
Vaibhav...
I know what you need.
IT'S MY LAST ATTEMPT PLEASE HELP
Radha Krishna temple.
All your prayers will be answered here.
Take this.
Write it cleanly with a pure heart.
This is mathematically impossible, Meena.
There aren't as many seats in IIT as the number of prayers here.
What is this, Meena?
Why did you bring us here?
"Help me."
Are you crazy?
He needed someone!
But not just anybody.
A loved one.
Someone who could empathize.
Someone who has faced this himself.
He told me about you.
And I brought him here.
I did the right thing, right?
Absolutely.
You certainly are wise.
Of course, he is from Maheshwari.
Piyush.
Please tell me how you managed it, bro.
My food, drink, poop and sleep, everything is out of order.
How did you get my address?
From your parents!
Because you weren't answering my calls.
Smart, right?
Again, my idea.
Very nice.
I won't take much of your time.
I understand the pressure from Maheshwari.
Just share a coping mechanism with me.
I am not able to handle it.
A friend in need is a friend indeed, right?
Isn't that right, brother?
You did the right thing by coming here?
I know, right?
Thank you.
You did the right thing...
because I can't handle it either!
Mr. Piyush is feeling constipated as well?
This is something else, Meena.
What's wrong, bro?
I am not in Maheshwari.
I've been taking individual lessons for the past six months.
I was right, Meena!
Didn't I tell you,
what is a Maheshwari student doing in Talwandi instead of Vigyan Nagar.
I don't understand.
What are you saying?
Dad got me enrolled using his contacts!
But when the batch was shuffled after the first test,
I ended up in the last batch!
The next time I was the last student in last batch as well.
I had to leave Maheshwari and opt for individual coaching.
Okay.
That's the reason you didn't return my calls.
-I'm sorry, brother. -Get lost!
How could I tell you?
Dad had bragged about it all over Itarsi
that I am in Maheshwari.
Yes.
He does brag a lot.
He told everyone in Itarsi that I didn't get into Maheshwari.
Everyone in Itarsi feels that I will surely get into IIT.
-Yes. All of us feel that way. -Yes.
I was baffled when I learned about his success!
I hope your family knows.
-No, buddy. -What?
Last time when I went home for Diwali,
I had planned on telling the truth and end this but--
But?
For the first time in my life Neha called me.
Neha Purohit?
Yes. You know her younger sister?
-Shilpa? -Yes.
She wanted to get into IIT herself and needed tips from me.
So, they came to my place.
Both Neha and Shilpa?
-Yes. -With their mom!
-Aunt Disha? -Yes.
I got a lot of recognition for the first time in my life!
How could I just let it go?
Right.
Also, do you know, during the conversation
Aunt asked about my date and time of birth.
I am preparing for IIT as well.
I was a better student than you in school.
She never came to me for tips.
You are studying in Prodigy.
Never mind!
Please tell me what I should do!
You...
should see a counselor.
Yes, Mom?
What were you doing?
Well... I was studying.
But an idle woman disturbed me.
How could she do that?
Tell your landlady that when you are studying...
I got it.
I'll hang up. Please study well.
And listen...
are you happy?
Yes, Mom. I am happy.
Until the time I tell you that I'm sad
please assume that I am happy.
Okay, good night.
Good night.
What do you mean?
"I didn't attempt the problem because I didn't understand it."
Always look for hints.
There are many in there.
Where?
The first hint is that you have a problem.
If the maker has given you a problem,
it must be well within your capability to solve it.
The second hint is velocity.
See.
Can you see it?
It can be used for two things.
Energy or momentum.
Now you have to decide which gamble to take.
If it still doesn't make sense, keep looking for hints.
Is the word friction visible?
Yes.
It means that energy cannot be used.
What does that leave? Conservation of momentum.
Initial is equal to...
final.
Am I right, brother?
-Yes, sir. -Yes, sir.
Just equate initial to final.
Tick the answer and move on.
At some point in the future while laughing, singing
or in the toilet you might realize
why was the momentum conserved.
Okay?
Even if you don't understand the question, jostle with it.
What do you do?
-Jostle with it. -Jostle with it.
Yes.
Once you have learned to jostle with questions and twirl the pen
you are already half an IITian.
Come on!
Next!
Hello, bro.
Didn't you do the rest?
Sir, I've only solved 52 questions.
Okay. You've completed 52. Very good!
It's me who hates the environment.
I've made a 150-page worksheet just to waste paper, right?
Sir, It's not that I can't crack the problems...
but I am unable to focus for a long duration.
I don't feel happy.
Is this the problem or there's more to it?
Bhaiya, he doesn't even eat well.
He survives on instant noodles and patties.
He still drinks mineral water and doesn't sleep at all.
Why, brother?
Yes, Bhaiya.
You came late, right?
He missed the orientation.
He does not know the two important concepts of living in Kota.
Tell him, Meenal.
What are they?
Firstly, Jeetu Bhaiya is not just our physics faculty.
He is our "Agony Aunt".
He solves all kinds of problems.
Academic, non-academic, personal, financial or romantic.
Even if your landlord has kicked you out of the house at midnight,
or if you've argued with the mess cook
or if a policeman has caught you reading obscene literature,
Jeetu Bhaiya solves everything.
Just call him immediately and Jeetu Bhaiya solves all the problems.
And...
the second?
You forgot the second?
Yes.
Every child is special.
That is utter nonsense.
You are not some unique personality.
Thousands of students face the same problem every year!
Before preparing for IIT at Kota, one must prepare themselves to live in Kota.
And there are simple ways to do it.
If you encounter problems...
-Jostle with them! -Jostle with them!
...jostle with them.
Even if you don't like the water, just drink it.
Even if you don't like the mess food, just eat it.
Even if you are unable to focus for a long duration, just sit.
Challenge yourself. I will sit!
I won't get up at all.
I will solve problems. I will read theories.
I will watch Unacademy's lessons.
I will go through old papers.
I will sleep, I will die but I won't get up.
So, what have you done?
You have turned your problems into a dare.
And a dare is directly connected to ego.
Ego has many disadvantages but it has one advantage as well.
Things seem to be doable.
And you don't have to do this drama for long.
How many days?
-Twenty-one days! -Twenty-one days!
You can form or give up any habit in 21 days.
I had a smoking problem.
Two packs in a day.
I quit it.
I quit it for a day and I bragged about it at home,
to my girlfriend, faculty, driver and the driver's wife.
I gave 2000 rupees to the vendor
to not give me cigarettes to smoke.
If you brag about it to the world, the world won't let you smoke.
I felt a little urge in the beginning and then some more.
By the time 21 days had passed the urge was zero.
That's what you have to do.
Say something, brother.
Yes, Bhaiya.
Uday is a idiot anyway...
but Meena, you knew this was happening to your friend, right?
Why didn't you tell him?
Brother, I...
You too, Brutus.
You too.
Did you notice?
He called me Brutus, Brutus Meena.
What? Don't you have a sense of humor?
I might look sly but not at heart.
Sure, I'm a member of the Bihar Tigers.
I have the responsibility of the entire city on these shoulders.
But Uday Gupta never ignores his sidekicks.
Because your brother is the king of the streets.
I have bought the annual subscription for Unacademy plus...
-What? -for you.
Go. Attend as many live lectures as you wish.
And always remember, your brother is Caesar, not Brutus.
This man gets up at 3:00 p.m.
But you shouldn't get up. Go study.
What are you looking at? Go study.
One cannot hate what one does not see.
Don't look at the mess food at all.
Pick up the bread without a fuss.
Dip it in anything and just chew.
Sometimes you may be tempted to look down...
but there lies your defeat.
It tastes even better today.
Don't drink water at room temperature.
Drink cold water from the fridge.
People savor cheap beer if it's chilled.
Salt water is easy to drink!
Bottoms up.
Here "x" is the distance of the block from the wall.
And we have to find the velocity as a function of "x."
Choose the correct option.
C!
When did you get here?
I came here to check on you.
Good! Good!
If you have selected option C, your answer is correct.
Now I'll give you the solution for this question.
Yes, I had my meal.
I am healthy and I am happy!
Mom, why do you always ask me this question every day?
Okay.
You can do it, bro.
Vaibhav.
Is it working?
Lentil soup, veggies and breads have to be prepared...
so there is always a chance of a mistake.
And everything that can go wrong in a mess, will go wrong!
That's why one should prefer eating what they don't make.
Things like salad, pickle, papad and yogurt.
That's your three-course meal.
Many people have shit themselves because of me!
You're no different.
Two puffs.
Just two puffs.
You will experience streamline motion.
No friction.
Nonsense.
Take it. This is the truth.
Get lost!
Bloody addict!
Students, today we shall solve a problem on vertical circular motion.
Let me first explain the problem.
Vaibhav!
Auntie!
She was walking down the stairs and she fell.
There's frothing at her mouth.
Hello! Ambulance?
Come to Lal Burj quickly. It's an emergency.
What? Froth? Where?
You got up?
For that two-bit woman?
You just want an excuse.
Damn you!
You're going to embarrass us in front of Jeetu Bhaiya.
Give me my 100 rupees for the bet.
Hey, engineer!
Nature has done half the job.
Water contains salt.
Just add sugar and lemon to it.
Lemonade is ready.
This small tip saves the lives of ten million children every year.
It's great!
Right?
Go and prepare two glasses now.
Three.
Mom, Uday's girlfriend doesn't call him as many times as you're calling me.
Go! Go! Come on!
Well done, bro! Well done!
You are under the oath of IIT.
One can't follow ODIs, how will one follow test cricket?
The T-20 format has been created for Kota students.
IPL is the future.
If wish they would let Yuvraj play.
That's wrong.
You are correct, bro. It's all politics.
Bro, Yuvi can and Yuvi will.
That's right, bro. Yuvraj will return.
You can quote me on that.
You?
Yes.
He will return.
Students, today we shall solve a problem on impulse momentum theorem.
In it we shall learn to calculate impulse.
Wow! There was no sound today.
Meena! This is really inappropriate.
-I'm happy for you, buddy. -Buzz off!
Students, we will solve a problem on friction today.
As you can see in the picture there are two blocks.
Both the blocks are on a wedge
and both are connected with the help of a string
which passes through the pulley. The mass of one block is "s" and...
Shall we?
It is 6:30 p.m. already!
Let's go.
I had taught you those questions in the class, right?
But I'm glad today you had solved the DPP as well as the sheets!
It means that this chap has increased his focus!
Yes, sir.
Is food and water sorted?
Yes, Bhaiya.
Are you able to shit properly?
Come on, Bhaiya!
Come on. Don't be embarrassed!
I am your "Agony Aunt".
And we have a long journey together.
Everyone has these problems.
I have them as well.
Have you been doing Physical Chemistry?
Give me one.
A cigarette?
Yes.
Cigarette?
If you don't have the urge and the situation is under control...
then you are allowed to cheat.
Cheating is fine...
as long as it doesn't become a habit.
-What's wrong? -Auto!
Let's rush to Vigyan Nagar.
-Let's go, sir. -Bhaiya!
-I'll see you later.
What happened?
Nature's call?
Yes.
Non-simple ionic materials...
Meena!
Come on.
It's just 5:00 p.m.
Let's go! Come!
Stop this!
Let's go!
I just need to read one more paragraph.
What will you gain by reading one paragraph?
Hey!
Jeetu Bhaiya said...
"Cheating is fine...
as long as it doesn't become a habit."
The number you are trying to call is busy.
Please try later.
He's not answering my call.
He's definitely happy.