[intense woodwind music playing]
Fuck yeah.
Oh, Yeah, yeah, yeah, like that.
That's it. Waddle for me, baby.
-Waddle. Waddle, baby. -Yeah? What if I waddle like this?
[man moans]
Fuck yeah. Yeah, waddle for me, baby.
Yeah, keep doing that. Yeah, go over there.
Waddle over there. Yeah, like that.
-Oh, yeah. Like that, baby. -Ooh.
Oh. Careful. There are orcas over there.
-Orcas? -Yeah, they wanna eat you.
-They wanna eat me? -[moans]
I haven't seen orcas since last winter.
Oh, fuck, last winter was so fucking hot.
-So hot. -Yeah.
Everything was melting and--
Oh, no! The ice! It's breaking!
Careful. If you fall in, they're gonna fucking eat you.
-Oh, it's cracking! Oh! -Careful!
Global warming is gonna kill us all!
[screaming]
Yeah! Yeah!
Too real?
[sighs]
Yeah, the global warming thing's a bit of a boner-killer.
-Um… -Sure. Yeah.
Let's just go back to the waddling, maybe?
-Yeah, sure. -Start with that. Yeah. And…
You should search for your lost penguin egg.
-Got it. -Okay.
Really search for it, though. Like, just really look for it.
Love it. Giving it stakes.
[exhales]
[Mira] Oh, I knew it.
I knew it. That guy looked me in my face and told me the reason
that he was hiking my rent was because he wasn't gonna sell.
[MJP] Just because he's selling doesn't mean there's a buyer yet.
I'm the last house left in the Dungeon District.
This isn't about real estate, John Paul. The business is changing.
So, what do you wanna do, mistress?
What can I do?
You know I can't afford to take on any more.
Well, your revenues are up from last year.
You should be able to figure out something.
After everything I've been through.
The raids.
I finally stabilize,
and now I gotta use all my money to move my dungeon?
You run the best house in this city.
You'll make it back.
-Will I? -Yeah.
With all these "fuck you, pay me" Internet dommes out there?
All they need is an iPhone and a Twitter account,
and, no shade, get your money,
but that… is not how I work.
Maybe a space just for yourself, then. Like your first place.
Hmm.
God, I miss that place.
Do you remember how, when the curtains were open,
you could see that huge Jesus in the church across the street?
And I'm on the Saint Andrew's Cross,
and there's Christ looking at me.
Oh, the ecstasy.
Yeah.
My basement tenant is moving out of my townhouse in May.
Yeah, would Keith go for that
with the kids?
I mean, it'd be a conversation, sure.
I don't know. Maybe we'd kill each other, both working from home.
[MJP] Mm-hmm.
But the kids are old enough now.
And they don't have to know everything.
At least they can know something.
Being kinky is part of who you are, John Paul.
It's something that I finally accepted about myself, but…
Ugh…
You've got nothing to be ashamed of, pet.
Thank you, mistress.
I wish that my family could see me the way you do.
[chuckles]
Where is it? Where did it go?
Did I misplace it?
Where is it?
Where is my lost penguin egg?
Where's your egg, huh? Where's your egg?
-Is it over here? -Yeah.
-Could it be over there, maybe? -Yeah.
[door opening]
-Pete. -May? What are you doing here?
What are you doing?
Mira said no clients in the dungeon
until the course is finished.
-Hi, Joe. -Mistress.
Well, since I've been kicked out and uninvited to multiple of her classes,
I've taken it upon myself to set out on my own.
So, if you'll excuse me, I didn't interrupt your session,
so please, don't interrupt mine.
Okay, okay, okay.
-But, Pete, I'm serious-- -It's "Carter."
Sorry, Carter.
-Thank you. -Actually, I'm gonna head out.
What? No. Don't go.
We haven't even gotten to the part with the cove and the sea lions yet.
Yeah, uh, Master Carter, I'm done.
Sorry, I didn't hear a word you just said.
You are so hot.
Uh, I'm sorry. I was gonna say something earlier, but, um…
I… I met a girl.
And she's got a lot of similar interests as me,
and she's part of a community of people
that live their furry lives out and proud, so…
What? But you're, like, my only client.
I'll never forget your waddle.
Damn.
I never realized how hot he was.
So hot, I'm, like, shaking.
Oh, God.
Wait. What were we even talking about?
Oh, right. I was mad at you.
What? No, I'm mad at you.
Oh, Even Stevens, then.
No, Pete. I'm seriously mad at you.
Why can't my mad be "seriously mad"?
You are compromising my relationship
to this entire dungeon by going behind my back like this.
"You," "your."
Not "we," not "our."
Mistress Mira thinks that we should split up for a little bit.
-Don't blame this on Mira. -Mistress Mira.
Okay, Mistress May.
If you don't want me to be here, I wont be.
I think I have a solution for your studio.
-Really? -Mm-hmm.
You're gonna take to the streets for me?
Start a GoFundMe? [chuckles]
[MJD] Why don't I buy you a condo?
Near the trains, in a building where you can do your business peacefully.
No, no, no, John Paul, that's too much.
With all due respect, mistress,
you've taken care of so many people.
I want to make sure you're taken care of.
I, uh…
I…
What about the other dommes? You know, those girls rely on me.
[MJD] Mistress,
this is about you.
Please, Mistress.
May your JP do this for you?
Sorry, I'm late.
You're just in time.
-Oh, let me help. -They got it.
-Ow! Tiff. -Sorry.
I… I was just trying to help.
-He's in a terrible mood. -Well, I got hit by a car, Gina.
And whose fault is that, Doug?
Guy who invented cars. Can someone just wheel me out of here?
Last I checked, just your leg was broken.
-Oh, um, I got it. -Nah. I can do it myself.
Thanks. Fuck, thanks.
You got this, Douglas.
Mr. Independent.
-What is going on with him? -He just heard us talking the other night.
-He'll get over it. -God, I was so high. What did we say?
I said I never loved him, and you said you didn't know if you could.
Shit.
But we also called him a great lay,
so he should really take all the love stuff on the chin.
I don't have insurance,
but the last time I checked, this paid for things just fine.
Gina, I'm so sorry, but would you mind taking Doug to my apartment?
It'll be easier. Just no roommate or stairs or anything. Please.
-Sure thing. -[Doug] Oh, shit.
Come on, Douglas.
No.
No, Gina. I don't need help from you. Okay? I don't need help from anybody.
Thank you. You hear that, Tiff?
Tiff? Tiff?
-[Portia] Stripping money is good money. -Portia.
-Tiff. -What's going on?
Nurse Ratched over here won't accept my boyfriend's gay go-go boy money
for my medical emergency, which is elitist,
discriminatory, and, in a roundabout way, homophobic.
Okay, but what happened?
Other than the potential baby inside of me?
In the shower this morning, I…
saw bleeding.
Okay. Shit. Um…
Probably gonna get in trouble for this, but…
here you go.
No. No. [laughing] No.
Oh…
You know, it's not every day you meet your boyfriend's father
as he tells him you're his girlfriend.
Yeah, this is good.
This is right.
Everything else can go back in the closet, thanks.
Oh, penguin man for dry cleaner's, master?
I, uh, I don't think I'm gonna need that anymore.
Last time there was a nasty stain.
Rolph…
I know you didn't really have a choice,
seeing as how Mistress May banished you to work for me
due to your professing your love for her, but…
do you think I'm good at this?
At being a dom?
And don't tell me what I wanna hear just because I own you.
Permission to speak honestly.
Am I a good master?
-No. -No?
I miss my mistress.
She is special.
She has gift.
And what do I have?
Insecurity masked by humor.
[scoffs]
Wow. Okay.
Hmm.
Permission to speak honestly over.
How do I look? Don't answer that.
But do. How do I look?
Handsome.
But seriously, I've taken pants off before.
-This is not about your butt. -[Tiff] Doug? Gina?
-It's about your leg. -I can do it by myself, Gina.
Uh, hi.
Oh…
Can you guys please talk somewhere else
about how much you hate me? I'm trying to take a shit.
He's not my problem anymore.
Thank you for everything that you've done.
You too.
Bye, Douglas.
-[grunts] -I'm leaving you again.
[Doug] Oh.
Well, that was in poor taste, Virginia.
[Tiff] Um…
I've never seen you angry before.
Yeah? Well, here it is. Happy?
Look, I'm sorry if what you thought I said the other night was hurtful.
I didn't mean it like that.
Here, let me help you. Okay.
-Ow! Tiff! -Shit! Sorry!
Be careful. I'm not one of your clients.
-What? Don't say that. -Oh, Jesus.
"Don't say that. Don't ask me about work.
Definitely don't tell me about your feelings."
Why are you so angry at me?
I'm not Pete or Rolph, okay?
I'm not someone you can just order around.
I don't tell you what to do.
You go to strange places,
do God knows what with God knows who,
and I'm not allowed to say a fucking word.
-I'm not even allowed to ask. -I knew it. You judge me.
-Don't put words in my mouth. -Just say it.
-You're doing it right now. -Go on, say it.
I am not judging you. You're… always judging yourself.
You know what?
Take your shit and leave, literally.
I already did.
Then just fucking go, Doug!
[door slams]
[breathing deeply]
[Pete, faintly] Josh. Josh. Josh?
Josh.
[elevator dings]
[Josh] Whoo, I'm so nervous.
I've been sweating. Am I sweating?
-No, you're fine, baby. -You can't do that here.
Okay.
I guess we'll touch in 20 minutes.
-Don't make jokes. -It's a coping mechanism.
This is the start of a whole new chapter. Hmm?
Yeah, my dad's a fucking ass, though.
I mean, you'll see. He's a cagey fucking asshole.
Hey.
You don't have to do this.
Fuck it.
[Pete] Josh! Josh. What--?
Josh!
Why are you running?
-Josh! -[Olga] Morning, Josh.
[Pete] I don't have my inhaler.
[Olga] Your father's getting ready for a meeting!
[Josh] Everybody get the fuck out, please.
-Thank you! -[Pete] Hi. How are you?
[Josh] Dad, we need to talk.
[bright music playing] talk.