1 00:00:01,460 --> 00:00:03,002 (modem beeping) ADULT SHELDON: In the early days 2 00:00:03,044 --> 00:00:05,422 of the Internet, you couldn't stream movies 3 00:00:05,464 --> 00:00:08,258 or summon Thai food to your doorstep. 4 00:00:08,300 --> 00:00:11,637 But... if you were interested in text-based news 5 00:00:11,679 --> 00:00:13,597 about upcoming physics lectures, 6 00:00:13,639 --> 00:00:15,975 it was a great time to be alive. 7 00:00:16,015 --> 00:00:17,685 Holy moly. 8 00:00:21,856 --> 00:00:23,148 Dad. 9 00:00:24,023 --> 00:00:25,024 Dad! 10 00:00:25,066 --> 00:00:26,109 I'm in the shower! 11 00:00:26,151 --> 00:00:27,736 It's an emergency. 12 00:00:27,778 --> 00:00:30,155 Fine! Come in. 13 00:00:31,782 --> 00:00:32,950 Dad? 14 00:00:32,992 --> 00:00:34,910 I thought you had to use the bathroom. 15 00:00:34,952 --> 00:00:36,662 At 7:23 in the morning? 16 00:00:36,704 --> 00:00:39,456 Why do I print out schedules if you're not going to read them? 17 00:00:39,498 --> 00:00:40,916 Tell me what you want. 18 00:00:40,958 --> 00:00:42,167 What are we doing next weekend? 19 00:00:42,209 --> 00:00:44,294 This ain't sounding like an emergency. 20 00:00:44,336 --> 00:00:47,006 It is. Stephen Hawking is giving a lecture, 21 00:00:47,046 --> 00:00:48,799 and I really need to go. 22 00:00:48,841 --> 00:00:51,969 Can we talk about this when I'm out of the shower? 23 00:00:52,011 --> 00:00:54,013 Pick up the pace. According to the schedule 24 00:00:54,053 --> 00:00:57,683 that you don't read, I'm due in there in six minutes. 25 00:00:58,976 --> 00:01:01,896 ♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪ 26 00:01:01,937 --> 00:01:04,690 ♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪ 27 00:01:04,732 --> 00:01:07,317 ♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪ 28 00:01:07,359 --> 00:01:09,570 ♪ I am a mighty little man ♪ 29 00:01:09,611 --> 00:01:14,115 ♪ I am a mighty little man. ♪ 30 00:01:16,869 --> 00:01:17,745 So can we go? 31 00:01:17,786 --> 00:01:19,747 (sighs) I don't know. 32 00:01:19,788 --> 00:01:21,122 Go take a shower. 33 00:01:21,164 --> 00:01:23,000 I still have two minutes and 15 seconds. 34 00:01:23,042 --> 00:01:24,418 Let's nail this down. 35 00:01:25,544 --> 00:01:27,629 Where's the lecture? 36 00:01:27,671 --> 00:01:29,339 And if the answer's Dallas, we're not going. 37 00:01:29,381 --> 00:01:31,675 Good news: it's not Dallas. Where? 38 00:01:31,717 --> 00:01:33,301 Pasadena, California. 39 00:01:33,343 --> 00:01:34,595 (chuckles): California? 40 00:01:34,636 --> 00:01:36,304 That's a lot further than Dallas. 41 00:01:36,346 --> 00:01:38,599 1,232 miles further as the crow flies. 42 00:01:38,640 --> 00:01:41,643 But kudos to you for being up on your geography. 43 00:01:42,770 --> 00:01:44,396 There's no way we're going to California. 44 00:01:44,438 --> 00:01:46,273 If Stephen Hawking can make it there in a wheelchair, 45 00:01:46,314 --> 00:01:47,733 I'm sure we can manage. 46 00:01:47,775 --> 00:01:50,027 (sighs): Sheldon, airplane tickets are expensive. 47 00:01:50,069 --> 00:01:52,696 Hotels are expensive. We can't afford it. 48 00:01:52,738 --> 00:01:54,489 But his health is fragile. 49 00:01:54,531 --> 00:01:57,868 This might be my only chance to ever see him in person. 50 00:01:58,869 --> 00:02:01,204 I'm sorry, buddy. 51 00:02:01,246 --> 00:02:03,206 I would like to discuss this further, 52 00:02:03,248 --> 00:02:05,000 but I only have... 53 00:02:05,042 --> 00:02:09,046 22 seconds to be in the shower, and buttons slow me down. 54 00:02:12,549 --> 00:02:15,761 This is the moment we lost that game. 55 00:02:15,803 --> 00:02:19,264 But one bad play doesn't mean you give up. 56 00:02:19,306 --> 00:02:21,182 We had plenty of time to turn it around, 57 00:02:21,224 --> 00:02:23,102 but y'all decided it was over. 58 00:02:23,143 --> 00:02:26,814 I don't want to ever see that happen again. 59 00:02:26,855 --> 00:02:28,857 Next time something seems out of your reach, 60 00:02:28,899 --> 00:02:30,818 you do not quit. 61 00:02:30,859 --> 00:02:32,903 You just dig deeper. 62 00:02:32,945 --> 00:02:34,822 Does that mean if I find an affordable flight 63 00:02:34,863 --> 00:02:36,698 to California, we can go? 64 00:02:36,740 --> 00:02:38,492 (sighs) 65 00:02:38,533 --> 00:02:40,368 (door opens) 66 00:02:42,412 --> 00:02:44,581 Hi. Can I help you? 67 00:02:44,623 --> 00:02:46,917 I'm trying to find the cheapest flight to California 68 00:02:46,959 --> 00:02:48,752 for me and my father. Okay. 69 00:02:48,794 --> 00:02:50,545 Well, have a seat. 70 00:02:50,587 --> 00:02:52,547 You lookin' to go to Disneyland? 71 00:02:52,589 --> 00:02:54,299 The only ride I'm interested in is 72 00:02:54,341 --> 00:02:57,719 the intellectual roller coaster of Stephen Hawking's mind. 73 00:02:58,637 --> 00:03:00,555 And where is that located? 74 00:03:00,597 --> 00:03:02,390 Well... Stephen Hawking's head. 75 00:03:02,432 --> 00:03:04,768 But that will be at Caltech in Pasadena. 76 00:03:04,810 --> 00:03:05,978 Got it. 77 00:03:06,020 --> 00:03:08,313 And, uh, when were you looking to fly? 78 00:03:08,355 --> 00:03:09,314 Next weekend. 79 00:03:09,356 --> 00:03:10,816 Oh, wow, that's pretty soon. 80 00:03:10,858 --> 00:03:12,693 Traveling last-minute can be pricey. 81 00:03:12,734 --> 00:03:14,736 Are there any discounts available? 82 00:03:14,778 --> 00:03:16,989 Are you a member of any frequent-flier programs? 83 00:03:17,031 --> 00:03:18,866 No. I've never flown before. 84 00:03:18,907 --> 00:03:21,326 Well, ways to keep the cost down are: 85 00:03:21,368 --> 00:03:23,704 flying on weekdays, multiple layovers, or-- 86 00:03:23,745 --> 00:03:25,789 this probably doesn't apply, but-- 87 00:03:25,831 --> 00:03:27,041 airlines offer special fares 88 00:03:27,082 --> 00:03:29,043 if there's been a death in the family. 89 00:03:29,084 --> 00:03:31,753 Interesting. May I use your phone? 90 00:03:31,795 --> 00:03:33,463 (phone rings) 91 00:03:34,339 --> 00:03:35,423 Hello? 92 00:03:35,465 --> 00:03:36,967 What else you got? 93 00:03:37,009 --> 00:03:38,343 Hello? 94 00:03:38,385 --> 00:03:39,636 See ya. 95 00:03:39,678 --> 00:03:41,972 Where you going? Out with Jana. 96 00:03:42,014 --> 00:03:44,432 You've been spending a lot of time with her lately. 97 00:03:44,474 --> 00:03:46,226 Is she your girlfriend? 98 00:03:46,267 --> 00:03:47,936 Dad, can you make her stop? 99 00:03:47,978 --> 00:03:50,397 Yeah, I could but I won't. Also, I can't. 100 00:03:50,438 --> 00:03:52,774 I just want to know what's going on in your life. 101 00:03:52,816 --> 00:03:54,902 And if this girl is someone special to you, 102 00:03:54,943 --> 00:03:56,444 then she's special to me. 103 00:03:56,486 --> 00:03:57,696 Come on. 104 00:03:57,738 --> 00:03:58,906 Mary, enough. What? 105 00:03:58,947 --> 00:04:00,866 I want to know. Bye. 106 00:04:00,908 --> 00:04:02,450 If it helps, I don't care. 107 00:04:02,492 --> 00:04:04,285 It does. Thank you. 108 00:04:05,244 --> 00:04:06,955 Why doesn't he tell me anything? 109 00:04:06,997 --> 00:04:09,624 When you were a teenager, did you tell your parents stuff? 110 00:04:09,666 --> 00:04:10,918 Well, no. 111 00:04:10,959 --> 00:04:12,502 Then why do you expect him to? 112 00:04:12,544 --> 00:04:14,462 'Cause I'm a cool, fun mom. 113 00:04:14,504 --> 00:04:15,797 (snickers) 114 00:04:16,548 --> 00:04:17,966 (clears throat softly) 115 00:04:18,008 --> 00:04:20,094 Dad, good news. Airline tickets to California 116 00:04:20,135 --> 00:04:22,179 are more affordable than you think. 117 00:04:22,221 --> 00:04:23,430 Sheldon, we're not going. 118 00:04:23,471 --> 00:04:24,932 What's all this about? 119 00:04:24,973 --> 00:04:27,267 Stephen Hawking is giving a lecture at Caltech. 120 00:04:27,308 --> 00:04:29,103 If we leave on Wednesday and are willing to make four layovers, 121 00:04:29,144 --> 00:04:31,730 in Boise, Denver, Albuquerque and Fargo, 122 00:04:31,772 --> 00:04:34,357 we can get there for only $95 each. 123 00:04:34,399 --> 00:04:37,111 I have a job-- I can't just leave in the middle of the week. 124 00:04:37,152 --> 00:04:39,071 W-Well, then what about Mom? 125 00:04:39,113 --> 00:04:42,074 Sorry, Shelly, we're not in a position to do this. 126 00:04:42,116 --> 00:04:43,700 But Stephen Hawking's my hero. 127 00:04:43,742 --> 00:04:46,536 Imagine if you got a chance to see Jesus or... 128 00:04:46,578 --> 00:04:49,206 Dad got to meet the man who invented beer. 129 00:04:50,540 --> 00:04:52,000 (sighs) 130 00:04:54,962 --> 00:04:56,838 Someone's Underoos are in a knot. 131 00:04:56,880 --> 00:04:59,216 My Underoos are fitting just fine, thank you. 132 00:04:59,258 --> 00:05:01,260 Then why is there a stick up your butt? 133 00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:03,344 Stop making inquiries about my bottom. 134 00:05:03,386 --> 00:05:04,679 But I enjoy it. 135 00:05:04,721 --> 00:05:06,848 Mom and Dad won't take me to California 136 00:05:06,890 --> 00:05:08,516 to see Stephen Hawking. 137 00:05:08,558 --> 00:05:09,684 You thought they would take you 138 00:05:09,726 --> 00:05:11,728 to California? Yes. 139 00:05:11,770 --> 00:05:13,897 They wouldn't even buy me this book at the book fair. 140 00:05:13,939 --> 00:05:15,565 I had to get it at the library. 141 00:05:15,607 --> 00:05:17,734 There's a booger on one of the pages. 142 00:05:17,776 --> 00:05:20,612 Well, I may never get another chance to see him in person. 143 00:05:20,654 --> 00:05:23,073 Suck it up. You always get everything you want. 144 00:05:23,115 --> 00:05:24,449 That's not true. 145 00:05:24,491 --> 00:05:26,576 You got a computer. 146 00:05:26,618 --> 00:05:28,787 I'm reading a booger book. Fine. 147 00:05:28,829 --> 00:05:30,413 How do you recommend I "suck it up"? 148 00:05:30,455 --> 00:05:32,332 I don't know, when you don't get your way, 149 00:05:32,373 --> 00:05:33,625 shut up and move on. 150 00:05:33,667 --> 00:05:35,836 Is that what you do? Yeah. 151 00:05:35,877 --> 00:05:38,005 And that's why you don't have a computer. 152 00:05:39,673 --> 00:05:40,882 (sighs) 153 00:05:45,720 --> 00:05:47,848 Georgie is my son-- I have the right 154 00:05:47,889 --> 00:05:50,517 to know who he's spending time with. 155 00:05:50,558 --> 00:05:52,144 You talking about Jana? 156 00:05:52,186 --> 00:05:53,394 You know her? 157 00:05:53,436 --> 00:05:55,189 Well, I don't really know her. 158 00:05:55,230 --> 00:05:57,356 I've seen them hanging out together at Dale's store 159 00:05:57,398 --> 00:05:58,566 a couple of times. 160 00:05:58,608 --> 00:05:59,860 She's cute. 161 00:05:59,901 --> 00:06:02,988 Great. So you know even more than I do. 162 00:06:03,030 --> 00:06:04,865 (chuckles): Always have. 163 00:06:04,906 --> 00:06:08,160 (sighs) I don't feel I'm being out of line 164 00:06:08,202 --> 00:06:09,786 wanting to... 165 00:06:09,828 --> 00:06:11,955 know how old this girl is 166 00:06:11,997 --> 00:06:15,416 or what church she goes to or her last name. 167 00:06:15,458 --> 00:06:16,417 Owens. 168 00:06:16,459 --> 00:06:17,585 (exhales) 169 00:06:17,627 --> 00:06:19,921 What? Now you know. 170 00:06:19,963 --> 00:06:22,007 Unbelievable! 171 00:06:22,049 --> 00:06:23,925 Oh, geez, you worry 172 00:06:23,967 --> 00:06:25,426 about Sheldon not being normal, 173 00:06:25,468 --> 00:06:27,470 now you're worried about Georgie being normal-- 174 00:06:27,512 --> 00:06:29,348 how did I raise such a turd? 175 00:06:29,388 --> 00:06:30,891 I am not... 176 00:06:30,932 --> 00:06:32,433 that word. 177 00:06:32,475 --> 00:06:36,521 If you can't say the word, you might be the word. 178 00:06:37,689 --> 00:06:38,857 Hmm. 179 00:06:38,899 --> 00:06:41,860 (chuckles) 180 00:06:41,902 --> 00:06:45,155 ADULT SHELDON: Over the next few days, I tried to take my sister's advice 181 00:06:45,197 --> 00:06:46,405 and "suck it up." 182 00:06:46,447 --> 00:06:48,033 But how could I, 183 00:06:48,075 --> 00:06:50,869 when everything reminded me of Stephen Hawking? 184 00:06:50,911 --> 00:06:52,996 (imitating engine revving) 185 00:06:53,038 --> 00:06:55,207 Hmm. 186 00:06:57,584 --> 00:06:58,752 (groans) 187 00:06:58,793 --> 00:07:02,256 AUTOMATED VOICE: L-E-A-R-N. 188 00:07:02,297 --> 00:07:04,465 That is correct. Now spell... 189 00:07:04,507 --> 00:07:06,051 Oh, dear! 190 00:07:09,012 --> 00:07:10,805 ♪ ♪ 191 00:07:10,847 --> 00:07:12,933 GEORGE JR.: It's actually a shampoo for ladies, 192 00:07:12,974 --> 00:07:15,435 but my hair just responds to it. 193 00:07:18,146 --> 00:07:19,856 JANA: So, what are you doing Friday night? 194 00:07:19,898 --> 00:07:21,316 GEORGE JR.: No plans. 195 00:07:21,358 --> 00:07:23,526 JANA: My parents are gonna be out of town. 196 00:07:23,568 --> 00:07:25,612 Really? 197 00:07:25,653 --> 00:07:27,739 Wanna come over? 198 00:07:29,908 --> 00:07:32,702 My parents won't let me if your folks ain't there. 199 00:07:33,536 --> 00:07:34,913 JANA: Okay. 200 00:07:36,123 --> 00:07:38,583 Uh, but I guess I don't have to tell 'em. 201 00:07:39,376 --> 00:07:40,877 JANA: Cool. 202 00:07:40,919 --> 00:07:42,796 STURGIS: Okay, that's it. 203 00:07:42,837 --> 00:07:45,006 ADULT SHELDON: Nothing was able to shake me from my doldrums, 204 00:07:45,048 --> 00:07:48,760 not even Dr. Sturgis's jaunty new sweater-vest. 205 00:07:48,802 --> 00:07:50,137 Sheldon? 206 00:07:50,178 --> 00:07:51,554 Yes? 207 00:07:51,596 --> 00:07:53,514 You seem distracted. 208 00:07:53,556 --> 00:07:56,977 I really wanted to see Stephen Hawking speak at Caltech, 209 00:07:57,018 --> 00:07:59,562 but my parents can't afford the trip. 210 00:07:59,604 --> 00:08:01,189 That's too bad. 211 00:08:01,231 --> 00:08:03,942 Dr. H puts on a heck of a show. 212 00:08:03,984 --> 00:08:05,693 I believe it. 213 00:08:05,735 --> 00:08:09,697 Would it make you feel better to know this vest is reversible? 214 00:08:09,739 --> 00:08:11,450 A little. Thanks. 215 00:08:11,491 --> 00:08:12,826 Wait. 216 00:08:12,867 --> 00:08:15,370 I may be able to help you with Hawking. 217 00:08:15,412 --> 00:08:16,997 Really? 218 00:08:17,038 --> 00:08:21,542 This vest is not the only thing that's full of surprises. 219 00:08:24,503 --> 00:08:26,256 Where ya goin'? 220 00:08:26,298 --> 00:08:27,590 Out. 221 00:08:27,632 --> 00:08:29,009 Out where? 222 00:08:29,050 --> 00:08:30,135 Jana's. 223 00:08:30,177 --> 00:08:32,012 Her parents gonna be there? 224 00:08:32,053 --> 00:08:33,847 Yep. Okay. 225 00:08:33,888 --> 00:08:35,682 Let me just call and make sure. 226 00:08:35,723 --> 00:08:37,767 Owens. 227 00:08:37,809 --> 00:08:39,853 Owens. 228 00:08:39,894 --> 00:08:41,938 That's her last name, right? Owens? 229 00:08:41,980 --> 00:08:43,815 Why are you being so weird? 230 00:08:43,857 --> 00:08:46,193 I'm not being weird. Are you? 231 00:08:46,234 --> 00:08:47,610 No. 232 00:08:47,652 --> 00:08:50,155 Good. No one's being weird. 233 00:08:50,197 --> 00:08:51,323 Don't call 'em. 234 00:08:51,365 --> 00:08:52,573 Why not? 235 00:08:52,615 --> 00:08:54,284 Why can't you just trust me? 236 00:08:54,326 --> 00:08:55,952 (exhales) 237 00:08:57,371 --> 00:08:59,622 Because I know that you're lying. 238 00:08:59,664 --> 00:09:01,624 What? No, I'm not. 239 00:09:01,666 --> 00:09:03,668 I heard you on the phone with Jana. 240 00:09:03,710 --> 00:09:05,628 You spied on me? 241 00:09:05,670 --> 00:09:07,714 I didn't mean to, but I'm glad that I did, 242 00:09:07,755 --> 00:09:09,174 because you just lied to my face. 243 00:09:09,216 --> 00:09:10,800 You are not going anywhere. 244 00:09:10,842 --> 00:09:13,011 Try and stop me. 245 00:09:13,053 --> 00:09:16,097 You walk out that door, and your father gets involved. 246 00:09:19,726 --> 00:09:21,853 I don't need this. 247 00:09:24,772 --> 00:09:26,566 (door slams) 248 00:09:26,607 --> 00:09:28,735 Dang. 249 00:09:31,779 --> 00:09:33,448 Dad. 250 00:09:33,490 --> 00:09:35,783 You missed everything. What happened? 251 00:09:35,825 --> 00:09:37,911 Georgie lied to Mom to be alone at Jana's house, 252 00:09:37,952 --> 00:09:40,414 but Mom knew 'cause she listened in on his phone call. 253 00:09:40,455 --> 00:09:41,789 Oh, boy. 254 00:09:41,831 --> 00:09:43,666 Now he's grounded and everyone's mad. 255 00:09:43,708 --> 00:09:45,419 Not me. I'm super happy. 256 00:09:45,460 --> 00:09:47,462 Well... bye. 257 00:09:47,504 --> 00:09:51,174 Dad, the university offered to pay for us to go to California! 258 00:09:51,216 --> 00:09:53,510 They're even putting us up in a hotel. 259 00:09:53,552 --> 00:09:55,011 You're kidding. 260 00:09:55,053 --> 00:09:56,346 We're going to California? 261 00:09:56,388 --> 00:09:57,889 No, just me and Dad. 262 00:09:59,349 --> 00:10:00,600 That's fair. 263 00:10:00,641 --> 00:10:02,602 I'm so happy for you. 264 00:10:02,643 --> 00:10:04,645 ADULT SHELDON: Sometimes sarcasm 265 00:10:04,687 --> 00:10:06,440 was laid on so thick 266 00:10:06,481 --> 00:10:07,732 even I could detect it. 267 00:10:07,774 --> 00:10:09,276 Thanks! 268 00:10:09,317 --> 00:10:12,487 ADULT SHELDON: This was not one of those times. 269 00:10:12,529 --> 00:10:14,239 I see. 270 00:10:14,281 --> 00:10:16,366 Well, no, that makes sense. 271 00:10:16,408 --> 00:10:18,743 Okay, John, thanks. 272 00:10:18,785 --> 00:10:21,162 Bye. 273 00:10:21,996 --> 00:10:23,331 Sheldon was right. 274 00:10:23,373 --> 00:10:25,542 They're offerin' to pay for the whole trip. 275 00:10:25,584 --> 00:10:26,667 Why? 276 00:10:26,709 --> 00:10:28,378 Sturgis talked to his boss, 277 00:10:28,420 --> 00:10:30,880 and they really want to keep Sheldon goin' to school there. 278 00:10:30,922 --> 00:10:33,508 I guess I could take him. 279 00:10:33,550 --> 00:10:35,093 Why you? 280 00:10:35,135 --> 00:10:36,595 He asked me first. 281 00:10:36,636 --> 00:10:38,805 I'm mad at Georgie right now. 282 00:10:38,846 --> 00:10:41,141 It'd be good for us to have some space. 283 00:10:41,182 --> 00:10:42,892 So, you pick a fight with Georgie, 284 00:10:42,934 --> 00:10:44,936 and I don't get to go to California? 285 00:10:46,104 --> 00:10:48,565 (huffs) Fine, you can go. 286 00:10:48,607 --> 00:10:50,024 Thank you. 287 00:10:50,066 --> 00:10:52,777 Have fun managing Sheldon's bathroom schedule 288 00:10:52,819 --> 00:10:54,821 in different time zones. 289 00:11:02,829 --> 00:11:06,374 Let me get a picture of my boys before their big trip. 290 00:11:06,416 --> 00:11:07,959 It's smart to document this. 291 00:11:08,001 --> 00:11:10,003 Next time you see me, I'll have been in the presence 292 00:11:10,044 --> 00:11:11,630 of Stephen Hawking. 293 00:11:11,670 --> 00:11:13,214 Smile. 294 00:11:13,256 --> 00:11:14,715 I'd prefer to look serious. 295 00:11:14,757 --> 00:11:17,302 This may appear in a textbook someday. 296 00:11:17,344 --> 00:11:19,304 Say, "Stephen Hawking." 297 00:11:19,346 --> 00:11:21,097 Stephen Hawking. Stephen Hawking. 298 00:11:21,139 --> 00:11:24,351 SHELDON: Aw, you made me smile. 299 00:11:25,810 --> 00:11:28,021 (sportscaster speaking indistinctly on TV) 300 00:11:30,398 --> 00:11:32,025 Wash up for dinner. 301 00:11:32,066 --> 00:11:33,193 I ain't eatin'. 302 00:11:33,234 --> 00:11:35,153 Well, you're not watchin' TV. 303 00:11:35,195 --> 00:11:37,780 I can't leave the house, and now I can't watch TV. 304 00:11:37,822 --> 00:11:40,699 Yeah, it's called being grounded. 305 00:11:43,911 --> 00:11:45,622 I can't wait to move out. 306 00:11:45,664 --> 00:11:46,831 What was that?! 307 00:11:46,873 --> 00:11:48,500 Next time, I'll say it on the phone, 308 00:11:48,542 --> 00:11:50,585 so you can hear me. 309 00:11:50,627 --> 00:11:52,546 ♪ ♪ 310 00:11:52,587 --> 00:11:55,173 (doo-wop music playing on radio) 311 00:11:55,215 --> 00:11:57,884 You keep frownin' like that, you're gonna get wrinkles 312 00:11:57,925 --> 00:11:59,553 like your meemaw. 313 00:11:59,594 --> 00:12:01,137 You look great. 314 00:12:01,179 --> 00:12:04,599 I know, I just wanted to hear you say it. 315 00:12:06,100 --> 00:12:09,062 What's on your mind? 316 00:12:09,103 --> 00:12:11,648 Sheldon always gets everything he wants. 317 00:12:11,690 --> 00:12:13,692 I guess he does. 318 00:12:13,732 --> 00:12:15,860 That's not fair, huh? 319 00:12:15,902 --> 00:12:17,195 No! 320 00:12:17,237 --> 00:12:18,946 On the other hand, he's just 321 00:12:18,988 --> 00:12:21,658 going to some science lecture. 322 00:12:21,700 --> 00:12:25,453 I know, but he gets to go on a plane to California. 323 00:12:25,495 --> 00:12:26,829 Planes aren't all that great. 324 00:12:26,871 --> 00:12:29,374 You can't even smoke on 'em anymore. 325 00:12:29,416 --> 00:12:30,584 I tell you what, 326 00:12:30,625 --> 00:12:31,834 after practice today, 327 00:12:31,876 --> 00:12:34,003 you and me will do somethin' fun. 328 00:12:34,045 --> 00:12:35,880 Can I have my first cigarette? 329 00:12:35,922 --> 00:12:37,257 No! 330 00:12:38,132 --> 00:12:39,551 Can I get my ears pierced? 331 00:12:39,593 --> 00:12:41,094 Your mom won't like that. 332 00:12:41,135 --> 00:12:44,222 So, maybe. 333 00:12:44,264 --> 00:12:47,183 (singers vocalizing on radio) 334 00:12:47,225 --> 00:12:49,436 ♪ ♪ 335 00:12:53,981 --> 00:12:56,526 All right, 34A and B-- this is us. 336 00:12:56,568 --> 00:12:58,528 All right, you want the aisle or the window? 337 00:12:58,570 --> 00:12:59,946 Which one is assigned to me? 338 00:12:59,987 --> 00:13:01,822 It doesn't matter, just pick one. 339 00:13:01,864 --> 00:13:03,658 Well, if I sit by the window, I can watch the takeoff 340 00:13:03,700 --> 00:13:05,826 and landing, but if I sit on the aisle, 341 00:13:05,868 --> 00:13:07,328 I'm closer to the bathroom. 342 00:13:07,370 --> 00:13:08,705 Here we go. 343 00:13:08,747 --> 00:13:09,997 Although if I'm by the window, you'll have 344 00:13:10,039 --> 00:13:11,916 to get up when I use the bathroom. 345 00:13:11,958 --> 00:13:13,251 But if I'm not, I'll have 346 00:13:13,293 --> 00:13:15,128 to get up when you use the bathroom. 347 00:13:15,169 --> 00:13:16,170 Just pick one. 348 00:13:16,212 --> 00:13:17,338 It's a tricky decision. 349 00:13:17,380 --> 00:13:18,632 My bladder's smaller than yours... 350 00:13:18,673 --> 00:13:20,717 Everything okay here? 351 00:13:20,759 --> 00:13:21,968 About to be. 352 00:13:22,009 --> 00:13:23,303 Here! (exclaims) 353 00:13:23,344 --> 00:13:24,387 Aisle it is! (chuckles) 354 00:13:24,429 --> 00:13:25,430 We're good. 355 00:13:25,472 --> 00:13:27,223 Oh, okay. 356 00:13:30,769 --> 00:13:32,479 You want to help me with this? 357 00:13:32,520 --> 00:13:33,812 No. 358 00:13:33,854 --> 00:13:35,607 Hey! 359 00:13:35,649 --> 00:13:37,358 You're the one who lied to me. 360 00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:41,696 Well, I'm done talkin' to you, so it'll never happen again. 361 00:13:44,491 --> 00:13:45,450 (knocking) 362 00:13:45,492 --> 00:13:46,867 What? 363 00:13:46,909 --> 00:13:48,745 I know you don't want to talk, and that's fine. 364 00:13:48,787 --> 00:13:51,247 You can just listen. 365 00:13:51,289 --> 00:13:55,335 (sighs) Life is hard enough if you make good decisions, 366 00:13:55,376 --> 00:13:58,463 but if you make bad ones, it gets even harder. 367 00:13:58,505 --> 00:14:00,881 Nothin' was gonna happen with Jana. 368 00:14:00,923 --> 00:14:02,342 Georgie... No! 369 00:14:02,383 --> 00:14:04,010 You always assume the worst with me. 370 00:14:04,051 --> 00:14:06,929 I'm sorry you were a perfect kid and I'm just a screwup. 371 00:14:06,971 --> 00:14:09,557 You are not a screwup. 372 00:14:09,599 --> 00:14:10,849 (sighs) 373 00:14:10,891 --> 00:14:12,977 And I was not a perfect kid. 374 00:14:13,019 --> 00:14:16,022 Oh, what'd you do, sleep through church one mornin'? 375 00:14:17,482 --> 00:14:20,193 For your information... 376 00:14:20,234 --> 00:14:22,987 I used to skip class... 377 00:14:23,029 --> 00:14:24,489 so that I could 378 00:14:24,531 --> 00:14:26,700 drink beer 379 00:14:26,741 --> 00:14:28,867 in my boyfriend's truck. 380 00:14:29,952 --> 00:14:31,871 Dad had a truck back then? 381 00:14:31,912 --> 00:14:34,374 Not talkin' about your dad. 382 00:14:34,415 --> 00:14:36,417 Whoa. 383 00:14:39,253 --> 00:14:41,255 I also... 384 00:14:41,297 --> 00:14:43,341 stole your meemaw's car 385 00:14:43,383 --> 00:14:45,844 and crashed it into a ditch. 386 00:14:45,885 --> 00:14:47,011 Really? 387 00:14:47,053 --> 00:14:48,429 With that boyfriend who wasn't Dad? 388 00:14:48,471 --> 00:14:50,264 Missin' the point! If the point is 389 00:14:50,306 --> 00:14:52,433 you made some bad decisions and turned out fine, 390 00:14:52,475 --> 00:14:54,268 then why you being so hard on me? 391 00:14:54,310 --> 00:14:58,022 Because some decisions you cannot walk away from 392 00:14:58,064 --> 00:15:00,483 and they will affect the rest of your life. 393 00:15:00,525 --> 00:15:01,901 If you're talkin' about Jana getting pregnant, 394 00:15:01,942 --> 00:15:03,361 she ain't gonna. 395 00:15:03,403 --> 00:15:05,864 That is what I thought, and the next thing I know, 396 00:15:05,905 --> 00:15:08,115 I'm at the courthouse gettin' married. 397 00:15:08,157 --> 00:15:10,410 You got married 398 00:15:10,451 --> 00:15:12,119 because you were pregnant? 399 00:15:15,498 --> 00:15:17,250 Yes. 400 00:15:18,418 --> 00:15:20,294 So, I was a mistake? 401 00:15:20,336 --> 00:15:22,338 No! No! 402 00:15:22,380 --> 00:15:23,423 (groans) 403 00:15:23,464 --> 00:15:25,675 You are a blessin'. 404 00:15:25,717 --> 00:15:27,510 The mistake 405 00:15:27,552 --> 00:15:30,388 was lyin' to my parents, so that I could spend 406 00:15:30,430 --> 00:15:33,516 the night at your dad's house. 407 00:15:33,558 --> 00:15:35,518 And, you know, tequila. 408 00:15:35,560 --> 00:15:37,687 Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. 409 00:15:37,729 --> 00:15:40,189 We're expecting a smooth flight to Los Angeles. 410 00:15:40,231 --> 00:15:42,525 Before we take off, please direct your attention 411 00:15:42,567 --> 00:15:44,360 to the flight attendants as they review 412 00:15:44,402 --> 00:15:46,446 some important safety procedures. 413 00:15:46,487 --> 00:15:49,240 "Safety procedures"? Oh, baby. 414 00:15:49,282 --> 00:15:51,284 FLIGHT ATTENDANT: Take a minute to locate 415 00:15:51,325 --> 00:15:53,035 the exit closest to you. 416 00:15:53,077 --> 00:15:54,913 The nearest exit could be behind you. 417 00:15:54,954 --> 00:15:56,664 Should the cabin experience 418 00:15:56,706 --> 00:15:59,250 sudden pressure loss, oxygen masks will 419 00:15:59,292 --> 00:16:00,959 drop down from above your seat... 420 00:16:01,001 --> 00:16:02,962 Why would the cabin lose pressure? 421 00:16:03,003 --> 00:16:05,465 It won't. Place the mask over your mouth and nose, 422 00:16:05,506 --> 00:16:08,843 like this, pull the strap to tighten it. 423 00:16:08,885 --> 00:16:11,304 If you are traveling with children, make sure that your 424 00:16:11,345 --> 00:16:14,265 own mask is on first before helping your child... 425 00:16:14,307 --> 00:16:16,434 I don't like this at all. 426 00:16:16,476 --> 00:16:17,852 It's just a precaution. 427 00:16:17,894 --> 00:16:19,896 You know... perfectly safe. 428 00:16:19,938 --> 00:16:21,648 FLIGHT ATTENDANT: In the unlikely event 429 00:16:21,689 --> 00:16:23,775 of a water landing and evacuation... (heart beating) 430 00:16:23,817 --> 00:16:27,153 (echoing): Water landing, water landing, water landing... 431 00:16:27,194 --> 00:16:28,321 I can't do this. 432 00:16:28,362 --> 00:16:29,906 (buckle clicking) 433 00:16:33,284 --> 00:16:35,745 Keep going, we'll be right back. 434 00:16:35,787 --> 00:16:36,913 Uh, sir?! 435 00:16:36,955 --> 00:16:39,457 Sheldon, come out of there! No! 436 00:16:39,499 --> 00:16:41,835 At least open the door. 437 00:16:42,961 --> 00:16:44,879 Tell them I need to get off. 438 00:16:44,921 --> 00:16:46,380 FLIGHT ATTENDANT: Sir? 439 00:16:46,422 --> 00:16:48,174 You both need to return to your seats. 440 00:16:48,215 --> 00:16:50,092 Just one second. 441 00:16:50,134 --> 00:16:51,260 Sir. Sir... 442 00:16:53,012 --> 00:16:54,430 If you want to see Stephen Hawking, 443 00:16:54,472 --> 00:16:56,474 we have to sit down right now. 444 00:16:56,516 --> 00:16:59,017 It's too dangerous. I can't! It's okay to be scared. 445 00:16:59,059 --> 00:17:01,103 Sir? Th-That's when you got to dig deep and be brave. 446 00:17:01,145 --> 00:17:03,105 (pounding on door) So, what do you say? 447 00:17:03,147 --> 00:17:05,566 No, I'm your terrified little boy! 448 00:17:05,608 --> 00:17:06,985 Okay. (pounding on door) 449 00:17:07,025 --> 00:17:08,945 Sir, please, they're gonna call security! 450 00:17:08,987 --> 00:17:10,196 Just one more second. 451 00:17:11,906 --> 00:17:13,533 Mr. Spock! 452 00:17:13,574 --> 00:17:15,994 He flies around all the time in that spaceship. 453 00:17:16,034 --> 00:17:17,829 He's not afraid, is he? 454 00:17:17,871 --> 00:17:19,455 I'm not Mr. Spock. 455 00:17:19,497 --> 00:17:23,041 No, but-but I've seen you pretend to be him. 456 00:17:24,585 --> 00:17:25,670 Could you do that right now? 457 00:17:25,712 --> 00:17:28,130 You be Spock, I'll be Kirk. 458 00:17:30,550 --> 00:17:33,011 (sighs) Maybe. 459 00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:36,222 Okay, Mr. Spock. 460 00:17:36,263 --> 00:17:39,600 Your first order is to return to your seat. 461 00:17:40,810 --> 00:17:42,729 Aye, Captain. 462 00:17:44,981 --> 00:17:47,191 CAPTAIN: Flight attendants, prepare for takeoff. 463 00:17:50,653 --> 00:17:52,739 You okay, Mr. Spock? 464 00:17:52,780 --> 00:17:54,741 Doing my best, sir. 465 00:17:54,782 --> 00:17:56,743 (engines roar) 466 00:17:59,453 --> 00:18:02,540 The captain and Mr. Spock don't hold hands. 467 00:18:02,582 --> 00:18:04,751 Sorry. 468 00:18:13,300 --> 00:18:15,970 Okay, maybe just this once. 469 00:18:21,100 --> 00:18:24,353 (Star Trek theme playing) 470 00:18:34,822 --> 00:18:37,241 I think we've been lied to about California. 471 00:18:37,283 --> 00:18:39,869 No one on this campus is tan at all. 472 00:18:41,037 --> 00:18:43,163 No, they are not. 473 00:18:45,374 --> 00:18:48,461 Imagine all the stimulating conversations 474 00:18:48,502 --> 00:18:50,504 that must go on at these tables. 475 00:18:50,546 --> 00:18:52,090 I bet. 476 00:18:53,382 --> 00:18:56,594 I can see myself going here one day. 477 00:18:56,636 --> 00:18:59,806 I think you'd fit right in. one day.