1 00:00:00,250 --> 00:00:02,168 [George] Previously on Young Sheldon… 2 00:00:02,252 --> 00:00:06,172 Mary Cooper… I want to sex you up. 3 00:00:07,632 --> 00:00:08,466 [gasps] 4 00:00:08,550 --> 00:00:10,010 I have good news. 5 00:00:10,093 --> 00:00:11,136 I could use it. 6 00:00:11,219 --> 00:00:13,722 I got a job at the bowling alley. 7 00:00:16,182 --> 00:00:18,393 -Working with Brenda? -Every day. 8 00:00:18,476 --> 00:00:20,937 I am so sorry about today. 9 00:00:21,020 --> 00:00:23,440 I'd just hate to see you walk away from the Lord. 10 00:00:23,523 --> 00:00:25,984 Feels like he's walkin' away from me. 11 00:00:33,700 --> 00:00:34,659 What is that? 12 00:00:34,826 --> 00:00:35,994 Hamburger Helper. 13 00:00:36,077 --> 00:00:37,662 It's official, we're poor. 14 00:00:37,954 --> 00:00:40,999 We're not poor. We… There's hamburger in there. 15 00:00:41,249 --> 00:00:42,584 There is hamburger in there? 16 00:00:43,460 --> 00:00:44,544 I like it. 17 00:00:44,627 --> 00:00:46,671 It helps hamburger make a great meal. 18 00:00:46,755 --> 00:00:49,299 It's a good thing, 'cause you're definitely poor. 19 00:00:49,382 --> 00:00:51,134 -Like us. -We're fine. 20 00:00:51,217 --> 00:00:53,136 -Actually-- -Just eat. 21 00:00:53,344 --> 00:00:55,388 -Do we still say grace? -Why not? 22 00:00:55,597 --> 00:00:58,099 Mom's been taking a break from church. Mom? 23 00:00:58,850 --> 00:01:02,062 Well, I hadn't really thought about it. We can if you want to. 24 00:01:02,145 --> 00:01:03,104 Let's not. 25 00:01:03,188 --> 00:01:05,940 As meaningless as it is, I do find it comforting. 26 00:01:06,024 --> 00:01:08,651 Will somebody make a decision? It's getting cold. 27 00:01:08,735 --> 00:01:10,987 No. It's good cold or hot. Like Grape Nuts. 28 00:01:11,071 --> 00:01:12,197 Ooh, can I say it? 29 00:01:12,697 --> 00:01:13,531 Sure. 30 00:01:15,533 --> 00:01:16,659 [Missy clears throat] 31 00:01:16,826 --> 00:01:18,787 Bless us, Lord, for the food we receive 32 00:01:18,870 --> 00:01:20,830 and bless the hands that prepared it. 33 00:01:21,456 --> 00:01:24,125 Let me have a good hair day for pictures this week. 34 00:01:24,876 --> 00:01:27,003 -Let's see. What else do I want? -Wrap it up. 35 00:01:27,504 --> 00:01:30,298 Please let Dad find a full-time job before we lose cable. Amen. 36 00:01:30,381 --> 00:01:31,758 -Amen. -Amen. 37 00:01:31,841 --> 00:01:33,802 [theme music playing] 38 00:01:56,574 --> 00:02:01,079 So, how's it going with this whole no church thing? 39 00:02:02,330 --> 00:02:05,083 It's a little weird, but I'm figuring it out. 40 00:02:05,166 --> 00:02:06,709 Think you might go back? 41 00:02:08,086 --> 00:02:09,420 I don't know yet. 42 00:02:09,504 --> 00:02:10,922 Find a different church? 43 00:02:11,172 --> 00:02:12,882 I don't know, George. 44 00:02:15,552 --> 00:02:17,303 I'm gonna get a beer. 45 00:02:17,387 --> 00:02:21,182 You… care to join me like the good old days? 46 00:02:21,266 --> 00:02:24,894 Just 'cause I'm not going to church doesn't mean I'm suddenly a drinker. 47 00:02:24,978 --> 00:02:28,064 Okay. Well, then I guess me and my friends will say good night. 48 00:02:31,317 --> 00:02:32,277 We need to talk. 49 00:02:32,527 --> 00:02:33,528 About what? 50 00:02:33,611 --> 00:02:36,447 You do their taxes. How bad off are we? 51 00:02:36,531 --> 00:02:37,907 Based on their income, 52 00:02:37,991 --> 00:02:39,909 we'll run out by the end of the year. 53 00:02:39,993 --> 00:02:41,995 -Before or after Christmas? -Before. 54 00:02:42,245 --> 00:02:43,913 Not what I wanted to hear. 55 00:02:45,248 --> 00:02:46,249 [sighs] 56 00:02:46,332 --> 00:02:47,750 Anything we can do to help? 57 00:02:48,126 --> 00:02:49,752 Perhaps we could sell our stuff. 58 00:02:49,836 --> 00:02:51,004 But I like my stuff. 59 00:02:51,671 --> 00:02:53,756 I like my stuff too. Let's keep thinking. 60 00:02:54,632 --> 00:02:56,426 -[program on TV] -[phone ringing] 61 00:02:58,219 --> 00:02:59,053 [turns TV off] 62 00:03:00,638 --> 00:03:01,472 Hello. 63 00:03:01,556 --> 00:03:03,433 Connie, Grant Linkletter. 64 00:03:03,975 --> 00:03:05,476 Hello, Grant. 65 00:03:05,560 --> 00:03:06,853 What can I do for you? 66 00:03:06,936 --> 00:03:09,606 Well, I looked at my calendar and it's been six weeks 67 00:03:09,689 --> 00:03:12,567 since I asked you out, so I thought I'd give it a shot. 68 00:03:12,650 --> 00:03:14,903 You ask me out every six weeks? 69 00:03:14,986 --> 00:03:17,822 It used to be nine, but we're not getting any younger. 70 00:03:19,240 --> 00:03:20,575 I'll tell you what. 71 00:03:21,451 --> 00:03:22,285 Fine. 72 00:03:22,368 --> 00:03:24,203 -Really? -Why not? 73 00:03:24,287 --> 00:03:25,705 [chuckles] Excellent! 74 00:03:25,788 --> 00:03:27,165 But I wanna be clear. 75 00:03:27,248 --> 00:03:29,542 This is just one of those… What you call it? 76 00:03:29,626 --> 00:03:32,629 Platonic things. We're just having dinner. 77 00:03:32,712 --> 00:03:33,922 I'll take it. 78 00:03:34,005 --> 00:03:37,050 Now would you prefer a restaurant or some good home cooking? 79 00:03:37,133 --> 00:03:38,927 I make seven kinds of soup. 80 00:03:39,010 --> 00:03:41,429 -I'll stick with a restaurant. -Fair enough. 81 00:03:41,512 --> 00:03:45,516 But one day you'll try my mushroom barley and your taste buds will swoon. 82 00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:46,643 Good night, Grant. 83 00:03:46,726 --> 00:03:48,770 The secret is how I cook the onions! 84 00:03:57,362 --> 00:03:58,988 Chicken coop, now. 85 00:03:59,656 --> 00:04:00,490 [door opens] 86 00:04:03,576 --> 00:04:04,410 Hi. 87 00:04:04,619 --> 00:04:06,079 What are we doing? 88 00:04:06,162 --> 00:04:07,580 What are you doing? 89 00:04:08,289 --> 00:04:10,625 You hired Mary to work at the bowling alley. 90 00:04:11,459 --> 00:04:12,835 She needed a job. 91 00:04:12,919 --> 00:04:14,212 I was being nice. 92 00:04:14,295 --> 00:04:15,713 You don't think it's weird? 93 00:04:16,214 --> 00:04:19,717 This right here, it's all weird. 94 00:04:21,010 --> 00:04:21,886 Are you drunk? 95 00:04:22,345 --> 00:04:23,972 Not nearly enough. 96 00:04:24,055 --> 00:04:26,182 You and Mary working together is a bad idea 97 00:04:26,265 --> 00:04:29,435 considering, you know, you and me. 98 00:04:29,519 --> 00:04:31,312 We haven't done anything, George. 99 00:04:31,396 --> 00:04:33,272 There was considering. You know it. 100 00:04:34,649 --> 00:04:36,734 What do you want me to do? To fire her? 101 00:04:36,818 --> 00:04:39,320 No, no, that'll be weird. 102 00:04:39,404 --> 00:04:42,740 Which is exactly where we started. Good night. 103 00:04:48,830 --> 00:04:50,540 You understand what I'm saying. 104 00:04:53,334 --> 00:04:55,044 Okay. So what are you good at? 105 00:04:55,753 --> 00:04:56,587 I'm popular. 106 00:04:57,005 --> 00:04:58,089 That is not a skill. 107 00:04:58,172 --> 00:04:59,007 You can't do it. 108 00:04:59,090 --> 00:04:59,966 Fine. 109 00:05:00,591 --> 00:05:01,884 You could go on Jeopardy! 110 00:05:01,968 --> 00:05:04,637 Never. I don't like answers in the form of questions. 111 00:05:04,721 --> 00:05:06,222 I like answers to be answers 112 00:05:06,306 --> 00:05:08,391 and questions to be questions, thank you. 113 00:05:09,058 --> 00:05:12,103 Perhaps I could sell story ideas to TV shows like Star Trek. 114 00:05:12,186 --> 00:05:14,063 Do you think they'd listen to a kid? 115 00:05:14,147 --> 00:05:15,565 My voice has gotten deeper. 116 00:05:15,690 --> 00:05:18,192 I answered the phone and wasn't mistaken for Mom. 117 00:05:18,735 --> 00:05:20,570 Star Trek's not gonna buy your ideas. 118 00:05:20,653 --> 00:05:21,696 We'll see. 119 00:05:21,779 --> 00:05:24,115 In one, the Enterprise falls into a time tunnel 120 00:05:24,198 --> 00:05:26,701 and Worf becomes a Worf from the future. 121 00:05:27,660 --> 00:05:29,203 We could let people punch you. 122 00:05:29,454 --> 00:05:32,165 No. All our profit would just go to medical expenses. 123 00:05:38,713 --> 00:05:42,091 Hey, Brenda, I was trying to do the books for the quarter 124 00:05:42,175 --> 00:05:44,343 and I was having trouble making sense of it. 125 00:05:44,427 --> 00:05:47,180 You know, Mary, if it's too big of a mess 126 00:05:47,263 --> 00:05:50,641 and you'd rather work somewhere else, I'd understand. 127 00:05:50,725 --> 00:05:52,685 No, I'll figure it out. 128 00:05:53,436 --> 00:05:56,355 Great. So happy you're here. 129 00:05:56,439 --> 00:05:57,732 Oh. 130 00:06:02,070 --> 00:06:03,237 Hey there. 131 00:06:03,321 --> 00:06:05,364 Oh. [chuckles] 132 00:06:05,448 --> 00:06:06,282 Hi, Mary. 133 00:06:07,992 --> 00:06:09,786 Got an eight-pounder that's not pink. 134 00:06:11,287 --> 00:06:13,039 I didn't know you bowled. 135 00:06:13,122 --> 00:06:14,415 I didn't know you did. 136 00:06:14,499 --> 00:06:16,250 Actually… 137 00:06:16,793 --> 00:06:18,211 I work here now. 138 00:06:18,294 --> 00:06:20,588 Oh! Sure, okay. 139 00:06:21,297 --> 00:06:22,632 I… 140 00:06:22,715 --> 00:06:27,303 I'm so sorry about how things went down at church. 141 00:06:28,262 --> 00:06:30,598 If it helps, the place has gone to heck. 142 00:06:31,432 --> 00:06:32,308 Good. 143 00:06:32,391 --> 00:06:33,976 [both chuckle] 144 00:06:35,728 --> 00:06:37,814 I sure do miss working with you. 145 00:06:38,898 --> 00:06:42,318 Well, we can still be friends even if we don't work together. 146 00:06:43,820 --> 00:06:44,654 I'd like that. 147 00:06:45,404 --> 00:06:46,823 You find a kiddie ball yet? 148 00:06:47,281 --> 00:06:50,326 It's not about the weight. It's just I have small fingers. 149 00:06:51,327 --> 00:06:53,955 Oh, uh, Mary, this is Shannon. 150 00:06:54,038 --> 00:06:57,041 -Shannon, this is Mary Cooper. -Hi. 151 00:06:57,125 --> 00:06:58,793 You used to be Mary Tucker. 152 00:06:59,752 --> 00:07:01,337 Not in a long time. 153 00:07:01,420 --> 00:07:02,588 You remember me? 154 00:07:03,589 --> 00:07:04,632 Sorry, no. 155 00:07:04,715 --> 00:07:07,677 Shannon Dixon, you used to babysit me. 156 00:07:09,178 --> 00:07:10,263 Is that so? 157 00:07:10,763 --> 00:07:11,681 She was so great. 158 00:07:11,764 --> 00:07:13,558 She let me stay up and watch TV 159 00:07:13,641 --> 00:07:15,685 while she'd make out with her boyfriend. 160 00:07:15,768 --> 00:07:16,686 [wheezy laughter] 161 00:07:16,769 --> 00:07:19,188 I don't remember any of that. 162 00:07:19,272 --> 00:07:22,066 I'm not surprised, you hit my dad's liquor pretty hard. 163 00:07:22,150 --> 00:07:23,818 Well, Mary Cooper. 164 00:07:23,901 --> 00:07:26,904 I was young and I hadn't found the Lord. 165 00:07:26,988 --> 00:07:29,448 You two have a great time. 166 00:07:37,081 --> 00:07:38,749 Here's that invoice. 167 00:07:38,833 --> 00:07:42,462 Oh, great. I see Pastor Rob's here again. 168 00:07:43,254 --> 00:07:44,088 Does… 169 00:07:45,089 --> 00:07:46,632 Does he come here often? 170 00:07:47,300 --> 00:07:49,635 Not with that one, she's new. 171 00:07:50,845 --> 00:07:52,847 Well, good for him. 172 00:07:53,556 --> 00:07:56,058 Single, good-looking pastor. 173 00:07:56,309 --> 00:07:59,228 In a small town like this, he might as well be Roger Staubach. 174 00:08:01,939 --> 00:08:03,649 Oh, my God. The Dallas Cowboys. 175 00:08:03,733 --> 00:08:05,484 Oh, sure. Of course. 176 00:08:06,611 --> 00:08:11,157 Hey, if you need me I'm gonna be on the office doing… office things. 177 00:08:17,788 --> 00:08:18,831 What are you doing? 178 00:08:19,123 --> 00:08:22,335 I ran out of beer at home, didn't feel like driving to the store. 179 00:08:22,418 --> 00:08:24,545 So you just waltz in and help yourself? 180 00:08:24,629 --> 00:08:26,214 About sums it up. 181 00:08:27,089 --> 00:08:28,591 I'm changing the locks. 182 00:08:28,674 --> 00:08:29,759 [chuckles] 183 00:08:30,301 --> 00:08:31,552 Cheers. 184 00:08:35,139 --> 00:08:36,807 So how's my daughter doing? 185 00:08:37,183 --> 00:08:38,601 Yeah, she seems okay. 186 00:08:38,893 --> 00:08:40,394 Still trying to figure things out. 187 00:08:41,145 --> 00:08:44,607 I gotta be honest, I'm not upset about less religion in the house. 188 00:08:44,690 --> 00:08:46,150 [chuckles] I hear you. 189 00:08:46,817 --> 00:08:51,072 Although Jesus making her forgive me has come in handy more than a few times. 190 00:08:51,197 --> 00:08:53,115 Yeah, I played that card too. 191 00:08:53,199 --> 00:08:54,450 [Meemaw chuckles] 192 00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:58,246 Then again I remember Mary before God got his mitts on her and… 193 00:08:59,163 --> 00:09:00,873 She was pretty wild. 194 00:09:01,540 --> 00:09:04,210 Don't have to tell me, I was who she was wild with. 195 00:09:04,293 --> 00:09:07,296 Oh, she was wild long before she ever met you. 196 00:09:07,672 --> 00:09:08,589 What do you mean? 197 00:09:09,924 --> 00:09:13,344 Did you think that you were the first person she was wild with? 198 00:09:14,387 --> 00:09:16,389 Well, yeah. 199 00:09:22,728 --> 00:09:25,648 And as the Enterprise is about to be assimilated by the Borg, 200 00:09:25,731 --> 00:09:28,484 another ship appears piloted by Wesley Crusher! 201 00:09:28,651 --> 00:09:29,777 Uh-huh. 202 00:09:29,860 --> 00:09:32,488 It's surprising because he left the show years ago, 203 00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:33,614 so it's a big deal! 204 00:09:33,698 --> 00:09:34,865 If you say so. 205 00:09:34,949 --> 00:09:36,284 I have more. Commander Data-- 206 00:09:36,367 --> 00:09:39,787 I'd like a reservation for dinner. Yes, I'll hold. 207 00:09:39,870 --> 00:09:41,831 You want to do this over dinner? Okay. 208 00:09:41,914 --> 00:09:44,083 I'm taking your grandmother out tonight. 209 00:09:44,375 --> 00:09:45,710 She didn't mention it to me. 210 00:09:45,960 --> 00:09:48,004 Maybe because it doesn't concern you. 211 00:09:48,087 --> 00:09:51,382 My Meemaw, my professor. Who's in the middle of that Venn diagram? 212 00:09:52,258 --> 00:09:54,010 Yes, two people at eight o'clock? 213 00:09:54,218 --> 00:09:56,053 8:00's a little late for Meemaw. 214 00:09:56,512 --> 00:09:57,763 What time does she eat? 215 00:09:57,847 --> 00:10:00,391 Well, she's old like you, so 6:30 at the latest. 216 00:10:00,933 --> 00:10:03,060 Can we make that 6:30? Wonderful. 217 00:10:03,144 --> 00:10:05,688 Hold on. Does she like French food? 218 00:10:06,772 --> 00:10:08,065 I'll call you back. 219 00:10:10,026 --> 00:10:11,402 Anyway, Commander Data-- 220 00:10:11,485 --> 00:10:12,653 Let me ask you a question. 221 00:10:12,737 --> 00:10:15,531 If Commander Data were taking your Meemaw out for dinner, 222 00:10:15,615 --> 00:10:16,616 where would they go? 223 00:10:16,699 --> 00:10:18,284 Almost certainly the Holodeck. 224 00:10:19,201 --> 00:10:21,537 Sounds trendy, is that in Houston? 225 00:10:25,499 --> 00:10:26,375 Hello. 226 00:10:26,876 --> 00:10:27,752 What's up? 227 00:10:27,960 --> 00:10:29,587 I saw your "help wanted" sign. 228 00:10:29,670 --> 00:10:30,796 I'd like to help, please. 229 00:10:30,880 --> 00:10:31,964 How old are you? 230 00:10:32,131 --> 00:10:33,591 How old do I need to be? 231 00:10:33,674 --> 00:10:34,675 Fourteen. 232 00:10:34,759 --> 00:10:36,719 [scoffs] Do I not look 14? 233 00:10:37,428 --> 00:10:38,387 I don't care. 234 00:10:38,471 --> 00:10:40,264 Perfect. So, when do I start? 235 00:10:40,348 --> 00:10:41,682 All right, hold on. 236 00:10:41,766 --> 00:10:43,893 -Do you even like comic books? -Yeah. 237 00:10:43,976 --> 00:10:44,852 What's your favorite? 238 00:10:46,354 --> 00:10:47,229 Um… 239 00:10:47,730 --> 00:10:50,775 The cool thing about X-Men is not that they have superpowers, 240 00:10:50,858 --> 00:10:52,485 but they're a metaphor for outsiders… 241 00:10:52,568 --> 00:10:54,945 …outsiders trying to find their place in society. 242 00:10:55,488 --> 00:10:56,530 Who's your favorite? 243 00:10:57,114 --> 00:10:57,948 All of them. 244 00:10:59,492 --> 00:11:00,326 Mine too. 245 00:11:00,409 --> 00:11:01,827 And I got the job. 246 00:11:01,911 --> 00:11:03,412 You can't work at that store. 247 00:11:03,496 --> 00:11:05,665 If anyone should work there, it should be me. 248 00:11:05,748 --> 00:11:07,124 Sorry, we're not hiring. 249 00:11:07,208 --> 00:11:08,626 Do I at least get a discount? 250 00:11:08,709 --> 00:11:09,585 I do. 251 00:11:11,879 --> 00:11:13,089 [Mary sobbing] 252 00:11:17,802 --> 00:11:19,011 Oh, hey, hi. 253 00:11:19,095 --> 00:11:20,179 [sniffles] 254 00:11:21,013 --> 00:11:21,847 You okay? 255 00:11:23,224 --> 00:11:24,558 Not really. 256 00:11:24,642 --> 00:11:27,520 It's been a rough couple of days. 257 00:11:28,479 --> 00:11:29,313 I'm sorry. 258 00:11:29,522 --> 00:11:30,564 Thank you. 259 00:11:30,940 --> 00:11:33,484 If it makes you feel better, I've had a good couple of days 260 00:11:33,567 --> 00:11:34,944 and I'm still gonna get drunk. 261 00:11:35,027 --> 00:11:36,404 [both chuckle] 262 00:11:37,238 --> 00:11:38,155 Wanna join me? 263 00:11:39,990 --> 00:11:42,743 Yes. That would be nice. 264 00:11:43,327 --> 00:11:45,496 More sad than nice, but let's go. 265 00:11:45,579 --> 00:11:46,747 Okay. 266 00:11:49,500 --> 00:11:52,211 So, this is unexpected. 267 00:11:52,962 --> 00:11:54,213 I know you like margaritas, 268 00:11:54,296 --> 00:11:56,465 so my first thought was a Mexican restaurant. 269 00:11:56,549 --> 00:11:57,508 Good thought. 270 00:11:57,591 --> 00:12:00,261 But I assumed other men had come to that same conclusion. 271 00:12:00,344 --> 00:12:01,220 They have. 272 00:12:01,303 --> 00:12:03,389 Which led me to Polynesian fare. 273 00:12:03,472 --> 00:12:07,518 I like to think of the Mai Tai as the margarita of the South Pacific. 274 00:12:08,769 --> 00:12:10,896 You don't do anything on a whim, do you? 275 00:12:11,480 --> 00:12:12,565 Did once, didn't like it. 276 00:12:13,899 --> 00:12:15,443 [indistinct chatter on TV] 277 00:12:16,152 --> 00:12:19,196 I have an idea for a Star Trek episode I'd like to present to you. 278 00:12:19,864 --> 00:12:20,698 Why me? 279 00:12:20,906 --> 00:12:24,076 Because I'm hoping to sell it, and since it's broadcast television, 280 00:12:24,160 --> 00:12:26,287 I wanna make sure the common man understands it. 281 00:12:27,121 --> 00:12:28,789 Yeah, I understand I was insulted. 282 00:12:28,873 --> 00:12:31,000 Excellent, I came to the right common man. 283 00:12:31,625 --> 00:12:34,962 We start on a gas giant in the vicinity of Rigel IV, 284 00:12:35,045 --> 00:12:39,425 then see a shuttlecraft, a dot of silver against the inky blackness of space. 285 00:12:39,508 --> 00:12:43,596 Inside the shuttlecraft we see Lieutenant Worf struggling to breathe. 286 00:12:43,679 --> 00:12:46,849 He's been infected by a vicious, intelligent fungus. 287 00:12:46,932 --> 00:12:48,809 -Where are you going? -I'm listening. 288 00:12:48,893 --> 00:12:51,854 Cough! Cough! Worf is choking on spores. 289 00:12:51,937 --> 00:12:53,647 But not just your everyday spores, 290 00:12:53,731 --> 00:12:55,900 these are spores with their own evil agenda. 291 00:12:55,983 --> 00:12:56,817 [laughs] 292 00:12:56,901 --> 00:13:00,237 As he sinks into a coma, a mysterious figure approaches. 293 00:13:00,321 --> 00:13:03,407 He lowers the visor of his helmet revealing… Future Worf! 294 00:13:03,491 --> 00:13:05,117 -Are you hooked? -Oh, yeah. 295 00:13:06,327 --> 00:13:08,037 Main titles. Cue theme song 296 00:13:08,120 --> 00:13:11,499 and the soothing voice of Patrick Stewart as Captain Picard says… 297 00:13:13,292 --> 00:13:14,126 "Space, 298 00:13:16,837 --> 00:13:18,088 the final frontier." 299 00:13:19,340 --> 00:13:20,508 Who's Patrick Stewart? 300 00:13:23,427 --> 00:13:25,554 -Feeling better? -I'm fine. 301 00:13:25,638 --> 00:13:27,598 Just having a little moment earlier. 302 00:13:27,723 --> 00:13:29,808 Oh, yeah. All right. 303 00:13:29,892 --> 00:13:31,143 [country music playing] 304 00:13:31,227 --> 00:13:32,478 Mm. 305 00:13:35,606 --> 00:13:39,818 Seems like running into Pastor Rob kind of rattled you a little bit. 306 00:13:39,985 --> 00:13:41,820 Oh, well… 307 00:13:43,739 --> 00:13:47,743 I was asked to leave the church and he's still there, so… 308 00:13:48,327 --> 00:13:49,828 It's still a little fresh. 309 00:13:50,037 --> 00:13:51,664 Mm. I get that. 310 00:13:52,831 --> 00:13:54,291 Seems like a nice guy though. 311 00:13:54,375 --> 00:13:56,335 Oh, yeah, he's great. 312 00:13:56,502 --> 00:13:58,045 Cute as a button. 313 00:13:58,629 --> 00:14:02,341 I guess. I prefer a bigger man. 314 00:14:03,425 --> 00:14:04,301 Like George? 315 00:14:05,219 --> 00:14:06,929 Oh, yeah. Bigger the better. 316 00:14:08,931 --> 00:14:11,809 Deep within the Enterprise's control room, Future Worf says, 317 00:14:11,892 --> 00:14:14,728 "I willingly sacrifice myself for the good of this mission," 318 00:14:14,812 --> 00:14:18,274 then throws himself into the warp core. There's an explosion of tachyons. 319 00:14:18,357 --> 00:14:21,151 The Enterprise blasts free of the gigantic field of fungus. 320 00:14:21,735 --> 00:14:25,823 -Fade out. Written by: Sheldon Lee Cooper. -[toilet flushing] 321 00:14:27,241 --> 00:14:28,409 What do you think? 322 00:14:29,994 --> 00:14:32,621 If this Worf fella was infected on the shuttle, 323 00:14:33,122 --> 00:14:35,916 why would he come back and put everyone else in danger? 324 00:14:36,834 --> 00:14:37,877 Well… 325 00:14:39,461 --> 00:14:41,922 [adult Sheldon] My father found a flaw in my story, 326 00:14:42,006 --> 00:14:44,091 my sister had a job I envied, 327 00:14:44,174 --> 00:14:46,135 it was a big day for the common man. 328 00:14:46,677 --> 00:14:48,512 But then I had an idea, 329 00:14:48,596 --> 00:14:51,098 that like Future Worf, was ahead of its time. 330 00:14:51,181 --> 00:14:52,141 [knock at door] 331 00:14:52,224 --> 00:14:53,684 -[Sheldon] Missy. -What? 332 00:14:54,810 --> 00:14:56,395 Why is a dollar worth a dollar? 333 00:14:56,645 --> 00:14:57,730 Sheldon, I'm busy. 334 00:14:57,813 --> 00:15:00,107 Me too. I've solved all of our money problems. 335 00:15:00,190 --> 00:15:02,151 I'm going to invent a digital currency. 336 00:15:02,234 --> 00:15:03,694 Like printing your own? 337 00:15:03,777 --> 00:15:06,488 No. First, we assign value to difficult-to-find numbers 338 00:15:06,572 --> 00:15:07,906 and store them in a database. 339 00:15:07,990 --> 00:15:10,159 Then we create an algorithm to mine numbers, 340 00:15:10,242 --> 00:15:11,785 then we get people to switch 341 00:15:11,869 --> 00:15:13,621 from government currencies to ours. 342 00:15:14,705 --> 00:15:16,415 It's brilliant. I'm going to be rich. 343 00:15:17,207 --> 00:15:21,295 Speaking of, did you know Batman is also secretly a rich dude? 344 00:15:21,378 --> 00:15:25,007 Or he lives in a rich dude's basement. I'm still figuring it out. 345 00:15:25,090 --> 00:15:26,133 [sighs] 346 00:15:29,386 --> 00:15:31,263 Oh, thank you, tiki woman. 347 00:15:31,347 --> 00:15:34,058 So, what's going on at work? 348 00:15:34,141 --> 00:15:35,768 I don't wanna bore you. 349 00:15:35,851 --> 00:15:37,144 No, no, I'm interested. 350 00:15:37,227 --> 00:15:38,228 Excellent. 351 00:15:38,312 --> 00:15:39,605 We're racing the Finnish team 352 00:15:39,688 --> 00:15:42,399 to see if we can correct unification of the leptons. 353 00:15:42,483 --> 00:15:45,235 As you can imagine, the world waits anxiously 354 00:15:45,319 --> 00:15:47,404 to see who crosses the finish line first. 355 00:15:47,488 --> 00:15:49,573 So the Finnish may be at the finish line? 356 00:15:49,657 --> 00:15:50,991 [wheezy laughter] 357 00:15:53,327 --> 00:15:54,745 Oh, you're witty too. 358 00:15:55,245 --> 00:15:56,872 More cheese to bait the trap. 359 00:15:57,748 --> 00:15:59,208 Maybe we should order dinner. 360 00:15:59,291 --> 00:16:01,460 Nonsense. There's food right here. 361 00:16:01,543 --> 00:16:07,424 Pineapple. Prickly on the outside but beautiful inside, just like you. 362 00:16:12,221 --> 00:16:14,056 And you know, that Shannon girl. 363 00:16:14,139 --> 00:16:17,601 -With Pastor Rob? -She was a bedwetter! 364 00:16:19,144 --> 00:16:21,021 Ten years old. That's not normal. 365 00:16:21,105 --> 00:16:23,816 Maybe he'll get a fun little surprise on their honeymoon. 366 00:16:24,358 --> 00:16:26,610 Oh, no, they're not getting married. 367 00:16:26,694 --> 00:16:27,695 How do you know? 368 00:16:28,445 --> 00:16:31,156 I don't. I just think he can do better. 369 00:16:32,282 --> 00:16:36,537 Mary Cooper, are you sweet on him? 370 00:16:36,620 --> 00:16:38,455 No! What? 371 00:16:38,539 --> 00:16:40,624 I am a married woman. 372 00:16:41,417 --> 00:16:42,835 Happily. 373 00:16:42,918 --> 00:16:45,212 I was married once. Didn't stop me from looking. 374 00:16:45,295 --> 00:16:46,964 Well, I'm not looking. 375 00:16:47,047 --> 00:16:48,590 [country song playing] 376 00:16:48,674 --> 00:16:50,426 -Where you going? -To dance. 377 00:16:50,509 --> 00:16:52,344 I didn't think you Baptists did that. 378 00:16:52,428 --> 00:16:53,721 We don't drink either. 379 00:16:53,804 --> 00:16:54,805 Oh! 380 00:16:55,556 --> 00:16:56,473 Look at me. 381 00:16:57,307 --> 00:16:58,684 [Mary giggling] 382 00:16:59,476 --> 00:17:01,145 I'm pretty good. 383 00:17:01,228 --> 00:17:04,189 Are you familiar with, "You need money to make money"? 384 00:17:04,398 --> 00:17:06,400 -No. -Well, it's a phrase. 385 00:17:06,483 --> 00:17:10,029 My clever twist on it is, "I'm going to make money to make money." 386 00:17:10,112 --> 00:17:11,030 Uh-huh. 387 00:17:11,113 --> 00:17:12,573 Now when I say, "make money," 388 00:17:12,656 --> 00:17:14,491 you'd think it's about counterfeiting. 389 00:17:14,575 --> 00:17:18,120 But no, I'm talking about creating a unique decentralized digital currency 390 00:17:18,203 --> 00:17:19,455 people can pay to own. 391 00:17:19,538 --> 00:17:20,622 Sounds like a scam. 392 00:17:20,706 --> 00:17:24,710 No, it's an open-source currency that has value due to mathematical scarcity. 393 00:17:25,252 --> 00:17:26,378 Sounds pretty scammy. 394 00:17:26,462 --> 00:17:27,671 [sighs] You don't understand. 395 00:17:27,755 --> 00:17:28,797 I do. 396 00:17:28,881 --> 00:17:30,799 You say a bunch of fancy jibber-jabber, 397 00:17:30,883 --> 00:17:32,968 people don't admit they're too stupid, 398 00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:34,094 then they give you money. 399 00:17:34,178 --> 00:17:36,805 Well, um, sort of. 400 00:17:37,556 --> 00:17:39,516 Love it. How do we get started? 401 00:17:39,600 --> 00:17:41,727 Well, all we need is a mainframe computer. 402 00:17:41,810 --> 00:17:42,686 How much is that? 403 00:17:42,770 --> 00:17:44,521 New, about a half a million dollars, 404 00:17:44,605 --> 00:17:46,815 but I'm hoping to find something slightly used. 405 00:17:47,775 --> 00:17:49,193 Time will prove me right! 406 00:17:51,945 --> 00:17:54,448 You won't believe this, but I don't go on dates. 407 00:17:54,531 --> 00:17:55,699 No. 408 00:17:56,784 --> 00:17:57,618 It's true. 409 00:17:57,701 --> 00:18:00,913 Sure I did okay as a younger man, but there was a war on 410 00:18:00,996 --> 00:18:03,040 and most of the men were elsewhere. 411 00:18:03,749 --> 00:18:05,209 So you sowed oats, I get it. 412 00:18:05,292 --> 00:18:06,585 A whole field of them. 413 00:18:06,668 --> 00:18:08,378 I was the Johnny Appleseed of oats. 414 00:18:08,462 --> 00:18:09,505 Okay. 415 00:18:10,047 --> 00:18:11,215 But here's the thing, 416 00:18:11,924 --> 00:18:14,843 once you put off matrimony past a certain point, 417 00:18:14,927 --> 00:18:17,638 women start to think of you as… What's the word? 418 00:18:17,930 --> 00:18:19,640 -Creepy? -There it is. 419 00:18:20,349 --> 00:18:21,683 And then along comes you. 420 00:18:21,850 --> 00:18:26,480 My little Texas firecracker, playing the game of life by her own set of rules. 421 00:18:26,647 --> 00:18:29,024 I'm a firecracker, I'm a pineapple. 422 00:18:29,775 --> 00:18:31,026 Good for me. 423 00:18:31,318 --> 00:18:32,820 Can I ask you a personal question? 424 00:18:32,903 --> 00:18:33,946 I wish you wouldn't. 425 00:18:34,029 --> 00:18:36,448 How would you like to make love to a man 426 00:18:36,532 --> 00:18:38,450 who shook the hand of Albert Einstein? 427 00:18:38,534 --> 00:18:40,160 And you did. 428 00:18:40,410 --> 00:18:41,912 This one right here. 429 00:18:42,412 --> 00:18:43,622 I didn't wash for a week. 430 00:18:43,705 --> 00:18:45,040 Not a selling point. 431 00:18:46,917 --> 00:18:48,293 Excuse me for a moment. 432 00:18:49,711 --> 00:18:51,588 I have to toss my cookies. 433 00:18:55,342 --> 00:18:56,593 [door shuts] 434 00:18:57,177 --> 00:18:58,887 Hey, where have you been? 435 00:18:59,596 --> 00:19:02,474 Brenda and I went dancing. 436 00:19:02,724 --> 00:19:04,226 You went dancing? 437 00:19:04,434 --> 00:19:07,146 Yeah, and I'm darn good at it. 438 00:19:07,229 --> 00:19:08,522 [chuckles] Okay. 439 00:19:09,731 --> 00:19:11,692 -The kids asleep? -Yep. 440 00:19:13,068 --> 00:19:15,237 You wanna fool around? 441 00:19:17,239 --> 00:19:19,616 -Are you messing with me? -I'm hoping to. 442 00:19:21,702 --> 00:19:23,120 Well, hot diggity dog. 443 00:19:27,749 --> 00:19:30,002 Welcome to King Kong Comics. I'm Missy. 444 00:19:30,085 --> 00:19:31,670 If you have questions, let me know. 445 00:19:31,753 --> 00:19:32,921 I don't have questions. 446 00:19:33,005 --> 00:19:34,715 I know more about this than you do. 447 00:19:34,798 --> 00:19:38,302 Okay. What you may not know is the new Green Lantern just came in. 448 00:19:39,469 --> 00:19:40,762 If you like green things, 449 00:19:40,846 --> 00:19:42,764 I recommend Green Arrow, and The Hulk. 450 00:19:42,848 --> 00:19:43,765 His skin is green. 451 00:19:43,849 --> 00:19:45,517 I know that. Everyone knows that. 452 00:19:45,601 --> 00:19:47,686 Uh-oh. Are you gonna smash things? 453 00:19:47,769 --> 00:19:49,605 That's what the Hulk does when he's upset. 454 00:19:49,688 --> 00:19:50,689 I'm not upset. 455 00:19:51,231 --> 00:19:53,734 Cool. If you need anything, I'll be at the counter. 456 00:19:53,817 --> 00:19:54,860 Where I work. 457 00:20:01,074 --> 00:20:02,618 [theme music playing] hing, I'll be at the counter.