-[narrator] Previously on Riverdale: -I just have to ask.
When you were pretending to be with Betty,
you didn't feel anything, did you?
[Archie] I can't stop thinking about you, Betty.
I've tried, but it's impossible.
I wanted to share something. A song I wrote for you.
Stop. Whatever this is, it's just over.
Hey, Mom? I'm ready to get serious about the Naval Academy.
[Veronica] He's dying, Archie.
And I don't know what to do.
[Betty] What is this?
[Jughead] Footage of our houses being watched from across the street.
For hours upon hours.
-[FP] Maybe it's a prank. -[Jughead] This is an escalation.
It's a warning.
Or a promise of violence to come.
This was on our doorstep.
-Maybe it's a copycat? -[Jughead] I've seen this place before.
[Jughead] Oh, my God.
Are they stabbing Mr. Honey?
Hey, did you reach out to Mr. Honey?
We did. He's fine. No one's tried to kill him.
-Well, for now at least. -In the meantime,
-mind breaking this down for me? -It's the auteur again.
They've moved on from recreating a killing to reenacting a metaphoric murder.
Us and friends getting Mr. Honey fired.
And there is one other thing:
I wrote a story called "Killing Mr. Honey,"
within which was a fictionalized version of this cabin.
-I don't think that's a coincidence. -All right. Uh...
Who else knew about that story?
-Just us. Me and Betty. -Yeah.
Unless I'm being watched or hacked.
This is interesting.
-[Charles] It's four ticket stubs. -[Betty] For, like, the movie theater?
Admission to watch the tapes?
Stubs have the letters B and V on them.
-What the hell? Like Betty and Veronica? -No. Blue Velvet.
Like Blue Velvet Video.
The place that all roads keep coming back to.
That video store and that crypt keeper, David.
If he's not the auteur, he's connected somehow.
-Or at least a fan. -We'll bring him in.
I'll call you in the morning. Get some rest.
Okay. Good night.
[door opens]
Early morning run, Archiekins?
Physical for the Naval Academy this week.
I find it hard to believe they wouldn't be impressed
by my teenage Thor.
You could always serve your country in the USO.
-What are you talking about? -Oh, nothing.
Just this new song you've written.
-Oh. -Mm-hm.
That is... nothing. Just something I'm kicking around.
Play it for me?
No. Ronnie. I stink.
And so does this song. Trust me.
Okay. I do like the idea of you getting back into music though.
Right now my focus is on impressing the commandant.
And you will. Because I'll be there to make sure of it.
[cell phone buzzes]
It's Daddy. He wants me home for breakfast.
That's too bad.
I was gonna ask you if you wanted to join me in the shower.
Hey. There you are. Come, sit. Join us.
I have news.
Please don't tell me you and Mom are chaperoning prom.
We are. But no.
My news is, according to my doctor, my core strength is building back up.
In fact, my grip is almost as strong as it was pre-diagnosis.
-What are you saying? -I'm beating it.
-I'm beating this damn disease. -That's incredible.
It is, assuming it's true.
Forgive me if I call your doctor
to confirm that this isn't another one of your stories.
Fine.
-[phone dialing] -Does he know why you're bouncing back?
I've been trying this new workout regimen that's helping.
[intense music playing]
[siren wailing in distance]
Thank you, doctor. TTFN.
Well, it seems to be true.
This calls for a celebration.
Cheers.
[all speak in Spanish]
[inaudible dialogue]
Ah. He's not talking. Unless you count movie quotes.
What did he say about his store's initials on those tickets?
-Never seen them before in his life. -[scoffs] Right.
I don't know if this creep is responsible for making the videos,
but I can't shake the feeling that he is profiting off them.
Same.
-Where's your partner-in-crime? -Following up on another lead.
What exactly are you accusing me of, young lady?
I'm not accusing. I'm asking.
If I made a videotape of you and your classmates
murdering poor Mr. Honey?
Things haven't changed much, I see.
-Mr. Weatherbee, you're back. -Indeed.
In time for senior prom and graduation.
How--? How are you?
I told Edgar I wasn't the mole. He cut it off.
I make it through most nights without waking up screaming.
Two businesses? Another besides this community center?
Yes, commandant.
Archie is also the owner of Andrews Construction,
a business he inherited after his father's passing.
Well, I have to say, I am truly impressed by you, Mr. Andrews.
-Thank you. -However,
when it seemed like you were no longer interested,
I started looking at other candidates.
Someone else you're considering?
Yes, a young man from Queens,
who's been training rigorously for the Academy.
He's also a boxer like I was.
As you know, we have a proud boxing tradition in the Navy.
I'm looking for a champion.
Crazy idea: If you're considering Archie and someone else,
how about deciding with an exhibition bout?
Right here at the El Royale.
I do feel that Archie and this young man are otherwise evenly matched.
Okay. I'll have my office reach out to KO Kelly,
see how quickly he can hop a train to Riverdale.
Wait a minute. KO Kelly is your other candidate?
Yes, why? You know him?
Um... Yes. He's only dating one of my BFFs, Katy Keene.
Well, Miss Bell was a bust.
Charles isn't having much luck with the video store's owner either.
I do have an idea of someone we could talk to
who might be able to give us dirt.
The only caveat being he's tried to kill me.
[school bell rings]
Our momentous day is almost upon us, Tee-Tee.
Can I ask, why do you wanna be prom queen so badly?
"Want," Tee-Tee?
Does Elizabeth want to be the queen of England?
A better question is, why don't you wanna be prom queen?
Listen.
If it's important to you, it's important to me.
But the only royalty I care about is being Serpent Queen.
Which I will be. Again.
-You'll see. -Hey, Cheryl. Toni.
Is this where I sign up to run for prom person?
Oh, no, Kev. I don't think you wanna do that.
No, I don't, actually.
But Fangs has always wanted to be prom king, so...
-here we are. -I hate to rain on Fangs's parade,
but Toni and I are campaigning to be co-queens,
and it has been my destiny since birth.
I have spent my entire life fantasizing about being prom queen.
A part of that is I exist in a world
where everyone wants me to be prom queen and certainly not themselves.
Make sense?
Yeah. Yeah.
Thank you. As my friend, I knew you'd understand.
Whatever happens with your fight,
I've booked us the presidential suite at the Five Seasons for our...
après-prom rendezvous.
It'll be just you, me, a bathtub full of rose petals, and...
-[bell jingles] -KO Kelly!
Ronnie. [chuckles]
-Hi. -Hey.
Welcome to Riverdale. KO, this is Archie Andrews.
-Archie, this is KO Kelly. -Ah.
So, you're my competition.
No offense, but are we in the same weight class?
-I'm bigger than I look, bro. -Boys, boys.
Save the sparring for the ring.
I promised Katy I'd show KO a good time.
Yeah, I'm down. But first, know where I can drop my stuff?
As a matter of fact, I do. Archie has graciously agreed
to have you stay with him and train at his gym.
-I'm heading there now if you need a ride. -All right. Play nice.
[Bret] Well, well, well... Never thought I'd see you two again.
What brings you around?
Look, Bret. We know you sold your sex tapes to Blue Velvet Video.
The owner, David, keeps coming up in an investigation we're conducting,
but he's not talking to us. We need a way in.
We need leverage.
Yeah. I know David. But if he's not talking, why should I?
See, I have a friend in there with you. His name is War Baby.
Mm-hm. Know who he hates more than anyone?
Preppies.
What's the investigation?
Someone is making videos of us and our friends
doing disturbing, violent things.
We think this David is connected to them.
Did he mention or host screenings with the videos in stock?
Some of David's customers prefer shared experiences.
Underground, immersive, red-band screenings.
If we wanted to attend one, what would we do?
Be on a list.
Or you'd have to...
prove to David that you're the real deal.
Bring him a tape.
Something to make him sit up and take notice.
Say, a snuff film.
Holy moly.
That guy's gotta have 50 pounds on you.
Yeah, no joke.
What am I gonna do, Mr. Keller?
-He's gonna cream me tomorrow. -Well...
Honestly, a little psychological warfare might be your best bet.
You're smaller, but I bet you're stronger.
Let's show him.
-Got a mean left hook on you. -Thanks.
Been punching bags since I was a baby.
I promised Ronnie no betting on our actual match,
but how about you and me make a little side bet.
That, pound for pound, I'm stronger than you are.
[intense music playing]
-Unless you're too scared. -[snickers]
[Keller] Twenty. Twenty-one.
Twenty-seven.
Twenty-eight. Twenty-nine.
Ninety-one.
Ninety-two.
Ninety-three.
One twenty-two, 123, 124.
-One twenty-nine. -[KO grunts]
-One thirty. -[groans]
One thirty-one.
[KO] Okay, I'll admit it,
you got more endurance.
When it comes to brute power, we'll see who's stronger:
The Heavyweight Heartbreaker or the Red Hope.
Yeah, we will.
-And tomorrow, your ass is grass. -[snickers]
But tonight, Ronnie wants us to show you a good time,
so we're going to her speakeasy.
Her what?
This is Riverdale, but where do we get a snuff film
in which someone gets murdered on-screen?
Those are urban legends, I thought.
Not according to Nicolas Cage movies. I mean, we can make one.
-A snuff film? -Well, a facsimile of one.
Just convincing enough for David to let his guard down.
Borrow equipment from the AV Club.
Jellybean still has that fake blood from Halloween.
-Who's our murderer? Who's our victim? -We just need a brute and a scream queen.
No. I won't help you.
No, no, Cheryl. It's not an actual snuff film.
It's an act.
A way to get closer to the auteur,
the person creating those reenactment videos,
including the one with Jason and your father.
I do want to expose that defiler.
-What's this movie about? -It's a classic tale.
One as old as time. A girl meets a boy.
Boy promises to make girl a star and...
then the boy kills the girl.
Charming.
Okay. But I'll need a wig.
Don't want anyone to recognize me by my red mane.
Okay.
Well? How do I look?
-Oh, my God. You look incredible. -What about me?
Terrifying, Reg.
-What happens next, Mr. De Palma? -Yes!
Now, Reggie is going to kill you in the most brutally exploitative way,
and I am going to film the hell out of it.
[indistinct chatter]
[Veronica speaks in French]
Is everyone having a good time tonight?
Excellent.
In honor of my friend KO's visit,
I thought I'd share a little tune for you tonight.
Written by someone very special to me.
This one's for you, Archiekins.
[band playing ballad]
♪ There's no warning When everything changes ♪
♪ You let down your guard And I saw something strange ♪
♪ I thought He's not made for this world ♪
♪ And neither am I ♪
♪ 'Cause you make me ♪
♪ Wanna be stronger than I am ♪
♪ And maybe I'm reaching Misplacing a feeling ♪
♪ There's no way to know but to try ♪
♪ So, give me tonight ♪
♪ Tonight ♪
All right. Now, it's straight to bed, my burly boys.
Big day tomorrow. KO?
Please tell Katy that I'm sorry she's not gonna be here
when my boyfriend beats up her boyfriend.
-I'll let her know. -[Veronica chuckles]
Good night.
-Good night. -Wait!
Yeah?
I love you.
I love you, too.
I have a proposal I'd like to share.
Host a din-din before the dance.
I'm down. Who should we invite?
Mmm. The Vixens, Kevin, Fangs--
I was thinking...
our families. Specifically yours, my love.
[dramatic music playing]
Even though I'm out to my grandparents, mm,
I'm their favorite grandchild.
I don't think they could handle some big, gay, prom dinner party.
Well...
What happens when I meet them at graduation?
Do I just pretend like you're not my girlfriend?
Honestly, that's probably a good idea.
Tee-Tee, you can't be serious.
I know it's crazy and backwards,
but that's my reality, babe.
Hey, I'm curious, Archie.
What made you seek out the Naval Academy?
Well, all my friends applied to college.
I missed the boat on that.
And I got a second chance with the commandant.
And the Academy...
feels like it could be a good place to start over.
Completely.
Ah. Not completely.
You and Ronnie are in it to win it, Katy says.
[dramatic music playing]
I don't know. Sometimes I worry that I'm holding her back.
I feel you.
But that is for the ladies to decide.
Not lugs like us.
We lucked out.
Night, bro.
[school bell rings]
-[Kevin] Hey, guys. -Hey, Kev.
We have a favor to ask.
We're trying to sell a snuff film to this video store, but...
I can't go in there, the owner's gonna recognize me
from the time I raided the place with the FBI.
But I don't want Betty to go in alone.
-You had me at "snuff film." -[Betty] Thank you.
Just have to stop by my house. I need to grab a backup.
Just in case.
I need to talk to you, Nana.
I'm really hoping you'll keep an open mind.
I think I know what this is about.
Your girlfriend stopped by, Antoinette.
My girlfriend did? What?
When were you gonna tell me that you were dating a Blossom?
Nana, it's not what you think.
Cheryl isn't what you think.
That family, over the decades, has taken everything from us.
-And from our people. -That's ancient history.
I promise you, Cheryl is nothing like her family.
If that's true, then why have you kept her hidden like a dirty secret?
Because you know it's wrong--
No, it's because I knew this would be your reaction.
About this? Yes.
I will not allow you to date a Blossom.
You look familiar to me. Both of you do.
You come in here before?
-Nope. Never. Shockingly. -[Betty] Mm-mm.
A classmate of mine from prep school said that you buy videos.
Underground videos.
My friend and I saw this video at a party last weekend--
And we boosted it.
It's of a girl getting killed. For real.
A snuff film.
Let me take a look.
[whimpering over TV]
[Cheryl screaming over TV]
[Reggie grunting over TV]
-Sorry, kids. -[videotape stops]
You were conned. Or you're trying to con me.
But this snuff is a fake.
We were worried that this tape might not be authentic,
so I brought a backup that I know for a fact is the real deal.
[suspenseful music playing]
[woman] I'm making this movie so we never forget
what your daddy sacrificed for us.
You do love your daddy, don't you, Harold?
-[young Hal] Yes, Mom. -What is this?
[woman] Want your daddy to keep living with us?
-The birth of a serial killer. -[young Hal] Yes, Mom.
-The Black Hood. As a little boy. -Is that really him?
-The Black Hood? -Yeah.
-That's my dad. -[woman] And what happens to sinners?
-This is insane. -Could I screen this at a little...
film festival-slash-rave I'm organizing?
...they're gonna ask who killed his family.
Yeah. As long as we're invited to the screening.
...but not Daddy, because we don't want Daddy
-to be taken away from us, do we? -[young Hal] No.
[woman] But you? You will do better.
You must do better.
[cheers and applause]
Go, Archie!
Archie!
Attaboy. Go get him, Arch.
[intense music playing]
Welcome to the Film Society, girlie.
We got your daddy's movie playing in Room 317.
[dance music playing over speakers]
-Box. -[bell dings]
Welcome to the Film Society.
-My dad's playing in Room 317, apparently. -Awesome.
So, what are we supposed to be looking for?
See if any of the auteur's movies are playing.
Or if any of these people are fans.
Maybe just get a lay of the land first.
[laughing over speakers]
Oh!
[woman] ...saw kill his family, make sure he doesn't say Daddy.
Can you do that, Harold? Convince him?
You're a good boy, Hal. Your father let him escape. But you?
You will do better. You must do better.
-[Jughead] Betty. -Yeah.
[bell dings]
[crowd gasping]
[whimpers]
-[bell dings] -Box.
[man] Psychosis is the loss of contact with external reality,
a severe mental disorder in which thoughts...
-These are all the auteur's films. -Then he's gotta be in here.
[woman screaming over speakers]
Do you know who the director of this is?
Do you know who the director--?
You the director?
-[Betty] Hey! -Oh, no. It's just I'm such a big fan.
-See if I can get an autograph. -Ponytail Playmate. Hotter in person.
Hey! Jug, we're leaving. We're leaving.
Go, go, go.
[bell dings]
[Keller] Attaboy. Give me two big breaths.
Jug, look.
Oh, that's him. That's gotta be him.
Come on, Arch!
-[Jughead] Jellybean? -Jughead?
Betty, go. Let me stay with Jellybean. Go. After him.
-What are you doing here? -No, why are you?
My friends and I heard there was a party.
-Am I in trouble? -No. You're not. Let's go.
[bell dinging]
Stop, stop, stop.
Fight's over.
[cheers and applause]
Ladies and gentlemen, the first judge has scored the fight in favor of KO Kelly.
[scattered applause]
Our second judge has scored the fight for Archie Andrews.
[cheers and applause]
And our third judge, the commandant...
[suspenseful music playing]
...has scored the fight in favor
of KO Kelly, your winner tonight.
[scattered applause]
[all murmuring]
You're a hell of a fighter, Archie. I'll tell you what.
Why don't we stay in touch, and come fall, when you reapply to the Academy,
-we'll see if we can make it happen. -No, thanks. I'm good.
Archie. Don't be disrespectful.
Your blood's still boiling. I understand, son.
I'm not your son. And I'm not applying again.
-Cheryl, what the hell did you do? -What the hell indeed.
I thought you didn't want me to meet your nana because I'm a lesbian.
But, surprise, it's me and my family she hates with a fiery vengeance.
Admit that your ancestors were horrible to mine.
Now my nana is begging me not to go to prom with you.
She says it would dishonor our family.
Look.
I'm truly, truly sorry I went to see your nana,
but I hope we're still going to prom together.
I hope that when I'm posing for pictures in my amazing dress...
that you're there with me, looking equally undeniable.
How did you even know where to go?
My friend Lauren from soccer, her older brother heard about a rave.
-From who? -I don't know. Some e-mail list.
Jug, I swear, I've never been to a rave before.
Promise me you're not gonna go to anymore X-rated raves from now on?
Especially if I end up in the University of Iowa. Okay?
-Yes. -Do you promise me?
I promise.
Archie.
I'm sorry about the fight.
I wish I hadn't suggested it.
And I know this sucks right now, but...
the Naval Academy wasn't your only option.
-Yeah, it kind of was, Ronnie. -Hey.
Listen.
Wanna blow off prom?
[tender music playing]
We could do something. Anything you want.
-Just the two of us. -No.
This will be the last dance we have with our friends.
Can't miss it.
Are you sure, Archie?
I'm in.
[tender music playing]
I still wanna take a picture of you, dear.
You look like an angel.
Thank you, Nana.
Perhaps your camera will capture the sublime tragedy of my life.
-Okay. -Don't start crying yet, Cheryl.
Toni. You came.
Was there ever any doubt?
Ready?
Oh, that's nice.
-[Hiram] Looking sharp, Archie. -Thank you, sir.
Veronica told me about the Naval Academy.
-Unlucky break. -It wasn't meant to be.
Well, look. Um...
If you decide to stay in Riverdale,
I'm in need of a deputy mayor to oversee community outreach.
I think you'd be perfect for it.
Well, Archiekins, what do you think?
Am I dazzling?
-Wow. -[chuckles]
Okay, you two. Snuggle up for a picture.
This is a memory you're going to treasure forever.
Smile and say, "Endgame." Three, two, one.
Damn, boy. You are handsome.
Like father, like son.
-Oh, my gosh. Betty. -[FP chuckles]
[tender music playing]
Betty Cooper, you take my breath away.
Jughead Jones.
The feeling's mutual.
Okay. Picture time.
Smile.
["Kiss Me" playing]
♪ Kiss me Out of the bearded barley ♪
♪ Nightly Beside the green, green grass ♪
♪ Swing, swing ♪
♪ Swing the spinning step ♪
♪ You wear those shoes And I will wear that dress ♪
♪ Oh, kiss me Beneath the milky twilight ♪
["Closer to Free" playing over speakers]
♪ Everybody two ♪
♪ Everybody free ♪
♪ Everybody wants to live ♪
♪ Like they wanna live ♪
♪ And everybody wants to love ♪
♪ Like they wanna love ♪
♪ And everybody wants to be ♪
-♪ Closer to free ♪ -I'd like to propose a toast.
To surviving this crazy town
and making it a night that we'll never forget. Whoo!
[all] Cheers!
["The World I Know" playing over speakers]
[inaudible dialogue]
♪ Has our conscience shown? ♪
Happy prom night, lover.
Did you and Daddy have a nice chat?
Did you know he was gonna ask me to be deputy mayor?
He might have mentioned it.
But did he tell you about my big idea?
-No. -I'm going to defer Barnard for a year.
So, you and I can work together, side by side.
Ronnie...
No, I don't think that's a good idea.
I couldn't live with myself if I knew I was holding you back that way.
But you're not.
I'm choosing to be with you. My decision.
I'd drag you down. I don't want that.
I'd rather lose one year
than be out of sync with you, maybe forever.
♪ Are we listening? ♪
I wrote that song for Betty.
Come again.
The song that you found and sang at the speakeasy?
It was for Betty.
I don't understand.
-Did you guys--? -We kissed.
Once, during Hedwig.
But that's it, and we didn't want to hurt you and Jughead.
[feedback whines]
Votes have been tallied and double-checked by Miss Bell.
It is now my honor to announce this year's prom king and queen.
Actually, make that prom queens.
Congratulations to Miss Cheryl Blossom and Miss Antoinette Topaz.
-[crowd cheering] -Your new prom queens! Let's hear it!
Mr. Weatherbee, fellow classmates,
tonight, Toni and I are being named Riverdale High's
-first openly-gay royal couple. -[crowd cheers]
However, no queenship is complete without their court.
So, would my dear cousin, Betty Cooper, Jughead Jones,
Veronica Lodge, and Archie Andrews please join us
for the traditional promenade court dance?
["Fade Into You" playing over speakers]
♪ I wanna hold the hand inside you ♪
♪ I wanna take-- ♪
[record scratches]
-[girl 1] What? -What the hell's going on?
[girl 2] What happened?
If this is another Reggie Mantle prank--
["Psycho Killer" playing over speakers]
Don't think this is Reggie.
♪ Psycho Killer ♪
♪ Run, run, run, run, run Run, run away ♪
♪ Oh ♪
♪ Psycho Killer ♪
♪ Fa-fa-fa far better ♪
♪ Run, run, run, run, run Run, run away ♪
[man] Stop. Stop it, please!
Stop!
[girl screaming]
[music stops]
[crowd gasps]
[all murmuring]
[dramatic music playing]
Did they kill that guy from Blue Velvet Video?
Yeah. Come on. Let's go.
What the hell just happened?
Well, we didn't get to finish our ceremonial dance,
but we did win our crowns.
Come, fair Tee-Tee.
Our carriage is waiting to whisk us back to Thistlehouse.
-What's wrong, my sugarplum? -I can't go home with you.
Because of your nana.
-I thought you picked me. -For tonight I did.
She said if I didn't get home by midnight, she would never speak to me again.
I hope you can understand.
Of course.
Toni,
family is the most important thing.
Go and be with your nana.
And thank you for tonight.
Despite those moments of video horror, I will treasure these memories.
-Always. -Thank you, Cheryl.
I'm sure we'll be able to work it out. She just needs time.
-Okay? -Okay.
[Veronica] I don't wanna finish this conversation.
But we have to.
I know.
Did Betty tell Jughead about what happened?
No.
We both swore we wouldn't.
[sniffles]
We should keep it that way.
No need to blow them up, too.
I agree.
What do we do now?
[dramatic music playing]
Our last two weeks of high school are going to be fraught.
And I don't want them overshadowed by...
this.
So, after graduation...
we go our separate ways, Archie.
No big drama.
No fireworks.
I'll go to Barnard and...
you do whatever feels right to you.
[suspenseful music playing]
[Betty] Where did they go?
-Where's the creepy video store guy? -And our doppelgangers.
Why do all of our dances turn into a Jamie Lee Curtis movie?
[footsteps approaching]
Veronica?
[tender music playing]
What's wrong?
Was it that horrible video?
No.
It's not that, Mom.
Um...
Something happened between Betty and Archie.
Oh, honey.
I'm so sorry.
It's okay.
It'll be okay.
There, there, my child.
It shall all be fine in the end.
-Not this time, Nana. -Oh...
Tonight I realized Toni and I won't end up together.
Once again, I'm a victim of this family's curse.
I can no longer outrun my fate.
I am a Blossom.
Destined to be alone.
[Charles] We've got an APB out for David.
If he's behind the videos and he is fleeing, he's not gonna get far.
But what if he wasn't the auteur and he was really killed?
Then the video shown at prom was an actual snuff film.
What do we do? What can we do?
-Continue our search for David. -Or wait for the next video.
Pray that it's not the straw that breaks the camel's back.
[suspenseful music playing]
[closing theme playing] ng]