[country folk music playing]
¶
Millions of damn zombies on the march and me without a B-52.
A few well placed nukes and the human race is back in business.
[whining]
Oh, don't talk to me about collateral damage.
The death of the few for the good of the many.
[whining]
I know, I know. I'm talking out of my ass again.
I'm not nuking anybody.
Not today anyhow. But a man can dream, right?
Meanwhile, I guess it's up to Operation Bite Mark
to save humanity.
I'd feel a hell of a lot better if I knew where they were.
Pretty good, right dog?
Awww, you don't know.
(Murphy) Is this entire state uphill?
Where are we anyway?
(Warren) According to this map, we're in the Black Hills of South Dakota.
I miss the truck.
At least we're out of that damn horde.
(10K) There's nothing to kill out here.
That's fine by me.
We need to find a place to make camp soon.
My dogs is getting tired.
Well there's supposed to be a little town nearby
called Edgemont.
I'll take a compass reading at this next ridge up here.
(Doc) Can't we just take a break?
A quick one.
(Cassandra) Oh my God.
Look.
Now who in the hell did that?
Some daredevil with a sick sense of humor.
Is that Mount Rushmore?
This is why we can't have nice things.
(Doc) Probably the same jackass that tagged the Liberty Bell.
I think it's awesome.
If I ever catch who did that, they're gonna get a whoopin'.
Come on. Let's find that town. It's gonna get dark soon.
I thought we were taking a break.
Break time's over.
We've been walking for hours.
Admit it, Columbus, you're lost.
Give it a rest, Murphy.
Warren knows where she's going.
You know where you're going, Warren?
Well we should've hit the town by now.
And for the record, Columbus was lost when he discovered America.
Yeah, and look how that turned out.
Check this out.
That's not a town.
Well now being Doctor Brightside for the moment,
maybe there's something useful inside.
Yeah.
Let's check it out.
(Murphy) Oh, just like home.
(Warren) You know what,
this actually might be a safe place for us to get some rest
and load up on some supplies.
I could use an hour's sleep.
Hey. Doc, get the door.
Why do they still lock doors?
Luckily I have a skeleton key.
Well being Doctor Darkside,
we are not gonna find much food or ammo in here.
Yeah.
If we wanted industrial pipes, this would be the place to be.
I don't like this.
Oh, look.
Hey, hey, hold on. You can't just drink that.
What do you think this is the local piggly wiggly?
That could be some kind of
you know industrial type water that'll rot your insides.
Spare me the details.
Shhh, over there.
[snarling]
[whispering] Take cover. Come on.
[whispering] Everybody sit quietly.
[snarling]
[fart]
[snarling]
[whispering] Sorry.
[whispering] It got away from me.
[snarling continues]
[snarling]
[whispering] If I die because you farted, I am taking you with me.
Shhh.
[snarling]
[splorch]
What in the livin' hell?
It's glowin'.
It's like a zombie ghost.
Why is he glowing?
[snarling]
[snarling continues]
He's got friends.
[snarling continues]
[gunshot]
[splorch]
[click] [snarling continues]
[whispering] Shoot.
[muffled] Don't touch them!
[snarling continues]
[gunshot]
[growling]
Back away from the Zs! It's not safe!
[gunshot]
[snarling]
No! Don't touch them!
Are they contagious?
Radioactive.
Radioactive? How is that possible?
I'll show you.
There you go.
This is gonna be one of them days, ain't it?
Yep.
[electric guitar theme music plays]
¶ Have mercy...
[three gunshots]
¶ Oh, Have mercy. ¶¶
If you don't mind my asking,
what were you folks doing wandering out there
near the reactor?
We were lost.
We weren't lost.
Our vehicle ran out of gas 20 miles from here.
We took a shortcut through the woods so we could avoid the Zs.
You're not lost anymore.
Welcome to Edgemont, South Dakota.
Population three,
not counting you.
Name's Wilbur Grady. This is my daughter, Amelia.
Nice to meet you.
Nice meeting you.
I'm Roberta Warren. This is Murphy.
[coughing] And that's Cassandra. And this is 10K in the back.
[coughing continues]
Is he okay?
No.
Radiation poisoning.
I'm fine.
Let's get you folks checked out and get you some food.
Our place is just around here down the road a little ways.
[clicking]
What are these?
Iodine.
Oh.
It'll keep the radiation from accumulating in your thyroid.
Yeah, right.
Looks like you're still within safe levels.
But you're lucky we came along when we did.
Most of the Zs around here are highly radioactive.
As if being brain-eating zombies wasn't bad enough.
Okay. Question.
Shouldn't we be in one of these suits too?
Radiation levels aren't too bad out here.
But you'll probably get cancer in twenty years.
Somehow that's way down on my list of worries.
Yeah, but our more immediate problem
is the reactor core melting down.
We don't fix it soon,
then everything within a 300 mile radius will be glowing.
Not just the Zs.
Okay, well
it's been nice meeting you.
We have places to be,
places at least 300 miles from here.
Good luck with that.
Every vehicle in town is gone
or can't be driven.
Then I guess we better start walking.
You won't make it.
We have less than 48 hours
before the core starts to melt down.
Why are you still here?
Because there's still a chance to shut this thing down
and save a big chunk of God's country from being irradiated
for the next 10,000 years.
Besides
I'm already a goner.
Well what about your daughter?
Did she sign up for this suicide mission too?
I am sticking around to help my dad.
I told her I didn't need her help,
but she wouldn't listen.
I'm a pilot.
I'll fly us out of the hot zone.
Well perfect.
We'll just hitch a ride.
Yeah.
As you can see there's only room for one passenger.
And I have enough bullets for all of you,
so don't go getting any ideas.
Mister Grady, Wilbur.
I know it doesn't look like it, but this man...
this man is the only known survivor of a zombie bite.
[laughing] Thought there was something wrong with him.
(Warren) His blood carries antibodies for the zombie virus.
He's our last best hope for humanity.
[laughing]
Yeah right, and I'm the Easter bunny.
Show him.
Oh my God.
Now look, man.
This dude here's the real deal.
And a lot of people got killed getting him this far.
So tell us what we need to do to shut down that reactor
so we can be on our way.
(Murphy) Unless of course you have eggs to lay Mister Bunny.
[alarm sounding] Okay, here's the plan.
I need to get to the control room
to see if I can figure out why the fuel rods
aren't dropping down to the cooling pool
to stop the reaction.
I haven't been able to get in there
cuz of this gauntlet of zombies.
That's where I need your help.
Killing zombies, that's what we do.
Radiation levels are only slightly elevated
outside the containment building.
So you should be safe for at least two minutes.
Long enough to get me to the door
before you have to retreat back here.
Use whatever you have to keep the Zs from getting too close.
They're very contaminated.
One hug and you'll be dead in a few hours.
[growling]
Don't hug the zombies.
[splorch]
Got it.
[snarling]
You two stay here.
10K, you cover us from up there.
If we don't get back, you get him to California somehow.
[alarm continues] [snarling continues]
You ready?
Let's do this.
10K!
[growling]
[gunshot]
Two thousand, three hundred and four.
[muffled] Remember
two minutes!
No more!
Go!
[snarling continues]
[splorch]
[snarling]
[slice]
[growling] [slice]
[growling]
[hit]
[splorch]
[snarling continues]
[slice]
[smack]
[snarling continues]
[slice]
[yelling]
[smack]
[slice]
[smack]
[splorch]
[slice]
[yelling]
[slice]
[alarm continues]
Come on!
[alarm continues]
[muffled] You got one more minute!
[alarm continues]
[snarling]
[growling]
[smack]
[thud]
No hugging!
[alarm continues]
[snarling]
[slice]
Come on, let's go!
[alarm continues]
Time for you to go.
You got to go.
Go!
[growling]
Heads up!
[growling]
[yelling]
[growling]
[grunting]
[hit]
[slice]
[thud]
[alarm continues]
[growling]
I got it.
[splorch]
Get out of here.
You're out of time.
You have to go.
Go.
[alarm continues]
[growling]
[gunshot]
They're back.
[alarm continues]
(Radio) I'm almost to the control room.
Great. Keep going, dad.
[alarm continues]
What do we do now?
We wait.
[muffled] Operation Bitemark, this is Northern Light, come in.
[muffled] Operation Bitemark, this is Northern Light, do you copy?.
[muffled] Operation Bitemark, this is Northern Light, come in.
[muffled] Operation Bitemark, this is Northern Light, do you copy?.
[muffled] Operation Bitemark, this is Northern Light, come in.
[muffled] Operation Bitemark, this is Northern Light, do you copy.
Good Boy.
[muffled] Operation Bitemark. [alarm sounding]
(Alarm) Warning.
(Alarm) System overload.
Hey, here he comes.
Dad.
Dad, dad, dad, dad.
Dad, are you okay? Look at me, dad.
I didn't make it. Dad, dad, no, no.
No, hang on, hang on, hang on.
Dad. No! No!
[crying] No! Daddy.
[crying] No. Wake up.
[crying] Please.
No!
[growling]
[screaming] No! No! No, no, please, no, not you dad!
[splorch]
[screaming] No! No! No!
[crying] No.
[crying] Not you.
I'm sorry. Let's bury him.
[crying]
No.
Well I'd like to know what we're supposed to do about it.
Can't run.
We're still within the blast zone.
[alarm sounding]
We go in.
(Doc) And do what?
Grady was the one who knew how to shut that thing off.
I'm a doctor, dammit, not a nuclear physicist.
He was so close.
Your dad gave it a good try.
Sometimes that's the best we can do.
It wasn't dying that he was afraid of.
He really didn't want to become a Z,
even for a few seconds.
Amelia, we need to know...
Can you shut this thing down by yourself
if we protect you?
[alarm continues]
I know airplanes,
not nukes.
Awesome.
I mean there's one guy.
Here, here in Edgemont?
Yeah, Homer Stubbins.
He was the chief engineer at the plant for 20 years.
He was dad's boss.
He's been holed up in the woods since the apocalypse.
He's armed and dangerous.
He became a recluse after the death of his son.
How do we find Homer?
He won't talk to you.
We have to try.
We have to stop here.
We're still fifty yards away.
My dad said the place was booby-trapped.
I told you, Homer's crazy.
Have we completely dismissed the idea of a phone call?
Just sayin'.
Hey.
This is your kinda set-up. How do we get in?
Without us getting killed. I do like to keep that in mind.
Uh, well one thing.
Homer's set-up is aimed at stopping Zs, not a team. So
if we keep a sharp eye out for landmines, trip wires...
We'll be fine.
Okay.
The three of you guys, stay here.
Give us a 40 second head start.
We'll flank him and come up from behind.
Okay, watch for mines.
Watching them.
[smack]
[yelling]
Don't move!
You have three seconds to tell me what you're doing here.
One.
Two.
Don't do that, sir.
Go ahead. Do me a solid.
Just don't leave me a Z.
I'd never do that, Mr. Stubbins.
We just need your help.
Hello to you too.
Grady was a good man.
If anyone could SCRAM that reactor
it was him.
SCRAM?
Safety Control Rod Axe Man.
Goes back to the first reactors.
The only safety system they had was literally a man with an axe
whose whole job in the event of a meltdown
was to cut the rope holding fuel rods over the cooling pool.
That's what dad was trying to do.
How much time do you have?
How much time do we have?
You're in the soup with us, Homer.
You've confused me with someone who gives a damn.
According to Grady, less than 40 hours.
And we do give a damn.
Now are you gonna help us
or are you gonna sit here and let us all die?
Well there's one thing we might try.
I'm gonna have to show you.
We're gonna need weapons, equipment.
Come on.
Load up.
It's not as if I'm gonna be needing this stuff.
Hello, nurse.
Vitamin V. The elixir of the Zombie Apocalypse.
You know you're looking at the original building plans
for this reactor.
I was part of the design team.
You're pretty handy with that knife
for a kid.
My son...
he had one like it
but with a longer blade.
Yeah, older model.
Got to be good to make it work.
Oh, Max was good.
(Warren) Okay, let's go, let's do it.
I heard about your son.
I'm sorry.
There's nothing worse than outliving your own child.
Nothing.
There sure is a whole lot of nothing in South Dakota,
huh boy?
[whispering] Dammit.
[computer beeping]
What the hell?
A satellite phone?
Is it my team?
Oh, rats.
Northern Light, come in.
I don't know what you want with that old piece of junk.
Nobody to call.
We got somebody that might pick up.
[alarm sounding]
Northern Light, come in.
[fence rattling] [snarling]
Something wrong, Homer?
[snarling continues]
I knew her, that's all.
Her son was one of Max's buddies.
[alarm continues]
Did you ever go back to the house you grew up in
only to see it's falling apart and in a bad neighborhood?
That's what this feels like.
Times ten.
Well where I grew up, the Zombie Apocalypse only improved things.
[snarling continues]
[splorch]
All right, back to business.
From here on the area's hot, right?
You got two clean rad suits in there.
One for me and
I need somebody to back me up.
No. I'll go.
Well you can't go.
Who's gonna get him to California
if something goes wrong?
Don't look at me.
[alarm continues]
Okay. All right.
Just remember you have ammo now.
But not an infinite supply.
Let's do this.
[industrial motors running]
[snarling]
[gunshot]
We made it to the control room.
And there's our problem. Cooling pool three.
Can you SCRAM it or not?
According to the controls, all the rods are enabled
but something is physically blocking the insertion.
We need to remove it.
By hand?
Not by our hand.
This is Robbie.
He will roll into the core and do a manual SCRAM.
He can cut through anything.
This little darlin' can vaporize steel.
I get it.
It's like a drone.
Only he never leaves the ground.
(10K) There's too many Zs.
Back it up, Homer.
I'll do the driving.
We need to go forward.
[sizzling]
Damn Zs got us.
[growling]
You're an ugly one.
[sizzling]
Damn Z.
I don't have time for this.
[splorch]
Get 'em out of there.
Damn Z.
Leave.
We lost Robbie.
So what now?
Plan B or is it C?
Give me a D, E, F. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
Not helpful.
[alarm sounding]
All right. Robbie failed.
But I can still do a manual SCRAM.
How? That place is filled with Zs.
We'll go in heavier.
Take us along this time.
We probably only got one more shot at a SCRAM.
But we'll need heavier suits to reach the control room.
Where do we find them?
In the lab, not far from where we lost Robbie.
Four can go in, two in these suits.
Me and the kid in the heavies.
Okay.
But what happens if plan C doesn't work
and we wind up with our very own Fukushima Chernobyl whatever?
You mean what happens to you?
Hey.
I didn't ask for the job of saving the human race.
Amelia.
Would you be willing to fly him out of the radiation zone?
[alarm continues]
To be honest,
I don't have enough fuel.
I lied to my dad
or else he never would have let me stay behind.
Oh great.
If I had a few gallons,
I might be able to get myself and one other person
outside the blast zone, if we are lucky.
Okay, a buddy and I once converted a Dodge Dart
to run on alcohol.
A light plane engine isn't that different.
You had a serious supply of vodka.
You're welcome to it.
Okay.
Doc and Cassandra,
go with 10K and Homer. You cover them.
Murphy and Amelia, come with me.
Given we have no other choices,
I shall embrace the inevitable.
(Warren) If this works, we'll meet back here to celebrate.
[computer alarm sounding]
[loud alarm sounding] [snarling]
[gunshot]
That's not good. We have 30 minutes till boom.
[pop, crack] Brave little dude.
Too bad we have to leave him here like this.
Sentiment is a fatal flaw in this ugly world.
[alarm sounding]
We should let Warren know where we are in case we need backup,
right?
[loud alarm sounding]
Warren, this is Doc.
(Radio) Please be advised we have entered the tunnel
to the reactor core. Over and out.
Let's see what's going on with this baby.
So Amelia, my dear.
Where exactly might we be headed
in this fine piece of aeronautical hardware?
Considering it's only my life and the human race at stake.
Sheridan, Wyoming.
It's to the northwest,
and the fallout will be to the southeast.
Far enough away, and
my dad and I heard there's some real humans.
I just hope it works.
Piece of cake. All I need is some tools.
Murphy, could you quit drinking your fuel
and fill up the damn tank?
I don't know where the tank is.
Well it's not in your mouth.
Let me get a screwdriver.
Okay, so that was 22 gallons.
Sheridan is 250 miles as the crow flies.
Here's a couple more.
Is that gonna be far enough to clear the blast zone?
It'll have to be.
Well this is vodka, not avgas. So the mileage may vary.
Listen, I, uhhh...
Oh shit, you're not gonna try and say goodbye, are you?
I was going to say
be grateful for all the sacrifices everyone has made.
Hey!
Back at you.
[airplane motor starting]
(Murphy) Are we there yet?
We've been in the air for five minutes.
You know, I kinda like this. You can't see any zombies.
They're down there, bet on it.
Hey, if we find more fuel in Billings,
we could take off again and head to California.
If we find vodka.
I don't know how to change this carburetor back to a gas-burner.
Doc, this is Warren, back at the plant,
coming in the same way.
Doc, Warren.
(Radio) Hello, Roberta. Welcome back.
[snarling] [gunshots] Please be advised we're now entering the reactor core
on the other side of the facility.
Is there something I can do?
(Radio) Oh, just the usual prayer.
What's the status of that precious cargo?
Has the mouthy package taken off?
Yeah, he's in the air.
[loud alarm sounding] [growling]
Then we'll fix our little problem.
[snarling]
[gunshot]
And see you on the way out.
Will you miss your friends?
They're not my friends.
More like foxhole buddies.
But yeah.
What's going on? Wait.
I...
What is that? I got it.
Just a little turbulence.
[alarm sounding]
Oh God!
Hang on.
Shut up and hang on! Oh God!
[alarm sounding]
[grunting]
[mumbling]
Amelia!
[growling]
Oh God, no.
[snarling]
Mercy.
[snarling]
It's weird.
It's too weird.
[snarling continues]
All right.
Which one of you fine vehicles is our ride out of here?
[computer beeping]
Hello, Delta-X-Ray.
This is Delta-X-Ray, copy.
I need a little information on glowing zombies.
[alarm sounding] [growling]
(Radio) Okay. Checking zombie-pedia.
Are you kidding?
For now, but it's not a bad idea.
Okay.
It's called 'Angel's Glow.' Comes from nematode bacteria.
(Radio) Somehow the radiation affects zombie skin
and lets bacteria grow there.
The bacteria glows when exposed to high levels of radiation.
(Radio) First observed at Fukushima.
I just need an answer. Are they hot or not?
Don't let them
spatter you.
[growling]
[whispering] Shoot.
[growling]
[gunshot]
[growling] [gunshot]
[splorch]
[alarm continues]
(Radio) Still there?
Yeah.
I got no other place to be.
[loud alarm sounding] [geiger counter clicking]
(alarm) Warning. System overload.
How you feeling?
Like a baked potato in this thing.
Reactor core is right down this corridor.
Then why are we standing here?
Because it's highly radioactive in there.
I'm going into the core to manually insert those rods.
By yourself?
Out of my way, sonny.
I'm sorry. You need backup.
Suit yourself.
You guys go. I've got it.
Take this.
And we need to hear everything!
All right! Go on! Move it!
[loud alarm sounding]
Come on!
[loud alarm continues]
[alarm sounding]
[alarm continues]
[growling]
[hit]
[growling]
[gunshot]
[growling] [grunting]
[breathing heavily]
[growling]
[rip]
[hissing]
[gunshot]
[breathing heavily]
That guy came out of nowhere. I couldn't move fast enough.
It's one of those good news, really really bad news things.
The suit is breached.
Can I tape it up?
Son, I've accumulated so many rads in my life,
I was probably a dead man
the moment I walked through the gate.
There's got to be something I can do.
Aren't you gonna add to your count?
Two thousand three hundred and sixteen.
You know you're a good kid, strong, smart, like my son Max.
I just hope to God you have better luck.
You're a lot like my dad too.
With the same bad luck.
You need to go on for all of us.
Promise me that.
Live the life
my son never had.
(Alarm) Warning, system overload.
We need to get up there.
[alarm continues]
Time really is a waistin'.
Let's get to it.
There's our problem.
Two rods didn't go down.
(Radio) I'm gonna have to go out there and unstick those rods.
Be careful not to drop me into the reactor pool.
I'll be cooked instantly.
We shouldn't have left them alone.
(Radio) Got it.
[alarm continues]
We couldn't stay. We were at our limits.
That thing goes off and limits won't matter.
Homer knows what he's doing.
And the kid is awesome.
(Radio) Here I go.
[alarm continues]
Can you get me closer?
Yeah, sorry.
I thought everybody your age was a whiz with a remote.
Not me.
Lower me a little more.
Can you get me a little closer?
Okay.
Now hit the switch that says claw release.
[multiple loud alarms sounding]
One down.
(Alarm) Evacuate. Evacuate.
Once this is fixed,
shoot me and get out.
I don't want to become one of them.
[snarling]
If I haven't said anything lately,
thank you
so much,
universe.
For the Zombie Apocalypse!
[snarling continues]
And for Doctor Merch and my whole
situation!
And for, well I don't know, let's see, what else.
The Badlands Nuclear Power Plant!
And yes!
Points to you, universe!
Points to you for dragging my ass
all the way to South Dakota to die!
[snarling continues]
That was sarcasm.
[snarling continues]
I am not like other boys.
I do not give mercy.
[snarling continues]
Go home!
[snarling continues]
I don't have anything for you!
Can't you find somebody to munch on?
[snarling continues]
Oh God,
really is puppies and kittens.
[snarling continues]
Two...
more...
inches.
Now hit the claw release again.
[multiple loud alarms sounding]
[muffled] Almost... there.
[multiple loud alarms continue]
(Alarm) Temperature normalizing.
Homer, it worked.
How about that?
We did good.
All right, now let me get you out of there.
Shoot me now.
I already killed my father. I don't want to kill you.
You don't make it easy.
No, no, no! No, no, no! No!
[screaming] No!
[snarling]
Here he comes.
(Doc) Hey, kid! Wait! Wait up!
(Cassandra) Homer saved us!
That's right. He saved the whole town!
It's not that!
I couldn't save him.
I know, I know. We heard.
You did everything you could.
You gave him mercy.
You remind me of my ex-wife, back from Costco.
Who'd marry you?
Several women, I'll have you know.
None with very good taste
or staying power.
So it all worked.
We're safe.
From the meltdown.
Nothing else.
Is this a battery charger?
Yeah. I couldn't find a truck that I could fix,
so that'll keep us going.
All right, so we can get back on the trail. But where to?
Given the fact that we've lost patient zero.
Great news!
The vodka made perfect fuel
for ten minutes!
What happened?
Crash landing
about a hundred miles out of town.
Wow, you covered a lot of ground.
Did you hitchhike?
Ten miles, whatever.
It felt like a hundred miles when you're walking.
So what happened to Amelia?
[snarling]
Oh no.
You didn't give her mercy?
It didn't feel right, somehow.
So you just let her follow you?
That... felt... right, somehow.
Okay, what do you want us to do?
No, no! No, no, no, no, no! No!
No!
She is not hurting us!
I don't know.
Maybe it's time for a different kind of mercy.
[snarling]
[whispering] Okay.
Climb aboard.
[snarling]