Sorry for not letting you freshen up in the morning.
Shut up!
Sorry for calling you five times this morning.
Rubbish! You've called me ten times.
Sorry, sir.
I spent all night getting this firecracker made,
so that we could start with a bang, have some fun.
All gone to waste.
It's bad enough there was no dancing.
The least you could do is serve us crispy samosas.
Ready, oye!
Five, six, seven, eight…
Why is… everyone climbing in and not out?
Didi, no dance, no party. All canceled.
-Canceled? -Yeah.
Are, I wore sports shoes with my saree today
so that I can do the "Lungi Dance".
And it's canceled?
Who did it?
The one you called worthy
The one you called worthy is me
O' my beloved…
Mubtala, you idiot.
-Remember it… -Are, Tyagiji!
You're still waiting here?
Both of us already filed our nomination.
-Both of you? -Mm.
Jha, are you also running?
See? Even Mr. Tyagi can't digest
that a nuisance like you is contesting the election.
I actually came to support Ahmedji.
But the secretary didn't have change for 500 rupees.
-So? -So I thought, since I'm already here,
I'll also file my nomination.
Oh, Tyagi!
Mm. Oh.
I hope you have some change, otherwise, you'll have another…
All the best.
Oh, veere, give it a second thought, yaar.
We have arranged for the best catering and everything!
Drums, fireworks, and Nagin dance!
We need the whole town to know
that VD Tyagi has arrived to file his nomination, yaar!
The whole town?
Oye, Mintu, does the "B" in your "LLB" stand for "Brainless"?
I'm here to fill my nomination form. I'm not here to get married.
Have you ever seen CEOs and doctors dancing on patriotic songs on the streets?
Try to be a little refined, a little cultured.
Uh, what cu--
Oh, yaar! All this culture vulture BS isn't going to get you elected, Tyagi.
A little bit of showing off is needed to win these things, yaar.
Showing off? In front of Kazmi?
Do you even know him?
Are, he listens to… Ghulam Ali. You know Ghulam Ali?
To songs like "Chupke Chupke"
and you want to jump up and down doing the "Lungi Dance"?
Your brain has turned to mush.
Uh, K-Kazmi who?
Lillah! Come on.
Well, I must say, it's a real pleasure
to meet a candidate who's been recommended
by someone as highly respected as Mr. Wadia.
Believe me, Tyagi saab.
This bar association… needs hard-working men like you
who uphold the spirit of the law.
I hope this ghazal isn't bothering you.
No, no, no, it's not the ghazal.
It's the singer that's bothering me, Kazmi saab.
To drop one of… Momin's most exquisite couplets,
-what could be a bigger crime than that? -Let's hear it.
Let's hear it.
The one you called worthy and loyal…
I am the one, my beloved
Hope you remember our encounter…
Vaah!
Subhanallah!
Vaah.
I must say, it's very rare to meet someone
with such grace and nafasat in this profession nowadays.
Jee huzoor, lawyers nowadays are only interested in showing off.
Kaifiyat.
What?
Is he a big criminal lawyer?
He's a big criminal…
lawyer.
What the hell, Cheema?
Sorry, Mintu!
But they had crispy samosas.
He's showing off like this because his uncle is a judge.
The fucker has no idea that our own father is a judge.
I swear if I'd known beforehand that we would meet here,
I would've given the laddoos personally.
I've sent them to your chamber.
Along with a little gift.
Huh.
A token from me.
DISTRICT COURT, PATPARGANJ, DELHI
Didi.
Why did you call me so early?
I missed my Krav Maga class because of this.
You've already done your LLM. Why study more?
Start your practice or you'll remain a legal virgin forever.
-Didi, it's a-- -Here, take my…
-lucky naada. -Naada…
What naada? Didi, I said I was trying to get a case,
not some silly naada.
Are, now that you have your naada, you will get a case from here.
Cause list. These are all the cases that will be handled in court today.
But Didi, advocates have already been assigned.
Yeah, but they won't all show up.
Some advocates will have dropped their cases.
Some may have dates that are clashing, and some might not be up to it.
Not up to it as in…?
This is justice, not Pilates that they're not "up to it".
Are, just run through the whole cause list
and go find those people who are roaming free without an advocate.
And if you need anyone's number, go ask Vishwas, okay? See you.
-Will he share them with me? -He may not help anyone else.
He'll help you.
Thank… you.
Boss, I don't know about that. I'm issuing a notice against you.
That's it.
Don't do that, sir. I'm telling you the truth, sir.
-I put up a cause list this morning. -Right.
But someone took it.
Yeah, you put it up and then someone took it.
Fuck off! First of all, you don't do your job,
then you give me this conspiracy theory--
-Vishwas. -Hold on, hold on.
Do you… have Mangal Dheema's contact information by any chance?
-Good morning, Ani. -Good morning.
Oh, Mangal Dhee-- Just have a look at today's cause list.
See! See! I told you, sir,
I had put up the list and someone took it.
Who is that?
I'll deal with you later.
Cause list.
-What were you saying? -Mangal Dheema.
Uh, he's an advocate who's handling eight legal matters in different courts
and three of them are even clashing.
Clashing? If the dates are clashing,
the clients must be poor.
There's a Buleswar…
G-Gaya Prasad and Ram Bishal.
They all sound like characters from a tragic Premchand novel.
This Mangalji… must be a seva kendra lawyer.
Seva kendra?
Legal aid.
-Wow. -Mm.
Mangalji provides so many impoverished people with legal aid.
Poor, poor. Tea?
For the next three years, I think I'm going to assist him.
Vishwas, do you think I could get his number?
Of course you can.
Listen, do you, um… do this for everyone or are you doing this specially for me?
If government officers like me can't be of help to the elite like you,
then… what's the point of me being in this post at all?
The number you're calling
is currently switched off.
Don't worry. He's bound to come to court.
Sir, the photo is of this nameplate.
If Phoreyji complained against us to the council,
then why did he send us a copy?
It's a slap in the face.
Then why did he send us these laddoos?
He's sending a kiss as well.
A kiss along with a slap?
Oh, veree, he's trying some BDSM with us.
Are, this complaint is total rubbish.
-Sir, how is this nameplate illegal? -Are, it is.
It's against the rules set by the bar council.
It's written here, "An advocate signboard or nameplate
displayed publicly or otherwise, should be of a reasonable size."
And who the hell is going to decide what's a reasonable size, huh, Munshiji?
A nameplate should not be bigger than this size.
It goes on to say,
"Additionally, the signboard or nameplate
should not indicate that he or she, is or has,
been president, chairman, office bearer of the bar council or any associations."
So you can be the president of the bar association,
but you can't mention it?
In our profession, no one believes anything
until it's in writing.
Oye, what is this nonsense law?
Not law, rule.
And Visheshwar, a rule has been broken.
You nameplate is much bigger than it should be
and it has "President Bar Association" written on it.
Hello?
Yes?
Yes, I, uh…
received a copy of the complaint.
Thank you.
That was Kazmi on the phone.
The council is holding a committee meeting.
My nomination might get canceled.
Nomination might get canceled?
Tyagi, I swear I want to hit this fucker's face with my elbow
and get a charge sheet filed against myself!
I want to tear his mustache off and shove it down his throat!
Rip his dick off and make a tie off it!
Mintu, yaar.
Everyone, leave the room for two minutes. I want to be alone. Go outside, please.
Come on, Mintu.
Ram Bishal versus Gaya Prasad.
Gaya Prasadji?
Gaya-- Gaya Prasadji?
Mr. Gaya Prasad?
I'll tell you what to do.
-Mr. Buleswar? -No, ma'am.
-Mr. Buleswar? -No, no.
Mr. Buleswar?
Yes, that's me!
-You're Mr. Buleswar? -Huh.
Buleswar!
So, Buleswarji, what is your matter exactly?
Compensation.
Someone's truck hit my buffalo.
-Buleswarji. -Yes?
-Please come sit here. -Okay.
So Mangalji also deals with restitution matters.
I don't know how he handles all this stress.
By the way, where is Mangalji?
Huh?
Don't worry, it's vegan. You can have it.
Mangalji?
Mangalji is not coming.
He told me to ask for a court date.
How did he do that? His phone's not reachable.
Not today. He told me this three years ago at the seva kendra.
I have been asking for the dates since then.
-Really, for three years? -Yeah.
Mangalji is never free to come.
How can he?
When he's so overworked.
You know how many cases he's dealing with?
But don't worry.
I'm going to assist him now and everything's going to be fine, okay?
You will get clean drinking water at this canteen.
That gutter water you are drinking will give you cholera.
Don't worry, it's, um, alkaline water.
It's completely safe.
So, uh, where does Mangalji sit?
-Mangalji? -Yeah.
Must be in his room.
-Tsk. Where is his room? -In his house.
Where is his house?
I don't know.
Buleswarji…
that man is working day and night just to get justice for your buffalo.
And you don't have his number nor his address?
What do you have? Tell me.
Hmm. This.
NOTARY, MANGAL DHEEMA, BA LLB, ADVOCATE
DHEEME DHEEME
So what would you like?
A facial?
Kundalini awakening?
It's stress relieving.
Oh, no, thank you.
I'm actually here to meet Mangal Dheemaji.
I'm a big fan of his work.
I am him.
Oh, but you're… you're an advocate, right?
Yeah, I am that too.
But I am this too.
Ha! He's both, man. Two-in-one.
I just want to help you
so that you can further help people in need.
You know, the… impoverished sections of society.
-What sections? -Are, poor, poor.
Ah!
Now I get it.
Now you get what?
World peace.
Amnesty International!
Magsaysay type!
Don't worry. I got it. I got it.
I've heard a lot about people like you.
But I'm seeing one for the first time.
Don't worry, I know exactly what you people are looking for.
I'm part of the Free the Nipple campaign as well, you know?
All the poor--
Im… poverished sec… tion cases.
Flood victims.
Riot victims.
Drug addicts.
Victims of violence.
A few are crowdfunded by Ketto as well.
They are the premium poor. Everything you want is here.
Per case, 20,000.
What?
If you pay me a lump sum, I'll bring the price down some.
Munshiji, why are we sitting outside?
Oye, there are some men who prefer to cry alone.
He isn't crying.
He's opening.
What?
He's opening a door.
Huh?
I can't hear anything. Can you?
Are, our friend, Tyagi's father,
Justice Sarveshwar Dayal Tyagi, used to tell us a story.
Chintan Dasji was a prominent lawyer.
He had made up his mind to leave his firm
to his younger son Sanatan after his death.
He used to believe that his younger son was the true lawyer.
But… his elder son, Puratan, couldn't accept this.
First of all, he was older,
and he also thought he was a much better lawyer than his brother.
So Chintan Dasji set up a test.
He made Puratan and Sanatan follow him into a massive empty room.
And he said, "I am going to lock this door from the outside.
The first person to come out of this room will be considered the true lawyer.
And the firm will go to him."
Did the room have a window?
No.
Any tunnels or lanterns?
An attached bathroom?
Those were the things Puratan kept looking for.
But he simply couldn't find another way out.
Are, but that means there was no way to get out, right?
Yeah.
That's the kind of thinking that made Puratan give up.
But Sanatan managed to get out.
He was a shape-shifting snake.
No. Sanatan was a true lawyer.
He went to the door and turned the handle
to see if it was open or not.
The door was open.
Oye, this Sanatan guy just took a lucky shot, nothing else.
Huh.
"The door is closed."
That made all the difference.
You see, when an ordinary man hears these words,
he either goes another way… or he gives up defeated.
But a true lawyer… starts asking questions.
"Is the door really closed?"
"Who is it closed for?"
"How long is it closed for?" "Who ordered the door to be closed?"
And he keeps asking all kinds of questions until the door is--
Are you coming or not?
-Law? -Yes, sir?
-Prepare a show cause notice. -Okay.
-Mintu. -Mm?
Make calls to every president in the Delhi Court.
-Order, you need to go to Shahdara. -Yes, sir?
Abe! Are, go and tell him he needs to pick up the drummer from there.
The drummer? What are you about to do?
Mintu.
The whole bloody town should know what I'm about to do.
When the judge sees that Didi is the lawyer representing your case,
he'll know you are on the right side of the law.
Didi doesn't need to argue.
Didi is the argument.
Didi, Vishwas…
That Mangal Dheema… He's a cheat! He's a fraud!
And he's a scamster!
Hmm.
What is this?
A complaint.
Against Mangal Dheema.
Ma'am, you trusted this man
and put him in charge of Mr. Buleswar's case.
But he isn't doing anything about it.
Mr. Buleswar himself has got dates for three years.
Listen, only Mr. Buleswar can file a case against him or the court.
You have no locus standi here.
I cannot accept this complaint.
-But-- -No, no, no, no, no.
You cannot refuse to accept a complaint.
Yeah, whether you choose to do something about it or not is entirely up to you,
but you have to accept the complaint.
Look, I'm a Class 1 government employee myself.
You will accept this complaint and you'll sign for it as well.
Otherwise, based on a complaint from me, action will be taken against you.
Signature.
Thank you.
-You complained against me? -Yes.
My license will get canceled.
Absolutely.
If I don't do what you say, then…
Yeah.
That's the remote for the AC.
But if I do what you tell me to…
…then you will handle this case and I'll get to collect the fees?
Yeah.
-Huh? -Yeah.
That's great!
Here you go.
-What-- -Asshole!
You think you can try this slap and kiss shit with a lawyer?
-Slap and kiss? -Go and revoke my license.
-Go on. -Uh…
Do you think I pay my bills by the money I earn as a lawyer?
You relax, huh?
His main line of work is acupuncture.
He's a lawyer only part-time.
Idiot, even acupuncture is part-time.
My main job is facials.
-Oh. -Do you want one?
Actually-- No, thank you.
Get out.
-Look here, the complaint-- -Get out!
One second, one second, one second…
Sit down. Sit down. Sit down.
Mr. Lawyer…
your main job is doing facials?
-Now do-- -No, no, no, no.
You're a full-time beautician and you're ignoring her?
Mr. Lawyer, check her out. I mean, take a good look at her.
The ultimate glamor girl standing right in front of you
and you're ignoring her?
Once she starts coming here regularly,
your salon will reach heights you can't even imagine right now.
You think she's some ordinary woman?
She's from South Delhi.
Are, you know the salon she goes to to get a facial done?
While applying cream on her face,
they serve a complimentary juice worth 150 rupees, did you know that, huh?
Huh?
And once she becomes one of your regular customers, Mr. Lawyer,
I'm telling you,
all the ladies in Laxmi Nagar will line up for your facial
and that aqua type of puncture
that you do.
I tried this once before.
The foreign-returned urban types.
They all got pissed off.
This kind of thing doesn't work here.
They like things more rustic.
-More rustic? -More relatable.
What does he think?
He walks around like some kind of a big shot.
Now, watch how they cut him down to size.
There he is. Seems to be in a good mood.
He's here.
Tyagiji,
are you willing to acknowledge that putting up a nameplate of this size
is completely against the rules and guidelines of the Bar Council?
Yes, I do.
Then you must be aware that the council has full authority
to take appropriate action against you for this violation.
Yes.
Chapter 4, Section 5.3.
Well, I thank you for your candor.
I have nothing further to add to this.
The members of the panel will decide
what is the right course of action to take against you.
Objection, sir.
Kazmi saab, why this action against me?
Action should be taken against the owner of the nameplate.
-Are, it is his nameplate. -Yeah.
Kindly elaborate, Tyagi saab. What exactly are you trying to say?
The thing is, Kazmi saab, there's been a misunderstanding.
You see "VD Tyagi" on the nameplate but actually, it's not really a name.
It's a logo.
For example, a lot of companies have logos, right?
A sign.
But sometimes, we find very difficult to read.
But then, there are other companies that have logos that we can read
without any problem.
So "VD Tyagi And Associates" is a logo,
not a nameplate.
So, now to say this, Kazmi saab,
that the nameplate is too big and the letters are too big,
this is…
…this is not a valid complaint,
-Kazmi saab. -Hey, one minute, one minute!
If… if this is not a name and only a logo,
then why is "President, Patparganj Bar Association"
written at the bottom?
Tell me, huh?
No, no. Are you the president or is the firm?
Tell me.
You're absolutely right. I'm the president.
So who gave this firm the authority
to write "President of the Bar Association"?
That's what I want to know.
Should this question be put to me or the firm?
Look, the law is very clear, Kazmi saab.
That individuals and firms are two separate entities.
Therefore, I'm separate and my firm is separate. Correct?
And sir, I would like to inform the panel that as soon as I found out about this,
I followed the bylaws of the Patparganj Bar Association.
And I sent the firm a show cause notice immediately.
One minute, sir. Mintu.
-Has he gone crazy? -What is he doing?
Sir, look at these.
Rajdeep Sehgal. Parimal Jha.
Sir, just look at their nameplates.
Advocate Gaurav Sharma.
Look at the size of the nameplates.
Shima Trivedi, Saurabh Khanna…
Take a good look at them, sir.
Sir, it looks like…
I'm not alone, sir.
He is making a fool out of everyone.
Say something.
I hope VD Tyagi's nomination as an individual
is accepted by the council.
Based on the precedent said by the council today,
action will have to be taken… against everyone.
Tyagi saab, you can start your preparations for the elections.
Are, what do you mean, "start your preparations"?
Is this some kind of joke or something? Hey!
Um, Kazmi saab…
this reminds me of a couplet by Wasim saab, if I may?
Let's hear it.
This life is a carnival!
What good are promises here?
Vaah!
Life is a carnival!
What good are promises here?
When the sun sets
Everyone will take his own path!
O' Wasim…
It takes guts
To fulfill enmity with someone!
How can one
Take revenge against anyone
Who is untrue to himself?
Loved the laddoos.
Subhanallah!
Didi!
My first case.
-Aha! -Oh!
Thank you.
I really enjoyed getting a lift in your car today.
-Anytime, Didi. -You're looking nice.
-Thanks. -Pretty.
-Are you excited? -Yeah.
-Have you had yogurt and sugar? -No.
And who are you?
What do you mean? I'm this man's lawyer.
And I am going to ask the questions, who are you?
Saab, I told you about her.
Ah! The girl who drinks water from the gutter. This is her, huh? Okay.
Sir, I think there's been some confusion. I'm a part of Mangal Dheemaji's team.
And I am going to get restitution for his buffalo.
Someone filed a complaint against Mangal Dheemaji.
Huh?
Some lawyer called Ananya Shroff.
So I'm handling all the matters for now.
That means you cannot argue on his behalf.
Thank you very much for the file.
Come on. It's our turn. Let's go, let's go!
We need a court date as well. Let's go.
But sir, how can you just-- Sir!
The things I have done to get this case, yaar.
You've done?
Please remember the things that I've done.
DHEEME DHEEME
NO WAGES, NO HONOR IN DISTRICT COURTS OWING TO POOR LEGAL AID
NO MORE SELF-ADVERTISING ALLOWED FOR LAWYERS O POOR LEGAL AID