WEBVTT

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Please be seated.

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We have gathered here

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to witness the joining
of these two beloved souls.

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It has been said that
love is patient, love is kind,

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but I have found it to be
much more life-threatening than that.

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When we first fall in love,
we become soft.

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And in our softness, we are stabbed
all the way through the chest.

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That's love.

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It's a metal rod through the heart,
piercing you.

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Every day, you hope that
that rod isn't ripped out.

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But like any risk,

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it's the thrill
that makes it all worthwhile.

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To love fully,
one must offer themselves up.

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The most important decision is
who you trust to hold

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the other end of that metal rod.

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And now the couple has decided
to write their own vows.

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Rachel, we'll start with you first.

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Nicky.

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Falling for you was so easy
and happened so fast.

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Our first date was in a rental car

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and lasted four days.

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-Hm.
-Four days.

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And… I remember thinking…

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"I never wanna get out of this car."

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Aw.

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And four days is now… …forever.

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I spent my life trying to arm myself

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against bad luck, always…

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in pursuit of certainty. But,

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yeah, as we know, this week has
put us through the fucking wringer.

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Sorry. Put us through the wringer.

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And through it all, I realized that

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you can't rely on certainty because there…

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there is no certainty in marriage,
in love, in anything.

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The only certainty in life is death.

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The only certainty in life is death.

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So fuck certainty.

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I have nothing to worry about.

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Because you… you are my good luck charm.

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You have always, always, always
been my good luck charm.

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It's true.

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So…

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I vow, Nicky, to see you truly
as you have done for me.

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And I promise to…

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believe in you and believe in us.

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Because that is…
that's really what this… this is.

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It's… it's a leap of faith
that we don't know what's gonna happen,

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but we believe it's gonna work out.

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And I…

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I believe you are my soulmate.

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So wherever we… we're going…
wherever we're going…

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I never wanna get out of this rental car.

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Okay, I'm done.

00:06:18.958 --> 00:06:22.166 align:center
-Okay, Nicky, your turn.
-Yeah. Okay.

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I wrote mine down. Um…

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Rachel.

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Um… I wish I went first.
That's tough. That is tough to follow.

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Okay, Rachel, as you could see
from the second you got here,

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I grew up in a household
where marriage was highly regarded.

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So of course, when you told me
two weeks into our relationship

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that you'd never get married, I thought,

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"She's the one."

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Um, but really, I never had to interrogate
if you were the one

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because I always just knew.

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And after spending one hour with you,

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I thought to myself,
"I hope… I hope every hour is like this."

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"And if I don't spend
the rest of my life with her,

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it's because I fucked up really badly."

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I made a vow to myself
not to fuck it up really badly

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so that I could stand at an altar one day
making vows to you.

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So here we are.

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I promise to always give you my love,

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my time, my understanding.

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I promise to be a nonjudgmental partner
in whatever adventures you seek.

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I promise to stand beside you always,

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even in times of disagreement.

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There is nothing in the world
that matters more to me than you.

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And I won't let anything get between us.

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I love you.

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That was beautiful.

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That was beautiful, both of you.

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Okay, now for the big moment, yeah.
The… the rings, please.

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There you go. This is for you.

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This is for you.

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Oh, I'm shaking.

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Okay.

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Rachel Alexandra Harkin,

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do you take Nicholas Summer Cunningham
to be your lawfully wedded husband,

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to have and to hold in sickness
and in health till death do you part?

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I do.

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Nicholas Summer Cunningham,

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do you take Rachel Alexandra Harkin
to be your lawfully wedded wife,

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to have and to hold in sickness
and in health until death do you part?

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A simple "I do" is all I need, son.

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I, uh…

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You good?

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I, um…

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I wrote these vows… a week ago,

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and they don't quite feel…

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Because you… you're… you're right.

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This week, it put us through the wringer,

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and everything I thought I knew

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about… about love
and… and marriage, it's changed.

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It's all changed.

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And I… I… I understand you now
better than I… I ever have before.

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I… I see now what you were saying.

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What are you doing?

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Marriage destroys people.

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And it was already starting to get to us.

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And you know what? I, um…

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I don't want our relationship to change.

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-Stick to the script.
-What are you doing?

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Marriage has been a poison.

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-Marriage has been-- Stop, okay, I got it.
-You okay?

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It's been a poison in my family,
and I just…

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I pushed you here when you didn't want to.

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What are you doing?

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Rachel, all I want
is to spend the rest of my life with you.

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But I don't want us to be like them.

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I want us to have the privilege of
genuinely choosing each other every day.

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-Like we always have.
-Everyone, it's okay.

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The rental car is taking a hard left,
far away from here.

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-But we're still in the car.
-Mm-mm. Nicky. Look at me. Look at me.

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Marry me. Marry me.
You have to marry me. Right now.

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I'm freeing us from the institution.

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-Are you fucking serious?
-Rachel…

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Are you fucking serious?

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This is what you want.

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-Stop. Oh my God, this is…
-I'm serious.

00:11:24.208 --> 00:11:27.250 align:center
Why don't we just give
the couple some time to sort things out?

00:11:27.333 --> 00:11:29.583 align:center
-No.
-Everybody just stay put.

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Rachel!

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Let's just get the keys, get in the car,
and drive. Fuck all this.

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-Tell me you're not serious.
-Sorry I pushed us here. I'm fixing it.

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This week has been kind of a nightmare.

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What if it was a vision of our future?
I'm not gonna let that happen to us.

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Of course this week was a nightmare.

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It's the week of our wedding.
What do you think that is?

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You were supposed to take
the leap of faith with me.

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-I did. I did. That's what I was doing.
-No!

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That was you hiding behind a philosophy

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and fearing a future
based on other people's bad decisions!

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I was the one putting my confidence in us!

00:12:05.416 --> 00:12:08.166 align:center
-I'm doing the same thing.
-Oh, how is this the same thing?

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You just agreed
that all that matters is us.

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-I'm looking out for us.
-How?

00:12:12.041 --> 00:12:14.375 align:center
I just refuted my family's
whole value system for you!

00:12:14.458 --> 00:12:16.166 align:center
But I didn't ask you to!

00:12:16.250 --> 00:12:19.333 align:center
Okay, but Rach,
I know you never wanted to get married.

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And now I… I see it,
and I finally understand why.

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You have to marry me.
No, we have to get married.

00:12:25.291 --> 00:12:27.916 align:center
Rachel, you've literally always said
you never wanted to get married.

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That was before I knew there was
a marriage curse tied to my bloodline.

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And if you hadn't proposed to me,
we'd be fine, and it's not your fault.

00:12:34.541 --> 00:12:36.291 align:center
Okay, it is not your fault.
You didn't know.

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I didn't know, but now we know,
and now we have to get married.

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That's not a reason to get married.

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It should be because we love each other
and we believe in that.

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I know, but that's not
the fucking situation that we're in now.

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Oh my God. Why are you doing this now?

00:13:02.375 --> 00:13:04.208 align:center
What the fuck, Nicky?

00:13:04.875 --> 00:13:06.333 align:center
Why are you doing this now?

00:13:16.125 --> 00:13:20.000 align:center
Yeah, more. More. More.
Yeah, that, yeah, thank you.

00:13:20.083 --> 00:13:21.708 align:center
That's how much
everyone should be getting.

00:13:21.791 --> 00:13:23.208 align:center
Even the minors. That one's for you.

00:13:23.291 --> 00:13:25.166 align:center
He was in crisis, Victoria.

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He was looking to me for guidance,
and I had to be honest.

00:13:31.916 --> 00:13:33.791 align:center
How was I supposed to know
he'd react like that?

00:13:33.875 --> 00:13:35.458 align:center
Because he idolizes us.

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He thinks we have the perfect marriage.

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We do.

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You ruined my relationship with my son.

00:13:47.166 --> 00:13:50.000 align:center
I will never have the chance
to regain his trust.

00:13:50.083 --> 00:13:53.500 align:center
-No. No, no. He loves you so much.
-You took away my ending.

00:13:53.583 --> 00:13:56.666 align:center
Wait, come back. Victoria.

00:13:58.708 --> 00:14:00.875 align:center
Honey, what happened up there?

00:14:00.958 --> 00:14:04.625 align:center
Are you okay with this?
Is Nicky okay? What do we do?

00:14:04.708 --> 00:14:08.458 align:center
Thank you. It's… it's just a little,
silly disagreement. They will be fine.

00:14:08.541 --> 00:14:12.166 align:center
Can someone do, uh, the rounds?
I don't want anyone thirsty. Cheers.

00:14:12.250 --> 00:14:13.500 align:center
Cheers.

00:14:14.666 --> 00:14:18.125 align:center
Like you mean it. Mommy, hi!
I'm keeping the energy up.

00:14:24.083 --> 00:14:26.750 align:center
Why'd you even propose to me then? Hm?

00:14:27.583 --> 00:14:29.958 align:center
If I've always said
I didn't wanna get married?

00:14:30.041 --> 00:14:32.958 align:center
All it took was you finding out
that your parents' marriage isn't perfect.

00:14:33.041 --> 00:14:34.541 align:center
That's what you needed.

00:14:34.625 --> 00:14:37.916 align:center
To do the thing that I've been saying
I wanted since the day we met.

00:14:39.125 --> 00:14:41.583 align:center
I could have told you
an hour into knowing them, Nicky,

00:14:41.666 --> 00:14:44.041 align:center
that your parents don't have the marriage
you've idolized.

00:14:44.125 --> 00:14:46.375 align:center
Your mother is lovely, yes,
but she's also a narcissist.

00:14:46.458 --> 00:14:48.416 align:center
And your father is a broken romantic

00:14:48.500 --> 00:14:51.250 align:center
who's looking for something
to stuff the rest of himself into.

00:14:51.333 --> 00:14:54.583 align:center
So their marriage only works
because he reveres her.

00:14:54.666 --> 00:14:55.750 align:center
And she needs to be revered.

00:14:55.833 --> 00:14:58.375 align:center
He's completely consumed by her,
and still he's not enough for her.

00:14:58.458 --> 00:15:01.791 align:center
So they're both empty,
and it's depressing to watch.

00:15:01.875 --> 00:15:04.625 align:center
Thanks, Rachel, yeah.
Thanks. Thank you for that.

00:15:04.708 --> 00:15:08.541 align:center
So I guess we both don't wanna end up
like your parents.

00:15:09.083 --> 00:15:13.458 align:center
And, um, just to be clear
in that scenario,

00:15:13.541 --> 00:15:16.291 align:center
I'm the romantic,
and you're the narcissist.

00:15:17.000 --> 00:15:18.833 align:center
Oh. That's nice.

00:15:18.916 --> 00:15:21.083 align:center
Yeah, no, that does make sense actually

00:15:21.166 --> 00:15:25.625 align:center
because our whole relationship
revolves around you.

00:15:25.708 --> 00:15:26.625 align:center
Okay.

00:15:26.708 --> 00:15:30.041 align:center
It's always me reassuring you
that everything's okay,

00:15:30.125 --> 00:15:33.375 align:center
even when there's
literally nothing going on!

00:15:33.458 --> 00:15:36.333 align:center
Because you think
something's always out to get you,

00:15:36.416 --> 00:15:39.000 align:center
so I'm always tiptoeing
around your sensitivities.

00:15:39.083 --> 00:15:39.916 align:center
Okay.

00:15:40.000 --> 00:15:42.708 align:center
-'Cause you can't handle anything.
-I get it. I get it.

00:15:42.791 --> 00:15:45.625 align:center
-Not even one day with my family…
-I get it, Nicky.

00:15:45.708 --> 00:15:47.708 align:center
…without me there,
constantly reassuring you.

00:15:48.708 --> 00:15:52.541 align:center
Every little thing is just
an exhausting puzzle with you.

00:15:52.625 --> 00:15:54.541 align:center
-Nothing is easy.
-I get it.

00:15:54.625 --> 00:15:57.250 align:center
-You're a really hard person to love!
-I know!

00:15:59.416 --> 00:16:00.916 align:center
Okay? I know!

00:16:05.333 --> 00:16:07.000 align:center
Is that what you wanna hear?

00:16:09.708 --> 00:16:10.875 align:center
Oh, fuck.

00:16:26.041 --> 00:16:29.125 align:center
Cheers, everyone.
That's it, bring the cheer.

00:16:30.833 --> 00:16:32.750 align:center
Feel like it was me. It was me.

00:16:32.833 --> 00:16:35.625 align:center
Should we leave? Wait, should we leave?

00:16:35.708 --> 00:16:38.416 align:center
Portia said
the ceremony's gonna resume soon.

00:16:44.375 --> 00:16:46.083 align:center
Why'd you say yes, then?

00:16:48.041 --> 00:16:49.916 align:center
-When I proposed, why'd you say yes?
-Because…

00:16:50.000 --> 00:16:52.166 align:center
Because… because I knew
how much it meant to you,

00:16:52.250 --> 00:16:55.083 align:center
and I… and I… I loved you, and…

00:16:58.833 --> 00:17:03.958 align:center
Nicky, you're, like, the only person
who could have gotten me here.

00:17:04.041 --> 00:17:05.125 align:center
You loved me?

00:17:08.625 --> 00:17:10.375 align:center
Do you not love me anymore?

00:17:12.291 --> 00:17:14.666 align:center
-No. Go away.
-I wanna know her answer.

00:17:14.750 --> 00:17:15.916 align:center
-Get out.
-My God.

00:17:16.000 --> 00:17:18.000 align:center
Mom wants you in there,
kissing and smiling

00:17:18.083 --> 00:17:20.458 align:center
like you didn't slap her in the face
in front of her bloodline

00:17:20.541 --> 00:17:22.500 align:center
and everyone in this world
she loves and respects.

00:17:22.583 --> 00:17:26.041 align:center
-Okay, goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye. Goodbye.
-Ew, your hands are slimy.

00:17:31.750 --> 00:17:35.541 align:center
Yes, Nicky,
of course I love you still, okay?

00:17:35.625 --> 00:17:37.958 align:center
And one of the things
that I love the most about you

00:17:38.041 --> 00:17:40.875 align:center
is that you are a rock,
you are consistent, you are stable,

00:17:40.958 --> 00:17:44.000 align:center
and you don't do things
like dump me at the altar.

00:17:44.083 --> 00:17:45.833 align:center
I wasn't breaking up with you.

00:17:45.916 --> 00:17:49.416 align:center
-I was saving us.
-Oh, good, yeah.

00:17:49.916 --> 00:17:51.250 align:center
Do you think it worked?

00:17:52.625 --> 00:17:54.708 align:center
If you really wanted to save us,

00:17:54.791 --> 00:17:58.375 align:center
you would have said "I do" up there
because I had everything under control.

00:17:58.458 --> 00:17:59.500 align:center
Okay?

00:17:59.583 --> 00:18:06.083 align:center
I had to go through a lot to get up there
and say yes with confidence.

00:18:07.041 --> 00:18:11.500 align:center
And if you don't marry me by sundown,
the curse spreads to you and your family.

00:18:11.583 --> 00:18:16.000 align:center
So, you know, actually, I was saving you.

00:18:17.333 --> 00:18:21.916 align:center
-Oh my God, Rachel. What?
-What do you mean, "what"?

00:18:23.666 --> 00:18:25.250 align:center
Why are you acting shocked?

00:18:30.833 --> 00:18:34.625 align:center
But I mean, haven't you seen
Runaway Bride? It's a classic.

00:18:34.708 --> 00:18:38.166 align:center
Oh, hi, guys. So great to see you.

00:18:38.250 --> 00:18:41.083 align:center
-So cute.
-Okay! Hi…

00:18:41.166 --> 00:18:46.125 align:center
Fuck, I cannot get over it.
Are you shaking? I'm like shaking a bit.

00:18:46.208 --> 00:18:49.625 align:center
I don't wanna say it,
but you owe me $50 each.

00:18:50.125 --> 00:18:52.333 align:center
Oh my gosh. You guys made a bet?

00:18:52.416 --> 00:18:55.875 align:center
After the rehearsal dinner,
it seemed like a safe bet.

00:18:55.958 --> 00:18:58.833 align:center
Technically,
the bet was about her calling it off.

00:18:58.916 --> 00:19:02.375 align:center
-You too?
-What? I like money.

00:19:02.458 --> 00:19:04.250 align:center
You lost the bet.

00:19:06.291 --> 00:19:09.291 align:center
So, it's actually
encrusted with rhinestones, not diamonds.

00:19:09.375 --> 00:19:12.541 align:center
But the back is custom.
Please don't touch, it's fragile.

00:19:14.041 --> 00:19:16.041 align:center
Ugh! This is typical…

00:19:19.125 --> 00:19:21.125 align:center
What the fuck was he thinking?

00:19:21.208 --> 00:19:22.625 align:center
I don't know.

00:19:23.541 --> 00:19:26.625 align:center
-And she didn't drink--
-I don't know.

00:19:36.625 --> 00:19:40.416 align:center
What I'm saying is
that from my perspective,

00:19:40.500 --> 00:19:43.750 align:center
you've been extra on edge
since we got here.

00:19:43.833 --> 00:19:47.208 align:center
And then you told me
something bad was gonna happen.

00:19:47.291 --> 00:19:50.333 align:center
And then you started talking about curses.

00:19:50.416 --> 00:19:53.916 align:center
So can't you see why it made sense to me

00:19:54.000 --> 00:19:56.708 align:center
that you'd be into the idea
of us not getting married?

00:19:57.625 --> 00:20:01.333 align:center
Like, all of that stuff
coming up before our wedding,

00:20:01.416 --> 00:20:04.750 align:center
it had to be caused in part by,
like, the pressure or something.

00:20:04.833 --> 00:20:06.666 align:center
Sorry. Nicky, stop.

00:20:07.875 --> 00:20:08.875 align:center
What?

00:20:09.666 --> 00:20:11.583 align:center
Do you not believe in the curse?

00:20:11.666 --> 00:20:13.041 align:center
Marriage is the curse.

00:20:13.125 --> 00:20:17.041 align:center
-I'm absolving us from that.
-Oh my God, no, Nicky.

00:20:17.125 --> 00:20:21.041 align:center
The curse is the curse.
The absolution was us getting married.

00:20:21.125 --> 00:20:23.458 align:center
Do you think that I, like, made this up?

00:20:23.541 --> 00:20:25.583 align:center
-What?
-I don't think you made it up. I just…

00:20:26.166 --> 00:20:28.833 align:center
What? Tell me what it is, what?

00:20:29.458 --> 00:20:32.791 align:center
What is it, like,
a fear of commitment or stress?

00:20:32.875 --> 00:20:35.541 align:center
-No, I don't… I just…
-What?!

00:20:35.625 --> 00:20:42.333 align:center
I think… both of us
have been cursed in our own ways

00:20:42.416 --> 00:20:44.208 align:center
by the systems that raised us.

00:20:44.291 --> 00:20:45.208 align:center
Oh my God.

00:20:45.291 --> 00:20:48.000 align:center
And by not getting married,
we are fixing that.

00:20:48.083 --> 00:20:51.583 align:center
So when I say that I will die
if you and I are not soulmates,

00:20:51.666 --> 00:20:52.750 align:center
you don't believe me?

00:20:54.708 --> 00:20:56.583 align:center
I don't think… Rachel…

00:20:56.666 --> 00:20:57.750 align:center
What?

00:20:58.541 --> 00:20:59.625 align:center
You don't think what?

00:21:04.625 --> 00:21:06.458 align:center
Yeah, I don't think that would happen.

00:21:09.500 --> 00:21:12.958 align:center
You literally just told me you believe me.
You literally just told me you believe me.

00:21:13.041 --> 00:21:15.958 align:center
Right before I walked down the aisle.
This is crazy. This is crazy.

00:21:16.041 --> 00:21:17.208 align:center
Wait, wait. Hold on, hold on.

00:21:17.291 --> 00:21:19.291 align:center
This is crazy. I can't believe it!

00:21:19.375 --> 00:21:21.666 align:center
-No, no. No, no.
-I didn't mean for it to get like this.

00:21:21.750 --> 00:21:24.208 align:center
You know that I put my confidence in us

00:21:24.291 --> 00:21:26.583 align:center
because I thought that you saw me!

00:21:26.666 --> 00:21:28.625 align:center
I thought that we saw each other.

00:21:28.708 --> 00:21:32.833 align:center
Can we just go back… Can we just go back
to, like, four hours ago, please?

00:21:49.708 --> 00:21:51.875 align:center
I like what I see…

00:21:51.958 --> 00:21:54.833 align:center
Bride's side or groom's?

00:21:55.333 --> 00:21:58.666 align:center
-Groom.
-I knew it. Are you married?

00:21:58.750 --> 00:22:00.833 align:center
-Uh, yeah.
-To each other?

00:22:01.333 --> 00:22:04.875 align:center
-Yeah.
-Do you believe she's your soulmate?

00:22:04.958 --> 00:22:06.583 align:center
Yeah. For sure.

00:22:08.458 --> 00:22:09.708 align:center
For sure.

00:22:09.791 --> 00:22:13.416 align:center
Sorry. Um, we're just gonna go
back… back… back to our table. Let's go.

00:22:13.500 --> 00:22:16.083 align:center
What happens at a wedding reception
where there's no bride or groom?

00:22:16.166 --> 00:22:18.083 align:center
Is that, like, a setup
for one of your bad jokes?

00:22:18.166 --> 00:22:20.833 align:center
-No, honey, it's a genuine question.
-How should I know?

00:22:20.916 --> 00:22:22.541 align:center
-Please, for you, sir.
-No!

00:22:24.416 --> 00:22:25.458 align:center
Hmm.

00:22:26.083 --> 00:22:27.791 align:center
I don't know what you want me to do! I--

00:22:27.875 --> 00:22:30.166 align:center
You don't let me think
independently of you!

00:22:30.250 --> 00:22:33.916 align:center
You don't accept it
when I don't share your exact perspective.

00:22:34.000 --> 00:22:36.208 align:center
I can't change what I believe in.

00:22:36.291 --> 00:22:38.583 align:center
But you can't believe me!

00:22:38.666 --> 00:22:40.750 align:center
-Okay, that's different.
-You can't believe me!

00:22:40.833 --> 00:22:42.500 align:center
-That's different, okay?
-How?

00:22:42.583 --> 00:22:44.833 align:center
I don't believe in,
like, supernatural shit

00:22:44.916 --> 00:22:47.375 align:center
or, like, cosmic retribution or curses.

00:22:47.458 --> 00:22:50.000 align:center
Okay. Well, I don't believe
in fucking aliens,

00:22:50.083 --> 00:22:53.791 align:center
but if you told me that with certainty
that you saw a fucking alien,

00:22:53.875 --> 00:22:55.708 align:center
I would believe you, Nicky.

00:22:56.208 --> 00:22:59.458 align:center
I'm sorry, Rachel. I don't… I-- You don't…

00:22:59.541 --> 00:23:02.750 align:center
You knew this about me, okay?
This isn't, like, new information.

00:23:02.833 --> 00:23:06.666 align:center
What you do… What you do, Nicky,
when you love someone is

00:23:06.750 --> 00:23:10.416 align:center
you believe the person that you love.
That's what trust is.

00:23:10.500 --> 00:23:13.875 align:center
So when you told me
that you believed me, I believed you.

00:23:13.958 --> 00:23:16.833 align:center
Instead of looking at a catalog
of all the things you've said in the past

00:23:16.916 --> 00:23:20.458 align:center
because I am fucking seeing you
in the moment, in every moment,

00:23:20.541 --> 00:23:25.291 align:center
I am looking at you, and you just…
you don't fucking do that for me.

00:23:25.833 --> 00:23:26.750 align:center
You don't.

00:23:26.833 --> 00:23:33.333 align:center
You just… You chose a version of me
a long time ago, and that's all I am, and…

00:23:35.125 --> 00:23:37.833 align:center
…then you get… you get frustrated
when I'm not it

00:23:37.916 --> 00:23:41.041 align:center
because then you don't know who to be,
and you know what? It's bad, Nicky.

00:23:41.125 --> 00:23:42.875 align:center
It's a bad fucking quality

00:23:42.958 --> 00:23:48.541 align:center
because you have made it impossible,
impossible for me to exist!

00:23:54.333 --> 00:23:55.750 align:center
Two tequilas, please.

00:23:57.083 --> 00:23:58.333 align:center
Hmm.

00:23:58.416 --> 00:24:02.041 align:center
-I like your jacket.
-Yeah, thanks.

00:24:02.125 --> 00:24:03.333 align:center
Can I have it?

00:24:09.125 --> 00:24:11.166 align:center
3:45. I'm getting them.

00:24:21.791 --> 00:24:23.375 align:center
Hey.

00:24:25.875 --> 00:24:28.166 align:center
What the fuck is going on in there?

00:24:32.666 --> 00:24:33.708 align:center
Fuckers.

00:24:35.583 --> 00:24:37.375 align:center
Impossible!

00:24:39.291 --> 00:24:40.125 align:center
Let me in.

00:24:40.208 --> 00:24:43.291 align:center
Rachel, the sun sets at 4:44.
That's less than an hour.

00:24:43.375 --> 00:24:45.500 align:center
-What the hell are you doing?
-I need a minute.

00:24:45.583 --> 00:24:49.875 align:center
You're running out of minutes.
I'm getting the master key. Dickheads.

00:24:55.291 --> 00:24:58.791 align:center
At first I was afraid, I was petrified

00:24:58.875 --> 00:25:02.875 align:center
Kept thinkin' I could never live
Without you by my side

00:25:02.958 --> 00:25:07.291 align:center
But then I spent so many nights
Thinkin' how you did me wrong…

00:25:08.125 --> 00:25:12.083 align:center
There's my boy! Jude, come, come,
come, come, come. Come on. Come on.

00:25:14.500 --> 00:25:18.375 align:center
If you weren't… if you weren't cursed,
would you still have said yes?

00:25:18.958 --> 00:25:20.791 align:center
Oh my God, that's irrelevant!

00:25:20.875 --> 00:25:21.958 align:center
It's like asking me,

00:25:22.041 --> 00:25:25.666 align:center
"Oh, do you think you'd be right-handed
if you had no fucking arms?"

00:25:28.208 --> 00:25:30.083 align:center
Well, I still want an answer.

00:25:31.791 --> 00:25:33.916 align:center
Just turn around now…

00:25:34.000 --> 00:25:36.083 align:center
You have nothing to say.
You know what, Nicky?

00:25:36.166 --> 00:25:38.250 align:center
But actually,
you were just babied by your mother

00:25:38.333 --> 00:25:40.250 align:center
and sheltered from
the entire fucking world,

00:25:40.333 --> 00:25:44.291 align:center
so you know nothing
about the real world, Nicky. Nothing.

00:25:44.375 --> 00:25:47.458 align:center
Oh, no, not I, I will survive…

00:25:47.541 --> 00:25:49.916 align:center
…an evil person.
I think your brain should be studied.

00:25:50.000 --> 00:25:52.291 align:center
God, that was, like,
two fucking years ago, Nicky.

00:25:52.375 --> 00:25:55.458 align:center
Okay, well, I would never disappear on you
for a fucking week.

00:25:55.541 --> 00:25:57.583 align:center
I'll survive…

00:25:57.666 --> 00:25:59.083 align:center
Go smoke some weed about it.

00:25:59.166 --> 00:26:00.541 align:center
You think you're a romantic?

00:26:00.625 --> 00:26:02.375 align:center
Hey, hey

00:26:03.791 --> 00:26:05.291 align:center
Stoop to my level?

00:26:09.250 --> 00:26:11.625 align:center
You're the most manipulative
fucking person I've--

00:26:17.666 --> 00:26:21.208 align:center
It took all the strength I had
Not to fall apart

00:26:21.291 --> 00:26:25.333 align:center
Kept tryin' hard
To mend the pieces of my broken heart

00:26:25.416 --> 00:26:29.583 align:center
And I spent oh-so many nights
Just feelin' sorry for myself…

00:26:32.041 --> 00:26:33.083 align:center
Oh my God.

00:26:33.166 --> 00:26:35.666 align:center
-I knew you would ruin the wedding.
-I didn't, Portia.

00:26:35.750 --> 00:26:40.833 align:center
I… I know that this has been a tough week,
but whatever problems you two are having,

00:26:40.916 --> 00:26:44.583 align:center
I… I promise you will be able
to work it out, okay?

00:26:44.666 --> 00:26:46.041 align:center
But now is not the time.

00:26:46.125 --> 00:26:48.208 align:center
-Just let them do what they need to do.
-Nope, not now.

00:26:48.291 --> 00:26:50.666 align:center
They have to get married, Dad.
They have to.

00:26:50.750 --> 00:26:53.625 align:center
-What happened out there, man?
-I don't need this right now.

00:26:53.708 --> 00:26:56.416 align:center
None of us need this right now.
Grow up and get married.

00:26:56.500 --> 00:26:58.458 align:center
-What the hell are you doing?
-Get out of my way.

00:26:58.541 --> 00:26:59.625 align:center
-Hey.
-You didn't drink it?

00:27:00.833 --> 00:27:03.000 align:center
No, I… I put my faith in him.

00:27:03.083 --> 00:27:04.166 align:center
Why would you do that?

00:27:04.250 --> 00:27:06.083 align:center
-Because I was 98%.
-Sorry, drink what?

00:27:06.166 --> 00:27:08.666 align:center
What the fuck are you doing?
Look at her. Marry her.

00:27:08.750 --> 00:27:10.541 align:center
Who cares about
your brand-new life philosophy?

00:27:10.625 --> 00:27:13.500 align:center
-Marry her, or we're all fucked!
-And, uh, drink what, Nell?

00:27:13.583 --> 00:27:15.791 align:center
Oh, shut up, Portia.
You have to get married.

00:27:15.875 --> 00:27:17.833 align:center
-Oh, what, because of the curse?
-Yes!

00:27:18.416 --> 00:27:20.458 align:center
-He doesn't believe in it.
-Oh, it's real.

00:27:20.541 --> 00:27:22.750 align:center
And if you don't marry her,
it spreads to our family.

00:27:22.833 --> 00:27:24.541 align:center
That means
Jude's gonna have it too, right?

00:27:24.625 --> 00:27:26.666 align:center
-What do you mean? All of us?
-Yes.

00:27:26.750 --> 00:27:27.791 align:center
I don't understand.

00:27:27.875 --> 00:27:30.291 align:center
All right, everybody just calm down.

00:27:36.208 --> 00:27:38.833 align:center
Sweetheart. Hey.

00:27:39.916 --> 00:27:42.375 align:center
You didn't mean
what you said out there, did you?

00:27:53.750 --> 00:27:55.041 align:center
I was…

00:27:56.833 --> 00:27:59.625 align:center
-I was just trying to do the right thing.
-You have five minutes.

00:27:59.708 --> 00:28:01.083 align:center
Jules!

00:28:01.791 --> 00:28:06.541 align:center
Okay, come on. Let's go.
Dad, get ready to say your thing.

00:28:07.875 --> 00:28:09.541 align:center
-Let's go get that witness.
-Stop it, Jules.

00:28:09.625 --> 00:28:11.791 align:center
-Why aren't any of you moving?
-I'm moving…

00:28:12.333 --> 00:28:14.833 align:center
Rachel, come on. Rachel, come on.

00:28:14.916 --> 00:28:19.250 align:center
Okay, let's just go out there
and… and finish the ceremony. You know?

00:28:19.833 --> 00:28:21.708 align:center
You have no reason to be embarrassed.

00:28:22.500 --> 00:28:24.000 align:center
No one's mad.

00:28:26.125 --> 00:28:27.625 align:center
Sweetheart, look at me.

00:28:30.125 --> 00:28:31.666 align:center
Everything's gonna be okay.

00:28:34.541 --> 00:28:35.583 align:center
Come on.

00:28:48.083 --> 00:28:50.416 align:center
I'm so sorry. Hey.

00:28:52.500 --> 00:28:55.000 align:center
Should we try again? Do you wanna…

00:28:55.083 --> 00:28:56.875 align:center
Do you wanna go back out there
and try again?

00:28:56.958 --> 00:28:58.708 align:center
What do you say? What do you say?

00:28:59.208 --> 00:29:00.541 align:center
Rachel, should we…

00:29:04.250 --> 00:29:05.458 align:center
What do you say?

00:29:13.208 --> 00:29:14.458 align:center
No.

00:29:16.166 --> 00:29:17.458 align:center
No, Nicky.

00:29:18.583 --> 00:29:20.125 align:center
I'm not gonna marry you.

00:29:24.083 --> 00:29:30.208 align:center
Oh, when will I stop
Stop, stop, stop loving you, baby?

00:29:30.750 --> 00:29:35.375 align:center
-No, no, never, no, never, no, yeah
-Never, never

00:29:35.458 --> 00:29:38.666 align:center
When the ocean's as dry as sand

00:29:39.166 --> 00:29:42.916 align:center
When I can hold the world
In the palm of one hand

00:29:43.000 --> 00:29:46.666 align:center
When we can take a walk to the moon

00:29:46.750 --> 00:29:51.333 align:center
When I can place the world
And its people in one room…

00:29:51.416 --> 00:29:53.541 align:center
-What are you doing?
-I'm not gonna fucking die for him.

00:29:53.625 --> 00:29:56.125 align:center
You're not gonna die.
You said you believe he was your soulmate.

00:29:56.208 --> 00:29:57.791 align:center
-Well, I don't.
-Rachel, come on.

00:29:57.875 --> 00:30:00.666 align:center
-Please do this one thing for me.
-This one thing? This one thing?

00:30:00.750 --> 00:30:04.916 align:center
Nicky, I did all of this for you.
I did all of this for you.

00:30:05.000 --> 00:30:06.458 align:center
I said yes to the proposal for you.

00:30:06.541 --> 00:30:09.000 align:center
I said yes up there because
I believed in you, but I'm done.

00:30:09.083 --> 00:30:10.375 align:center
I'm done, okay?

00:30:10.458 --> 00:30:12.750 align:center
I'm not gonna betray myself
for you anymore.

00:30:12.833 --> 00:30:16.125 align:center
I deserve a second chance.
I deserve a second chance.

00:30:16.208 --> 00:30:18.625 align:center
-Rachel. Come on.
-Don't do this, please.

00:30:18.708 --> 00:30:20.916 align:center
All you had to do was believe me, Nicky.

00:30:22.208 --> 00:30:23.541 align:center
Fuck, it's 4:45.

00:30:23.625 --> 00:30:27.625 align:center
-Full-time groover
-Full-time groover

00:30:28.375 --> 00:30:29.625 align:center
I'll…

00:30:30.416 --> 00:30:32.833 align:center
Oh, I'll be your baby

00:31:15.250 --> 00:31:16.291 align:center
Oh my God.

00:33:51.458 --> 00:33:54.375 align:center
Jude! Jude!

00:33:57.541 --> 00:34:01.416 align:center
What do we do? What do we do?

00:34:02.125 --> 00:34:04.208 align:center
I don't know. I don't know.

00:34:04.291 --> 00:34:05.666 align:center
I can't hear you!

00:34:05.750 --> 00:34:08.750 align:center
I'll… I'll figure it out, okay?
I'm gonna… Fuck, where is he?

00:34:14.041 --> 00:34:15.375 align:center
-Zander?
-Baby?

00:34:18.791 --> 00:34:21.250 align:center
You're okay. You're okay.
Just sit right here.

00:34:21.333 --> 00:34:23.333 align:center
Mama! Mama!

00:34:26.666 --> 00:34:28.083 align:center
Look out!

00:34:52.458 --> 00:34:55.083 align:center
You! Look.

00:34:55.166 --> 00:34:56.125 align:center
Sorry. You're okay.

00:34:56.208 --> 00:34:57.958 align:center
Just put pressure on it.
You're gonna be fine.

00:34:58.041 --> 00:35:02.375 align:center
Honey, what the hell is happening
to your family? Oh my God!

00:35:02.458 --> 00:35:04.500 align:center
Close your eyes, son. Close your eyes.

00:35:04.583 --> 00:35:06.000 align:center
Hey! You!

00:35:06.083 --> 00:35:09.250 align:center
This is what you meant? Why didn't
you fucking tell me this would happen?

00:35:09.333 --> 00:35:13.666 align:center
I warned you. I told you
it would spread to his bloodline.

00:35:37.708 --> 00:35:39.125 align:center
Mom, no.

00:35:39.208 --> 00:35:41.333 align:center
I knew that bitch was satanic
from the second I saw her.

00:35:41.416 --> 00:35:44.083 align:center
-No one listens to me.
-No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

00:35:45.416 --> 00:35:46.541 align:center
What's happening?

00:35:48.291 --> 00:35:51.166 align:center
It'll be okay. Huh? You're okay.

00:36:16.666 --> 00:36:18.291 align:center
-Lock the door.
-Okay.

00:36:18.375 --> 00:36:20.833 align:center
And don't let anyone in
but me and Nellie, got it?

00:36:20.916 --> 00:36:21.833 align:center
Okay.

00:36:24.458 --> 00:36:27.125 align:center
-Keep the TV on loud.
-Super Bowl LX, Patriots--

00:36:34.000 --> 00:36:37.000 align:center
I love you.
And I won't let anything happen to you.

00:36:38.833 --> 00:36:40.000 align:center
I'll be right back. I promise.

00:36:40.083 --> 00:36:43.541 align:center
It's gonna be an absolute
bloodbath as Seahawks take the field.

00:36:54.500 --> 00:36:57.166 align:center
Okay, listen. This fucking curse
spread to our bloodline.

00:36:57.250 --> 00:36:58.875 align:center
That's gonna happen to me?

00:36:58.958 --> 00:37:01.000 align:center
Not if you think
your Vegas husband's your soulmate.

00:37:01.083 --> 00:37:02.750 align:center
You got married?

00:37:03.333 --> 00:37:06.208 align:center
Mom, I'm so sorry. It was a mistake.
I never should have done it.

00:37:11.916 --> 00:37:13.833 align:center
-Mom? Mom? Forgive me.
-This isn't happening.

00:37:13.916 --> 00:37:16.625 align:center
It is happening,
and it's your fault, you stupid shit.

00:37:16.708 --> 00:37:18.375 align:center
All you had to do was marry her.

00:37:18.458 --> 00:37:21.125 align:center
This all happened
because you didn't marry her.

00:37:21.708 --> 00:37:23.875 align:center
I think there's something
we can do to stop it.

00:37:25.291 --> 00:37:27.541 align:center
-Guys, what do we do?
-Sweetie, we're getting help.

00:37:27.625 --> 00:37:29.250 align:center
I'm sorry. It was a mistake.

00:37:29.333 --> 00:37:31.125 align:center
Why didn't you sign the divorce papers?

00:37:31.208 --> 00:37:33.083 align:center
I don't know
what my life looks like without you.

00:37:33.166 --> 00:37:35.125 align:center
-Oh my God!
-Am I bleeding?

00:37:35.208 --> 00:37:36.416 align:center
Not yet.

00:38:18.166 --> 00:38:22.083 align:center
Rach. Rachel, Rachel, Rachel, I'm sorry.

00:38:22.166 --> 00:38:24.041 align:center
I'm so sorry. I totally fucked up.

00:38:24.125 --> 00:38:26.083 align:center
And I'm so, so sorry.

00:38:26.166 --> 00:38:30.083 align:center
I believe you're my soulmate,
and I'm yours. We're soulmates.

00:38:35.791 --> 00:38:37.375 align:center
You believe me now?

00:38:38.958 --> 00:38:40.166 align:center
I do.

00:38:41.750 --> 00:38:42.916 align:center
I do.

00:38:43.000 --> 00:38:44.416 align:center
I promise.

00:38:45.208 --> 00:38:49.375 align:center
I promise I'll always believe you
from now on, I promise.

00:38:49.958 --> 00:38:52.125 align:center
-I promise.
-No, Nicky.

00:38:52.208 --> 00:38:56.083 align:center
By the power vested in me,
I now pronounce you husband and wife.

00:38:56.583 --> 00:38:58.208 align:center
You may now kiss the bride.

00:39:00.458 --> 00:39:01.916 align:center
Rachel.

00:39:03.041 --> 00:39:03.875 align:center
Rachel.

00:39:03.958 --> 00:39:07.416 align:center
No, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

00:39:07.500 --> 00:39:09.541 align:center
No! No! He can't sign that.

00:39:09.625 --> 00:39:12.083 align:center
You already said your vows.

00:39:12.166 --> 00:39:15.000 align:center
-They wanted to complete the ceremony.
-Hurry up, please!

00:39:15.083 --> 00:39:17.750 align:center
No, but the curse already spread,
so this is not gonna stop it, right?

00:39:18.333 --> 00:39:20.125 align:center
It won't stop it. Nicky.

00:39:20.708 --> 00:39:23.000 align:center
Nicky. Nicky. We… Look at me.

00:39:23.083 --> 00:39:27.875 align:center
We both have the fucking curse now.
Getting married is only gonna kill us.

00:39:28.916 --> 00:39:31.250 align:center
-Not if we're soulmates.
-We're not.

00:39:31.833 --> 00:39:33.416 align:center
I still think you're mine.

00:39:41.541 --> 00:39:42.500 align:center
Jules…

00:39:42.583 --> 00:39:44.708 align:center
We had to try to save everyone.

00:39:46.166 --> 00:39:50.708 align:center
My son has it. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, Rachel. I'm sorry.

00:39:50.791 --> 00:39:52.791 align:center
You…

00:39:54.458 --> 00:39:56.791 align:center
We're still soulmates, right?

00:39:57.458 --> 00:39:58.458 align:center
Right?

00:40:05.041 --> 00:40:06.833 align:center
I'm so sorry.

00:40:08.583 --> 00:40:10.875 align:center
-Sorry, Rach.
-Rachel.

00:40:21.375 --> 00:40:22.833 align:center
No, Rachel.

00:40:23.333 --> 00:40:28.083 align:center
Rachel, wait, wait. Jules, what did--
You said… you said it would work.

00:40:28.166 --> 00:40:31.791 align:center
-Why didn't it work?
-It's too late. I'm sorry.

00:42:33.500 --> 00:42:35.291 align:center
You're okay, baby girl.

00:42:35.375 --> 00:42:40.041 align:center
It's okay. It's okay.
It's okay. It's okay.

00:42:44.166 --> 00:42:46.375 align:center
You're okay.

00:44:36.833 --> 00:44:38.125 align:center
For me?

00:44:41.291 --> 00:44:44.375 align:center
Finally, you've come for me.

00:45:35.500 --> 00:45:37.541 align:center
Why isn't it happening to you?

00:49:04.958 --> 00:49:06.541 align:center
Do you know where my lighter is?

00:49:27.875 --> 00:49:31.041 align:center
It's okay. It's okay.

00:49:33.166 --> 00:49:34.208 align:center
Jude.

00:49:49.875 --> 00:49:54.625 align:center
I'm so sorry
that this happened to you, okay?

00:49:55.291 --> 00:49:56.958 align:center
But remember that…

00:50:00.666 --> 00:50:02.041 align:center
it did happen.

00:50:03.625 --> 00:50:06.375 align:center
So don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

00:50:06.458 --> 00:50:09.250 align:center
You're gonna be okay. Yeah?

00:50:10.166 --> 00:50:11.000 align:center
Listen to me.

00:50:12.625 --> 00:50:18.791 align:center
You have to be really, really, really,
really careful who you choose to marry.

00:50:19.708 --> 00:50:22.583 align:center
But don't worry.
I'll be there to witness, okay?

00:50:22.666 --> 00:50:24.041 align:center
Okay.

00:50:35.166 --> 00:50:36.208 align:center
Okay.

00:50:38.708 --> 00:50:40.000 align:center
I'll see you later.

00:54:08.833 --> 00:54:11.625 align:center
You just stepped into the main track

00:54:12.875 --> 00:54:15.375 align:center
Climbed down off the fence

00:54:17.791 --> 00:54:20.000 align:center
Words are your weapon

00:54:21.083 --> 00:54:23.500 align:center
Lies are your defense

00:54:25.833 --> 00:54:27.833 align:center
I know what you want

00:54:29.375 --> 00:54:31.750 align:center
And I see what you see

00:54:34.000 --> 00:54:36.375 align:center
You're looking for somebody

00:54:38.208 --> 00:54:39.916 align:center
But he isn't me

00:54:40.000 --> 00:54:42.333 align:center
Find yourself another

00:54:47.791 --> 00:54:51.000 align:center
We will not be lovers

00:54:57.166 --> 00:55:00.416 align:center
Now your eyes are like torches

00:55:01.750 --> 00:55:04.208 align:center
Your presence is bliss

00:55:05.916 --> 00:55:07.916 align:center
I never knew time

00:55:09.000 --> 00:55:12.166 align:center
Could speed and zip like this

00:55:15.125 --> 00:55:17.666 align:center
The touch of your flesh

00:55:19.250 --> 00:55:21.375 align:center
Is tough to resist

00:55:23.666 --> 00:55:27.166 align:center
Planets collide, collide, collide

00:55:27.250 --> 00:55:29.000 align:center
At the smack of your kiss

00:55:29.083 --> 00:55:32.000 align:center
But you can kiss your brother

00:55:42.291 --> 00:55:48.958 align:center
Because we will not be lovers, no

00:56:02.666 --> 00:56:05.083 align:center
Now you're pulling down curtains

00:56:07.166 --> 00:56:09.583 align:center
Sparking old flames

00:56:11.166 --> 00:56:13.625 align:center
Causing disturbance

00:56:15.666 --> 00:56:17.625 align:center
Crying for shame

00:56:19.708 --> 00:56:22.083 align:center
Rapping on doors

00:56:23.583 --> 00:56:25.625 align:center
Abusing my name

00:56:27.583 --> 00:56:30.083 align:center
Casting up doubt

00:56:31.625 --> 00:56:37.291 align:center
Throwing your blame
But you can throw it at your mother

00:56:43.291 --> 00:56:44.875 align:center
At your mother

00:56:47.250 --> 00:56:53.833 align:center
Because we will not be lovers

00:57:23.541 --> 00:57:26.083 align:center
Now the world's full of trouble

00:57:27.958 --> 00:57:29.416 align:center
Everybody's scared

00:57:32.166 --> 00:57:34.166 align:center
Landlords are frowning

00:57:36.291 --> 00:57:38.125 align:center
Cupboards are bare

00:57:40.166 --> 00:57:42.208 align:center
People are scrambling

00:57:42.291 --> 00:57:43.791 align:center
People are scrambling

00:57:43.875 --> 00:57:46.000 align:center
Like dogs for a share

00:57:46.083 --> 00:57:48.083 align:center
Like dogs for a share

00:57:48.166 --> 00:57:50.208 align:center
It's cruel and it's hard

00:57:51.833 --> 00:57:57.291 align:center
But it nothing compared to
What we do to each other

00:58:03.625 --> 00:58:05.500 align:center
To each other
compared to
What we do to each other