[upbeat music playing]
[Ross] Attention surrounding Vince McMahon
and Triple H's personal vendetta is at the boiling point.
-[crashes] -[Ross] Oh my God!
Vince McMahon!
Vince McMahon has rammed the DX limo!
-[Lawler] What's he doing? -[crashes]
[Ross] Vince McMahon has rammed the DX limo!
-[tires screeching] -[crashes]
[Ross] Has Vince McMahon lost his mind?
[Lawler] Vince, DX is inside there!
[Ross] Oh my God. Vince has--
-Vince has lost his mind! -[shatters]
[Ross] DX is running for their lives!
-[grunts] -[Ross] McMahon with a ball bat
has destroyed the DX limo.
[Ross] Vince McMahon is demanding that DX come out of that locker room.
-Vince McMahon, look at his eyes! -[Lawler] He has gone crazy, JR.
[Ross] Vince McMahon has lost it.
-Mr. McMahon, you are under arrest. -What?
-[Lawler] Oh! -[Ross] Vince is under arrest?
[Lawler] Oh! Look at that! Helmsley!
[Ross] Vince McMahon with the handcuffs on.
-Look at Helmsley… -[grunting]
…assaulting a handcuffed Vince McMahon.
[Lawler] Are they taking Vince to jail? What are they doing?
[Triple H] Vince McMahon, if you are sitting in jail right now
wondering who pressed charges,
I pressed charges…
-[Cole] Oh, no. -…and I sent your ass to the pokey.
One thing that you don't do,
you don't cross the boss.
You are going to be released.
Don't go back to the arena.
-[Ross] Oh, wait a minute. -[Lawler] Look at this. It's Vince!
[Ross] Vince McMahon!
Vince McMahon with a chair onto the back of the spine!
[Lawler] What?
[crowd cheering]
[Ross] He threw Helmsley right off the stage!
-[Lawler] What? -[Ross] That's got to be 15 or 20 feet
to the concrete.
But McMahon's family…
[man] …it has escalated beyond personal.
[suspenseful music playing]
-How are you feeling? -I'm sore, I'm all busted up inside.
You ought to. What was it, 20, 30, 40 foot?
-That stupid son of a-- -He could have killed you.
Throwing me off that thing. I tell you what, McMahon is gonna pay for that.
I'm telling you right now, when he gets in,
this is gonna be the worst Thanksgiving of his damn life.
When he gets here, I'll point which one McMahon out is to you, all right?
And you go down there and give it to him.
[WWE theme music playing]
[fireworks exploding]
[crowd cheering]
[Cole] So you say you've had your fill of turkey,
and boring football games are just a memory.
Well, how about a breath of fresh air?
Sit back and enjoy a very special Thanksgiving presentation
of WWE SmackDown on UPN.
Michael Cole, Jerry "The King" or is it "The Pilgrim" Lawler at ringside.
[Lawler] Oh, yeah.
[crowd cheering]
[Ross] Ladies and gentlemen,
he is 7'2", 500 pounds.
Please welcome the World Wrestling Entertainment Champion,
-The Big Show! -[crowd cheering]
[The Big Show's theme music plays]
[Cole] Happy Thanksgiving, everybody,
as the World Wrestling Entertainment Champion, The Big Show,
kicks us off on SmackDown.
And, King, I think it's gonna be an unpredictable night.
We saw at the top of the show,
DX not experiencing holiday cheer,
waiting on the arrival of Vince McMahon.
[Lawler] Well, you know, Vince snapped,
and now I just have to think it's time for DX to snap.
This could be a very unpredictable night,
very explosive, Michael.
[Cole] Vince McMahon was arrested, humiliated on Raw.
He came back to the arena
-tossing Triple H off the stage. -[Lawler] Oh!
[Cole] DX not in a holiday mood tonight on SmackDown.
Well, Big Show, in a short time, you have accomplished more
than most competitors do in an entire career.
You are the World Wrestling Entertainment Champion.
How does it feel to be standing at the top of the mountain?
Uh, it's-- JR, it's incredible. And I got to be honest with you,
right now, I feel like the luckiest man on Earth.
You know, the WWE Title is the most coveted title
in all of sports entertainment
and for me, The Big Show, to have the WWE Title
means more to me than anything in the world.
And that's why, you know,
the only thing is, I just wish my dad was here to see it.
-[Y2J's theme music playing] -[crowd cheering]
-[Lawler] Wait a minute. -[Cole] Uh-oh. That's Y2J music.
[Lawler] I don't think The Big Show was through with his interview there.
-[crowd cheering] -[Cole] Watch it.
-[Lawler] Oh! -[crowd cheering]
[Cole] What is Chris Jericho doing here?
I mean, he already smashed Chyna's thumb with a hammer last week.
[Lawler] Yeah, and he is lucky she didn't press charges.
[Cole] Chyna didn't press charges.
She did have that thumb surgically repaired late last week.
And Y2J now…
[Lawler] Ha. Look at that.
…out here, messing up The Big Show's interview.
You know, Big Show…
you don't have to worry about not having a father anymore
because tonight, I am your daddy.
-[Lawler] What? -[crowd cheering]
-[muffled] Oh? Is that so? -[Cole] Oh, boy.
Do you really think you deserve to be a Heavyweight Champion
just because you're over 7 feet tall?
Because like your girlfriend tells you,
-size doesn't matter. -[Lawler] Uh-oh.
What matters is charisma and showmanship,
both of which you have absolutely none of.
What you deserve to be doing
is carrying my bags into the arena
and begging me not to kick
your dimpled cottage cheese ass.
-[crowd cheering] -[Lawler] Oh, my.
So what I want from you tonight
is a no-BS excuse,
no rule, no disqualification, Heavyweight Championship match.
-[Lawler] What? Tonight? -[Cole] Whoa.
Because what I want
and what all these Jerichoholics want
is that belt,
which you can't even fit around your chubby gut,
around this gorgeous and sexy waist.
[crowd cheering]
You know, Chris, me being a fighting champion,
tonight, right now, I have no problems with beating you
-like the little [bleep] you are. -[Lawler] Whoa!
-[Cole] Big Show accepted the challenge. -[Lawler] Oh, wait!
Is this gonna happen right now?
You got to be kidding me.
-What a way to start SmackDown. -[Cole] Oh, man!
And here we go, the World Wrestling Entertainment Championship is on the line.
Anything goes, no DQ,
and look at The Big Show taking it to Y2J.
-What a way to kick off SmackDown, King. -[Lawler] Right.
It started with The Big Show getting smacked in the face by Y2J.
[Cole] And look out now, Jericho through the second rope
out to ringside,
and The Big Show, the World Wrestling Entertainment Champion, is in pursuit.
[Lawler] I think Y2J may be having some second thoughts right now.
-What's he gonna do? -[Cole] Look at Y2J now. Oh, my!
Oh, a kick through the rope, knocked Big Show once, now over the--
-[Lawler] Yikes! -[Cole] Big Show caught him.
-[Lawler] Unbelievable. -[Cole] What strength
by the World Wrestling Entertainment Champion,
and he tossed him in over the top rope.
[Lawler] Right back where he came from.
[Cole] He is 7'2", 500 pounds
and what a kick to the midsection of Y2J.
[Lawler] I'll tell you, Chris Jericho may have a ton of charisma,
but he better have a ton of talent
and a lot of fight in that body to back it up.
Is that what you want?
-[Lawler] Oh, no. -[Cole] The Big Show with that huge boot
up underneath the chin of Chris Jericho,
and a low blow by Y2J drops the champion to his knees.
[Lawler] No disqualification, Michael, anything goes. Wow!
[Cole] Jericho drop-kick, missile drop-kick to the back of the head.
You're right, King, no DQ in this one.
World Wrestling Entertainment Title is on the line.
Jericho, knee to the face, there's another one,
and The Big Show in trouble here.
[Lawler] As long as Jericho can keep-- Wup, I spoke too soon,
he can't keep him down on the mat.
And look at the strength of the 500-pound Big Show,
Jericho about to be a cruise missile here.
-Now, here we go! -[Cole] Oh, no.
[crowd cheering]
[Cole] And here it comes.
-Wait a minute. -[Lawler] Speaking of "here he comes."
[Cole] He's the Number One Contender, The Big Boss Man,
a serious issue with The Big Show brewing for weeks.
-[Lawler] Look out. -[Cole] And Boss Man,
The Big Show grabbed his hand.
And a shot with the right hand.
-[Lawler] He's got The Boss Man. -[crowd cheering]
[Cole] The Big Show after the Number One Contender,
they're battling outside the ring.
The Show finally getting his hands on The Boss Man.
[Lawler] How long has he been waiting for this?
[Cole] Uh-oh, look out. Look who's coming, King.
-[Lawler] It's Chyna! -[Cole] Chyna and Miss Kitty.
[Lawler] What the--
[Cole] Oh, Y2J, look out.
Chyna may not have pressed charges,
she may be taking the law into her own hands.
[Lawler] Well, she's only got one good hand right now,
but that may be enough for The Ninth Wonder of the World.
What are they gonna do? Oh, baby.
Here, kitty, kitty, kitty.
[Cole] Chyna is the Intercontinental Champion.
Jericho snapped after losing to Chyna at Survivor Series,
and Y2J wanted some,
-and Chyna does as well. -[Lawler] She's--
-Oh! -[Cole] And Chyna-- Chyna with the hammer!
Payback, payback to Jericho.
[Lawler] She hit him with a hammer on the head.
[Cole] Payback by Chyna.
And, King, you know what they say, payback is a…
[Lawler] Yeah.
Right now, Chris Jericho with a hammer hit flat out in the ring.
[Cole] What a roller coaster ride already
on this Thanksgiving Day edition of SmackDown.
Uh-oh, and The Big Show now back.
Keep in mind, there is no disqualifications in this matchup.
-[Lawler] This match is still going? -[Cole] It's still going on,
the championship is on the line.
Y2J in deep trouble here.
[Lawler] Oh, you're not kidding!
[Cole] Over 8 feet in the air, The Big Show,
chokeslam!
-Hooks the leg. -[crowd] One, two, three!
-[Cole] The Show retains the title. -[bell rings]
[crowd cheering]
[announcer] Here is your winner
and still World Wrestling Entertainment Champion,
The Big Show!
[Lawler] Unbelievable, Michael.
[Cole] The Big Show retains the title.
Jericho wanted it, he got it.
The Big Show picks up the win.
-[Lawler] And look at this. -[Cole] King, they're preparing
for that traditional WWE Thanksgiving feast.
Can you imagine how much food it's gonna take
to feed all these Superstars?
[Lawler] Hell, I think that's The Big Show's table alone.
[Cole] Hey, wait a minute.
[Triple H] You can wait there. The moment the flash appears…
There he is, the first one getting out.
-[man] Mr. McMahon? -Whoa, whoa, what's this? What's this?
Mr. McMahon, I'm here to serve you a TOP-- temporary order of protection.
If you come within 50 feet of DX, you will be arrested.
-What? Who the hell are you? -I'm from the court.
I'll explain it to you right now.
That says you can't be within 50 feet of us.
And I'd say right now, you are whole lot closer than that,
so get your ass to steppin'.
-That's crazy. -[man laughing]
This is the biggest crap law I've ever seen in my life.
-[Triple H] Fifty feet! -[Vince] I can't believe this.
-Fifty-foot step. -What a man!
What a tough guy you are, huh?
You're real tough, aren't you, huh?
DX is real tough, a temporary order of protection.
You need protection? You need protection?
Just relax, just relax.
-What a tough guy. -What are you gonna do?
-What a tough guy! -It's 50 feet.
-A real tough guy. -Fifty feet is not that big.
I can't believe it, he's supposed to be a tough guy.
Vince, Vince, what happened out there?
Mr. McMahon, what's a temporary order of protection?
What-- what's that?
-Well… -What does it mean, Vince?
I-- I'll tell you what it means.
What it means is, tonight,
The Outlaws are gonna defend the Tag Team Championship.
That's what it means.
They're gonna defend the Tag Team Championship
against The Hardys,
and they're gonna defend the title inside a steel cage.
-Right. -That's what it means.
Now I'll tell you something else.
Now then. You know what it means to Triple H and X-Pac?
I will tell you what a temporary order of protection means to them.
It means that X-Pac and Triple H
are gonna have to face in a Tag Team Match…
-Shane and Test. -All right.
That's what a temporary order of protection is.
[overlapping chatter]
[man] I love it.
[Ross] Ladies and gentlemen, right now, it gives me great pleasure to introduce
in our audience, wrestling legend Mae Young
and World Wrestling Entertainment Hall of Famer,
-The Fabulous Moolah! -[Lawler] What?
-[Cole] King, turn around. -[Lawler] Wait a minute.
-[Cole] They're behind you. Hi, Moolah. -[Lawler] What are you two doing here?
-[Cole] Hi, Mae. -[Lawler] She's drinking.
-What's that in her hand? -She's drinking. She--
-She's in a turkey outfit. -[Lawler] Sit down.
She's gonna spoil the whole show like she did Stephanie's bridal shower.
-[Cole] King, it's the holiday season. -[Lawler] She's drunk.
She's dressed like a turkey and she's drinking Wild Turkey.
[announcer] The following contest is scheduled for one fall.
Making his way to the ring, from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania,
weighing in at 237 pounds,
the only Olympic gold medal winner
to grace the World Wrestling Entertainment ring
and the only real athlete in the WWE,
Kurt Angle!
[Cole] Well, King, as Kurt Angle makes his way to the ring,
you just heard, what a shocker.
The New Age Outlaws are gonna have to defend
the Tag Team Titles tonight against The Hardys
-in a Steel Cage Match. -[Lawler] Steel Cage Match.
Oh, what a match that's gonna be.
[Cole] And what about Triple H having to team with X-Pac
to take on Shane-- Hello, Kurt, how are you doing?
-Hello, Kurt. Good to see you. -[indistinct]
All right. Better leave them with me, Kurt.
Kurt Angle is gonna leave us his Olympic gold medal here.
Hey, Mae Young is drunk, anything can happen.
[Cole] Kurt Angle winning the gold in the 1996 Olympics
in Freestyle Competition.
It's a time for us to be thankful
for the many gifts that we've received throughout our lives.
[Lawler] That's right.
For instance, I am thankful
for the incredible talent that I have been blessed with.
-[Cole] Can't argue with that. -But more importantly,
I am thankful for the three I's.
My simple set of rules that have brought me success
since the day I was born.
[Lawler] Listen to this, Michael. You got to love the "three 'I' credo."
-Listen to the crowd. -[crowd cheering]
[Cole] Please.
They are intensity,
integrity…
-and intelligence. -[Cole] Yes, intelligence.
Thanksgiving is also a time
for us to give to one another.
-[Cole] All right. -And tonight, my gift to you…
is to put on another fantastic performance for all of you to enjoy.
And I hope that you give back to me a gift…
-[Lawler] Look at that. -…that I truly deserve
and would be very proud to have.
Your utmost respect and support.
Happy Thanksgiving from your Olympic champion.
[Lawler] How much more can you ask than that, Michael Cole?
[upbeat music playing]
[Cole] So it's Kurt Angle against this man, D'Lo Brown.
[announcer] And his opponent, from Chicago, Illinois,
weighing in at 268 pounds, D'Lo Brown!
[Cole] King, you know, the WWE and its advertisers
have been targeted by a right wing coalition
called The Parents Television Council headed by L. Brent Bozell III.
-[Lawler] I know. -[Cole] Now Bozell has had PTC members
write to WWE's advertisers and sponsors about our programs
with a stated goal of having us thrown off the air
so that you can't watch your favorite WWE shows.
Now the sanctimonious L. Brent Bozell III has appointed himself your censor,
and he and other PTC members target programs
which they do not feel are appropriate for you to watch.
Shouldn't you decide for yourself and for your family
what you consider proper viewing?
This is a country where there is still freedom of expression
and freedom of choice.
Now the WWE asks that you exercise your freedom of expression
and write to our advertisers and sponsors
and thank them for their support of the WWE programs
and let them know how much you as a consumer and a fan
-enjoy World Wrestling Entertainment. -[Lawler] Good idea.
And, King, we'd like the fans to get a piece of paper and a pencil now,
and if you would like to express how you feel,
please write to US Navy Commander Howington
at 5722 Integrity Drive, Building 784, in Millington, Tennessee.
And the zip code is 38054.
So it's Kurt Angle now going to work on D'Lo Brown.
What a night it's been already here on SmackDown.
Can you believe that DX has had Vince McMahon
served with a temporary order of protection?
[Lawler] Uh, what is that? I guess that's like a restraining order.
Vince can't come within 50 feet of DX…
-[Cole] Fifty feet-- -…or he goes back to jail again?
[Cole] Oh, my, and how is that going to affect SmackDown
as D'Lo goes to work on Kurt Angle?
Vince has already set up two matches for tonight,
The Outlaws against The Hardys
in a Steel Cage Match with the Tag Team Titles on the line.
What a war that's gonna be.
D'Lo off the ropes, elbow to the face.
There is a kick to the chin of Kurt Angle by D'Lo Brown.
Also tonight, Test and Shane will take on Triple H and X-Pac.
[Lawler] I can't believe this. D'Lo is treating
this gold medal winner Kurt Angle like a turkey.
[Cole] There is the leg drop. It is Thanksgiving, King.
Cover now, two, kickout. Right shoulder up by Kurt Angle.
[Lawler] I'm so full. We gotta eat turkey again tonight?
[Cole] Yeah, we're gonna eat turkey again. Did you see backstage?
Twenty-something turkeys, all that cranberry sauce, stuffing.
What an event it's gonna be here tonight.
[Lawler] It's a big tradition, I've been here a while,
-I know all about the tradition. -[Cole] Look at this. Oh, my.
Kurt Angle up over the top, D'Lo knocked into the ropes.
Knocks him off, good maneuver by D'Lo Brown.
Kurt keeps his balance,
-D'Lo missed with a clothesline. -[Lawler] Here ya go!
And look at Kurt Angle. Nice Suplex, intense.
Hooks the leg again, here's the cover, there's two.
-[Lawler] He got him! -[Cole] And it's over. Kurt Angle
defeats D'Lo Brown, and there is that enthusiasm by Angle.
[Lawler] Enthusiasm? That's intensity,
integrity and intelligence, Michael, the "three 'I' credo."
[Cole] And there you see Mae Young and Moolah.
Wait a minute, King, she just dropped her turkey hat--
[Lawler] Would you sit down? You're embarrassing us.
-Please, smack her. -[Cole] Uh-uh.
[Cole] Mae Young's having a good old time, King, look at her.
Kurt Angle picks up the win and as we said, we are getting ready
for the World Wrestling Entertainment tradition,
the Thanksgiving feast.
Look at all those turkeys, the stuffing.
[Lawler] Oh, roast pumpkin pie! Yoohoo!
[Cole] Hey, King, stop licking your lips
because the tables are on their way out here now
and all that food is gonna be coming down to ringside
as we get ready for this annual World Wrestling Entertainment tradition,
the big old Thanksgiving feast for World Wrestling Entertainment.
Cheer up, what's with the grouchy face there, buddy?
Grouchy face? You're gonna turn your back on your best partner ever?
No, that's not true.
Me and The Rock have a match later tonight.
Oh, really? You and The Rock have a match later tonight?
-Yeah, yeah. -I hate The Rock.
-You don't hate The Rock, listen to me. -I do hate The Rock.
We're still friends. It's just that when I'm out there with The Rock
we get a much better response from the people.
-Oh, really? -Yeah.
-I cannot stand The Rock. -Don't say that.
And I cannot stand the fact that you brown-nose him too.
Hey, Al, that's all gonna change
when the three of us start hanging out together.
Really? You think he might hang out with me?
I doubt it but I'll work on him.
-[laughs] -I really hate The Rock.
-No, you don't. -Yeah, I do.
You know what, this is horrible.
I mean, I can't believe it's Thanksgiving, we got to wrestle,
and you guys got to fight The Hardy Boyz in a cage.
It's just ridiculous.
We got to fight Shane and Test.
The only good thing is, McMahon can't be within 50 feet of us.
-Right. -Give thanks for that, right?
You know what, though, we're just looking at this all wrong.
-I mean, hell, it's Thanksgiving, right? -Yeah.
We should just lighten up, man. We're stressing out too much.
We got to just lighten up.
I'll tell you what, we need--
You know what? We need to be more thankful.
This is Thanksgiving, we need to--
Come on, I got an idea, you guys, I got an idea.
-All right, let's do it. Come on. -All right.
[Cole] DX is gonna be more thankful, did I hear that right?
[Lawler] Yeah, well, they have a lot to be thankful for.
Vince McMahon can't come within 50 feet of them.
[Cole] Well, King, you know, it is Thanksgiving
and it wouldn't be Thanksgiving in World Wrestling Entertainment
-without the annual Turkey Bowl Match. -[Lawler] Oh, I can't wait for that.
[Cole] And what a match tonight.
[Lawler] The Turkey Bowl Match. Are you ready for this?
Ivory is gonna take on Jacqueline
in a big-- well, in a big bowl of gravy, mushroom gravy.
[Cole] And there's a special guest referee.
-[Lawler] Oh, I can't wait. -[Cole] Miss Kitty.
[Lawler] Yoohoo! Kitty, kitty, kitty.
Hello, ladies.
[crowd cheering]
You know something, ladies,
Thanksgiving just happens to be
every guy's favorite holiday. [chuckles]
Why? Well, it's very simple.
You see, on Thanksgiving,
we get to go out and look for that one beautiful bird.
We get to bring that bird back to the home,
spread its legs and stuff it. [chuckles]
-[Cole] Uh-oh. -[women cheering]
We get to crank up the heat
and watch that bird get all hot and juicy.
-[crowd cheers] -[Lawler] Oh, yeah.
And when it's time to serve up the goods,
all your wives and all our girlfriends
get to suck the meat clean off our drumsticks.
[crowd cheering]
[British Bulldog's theme music playing]
[announcer] And his opponent, from Manchester, England,
weighing in at 250 pounds,
he is the World Wrestling Entertainment European Champion,
The British Bulldog!
[Lawler] You got to love Thanksgiving, Michael.
[Cole] You know, The Bulldog and Val were teammates Monday on Raw
against Too Cool,
but, King, that relationship deteriorated pretty quickly.
[Lawler] You're not kidding. Look at that, British Bulldog
with 2 Hotty Scotty up in the air, knocked Val Venis right off the ring
and Val, well, he left Bulldog to the dogs.
[Cole] Well, King, Val Venis now wasting little time
-getting started on The British Bulldog. -[bell rings]
[Cole] European Title is on the line
as Val Venis hammers away on The British Bulldog.
[Lawler] Michael, you got to understand, Bulldog is from England,
-they don't celebrate Thanksgiving. -[Cole] I understand that.
As Val now kicks to the midsection of The Bulldog.
European Title is on the line, Val misses the left hand,
catching him with an elbow to the chest, misses with the elbow.
[Lawler] You know, turning his back on The Bulldog
has really turned out to be advantageous for Val Venis.
[Cole] Yeah, gave him a European Title shot in this one.
[Lawler] Uh-huh.
You know, if Val wins the title maybe they will start
celebrating Thanksgiving in England.
[Cole] I was gonna ask how Val Venis spends his Thanksgiving
but I think he told us.
[Lawler] Wonder what he ate for Thanksgiving.
-[Cole] I don't even want to know. -[both chuckle]
[Cole] Right hand by Venis, ripped across the ring
by the European Champion, The Bulldog, with authority that time.
Here tonight on SmackDown, Hardcore Title's gonna be on the line.
Listen to this, King. Big Boss Man defending
against "The Big Red Machine" Kane
in a, of course, a no-holds-barred, falls-count-anywhere
Hardcore Championship Match.
[Lawler] Oh!
[Cole] Strength by The British Bulldog, the Suplex,
rolls into the cover on Val, two,
Val gets the shoulder up, Bulldog failed to hook the leg.
What about that war, a steel cage surrounding the ring.
The Hardy Boyz, the high fliers, the acrobats,
taking on The New Age Outlaws, Tag Title is on the line.
[Lawler] The Hardy Boyz felt like they got screwed out of that match last week,
they got a chance to redeem themselves tonight.
Thanks to Mr. McMahon. Oh!
[Cole] Val Venis, nice counter that time and The Bulldog,
European Championship is on the line.
Speaking of Vince McMahon,
he has been issued a temporary order of protection,
he can't go within 50 feet of DX.
[Cole and Lawler] Oh!
-[Lawler] Right in the money maker. -[Cole] Wait a minute,
referee Timmy White is gonna call for the bell,
a blatant low blow by The British Bulldog there.
-[Lawler] Oh, no. -[Cole] And Val Venis felt that one.
[Lawler] He's gone limp.
You hear me? That's bullshit.
[Lawler] He's hurt.
[Cole] And The British Bulldog isn't through yet.
Val Venis was on the top rope.
And The Bulldog now, oh, my, with that Running Slam.
[Lawler] Gonna be no Thanksgiving in Val's house tonight.
[Cole] Well, Bulldog is gonna retain the European Title here.
[announcer] The winner of this match as a result of a disqualification,
Val Venis!
[crowd cheering]
[Cole] Man, oh, man.
Well, The Bulldog retains the title
with that low blow to Val Venis,
blatant in front of referee Timmy White.
[Lawler] You know, I understand that Val Venis, The Big Valbowski,
is insured for over a million dollars.
-[Cole] Look at this. -What are you doing now?
I'm trying to teach you guys a little lesson about being thankful.
-You know… -DX, if we don't sit back
and look at the good things in life… Why so angry?
-Fighting about everything, you know? -That's true.
When we got these great jobs all over the world.
We get to spend Thanksgiving in beautiful Rochester, New York.
I mean, look at this. This is beautiful.
This is to be thankful for. Look at it.
[crowd cheering]
[laughing] This place sucks.
-This place sucks. -This is horrible.
-Hey. What's that stench? -That stinks!
-Got to be this water. -That's a dead body.
Nope, I see what it is.
-It's those bums over there. -They're homeless people.
-"Homeless." -Homeless.
Bums, homeless people, whatever.
As we're walking towards them, the smell is getting stronger.
-I just want to look at 'em. -Hunter.
-Let's just go back in. -What are you gonna do with them?
Have you ever seen homeless people up close?
-No. -Me neither.
-And I don't want to. -Get his bottle of wine.
-Found a… -Don't touch it. It might bite you…
-Hey, I got an idea. -Whoa!
-[overlapping chatter] -What is that?
I got an idea. It's Thanksgiving.
Let's bring these guys in and get them something to eat.
-Turkey. -Yeah, turkey.
-You hungry, pops? -[old man] Yeah.
You want some food? Huh?
-Let's feed them. -You dropped your can, honey.
-Sure you need that can? -There's another--
Hey, look, there's a new one over here in this box.
Brand-new one.
Oh, hey, oh.
-Hey, oh. -Gregg Allman with his zipper down.
[all laughing]
Hey, you're gonna need to put that thing away right there.
Zip that up if you want to come get some food.
You could get arrested for that.
-You need some food? You hungry? -Oh, yeah, I am.
-Come on in. You can eat with us. -D-Generation X.
[overlapping chatter]
[Kane's theme music playing]
[crowd cheering]
[fireworks explode]
[Cole] I can guarantee you this is gonna be a Thanksgiving war.
The Big Red Machine Kane takes on The Boss Man
with the Hardcore Title on the line.
-[bell rings] -[announcer] The following contest
is scheduled for one fall
and it is for the World Wrestling Entertainment Hardcore Championship.
Making his way to the ring, the challenger,
he weighs in at 326 pounds, Kane!
[Cole] And I'm sure it's been a wonderful Thanksgiving for Kane, King.
-[Lawler] Yeah, right. -[Cole] He's in love
with his girlfriend Tori and I'm sure they spent this special holiday together,
or at least they will later on this evening.
[Lawler] Well, so much for all those warm, fuzzy, feelings.
Kane is getting ready for a fierce fight.
[Cole] And what a Thanksgiving it would be for Kane
if he can win the Hardcore Title here on SmackDown.
And tonight's SmackDown is brought to you by WrestleMania 2000 for Nintendo 64,
the most electrifying game in the history of sports entertainment.
[Lawler] And by WWE The Music, Volume 4.
Get the latest and greatest official WWE Superstar entrance themes
now available at all Virgin Megastore locations.
[Cole] And by Western Union Money Transfer,
the fastest way to send money worldwide.
[Lawler] I know one thing about Kane.
He likes his turkey rare.
[Cole] Can you imagine how he cooked his Thanksgiving feast?
-[Lawler] He don't like anything cooked. -[announcer] …from Cobb County, Georgia,
weighing in at 305 pounds,
he is the World Wrestling Entertainment Hardcore Champion,
The Big Boss Man!
[Cole] SmackDown is hot tonight,
but WWE is gonna be hot in California this weekend.
Friday night in San Jose. Saturday, San Francisco, Sacramento.
Sunday in Bakersfield. Tickets are on sale.
With the Hardcore Title on the line
and, King, it's gonna be interesting to see
if Kane is gonna have full concentration in this match.
We've seen some mental lapses in recent weeks
ever since he's, uh, fallen in love for the first time in his life.
[Lawler] Yeah, that's all those, uh, human emotions I think, that, uh,
is making Kane worse for the wear.
-Oh, look at this. -[Cole] And here we go now.
Kane with the big right hands to The Big Boss Man.
What a night it's been already on SmackDown,
temporary order of protection issued to Vince McMahon.
He can't go within 50 feet of D-Generation X.
Right hand by Kane.
Also to come tonight, a match to determine
the Number One Contenders for the Tag Team Titles,
The Rock "n" Sock Connection
-taking on The Hollys. -[Lawler] Uh-oh. Don't come over here.
We got our Thanksgiving feast about to be laid out.
[Cole] No holds barred, falls count anywhere
in this Hardcore Title Match.
[Lawler] And, Michael, you got to admit that Kane,
I mean, he way overreacted when Viscera just tried to-- Oh!
-[Cole] What are you talking about? -[Lawler] Even tried to talk to Tori.
[Cole] Overreacted?
Viscera was hitting on her, trying to pick up his girlfriend.
How would you react?
How would you react if somebody came up
and tried to hit on Mae Young?
-[Lawler] What are you talking about? -You know what I'm talking about.
As Kane now delivers a right hand to The Boss Man.
The Big Red Machine with another one.
Hardcore Championship on the line.
[Lawler] You've been drinking that cranberry wine again,
haven't you, Michael?
[Cole] And Kane and The Boss Man fighting through the crowds.
No holds barred, falls count anywhere. What's The Big Red Machine doing here?
[Lawler] I don't know, but that's no way to treat
-a Number One Contender. -[Cole] He's ripping those stairs apart.
The Boss Man, the Number One Contender for the WWE Championship.
[Lawler] What's the big idea with DX?
Are they actually gonna bring those homeless bums back here to eat?
[Cole] I guess DX will, at least one day of the year,
show a little bit of charity.
-[Lawler] If Triple H was smart-- -[Cole] Look at this.
-[Lawler] What's he gonna do? -[Cole] Oh, man! Boss Man.
[Lawler] You know, if Triple H was smart, all he would do is find a dumpster,
paint it red and yellow, and tell those homeless bums
-they're eating at McDonald's. [laughs] -[Cole] Come on, King.
No count-outs in this one, no holds barred,
no DQ's, Hardcore Title on the line.
Boss Man is in the penalty box,
-and The Big Red Machine going after him. -[Lawler] That's not good. Oh!
[Cole] And there is another right hand by Kane.
Hardcore Title is on the line,
Tag Titles will be on the line later on tonight.
New Age Outlaws defend against The Hardys inside a steel cage.
Also, Shane McMahon and Test against Triple H and X-Pac.
What a night it's gonna be,
what a Thanksgiving night here on SmackDown.
[Lawler] Let me ask you this,
suppose Boss Man loses his Hardcore Title here to Kane,
is he still the Number One Contender for the WWE Championship?
-[Cole] Yes, of course. -[Lawler] Look out!
-[Cole] Oh, man. -[Lawler] Oh my gosh.
[Cole] That door just crashing into the hand of The Boss Man
-and Kane is in control. -[Lawler] As long as Boss Man
is still Number One Contender, that's all that matters.
[Cole] King, I know you're looking forward to the Thanksgiving Day tradition,
the Gravy Bowl Match still to come on SmackDown.
[Lawler] Certainly, it's an annual tradition here in the WWE,
just like the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade.
[Cole] Again, it's gonna be Ivory and Jacqueline
inside a big old bowl of gravy with Miss Kitty as the referee.
Oh, and again, on that hand of Boss Man,
that door slamming those fingers. And imagine the pain The Boss Man is in.
[Lawler] Did you watch the Macy's Parade earlier this morning?
[Cole] Of course. And there's Tori, Kane's girlfriend,
-looking over her shoulder. Looking on. -[Lawler] She's watching this match.
-Oh, come on now. That's Viscera! -Leave me alone.
-Yeah, I'll leave you alone. -[Lawler] Uh-oh. Hey!
[Cole] Viscera won't take no for an answer.
-What's he doing? -[Lawler] He wants her.
-[Cole] Viscera in pursuit of Tori… -[Tori] What do you want?
…and Kane has no idea this is going on,
he is involved in that Hardcore Match with The Boss Man.
[Lawler] He wants her and he gots to have her.
[Cole] Into that concrete wall goes The Big Boss Man.
-[Kane grunts] -[Cole] And again the shoulder.
-[grunts] -[groans]
[Lawler] This is not exactly your normal television Thanksgiving fair, is it?
-[Cole] Wait a minute. -[Lawler] What?
[Cole] Tori just coming out to…
-Oh, Kane! -…get Kane's help.
-He's at the-- -[grunts]
[Cole] And from behind it's Prince Albert.
-Boss Man's running buddy, Prince Albert. -[Lawler] Uh-oh, look at this.
-No DQ, here's the cover. -One, two, three!
[Cole] It's over. Boss Man retains the Hardcore Title.
[Lawler] Prince Albert bashes Kane in the head with a night stick.
[announcer] …and still World Wrestling Entertainment Hardcore Champion,
-The Big Boss Man! -[Lawler] This is all Tori's fault.
[Cole] And Kane's up. And Kane…
I'll tell you, King, you have to wonder once again,
Kane was in control of this matchup and he again rushed to Tori's aid.
[Lawler] Right, that's what you do when you fall in love,
you make some stupid decisions, like get married or something.
Oh, jackpot!
-[laughing] -[overlapping chatter]
A whole bunch of them.
-This is a rare thing. -This is a jackpot.
Ding-dong. Anybody home?
-I'll pay two bucks to have a cage match. -[laughing]
-Wow. -Hey. Is your father home?
-Bam Bam Bigelow right there. -Right there.
-Are we bringing them to our party? -Are you guys interested in a little meal?
-Thanksgiving dinner. -We got turkey.
-Will you work for food? -I'll work for food.
You can't work. You're as bad as Jericho.
You're not a good worker. I'll just give you food.
Can you guys work? I mean, walk? Or do we got to get it for you?
What's the deal?
-Get up. BYOB! -All kinds of food inside.
-Girls. Guys. -Your underwear…
[overlapping chatter]
[Lawler] Michael…
-It's gonna be fine. -Chop chop.
D-Generation X Thanksgiving dinner.
Chop chop, I said.
You want some turkey, don't you? For the love of Pete.
[Lawler] They're bringing more bums in here.
Just cause you're hammered
doesn't mean you can't move quick, let's go.
Well, King, I'll tell you what, it may not be the Salvation Army,
but it's the DX Army.
They're inviting the homeless in for this traditional dinner
for the World Wrestling Entertainment crew.
Moolah and Mae Young in here are bad enough.
Hey, don't you two have some place to go, like a cemetery?
I can't wait. Dig in.
-Hey, wait a minute, look what's coming. -Yoo-hoo!
The turkey's on the way.
The Thanksgiving groceries, I can't wait.
[Cole] And it's gonna be great, the traditional Thanksgiving Day feast
for World Wrestling Entertainment workers, employees and staff.
[Lawler] Okay, I'll start my diet tomorrow.
[Cole] Yeah, tomorrow.
And there's The Rock along with Mankind.
The Rock "n" Sock Connection is back.
Next, Rock and Mankind meet The Hollys
to determine the Number One Contenders to the Tag Titles.
[Cole] What a wild Thanksgiving night it's been
in Rochester, New York for SmackDown.
But the world is looking forward to Raw is War
live Monday night from Los Angeles
and the wedding of the century, Test and Stephanie McMahon.
[light music playing]
[Test] Steph, I want this to be right, let me make it right.
Will you give me the honor of being my wife?
-Yes, I will. -[Lawler] Oh my God!
-[Ross] Yeah! Yeah! -[crowd cheering]
[Ross] Atta girl!
[Lawler] What do you mean "atta girl"? Oh my God.
[Ross] They love each other.
[Cole] But the power of their love was quickly tested by life's uncertainty.
-Hey! Hey! -Calm down.
[Bulldog] No, I'm not gonna calm down.
Stephanie!
-[Cole] Oh my God. What happened? -Stephanie!
Get me a medic! Get me a medic!
[Stephanie] I have, uh, post-concussion syndrome.
I, I don't seem to remember anything that happens to me short term.
I have to write every single thing I do down.
I don't even remember what I did last night.
And I understand that tonight
was supposed to be my wedding night.
And, of course I want to get married some day
and Andrew is so sweet and so nice
and I just can't remember any of the feelings that I had for him.
I can't even remember him at all.
[Cole] Eventually, fate interceded on love's behalf.
Test and Stephanie's union would not die.
I'm starting to get a lot of my memory back
and in fact, I'm starting to remember a lot of really, really wonderful things.
Andrew, you have been nothing but supportive and patient
and I can honestly say that I have never loved anybody
more than I love you right now.
[Ross] Oh my gosh.
So I'm gonna break from tradition.
-[Lawler] JR, what are we hearing? -Andrew…
-will you marry me? -[crowd cheering]
-[Lawler] What? -[Ross] All right.
[Lawler] She-- she proposed.
Steph, of course. I love you.
[crowd cheering]
[Lawler] Oh my gosh.
[Cole] In the end, love conquers all
and Stephanie is now able to get back to the business
of being a beautiful bride.
Stephanie, I'm so excited, I can't hold this in any longer.
You've been through such an ordeal through this whole situation,
I've chartered a plane,
you're gonna be off to Las Vegas for a bachelorette party.
[cheering]
Oh, thank you so much, Mama.
Oh, thank you so much, Mommy.
You deserve it. You deserve it.
[Cole] Join us this Monday night live on Raw
as we celebrate the union of Stephanie Marie McMahon
and Andrew J. Martin. This Monday night, Raw is love.
[Mankind's theme music plays]
[crowd cheering]
[Lawler] Oh, boy.
Well, Michael, they say marriage is a great institution.
I'm just not ready for an institution.
I just can't believe that Stephanie and Test
are gonna actually tie the knot next Monday on Raw.
[bell rings]
[announcer] The following contest is scheduled for one fall
and it will determine the Number One Contenders
for the World Wrestling Entertainment Tag Team Championship.
Introducing first, he weighs in at 287 pounds,
Mankind!
[Lawler] Speaking of somebody that is ready for an institution, Michael.
[Cole] That's Mankind. He's been--
He's had an extra little jump in his step over the past couple of days,
happy to be back together in The Rock "n" Sock Connection.
[Lawler] Do you smell this turkey? Gosh, it smells great.
From Mankind to all of you,
a very happy Thanksgiving.
[crowd cheering]
Now, if we think carefully
and dissect the word "Thanksgiving"…
What the hell is that? [chuckles]
[Mankind] It actually consists of two smaller words,
the first of which is "thanks."
Right now I would like to give out a special thanks
to "The People's Champion" The Rock.
[crowd cheering]
Because when I put my hand out
and The Rock gave me the tag,
I could feel the electricity,
the reaction from the crowd…
[crowd chanting] Rocky! Rocky! Rocky!
[Cole] That was Monday on Raw again.
And it was one of the greatest moments in sports entertainment.
Now also the second word in Thanksgiving
would be "giving."
[Lawler] Duh.
So what I'd like to do now
in front of Rochester, New York, and the entire world…
is I would like to give my sincere apology
-for ever yelling at The Rock… -[Lawler] Ugh.
…because not only did The Rock not throw my book out,
he actually read the book and enjoyed it a great deal.
-[Lawler] I heard him say he read it. -[Mankind] So here is my apology.
And now, although I know around the world
you've all gorged yourself on turkey
and mashed potatoes and cranberry sauce,
I hope you have a little extra room,
because I'm about to serve up
a giant helping of The Rock "n" Sock Connection.
-♪ If you smell what The Rock is cookin' ♪ -[crowd cheers]
[The Rock's theme music playing]
[Cole] What a reaction for The People's Champ,
The Rock.
[Lawler] I'll tell you what, Michael, I don't believe I've ever quite seen
a reaction like The Rock gets.
It's unbelievable.
[Cole] The Rock "n" Sock Connection are back together again…
-[Lawler] What does-- -…on SmackDown!
[Lawler] What does The Rock need with that "sock connection"?
What does The Rock need with Mankind?
He needs Mankind about as much as you and I
need Moolah and Mae Young sitting here behind us.
She's spilling that-- What is in that flask?
[Cole] Whatever is in there, it smells, like you said before,
Wild Turkey perhaps.
[Lawler] I think she's drinking moonshine.
[Cole] You talk about The Rock "n" Sock Connection, you know, they once held
the World Wrestling Entertainment Tag Team Titles.
-And if they win this match… -[Lawler] Don't remind me.
…they'll be the Number One Contenders again.
[Lawler] Oh, please.
Uh-oh. The Rock is smelling.
Probably smelling some of this Thanksgiving turkey
we got sitting out over here.
[crowd cheering]
[Lawler] Look at Mankind, that idiot, he's giddy.
[crowd chanting] Rocky! Rocky! Rocky!
[Cole] Listen to this crowd.
[crowd chanting] Rocky! Rocky! Rocky!
Finally, The Rock…
-has come back to Rochester! -[crowd joins in]
[crowd cheering]
Now, seeing as this is SmackDown "The Rock Show,"
The Rock is in the Thanksgiving spirit.
He notices to his left,
there is a table full of pies.
[crowd cheering]
[Lawler] Oh, yeah.
We got a lot of good pies down here, Rock.
I think The Rock is gonna check out some of the pies.
[Cole] They look good.
[crowd chanting] Rocky! Rocky! Rocky!
[Lawler] Well, they're chanting The Rock's name.
Rocky! Rocky! Rocky!
Now The Rock says, there are many type of pies.
There is apple pie.
[Lawler] Oh, yeah, apple pie.
-Mom's apple pie. -That's not bad.
There is…
-pumpkin pie. -[Lawler] Oh, yeah.
[Cole] That's my favorite.
-[Lawler] Pumpkin pie is your favorite? -[Cole] Yeah.
-Pretty good pie to The Rock. -Yeah.
There is also…
pecan pie.
[Lawler] That's one of my favorites, pecan pie.
-The Rock doesn't like that too much. -[Lawler] Uh-oh.
And of course, there is The Rock's all-time favorite,
including Rochester's all-time favorite,
-poontang pie. -What?
-[crowd cheering] -[Lawler] Poontang pie!
-[Cole] Check it out, King, look at this. -[Lawler laughs]
[Cole] Oh, my.
[Lawler] That's my favorite, poontang pie.
Yes.
[crowd chanting] Rocky! Rocky! Rocky!
-[chanting stops] -[Lawler] Uh-oh.
-The Rock is partaking of poontang pie. -[Cole] Man!
That's some of the best damn poontang pie
-The Rock has ever tasted. -[Lawler laughs]
-[crowd cheering] -[Cole] All right.
-[Lawler] And The Rock knows poontang pie. -[Cole] I'm sure he does.
Now seeing as The Rock is in a giving mood,
-Michael Cole… -[Lawler] Uh-oh.
…The Rock knows that you have never ever
had a piece of poontang pie.
-[laughs] -How does he know that?
-You never had any Poontang pie.
-Come on, King. -That's true, it's true.
You're gonna laugh right along with him.
So The Rock says, for the first time in your life…
try, don't be afraid of the poontang.
I'm not--
You scared of poontang?
-Here's some advice from The Great One. -A pie?
When you're ready for poontang,
-poontang will be ready for you. -There you go.
That's something my dad would say.
Try it. You might like it.
-Do you like it? -[crowd cheering]
He likes it.
Mikey likes it. [laughs]
So, Michael Cole, The Rock says
tell The Rock, along with the millions…
[crowd] And millions!
…of Rock's fans
how your first experience was with poontang pie.
I got to tell you, Rock--
It doesn't matter how your first experience was!
-[Lawler laughing] -[crowd cheering]
What the hell are you laughing at?
Hey, get some poontang pie for Mae and Moolah.
If you smell what The Rock…
[crowd] Is cooking!
-…is cooking. -[crowd cheers]
[Lawler] What about it, Michael?
-[upbeat music plays] -[Cole] What else is gonna happen
on this Thanksgiving Day edition of SmackDown?
[Lawler] I bet you're gonna get some poontang
-from Moolah and Mae Young! -[announcer] And their opponents
at a combined weight of allegedly, well over 800 pounds,
Crash and Hardcore Holly!
So The Hollys meet The Rock "n" Sock Connection.
The winners of this match will be the Number One Contenders
for the World Wrestling Entertainment Tag Team Titles.
And it was the Holly cousins who took the Tag Team Titles
from The Rock "n" Sock Connection the first time around.
Mankind was sulking because he believed The Rock
had thrown his book in the garbage
and The Hollys picked up the win and the Tag Titles.
And then this past Monday night on Raw,
The Hollys did it to Mankind again.
This time, it was Mankind's buddy Al Snow being pinned.
The Hollys pick up the win.
Oh, look at this, King, getting ready to go, Hardcore and The Rock.
-[Lawler] Uh-oh, look at this. -[Cole] The Rock starting things off
against Hardcore Holly with the big right hands.
-The Rock backed him into the corner… -[Lawler] Oh!
and there is a slap to the face by The Rock.
Number One Contendership for the Tag Team Titles on the line here.
-[Lawler] Wow! -[Cole] What an elbow and look at this.
His fancy big eyebrow. Big deal.
-[Cole] That's Al Snow. -What's he got that I don't have?
Jeez. Mankind is such a sucker.
I hate The Rock.
What are you doing out there?
[Cole] King, it sounds like to me that Al Snow may be a bit jealous.
[Lawler] Did that moron say what does The Rock have
-that he doesn't have? -[Cole] Yeah, that's what he said.
[Lawler] Oh my gosh.
[Cole] Rock kicked by Hardcore Holly, and here comes his cousin Crash.
[Lawler] Al is not only stupid, he must be blind, that's it.
[Cole] What a DDT, Rock covers Crash, hooks the leg,
and Hardcore breaks up the count.
I guess that Vegas vacation that Mankind sprung for
-didn't do Al Snow much good. Look out! -[Cole] Oh, my!
Al Snow is jealous of The Rock, plain and simple.
And he's jealous of all the accolades and the affection
that Mankind throws The Rock's way.
Look at the kicks to the midsection. Referee distracted,
and The Rock "n" Sock connection working well as a team here, King.
[Lawler] Yeah, that's what I hate to see.
[Cole] Crash tossed out of the ring.
Who will be the winner of this match face for the Tag Team Titles?
-[Lawler] Oh, no, look out! -[Cole] Oh, man.
[Lawler laughs]
[Cole] Will it be The New Age Outlaws or The Hardys?
They meet later on tonight.
Tag Titles on the line in a steel cage match.
Can you imagine The Hardys flying around that ring
-with a cage around it? -[Lawler] Oh, it's gonna be great.
Don't forget that big old Gravy Bowl Match.
-Yoo-hoo. -[Cole] That's coming up, folks.
Jacqueline, Ivory, Miss Kitty, the referee,
battling it out in a bowl of gravy.
[Lawler] I heard Miss Kitty has got a very special referee outfit too.
-Oh, look at this! -[Cole] What a Suplex by Hardcore Holly.
[Lawler] Well, that's because Hardcore
-is a Super Heavyweight. -[Cole] Yeah.
[Lawler] Takes a Super Heavyweight to lift Mankind
after all the turkey he's eaten today.
[Cole] Can you smell that turkey and the stuffing and everything
-floating around out here, that aroma? -[Lawler] What a day this has been.
-Oh! -[Cole] Hardcore misses,
Mankind rolls out of the way.
And what about DX showing a little charity,
bringing a bunch of homeless folks into the arena
to partake in this Thanksgiving Day dinner?
[Lawler] I can't believe that.
[Cole] Here comes Rock now. Crash catches the right hand by the Rock
and The Rock with the momentum.
The Rock hammering away,
Number One Contendership for the Tag Titles on the line.
-[Lawler] Look at The Rock go. -[Cole] Crash into the turnbuckle.
Rock hammering away.
The People's Champ working at all cylinders
and he almost got knocked,
-his head knocked off by Hardcore. -[Lawler] Look at this!
[Cole] Mankind knocking Holly out of the ring,
Crash and Rock going at it now.
Rock lifts him up, puts him down with authority.
[crowd cheering]
-Oh, look out! -[Lawler] Uh-oh.
[Cole] Thanksgiving Day edition!
[Lawler] Looks like The Rock is in a giving mood.
He is fixing to give the most electrifying move
in sports entertainment today,
-the People's Elbow, to Crash. Ah! -[crowd cheering]
[Cole] The Rock knocks the stuffing out of Crash,
-hooks the leg. It's over! -[bell rings]
The Rock "n" Sock Connection
are Number One Contenders for the Tag Titles!
[announcer] …Mankind and The Rock!
[Lawler] I can't believe it.
The Rock "n" Sock Connection are stronger than ever.
[Cole] The Rock "n" Sock Connection a win away from the Tag Team Titles.
They're Number One Contenders.
What a win on SmackDown.
[Lawler] I bet Al Snow's eating his heart out right now. [laughs]
[Cole] The Rock and Mankind showing tremendous teamwork
and what a Thanksgiving Day gift to Mankind.
[Lawler] Oh, look at this, look at this.
-That sure smells good. -Who's hungry?
[overlapping chatter]
-Yeah, I bet you are. -All right.
Now you're just gonna wait a minute, we're all gonna eat,
but first, let me share a little heartwarming story
with The Outlaws here, who are gonna now tell us
about their favorite Thanksgiving food.
No, it's all good. You go ahead and tell them.
That turkey, man, when you're cutting that,
the juice flows out of there, and…
…it just melts in your mouth.
[Mr. Ass] Oh, man, that's unbelievable.
I like some sausage gravy, and it's always tender,
-the sausage in there. -Oh. Woo-hoo.
And a chocolate pecan pie,
heat it up in the microwave and put some butter sauce on it.
-Oh, man. -That made me hungry.
-That make you guys hungry? -Yeah.
[overlapping chatter]
[Cole] Oh, it's making me hungry, King. And, King, guess what's coming up?
Look what they are getting ready for.
[Lawler] Mushrooms being applied to the gravy.
-Whoo! -[Cole] Gravy Bowl Match.
[Lawler] And we are gonna apply Jacqueline and Ivory to that gravy.
[upbeat music fades]
-[Lawler] Uh-oh. -[upbeat music playing]
[Lawler] Thanksgiving celebration,
things are getting cool now, Michael. [laughs]
[announcer] And his opponent being accompanied to the ring by Too Cool,
he weighs in at 401 pounds,
Rikishi Fatu.
[Cole] I was talking to Grandmaster Sexay earlier on today, King,
and he calls Fatu his homie, his homeboy.
[Lawler] I don't know whether to call him Rikishi or rumpasaurus.
-Have you seen his rear end? -[Cole] Yeah, I've seen it.
It's something to behold.
And I bet after all the Thanksgiving turkey he's eaten today,
he's probably put on a pound or two.
[Cole] So Rikishi set for action, Rochester enjoying SmackDown
and, folks, tickets are on sale Saturday, Minneapolis,
Kansas City and Toronto for huge WWE live events.
And don't forget, Tallahassee, Florida,
SmackDown is coming your way December 14.
What an event it's gonna be.
-Rikishi Fatu, an impressive individual… -[bell rings]
…weighs in at 401 pounds
and here comes the part of the night you've been waiting for.
[Lawler] What?
The shedding of the, uh…
[Lawler] Oh, boy, you think he's busted any toilet seats lately?
[Cole] And here we go now, Joey Abs hammering away on Rikishi Fatu.
Another right hand to Fatu by Abs.
And right hands not having too much effectiveness,
goes down to the midsection now with the boot.
Up over the top, tries for the Sunset Flip,
-that might not be a wise idea. -[Lawler] Oh, no!
-Look how Fatu sits down on him. -[Lawler gagging]
-And Rikishi now… -[Lawler] Ugh!
…look out, cover, shoulders down.
-[Lawler] He's not finished yet. -[Cole] And Rikishi up after one.
Joey Abs in trouble here.
[Lawler] Hey, look at-- Moolah and Mae Young seem to like that.
I think they're a little jealous of Joey Abs.
[Cole] A wild Thanksgiving night already on SmackDown,
temporary order of protection issued against Vince McMahon
-by D-Generation X. -[Lawler] Uh-oh.
[Cole] Vince can't go within 50 feet of DX.
Look out! Rikishi with his backside to the abs of Joey Abs.
[laughing]
[Lawler] I think Rikishi might be one of those floats
next Thanksgiving on the Macy's Day Parade.
[Cole] I don't think he's gonna float through the air here…
-[Lawler] Oh, no. -…but if he impacts,
Joey Abs could be out cold.
-[Rikishi screams] -[Cole] Rikishi, second rope.
Got him! Wow.
-Right into the chest cavity by Rikishi. -[Lawler] Oh, look at that.
[Cole] And Joey Abs desperately trying to catch his breath.
Get up!
[Lawler] Please don't tell me he's got gas.
[Cole] This Rikishi extremely impressive.
And we've seen this before, this is a devastating maneuver.
[Lawler] Not as devastating as his flatulence.
[Cole] Oh! Sit-out piledriver by Rikishi.
-[Lawler] Oh, no. Oh, no. -[Cole] Hooks the leg.
-And it's over. -[bell rings]
[Cole] Rikishi impressive over Joey Abs-- and it's The Posse.
Pete Gas catches a foot to the face
and now Grandmaster Sexay and Scotty 2 Hotty into the ring.
[Lawler] Bad move on the part of The Posse,
-these guys are Too Cool. -[bell ringing]
[Cole] And Too Cool hammering away on Rodney.
And look out, Rikishi.
Oh, just sat out on Pete Gas.
[Lawler] Please quit saying "gas"…
when Rikishi is around.
[Cole] Imagine the impact by Rikishi.
-Rikishi victorious. -[announcer] Here is your winner,
Rikishi Fatu!
[Lawler] You think they might do a little dance in here?
Oh, wait. He's leaving.
Grandmaster Sexay trying to talk Rikishi back into the ring
and get down, get funky, get cool. Look at this.
[Cole] Grandmaster Sexay lending him the goggles.
-And Too Cool is getting down. -[Lawler] Too Cool can dance.
I'm gonna tell you that now, watch this. Oh, look.
[upbeat music playing]
[Cole] Look at Rikishi go. Look at him go!
Too Cool and Rikishi have a little routine.
[upbeat music playing]
-[Lawler] I can't believe it. -[Cole] Hey, they're pretty good.
-[crowd cheering] -[Cole] Oh, man.
[Lawler laughs]
You just heard from The Outlaws but what you really want to hear about
is X-Pac's favorite food.
-Do they really? -They do.
-Tell them. -Well, my favorite food's not here.
Everybody likes turkey, I happen to like pot roast.
Pot roast, that's good.
Well, let's skip right to desserts,
'cause after I eat the pot roast, we go right to dessert.
-What do we have right here? -Pie.
For all you nice hungry people, a little pumpkin pie.
Get your hands off.
You could eat that through a knot hole.
[indistinct] picket fence.
[crowd booing]
Come on, just get a whiff. Just get--
-Don't touch that. -[overlapping chatter]
[X-Pac] Hey, get your damn hands off.
[indistinct chatter]
Before you get to the pies though,
you always have to eat the turkey.
Look at that, will you? Whoo.
-You got to like that, huh? -That's beautiful.
-Can you smell that? -Ooh, that's a bird there.
Smell it. Just smell it.
Don't touch it now. There you go.
You can almost lick it.
[wrestlers laugh]
[crowd booing]
Whoa, that's making you guys hungry now.
You guys are real-- Hey, hey.
Bet you guys are really hungry now, aren't you?
-[Cole] I got a funny feeling about this. -Who's hungry?
-We all are. -We are.
[upbeat music playing]
[Cole] King, look what's coming up next, look what they are getting ready.
[Lawler] Uh-oh, those Pilgrim ladies are,
well, they're stirring up the gravy.
[Cole] The Gravy Bowl Match next!
Mmm. Man. I feel like Fred Flintstone.
-Is this the best or what? -This is great.
-This stuff is great. -[laughs]
All right, you guys are really hungry now, right?
-Yeah! -Yeah.
-I can't hear you, what? -[men] Yeah!
[Cole] DX isn't even sharing, King.
-What did you just say? -Where's the silverware?
God, that's it. Everybody out.
I'm sick of you bums. Get out!
-[Lawler] What? -All of you, get out.
Get out. The silverware, huh?
[overlapping chatter]
Get out!
-[overlapping chatter] -[crowd booing]
-Get out of here. Get out of here. -Take your stinky hats with ya.
Get out, go!
[Cole] King, can you believe the audacity of DX?
I mean, first they're teasing the homeless with all that good Thanksgiving food
and then they kick 'em out of the room because they asked for silverware.
Give me a break.
So Ivory set for action in the annual Turkey Bowl Match.
[Lawler] Oh, and look at Moolah and Mae Young.
You know, Moolah is a former Ladies Champion
trying to take that flask away from Mae Young.
Those two aren't homeless but they're certainly homely.
[announcer] And her opponent Jacqueline!
[Cole] So it's Jacqueline and Ivory.
She was involved last week in that Hardcore Triple Threat Match
on SmackDown won by Ivory.
And Jacqueline taking her time as well.
You like Miss Kitty's referee outfit there?
[Lawler] Do I ever.
If she gets some gravy on her, she'll be edible.
[Cole] Well, the rules of this match are pretty simple, King.
-[Lawler] What's that? -[Cole] A one, two, three wins the match.
-Win by pinfall. -[Lawler] Oh!
[Cole] And Ivory bringing Jacqueline into the gravy bowl
-and here we go. -[bell rings]
[Lawler] That gravy is slippery.
[Cole] It's bowl season
but forget about all those other bowls King was telling you about,
it's Turkey Bowl time.
[Lawler] Yeah, I watched so much football already today,
somebody passed me the turkey and I spiked it.
[Cole] Oh, man, this will put those football games to shame.
Jacqueline, Suplex in the turkey gravy.
Look at that brown soup.
[Lawler] Yeah, those giblets can be dangerous too.
Look at Miss Kitty.
[Cole] Jacqueline trying to get her footing, Ivory by the hair.
Oh, look out, splash.
[Lawler] I saw a sign over there that says "shallow gravy, no diving."
[Lawler laughs]
[Cole] And Ivory trying to get up and Jacqueline tackles her.
-[Lawler] She did dive. -[Cole] Oh, man.
Ivory the Women's Champion. This is a non-title match.
A Thanksgiving Day tradition here at the WWE.
Oh, man, face-first into the gravy.
[Lawler] Oh.
[Lawler] Only in the WWE will you see the annual traditional UPN Gravy Bowl.
[Cole] Wait a minute, here is the cover now,
-the referee counting in the gravy. -[Lawler] Ah! Is that it?
-[bell rings] -[Cole] It's over.
[upbeat music playing]
-[Cole] Jacqueline beats Ivory. -[announcer] Here's your winner,
Jacqueline!
[Lawler] Man, she is the-- the…
the champion of this year's Gravy Bowl.
[Cole] Where is she is gonna put that Golden Ladle trophy?
[Lawler] Oh, right on her mantle, of course.
Oh, look at Ivory, she is upset.
-[Cole] Ivory really upset. -[Lawler] She's upset with Miss Kitty.
Oh, wait, she is splashing Miss Kitty with gravy.
-[Cole] Wait a minute. -[screams]
-[Cole] Ivory going after Miss Kitty here. -[crowd cheers]
[Cole] Gravy for everyone.
[Ivory] Want to see how deep it is?
[Lawler] Look, she's holding Miss Kitty's head under the gravy.
[Cole] Oh, come on now.
-[Lawler] Boy, that's a sore loser. -[Cole] I'd say so.
[Ivory] You want some more?
[man in crowd] Ask her if she'd like poontang pie!
-[Cole] Wait a minute. -You want some more?
[Cole] Wait a minute. Miss Kitty is choking.
Miss Kitty can't catch her breath.
She's choking, King. Miss Kitty's choking.
[Lawler] They've got the EMT's out there already.
[Cole] EMT's. Oh, yeah.
[Lawler] The Heimlich maneuver. It was a mushroom.
[Cole] One of those mushrooms stuck in her throat.
[Lawler] Or a giblet. I told you those giblets were dangerous.
-Wait a minute! Look at this! -[Cole] What's Ivory doing here?
-[Lawler] She's getting on to the EMT-- -[crowd cheering]
[Lawler] Ivory, Ivory…
She went after the EMT, and I'm glad she did.
-[Cole] How embarrassing. -[Lawler] Look out!
-[Cole] Oh, come on. -[crowd cheering]
[Lawler] Holy mackerel!
-Look at those giblets. -[Cole] Oh, man.
How embarrassing for that young lady.
Humiliated by Ivory.
[Lawler] Why would you be embarrassed? Look at Ivory.
[Cole] Put yourself in her shoes.
[Lawler] I'd rather put myself in her cups.
[Cole] What?
Well, there you see Shane and Test.
They're getting ready. Tonight, they meet Triple H and X-Pac
on SmackDown.
[Cole] We're back on SmackDown.
And, King, I didn't think The Godfather would be working on a holiday.
Check him out.
[Lawler] You don't think Moolah and Mae Young
are gonna be able to eat any of this turkey, do you?
They have to put tenderizer on apple sauce.
[Cole] The Godfather enjoying Thanksgiving on SmackDown.
[Lawler] Don't know if those are all hoes
-or a couple of turkeys in there. -It's time once again
for everybody to come aboard the…
[crowd] Ho Train!
[Godfather] Hey, I know that I ain't the only one.
Is there any pimps up in this house?
-[crowd cheering] -[Lawler] Here we go.
To all y'all that know
that The Godfather be pimpin' hoes nationwide,
man, I want you to reach down, roll a fatty for this pimp daddy
and say…
[crowd and Lawler] Pimpin' ain't easy!
[Lawler] Check out Godfather's vest there.
It says "Chronic 2000" on the back.
[announcer] And his opponent from Lima, Ohio,
weighing in at 249 pounds,
Al Snow!
[Cole] Well, King, you can't believe it's been a very happy Thanksgiving
-for this man, Al Snow. -[Lawler] Who cares?
[Cole] Al Snow upset.
Earlier on, we saw that Mankind
has gone back to team with The Rock,
The Rock "n" Sock Connection back together again.
Mankind extremely jealous of--
I should say Al Snow extremely jealous of Mankind's relationship with The Rock.
[Lawler] He said he hates The Rock.
[Cole] Now wait a minute, here comes Al Snow, King, look out.
-Al Snow hammering away on The Godfather. -[bell rings]
You know, Al Snow…
he's really lost it here.
Wait, what's Al doing?
-Back to the ring. -[Lawler] Who knows?
-Even Al don't know what he's doing. -Godfather, kick to the midsection,
Al into the turnbuckle. Al Snow has really lost it.
I mean, he's been depressed about his action figure
being pulled off the shelves of Walmart,
depressed that Mankind's left him for The Rock "N" Sock Connection.
-[Lawler] Uh-oh. -[Cole] And Al hammering away
into the shoulder blades. The Godfather backs him into the ropes.
Here is Al off the rope. Big elbow by The Godfather.
Look out now, Godfather cooking.
[Lawler] Oh, yeah.
[Cole] Leg drop. Nice.
You know, King, I still can't believe the audacity of D-Generation X.
Oh, man.
First off, DX-- Oh!
-[Lawler] Get away from us, you moron. -[Cole] What is he doing?
Oh, he's got a chair now.
[Lawler] Hey, wait, that's for the feast later on.
[Cole] Al Snow with a steel chair
misses The Godfather in the corner.
I think the chair bounced up and hit himself in the head.
[Lawler] He banged it off his own head.
He's an idiot, I told you, and now… Chugga-chugga-chugga…
-[Cole] Ho Train time! Got him. -[Lawler] Whoo-hoo!
Ho Train coming.
[Cole] Rolls him over, hooks the leg.
-The Godfather picks up the win. -[bell rings]
[The Godfather's theme music plays]
[announcer] Here is your winner, The Godfather!
[Cole] You know, King, Al Snow is so completely out of it.
He's letting his emotions and everything else cost him in the match
and, hey, that was that man again
exercising his freedom of expression.
Here come The New Age Outlaws.
Tag Titles are on the line next.
Outlaws, Hardys, inside a steel cage
-on SmackDown. -[Lawler] Oh, yeah.
[The New Age Outlaws' theme music playing]
-♪ Oh, you didn't know? ♪ -[crowd cheering]
[Lawler] Here we go, Michael.
♪ Your ass better call somebody! ♪
[Cole] Here come The New Age Outlaws
with the Tag Team Titles on the line tonight, inside a cage.
[crowd cheering]
-It's The Outlaws and The Hardys. -[Road Dogg] Rochester!
You damn right!
You see it's me. It's me.
It's the D-O-double G!
Rolling once again with that B to the A to the double D!
[Cole] You remember last week on SmackDown, King,
The New Age Outlaws and The Hardys met for the Tag Team Titles.
The Hardys had the Titles won until X-Pac interfered,
but there will be none of that tonight inside a steel cage.
[Lawler] Oh, that steel cage is pretty imposing here.
Not where I'd like to be on a Thanksgiving evening,
I can assure you.
-[Cole] Oh, no. -[Lawler] Please!
[Cole] Mae Young doing the DX Chop.
-[Lawler] I'm in a giving mood. -[announcer] The following contest…
-Gonna give them a going away present. -…is a steel cage match…
…and it is for the World Wrestling Entertainment Tag Team Championship.
Introducing the challengers, being accompanied tonight by Terri,
from Cameron, North Carolina,
at a combined weight of 430 pounds,
Matt and Jeff, The Hardy Boyz!
[Cole] So it's The Hardys against The Outlaws
with the Tag Team Titles on the line inside a steel cage.
And, King, I'll tell you what,
a couple of ways to win this type of matchup--
pinfall, submission or an escape out of the cage.
And I'm looking forward to this one,
especially with The Hardys' high-flying acrobatics.
Who knows what they're gonna do on this steel cage here.
[crowd cheering]
And I have to admit, The Hardys with their ability,
and also with the tutelage of Terri…
-[bell rings] -…have really garnered a lot of attention
in recent weeks.
Still to come tonight, Triple H and X-Pac against Shane McMahon and Test.
Oh, Road Dogg with a knee to the midsection.
[Lawler] Whoever heard of eating a turkey drumstick with a fork anyway?
[Cole] Maybe they didn't want a drumstick, maybe they wanted the breast.
-Drop-kick, back of the head, by Jeff. -[Lawler] Speaking of that…
-Terri Runnels, come sit by me. -[Cole] King, please.
[Lawler] I've got a pumpkin pie for you.
[Cole] What a Thanksgiving night it's been on SmackDown.
We kicked off the show with DX
issuing a temporary order of protection against Vince McMahon,
Vince can't come within 50 feet of any member of D-Generation X.
Jeff Hardy up over the top of Road Dogg,
look at Road Dogg, tremendous balance by Jeff Hardy there.
[Lawler] If you ask me, the protection order is a good idea
because Vince snapped, he was completely deranged Monday.
[Cole] Vince went after DX's limousine, was arrested, humiliated.
-Look at this now. -[Lawler] Look at this!
[Cole] Trying to get out of the cage is Matt Hardy…
-Kick to the face. -[Lawler] That was close.
[Cole] Matt was climbing the cage there
as Jeff goes to work on Mr. Ass in the corner,
-double-team now. -Oh, look at this.
[Cole] Up over the top, double clothesline by The Hardys.
[Lawler] Good work.
[Cole] Vince McMahon was arrested on Raw this past Monday night.
He did make bail though, King.
-And look at this! Oh! -[Cole] Oh, man.
Mr. Ass caught him in mid-air.
-Oh! -[Lawler] Wow.
[Cole] Road Dogg now gonna try to leap out of the--
-Oh, no, he won't. -[Lawler] Oh!
[Cole] Oh, my, Road Dogg doing some flying of his own.
Hardy Boyz getting their own medicine.
Double cover here, two, double kickout.
Road Dogg, that was a Hardy Boyz maneuver.
[Lawler] Oh, DX can fly when they want to.
[Cole] And here comes Matt Hardy, whipped across the ring.
Mr. Ass hung him up on the turnbuckle
and The New Age Outlaws cooking on all cylinders here.
We got to take another look, King, at the athletic ability of The Road Dogg.
-Top rope, got them both. -[Lawler] Sure did.
Double-team now on Jeff, off the ropes now,
Jeff caught Road Dogg with a boot, look at this, oh, he walked into it,
Mr. Ass, slingshot right into that steel cage.
That will bust you up in a hurry.
[Lawler] I tell you what, this cage match has turned into
one of those Texas Tornado matches
where all four men are in the ring at the same time
and one of them is about to be out.
-Mr. Ass, if he gets out… Oh, no! -[Cole] Mr. Ass was trying to get out.
Road Dogg hitting the ropes, Mr. Ass came down.
[Lawler] Couldn't put more of a damper on your Thanksgiving than that.
-And Jeff now, Matt Hardy. -[Lawler] Oh!
[Cole] Oh, my. Double-team by the Hardy Boyz.
Among the best at it. Tag Team Championship on the line.
Mr. Ass face-first into the steel cage.
-[Lawler] Not again. -[Cole] And again for good measure.
What a Thanksgiving it would be for the Hardy Boyz and Terri
if they can win the Tag Team Titles tonight.
-Senton bomb! Could do it. -[crowd cheering]
[Lawler] I'd be giving thanks all night long with Terri.
[Cole] Jeff Hardy with a senton bomb.
Matt's trying to climb out of the cage and Road Dogg is gonna pull him back in.
Or is he?
-And Jeff and Road Dogg exchanging blows. -[Lawler] Oh, there he goes.
[Cole] Look at Matt now. Matt is up on the top rope.
-If he gets down, we got a new champion. -[Lawler] No!
-[Cole] Wait a minute! -[crowd gasps]
[Cole] Matt Hardy could have gotten out of the cage,
but what a maneuver, knocking The Road Dogg down,
but he also hit his own partner, Jeff.
[Lawler] Yeah, what an idiot.
[Cole] Matt Hardy from the top of the cage
wiped out not only The Road Dogg but his own brother Jeff.
[Lawler] And the referee, everybody is down.
[Cole] Referee Jimmy Korderas down as well.
Tag Team Titles on the line inside a steel cage,
you win by pinfall, submission, or escape out of the cage.
[Lawler] Boy, and this is what happens when you go to those high risk maneuvers,
-it's-- uh-oh, watch this. -[Cole] Look out now. Oh, my!
Jeff Hardy tossed out of the cage, the Hardy Boyz win!
We have new champions, King! We have new champions!
[Lawler] Billy Gunn certainly didn't mean to do that.
-[crowd cheering] -[Cole] Tornado DDT.
We have new champions. Jeff Hardy is out of the cage.
But the referee is knocked out
and there is X-Pac. No!
This can't be happening.
The referee is out.
Wait a minute, X-Pac's throwing Jeff Hardy back in the cage!
The Hardy Boyz should have won! The Hardy Boyz should be champions.
[Lawler] Right? The referee is just now getting to his feet.
[Cole] And Road Dogg trying to climb out.
Matt Hardy with a low blow from behind.
The Hardy Boyz should have won this match.
Jeff Hardy was tossed out of the cage but he landed on the floor.
-Matt and Road Dogg exchanging blows. -[Lawler] Oh my God!
[Cole] Road Dogg from the top rope
and now Matt Hardy gonna try to climb.
-[Lawler] Look at this. -[Cole] X-Pac again, kick to the face.
[crowd booing]
[Cole] The referee coming to now
but X-Pac, his damage is done in this one.
And here comes Mr. Ass trying to make it out of the cage.
-[Lawler] He's gonna do it. -[Cole] And he does.
-[bell rings] -[Cole] Darn it!
[Lawler] What?
[Cole] The Hardy Boyz should be champs.
[announcer] …and still World Wrestling Entertainment Tag Team Champions,
The New Age Outlaws!
[Lawler] Looks like The Hardy Boyz forgot to count on the X-Factor.
-Two weeks in a row. -[Cole] King, for the second week,
X-Pac has saved the Tag Team Titles for The Outlaws.
[Lawler] Unbelievable.
[Cole] The New Age Outlaws retain the Tag Team Titles.
What a Thanksgiving it's been here on SmackDown.
[TV announcer] And now, the WWE Slam of the Week
presented by THQ's WWE WrestleMania 2000 for Nintendo 64,
the most electrifying game in the history of sports entertainment.
-[Ross] Oh my God! -[tires screeching]
Vince McMahon has rammed the DX limo!
[Lawler] What's he doing? He's gone crazy!
[Ross] Has Vince McMahon lost his mind?
[bell ringing]
♪ Are you ready? ♪
["Are You Ready" playing]
♪ You think you can tell us what to do? ♪
♪ You think you can tell us What to wear? ♪
♪ You think that you're better? ♪
♪ Well, you'd better get ready ♪
♪ Bow to the masters ♪
♪ Break it down ♪
[Cole] We are back on SmackDown
as we prepare for what will be an emotional Tag Team Match.
Triple H and X-Pac to take on Shane McMahon and Test.
[announcer] The following Tag Team contest is scheduled for one fall.
Making their way to the ring with a combined weight of 482 pounds,
X-Pac and Triple H!
[Cole] And, King, think about how personal this rivalry has become
-between Triple H and Vince McMahon. -[Lawler] Oh, yeah.
[Cole] Not only are they gonna meet one-on-one December 12 at Armageddon,
but think about the jailing, the humiliation of the owner
at the hands of Triple H this past week on Raw.
[crowd cheering]
[Cole] King, listen to this.
I'm getting word down from the back
that Vince McMahon has stuck it to DX again.
Vince McMahon has brought the homeless back into the building
and he's feeding them Thanksgiving dinner.
-Try the pie. -[man] Yeah, sure.
[Cole] Well, good for Vince McMahon.
The audacity of DX to kick the homeless out of the building in the first place
because the homeless asked for silverware to eat their Thanksgiving dinner with.
[Lawler] MechWarrior 3 presents WWE Armageddon.
MechWarrior 3 for PC, CD ROM, let the battle begin.
WWE Armageddon will be live December 12
from the National Car Rental Center in Fort Lauderdale, Florida.
[announcer] And their opponents,
co-owner of the World Wrestling Entertainment,
Shane McMahon and Test!
[Cole] And what an emotional roller coaster week
this is gonna be for Test.
He and Shane take on Triple H and X-Pac tonight
and here we go now.
-Shane and X-Pac. Triple H and Test. -[bell rings]
[Lawler] What's got to be going through the mind of Test?
He is taking on Triple H and X-Pac tonight
and he's got to take the walk down the aisle
to marry Stephanie this Monday night.
[Cole] Monday night, live on Raw,
the wedding of the century, Test and Stephanie.
And look at Test, look at the look in his eyes
as he knocks Triple H outside the ring.
[Lawler] I'm gonna tell you something, the McMahon plan is fired up here tonight.
[Cole] Vince McMahon, folks, we saw him earlier on,
temporary restraining order.
I should say a temporary order of protection has been issued.
Vince cannot come within 50 feet of the D-Generation X.
And look at Shane, he wants X-Pac.
X-Pac misses, Shane gets a little bit of Triple H,
-and X-Pac with a kick from behind. -[Lawler] Oh, wow.
Don't you know if Vince McMahon could come within 50 feet,
he'd be right down here, he'd probably be in this ring right now.
[Cole] And there is the double-team by DX.
So much emotion for Shane McMahon as well,
seeing the torment of his sister Stephanie,
his soon-to-be brother-in-law Test, at the hands of DX,
the torment that DX has put his father, Vince McMahon, through.
And Triple H with again, a right hand to Shane.
This match ordered by Vince earlier on.
[Lawler] Well, look at this now, Shane is being choked by X-Pac.
[Coe] Triple H wisely distracting the referee,
sending him over to Test's corner,
as X-Pac works on Shane. Kick to the midsection.
[Lawler] I still can't believe that Vince McMahon
is actually gonna get in the ring and fight Triple H at Armageddon.
[Cole] December 12,
National Car Rental Center in Fort Lauderdale.
[Lawler] Well, just think of everything that DX has put Vince through
involving Stephanie and Test and Shane…
[Cole] Oh! Knee to the face by Triple H. Shane's in trouble.
And here comes X-Pac.
X-Pac into the ring, DX working on a double-team here.
Again, a kick to the midsection of Shane.
[Lawler] I'm gonna tell you, Shane needs to tag Test if he gets an opportunity.
Shane is so emotionally caught up in this whole situation,
he just tends to forget that he's not the experienced wrestler…
-[Cole] Oh! -…that X-Pac and Triple H are.
[Cole] But I can't blame him, King, can you?
[Lawler] Well, yeah, no, but, you know, sometimes cooler heads must prevail.
[Cole] Elbow to the chest by X-Pac
and X-Pac and Triple H in control here of Shane McMahon.
Shane desperately trying to get to his soon-to-be brother-in-law Test.
DX is capable of anything.
We've seen that over the past couple of weeks.
[Lawler] They're capable of not feeding homeless people and you got to like that.
[Cole] And here is Test into the ring, but Triple H again distracted the referee
and here's the double-team now.
Both X-Pac and Triple H hammering away on Shane McMahon.
Shane has had so much taken out of him so far,
and now the choke by Triple H.
[Lawler] You know what, maybe Shane is not tagging Test
because he knows that Test's nose has been recently broken
and don't want it all messed up for the wedding. [chuckles]
[Cole] Broken not once but twice.
[Lawler] That big wedding's coming up Monday night.
You know, they got to do wedding pictures and all that sort of stuff.
[Cole] Live on Raw, Test and Stephanie McMahon to be married,
but the big--
[Lawler] Test's nose is spread all over his face.
What would that look like in the photo album?
[Cole] But the concern right now, King,
the more immediate concern here on SmackDown
is the state of Shane McMahon as DX is dismantling him here in the ring.
[Lawler] Lot of stuff to be concerned with here on Thanksgiving night.
-Oh! -[Cole] Oh, man.
Great Suplex by X-Pac.
And there, a right hand delivered to Test in the corner.
[Lawler] I'm concerned with Mae Young and Moolah drunk behind me here.
She can whack me with her cane at any moment.
[Cole] It was X-Pac who we just saw.
-Look at this. -[Lawler] Oh, man!
-[Cole] X-Pac hits Triple H. -[Lawler] Big mistake there.
As Shane drops out of the way, now Shane trying to make it to the corner
and X-Pac again isolates Shane from his partner Test.
And a low blow.
Shane with a low blow, and can he get to Test now?
Can Shane make the tag?
X-Pac trying to get to Shane before Shane can get to the corner.
Test looking on, the fresh man.
X-Pac going for Triple H.
[Lawler] He's gonna make the tag. He's got him.
[Cole] The tag to Triple H, oh, and here comes Test!
-[crowd cheering] -[Cole] And Test is in now.
A right hand to Triple H, and The Game's in trouble.
X-Pac off the ropes now. Catches a boot to the face.
Triple H going for the ride.
-Sidewalk slam! -[Lawler] Boy, I'll tell you,
Test is making his future brother-in-law proud.
Oh! This is just what Vince had in mind.
-[Cole] Oh! -[Lawler] That's not.
[Cole] Triple H with a Clothesline.
[Lawler] That's right, that's why Triple H is The Game.
[Cole] Misses that time with a right hand.
And Test, big boot to the midsection, setting him up here.
-Pumphandle Slam time, King. -[Lawler] No way.
-He got it! -[Cole] Oh, my!
Hooks the leg, it could be it, there's one, two,
and X-Pac breaks up the count.
[crowd boos]
-[Lawler] And X-Pac has saved DX-- -[Cole] Oh, my!
Shane with a spear! Shane with a spear!
-[crowd cheering] -[Cole] X-Pac out of the ring.
[Lawler] Could have broken X-Pac's ribs.
[Cole] And X-Pac hammering away now on Shane McMahon.
[crowd cheering]
-[Cole] And Test now. -[Lawler] Oh, what's Test gonna do?
[Cole] Wait a minute, wait a minute! The Outlaws! The Outlaws are out here!
Test on the top rope and Mr. Ass makes him pay.
-[Lawler] Oh! -[Cole] DX comes at you from all sides.
X-Pac into the ring now.
-Look out, X-Factor on Test. -[Lawler] Oh!
-There goes that nose! -[Cole] X-Factor on Test!
[Lawler] Test's nose is smashed again, I guarantee you.
[Cole] Triple H hooks the leg.
-Folks, this one's over. -[bell rings]
[Lawler] So is Test's nose, it's all over the place.
[announcer] Here are your winners, X-Pac and Triple H!
[Lawler] What a match.
[Cole] The New Age Outlaws come swarming into the ring.
And wait a minute. DX isn't through yet.
-[Lawler] What? -[Cole] Triple H hammering away on Shane.
[Lawler] I don't think DX is gonna be invited
to the wedding next Monday but I don't think they'll care.
[Cole] Oh, man! Triple H clocking the referee.
And D-Generation X.
-[Lawler] Uh-oh. -[Cole] No.
-[Lawler] Oh, look out, Shane! -[Cole] Oh! Wow.
Triple H with that low blow to Shane and look at D-Generation X.
[Lawler] That was the DX version of birth control right there.
[Cole] Total humiliation of Shane McMahon now.
[Lawler] Trying to make sure there are no future McMahons.
[crowd cheering]
-[Cole] Oh, no. -[Lawler] Here it is!
[Cole] Bronco Buster to Shane. How humiliating.
[Lawler] I mean, the big one too.
[Cole] On Thanksgiving night? No.
This is a four-on-two.
Right now, it's a four-on-one with Shane.
-Test is outside the ring. -[Lawler] Been a great night.
[bell ringing]
[Lawler] They grab each one of his legs, that turkey can make a wish.
[Cole] Hey, wait a minute, there is Vince.
King, he's got to stay 50 feet away from DX.
He cannot get within 50 feet of DX or he's going back to jail.
Vince has got to watch his son get pulverized by DX
and, King, he can't do a damn thing about it.
He's going back to jail if he approaches that ring.
-[Lawler] Look, it-- -[Cole] No.
-[Lawler] Look at DX. -[Cole] No.
-[Lawler] Oh, no! -[Cole] The Pedigree.
Oh, my. Imagine what Vince is going through now
seeing his son being pulverized.
[Lawler] It's like watching your son being executed right there
and not being able to lift a finger to help.
[Cole] Come on, stop this thing!
[Lawler] This is not the Thanksgiving that the McMahon family had in mind.
[Cole] Where's Vince going, King? Where's Vince going?
[Lawler] I don't know, I'm just watching Triple H pummel Shane.
[Cole] Vince was on the stage and he left
as DX continues this all-out assault on Shane.
-[Lawler] Nothing he can do, he can't-- -[Cole] Wait a minute. Look out!
The Hardys! It's The Hardys!
[Lawler] What are they doing out here?
[Lawler] Look at this.
[Cole] They all have scores to settle with DX.
Matt Hardy, Edge and Christian!
Crash Holly, Hardcore!
It's Kane! It's Kane!
[crowd cheering]
[Cole] And there's Prince Albert!
Prince Albert now as Vince looks on.
It's an all-out assault on DX!
[Lawler] Look at Vince McMahon, he's opened the flood gates!
-Val Venis! D'Lo Brown! -[crowd cheering]
-[Lawler] What in the-- -[Cole] DX is getting theirs!
[Lawler] McMahon is doing this, he's sending these guys in on top of DX!
[Cole] McMahon can't get within 50 feet of DX.
Well, all the other Superstars can.
[Lawler] Oh, and Vince even opened the doors to the homeless.
Look at this!
[Cole] The Posse are out there.
What is going on?
[crowd cheering]
[Cole] The fans are standing, it's chaotic on Thanksgiving night, King.
The Pilgrims will be rolling over in their graves.
[Lawler, laughs] This is great.
-[Cole] What a SmackDown! -[Lawler] Everybody is fighting.
[Cole] Bradshaw going after The Road Dogg.
-The Acolytes trying to-- -[Lawler] Hey, wait a minute.
[Cole] Wait a minute! What's Faarooq-- No!
Wait! That's my pie!
[Lawler] Wait, that's my turkey!
[Cole] Faarooq took a bone out of that drumstick
and then hit Crash with it!
-[Lawler] What the hell is going on here? -[Cole] King, run for cover!
-[Lawler] It's a food fight! -[Cole] Oh, man!
A food fight on SmackDown!
A food fight… The table is going!
-Oh my God! -[Lawler] Wait a minute!
-That's my dinner! -[Cole] Food fight!
[Lawler] That's my feast!
What are you-- this is-- oh, look, this is great.
[Cole] On Thanksgiving Day, holy cow!
[Lawler] Oh, no.
[Cole] And Vince McMahon looking on, wait a minute.
[groans]
-[Cole] There is food everywhere. -[Lawler] This is terrific.
-[Cole] This is a bloody mess. -[Lawler] I love it! [laughs]
[Cole] Turkeys, potatoes.
-[Lawler] Yes! -[Cole] Man, oh, man!
-[Lawler] Calm down now. -[Cole] And look at this,
look at McMahon and Triple H face-to-face.
Vince McMahon and Triple H face-to-face!
[Lawler] I love it.
I'm gonna tell you something.
This is without a doubt
the greatest Thanksgiving I have ever seen in my life!
-[laughs] -[crowd cheering]
-[Cole] Oh! Oh! -[crowd cheering]
-[Cole] Oh! -You idiot!
[Cole] King, happy Thanksgiving from SmackDown.
I think.
You idiot!
[crowd cheers, fades] nksgiving from SmackDown.