[Mr. McMahon] Today, here in the United States,
we celebrate the life of an extraordinary man who had a dream.
A dream of unity, a dream of peace, long live the dream.
["Thorn in Your Eye" plays]
♪ It's my life in the box in front of me ♪
♪ Taking junk in my arms Is the soul of me ♪
♪ You walk by Eyes can see me laying face down ♪
♪ Why am I the thorn in your eye? ♪
[crowd cheering]
[Ross] The Royal Rumble is this Sunday on pay-per-view
and we expect to be rumbling all night
here live from the sold-out Bradley Center in Milwaukee.
Our fans in WWE New York are jacked, they're all ready.
Jim Ross and Jerry "The King" Lawler here at ringside.
And, King, what a match-up, what a main event tonight.
We're gonna see The Rock and The Undertaker join forces
to collide with Kane and Rikishi.
[Lawler] Oh, my God. I've seen a lot of brawls,
I've seen a lot of matches on Raw, but this may be the biggest of all.
[Ross] And we fully expect the Texas Rattlesnake,
"Stone Cold" Steve Austin to be here tonight live as well.
["Loaded" plays]
-[Lawler] Oh, boy, here we go. -[Ross] And here we go, folks.
This can be a hellacious ride here tonight.
[bell dinging]
[Lilian] The following Six-Person Tag Team contest
is scheduled for one fall.
Introducing first, the team of Lita, Matt, and Jeff, The Hardy Boyz.
[crowd cheering]
[Ross] Matt and Jeff Hardy along with Lita will be in Six-Person Tag Team Match
in here first.
And, King, against one of your favorite entities,
the Right to Censor.
[Lawler] Oh, please, give me a break. I hate them, I can't stand them.
I'm really voting for The Hardys and Lita.
I just want to see them eliminate this Right to Censor group
once and for all.
-["Censorship" plays] -Yeah!
[crowd booing]
[Lilian] Their opponents, the team of the World Wrestling Entertainment
Women's Champion, Ivory, Val Venis, and Steven Richards, Right to Censor.
[Ross] Well, folks, last night on MTV's Heat,
Lita issued a stern challenge to the injured Chyna.
I think that Chyna is afraid of me and afraid to get in the ring with me.
And I'm so sure of it that I am willing to lay my title
on the line at Royal Rumble to prove it.
[Ross] Well, Lita knowing that Chyna was not in earshot.
[Lawler] Yeah, Ivory talks tough when she knows that…
Well, she not only knows that Chyna wasn't in here,
she knows that Chyna's not 100%.
[Ross] And Chyna, thanks to Right to Censor, may never be…
-[bell dinging] -…at 100% again.
And here we go. Man, what a night.
You can just feel the electricity in the air here
just six days before the Royal Rumble pay-per-view this Sunday.
And it's Jeff Hardy and Val Venis kicking it off here.
A rockiest crowd indeed here in Milwaukee.
And thank you for being with us at home here on TNN
and live on TSN to our neighbors in Canada.
[Lawler] Well, listen to this crowd, they are jacked, and I think…
I think these people hate Right to Censor just as much as you and I do, JR.
[Ross] And Val Venis, a proud Right to Censor member.
What's wrong with him?
Got the right hand in. Nice drop toe-hold takedown by Jeff Hardy.
[Lawler] Right on Val's nose. Here we go.
[Ross] Jeff Hardy quicker than a hiccup, no doubt about that.
Double team, Matt Hardy and his brother Jeff.
[Lawler] Oh, whoa.
[Ross] A little poetry in motion there, King.
And a knockdown.
[Lawler] Yeah, could use some there. [laughs]
[Ross] We're gonna have Rock and The Undertaker tonight
against Kane and Rikishi.
[Lawler] Look at this. Oh, it's the spin cycle.
The old spin cycle from The Hardys.
[Ross] And white socks, Steven Richards…
getting just a small sample of what he deserved.
And I cannot believe the audacity…
A nice spinebuster.
And Val Venis didn't go for the cover, but goes with the right hands.
I could not believe the audacity of Ivory last night on MTV's Heat,
issuing a very brave challenge
to the phenomenal "Ninth Wonder of the World" Chyna,
knowing that Chyna is not and may never be at 100% again, King.
[Lawler] That's why Ivory seemed so brave.
I mean, that's why she's out there running her mouth.
Ivory's one of the only people I know
that could talk her head off and not miss it.
[Ross] Man, I would not wanna go on a long car trip with Ivory,
-I could tell you that. -[Lawler] Oh, please.
[Ross] And now Steven Richards with a sidewalk slam on Matt Hardy.
-Going for the cover here… -Two!
…and got a near fall with white socks.
Tag made, here comes Val Venis.
[Lawler] There's Right to Censor, you hear the term, oh, self-righteous.
I mean, they really think they know it all.
[Ross] Here's the cover! And Matt Hardy with a kick-out.
All they do they would like for all of us to live our lives as they dictate.
[Lawler] No, thanks.
[Ross] Forget freedom of speech, freedom of expression…
Nice expression there by Matt Hardy.
[Lawler] They wanna tell you what to wear or what to not wear.
[Ross] What to watch on television or what not to watch.
[Lawler] See, if it were up to Right to Censor,
we wouldn't be able to see Lita out here.
Well, at least not dressed like that.
Woo-hoo.
[crowd cheering]
I'm not against scantily clad women, at least not as often as I'd like to be.
-[Ross] I'd pick on that a few years ago. -[Lawler chuckles]
[Ross] Matt Hardy trying to fight back, but he's being hammered by Val Venis,
a very talented competitor, there's no doubt about that.
Val Venis has phenomenal physical skills and great in-ring technique.
Politically, I think Val is using his new sock.
[Lawler] Oh, wow. Don't sugarcoat it, JR. Say what you mean.
[Ross] I'm just telling the truth since it worked better that way.
Double team here, and the…
Oh, double suplex.
And now the white socks, Steven Richards…
got a near fall on Matt Hardy.
We expect "Stone Cold" Steve Austin to be here tonight.
The Texas Rattlesnake, who just seven days ago
got screwed by Triple H out of the WWE Championship,
and he has a tremendous confrontation last week on Raw against Kurt Angle.
-Right hand by Jeff Hardy, knocked in… -[Lawler] This should be good.
-[Ross] Oh, my! -[Lawler] Yes!
[Ross] Jeff Hardy may have pulled a hamstring back there
with that leg drop from the second rope, I think it was.
[Lawler] You ever pulled a hamstring, JR?
-[Ross] Yes, I have. -[Lawler] I mean, your own?
-[Ross] Yeah, when I was younger. -[Lawler] Oh, I see.
[Ross] When I actually did some physical exertion, I did.
[crowd cheering]
[Lawler] Oh, baby.
[Ross] There's another tag made.
Here comes Jeff.
And Val Venis back in.
We have yet to see Lita and Ivory officially in this contest.
Beautiful dropkick by Jeff Hardy.
[Lawler] I've seen Lita in this contest.
I've been watching her the whole time as a matter of fact. Oh!
[Ross] A unique takedown by Jeff.
-Double leg takedown. -[Lawler] Oh, baby.
[Ross] Both feet right to the sternum of…
-[Lawler] There you go. -[Ross] …of white socks.
[Lawler] Uh-oh. Look at this. Oh.
[Ross] Steven Richards in front of us.
[Lawler] Good. On the floor, that's a good place for him.
[Ross] And Val Venis, though, reasserting himself here as…
[Lawler] Down to shirts and skins.
[Ross] Oh, wait a minute, Ivory made a tag. Ivory made a tag.
-[Lawler] Look at this. -[Ross] A blind tag.
[Lawler] Oh, yeah. Whoa.
[Ross] And a meeting of the dimwits brought the minds…
Well, Lita got the tag.
[crowd cheering]
[Lawler] Oh, what's she gonna do? Look at this. Oh!
-[Ross] Lita with a hurricanrana on Val. -[Lawler] That's a hurricane-Lita.
[Ross] And a spear takedown by Lita.
And she is hammering away at Ivory, the WWE Women's Champion.
[Lawler] Don't stop, give it to her. Oh, big clothesline.
[Ross] Nice knockdown by Lita.
[Lawler] Where are you going, Ivory? Big shot.
[Ross] I think it got a little hot in the kitchen for Ivory.
-[Lawler] Get in there, tough girl. -[Ross] Oh, wait.
-There's Chyna. -[Lawler] What?
[Ross] King, there's Chyna.
[Lawler] What the heck? What's she doing out here?
[Ross] Chyna's here.
[Lawler] Oh.
[Ross] And she just threw Lita right back into…
Oh, threw Ivory right back into Lita.
-[Lawler] Look at Ivory. -[Ross] Ivory's scared to death of Chyna.
[Lawler] She can't believe what she's seeing.
Yeah, that's right, it is Chyna. Oh!
[crowd cheering]
[Ross] And Lita, with a Twist of Fate on Ivory.
-[crowd] One, two, three. -[bell dinging]
["Loaded" plays]
[Lilian] Here are your winners, Lita and The Hardy Boyz.
[Ross] The Right to Censor getting Lita the hell out of here.
Getting Ivory, I'm sorry, the heck out of here.
[Lawler] Look at Ivory. She still can't believe her eyes.
Yeah, you're right. That's Chyna.
Hold on a minute, Ivory.
[Lawler] Look at that face. Ugh.
[crowd cheering]
Oh, look at that face.
[crowd cheering]
Last night you issued a challenge to me for your precious little Women's Title
knowing that I wouldn't show up.
Knowing that I wasn't 100% physically well.
Well, be careful what you asked for, Ivory, 'cause you just might get it.
[crowd cheering]
[Lawler] What she mean by that?
I accept your challenge
and I will be there Sunday at the Royal Rumble.
And according to my schedule…
you have about five days of physical well-being.
[Lawler] Whoa!
[Ross] This Sunday, Chyna's accepted Ivory's challenge.
The Royal Rumble is this Sunday on pay-per-view.
[Lawler] And that's gonna be for the Women's Title?
[Ross] Yes, it is.
Again tonight, The Rock and The Undertaker collide with Rikishi and Kane.
And that could be an all-out tag team war here tonight.
Plus, tonight we expect "Stone Cold" Steve Austin to join us.
[Lawler] Here he comes. We're about to see him. No, wait a minute.
[Ross] Oh, Austin doesn't travel in a limousine.
That is a long black limousine pulling in here at the Bradley Center.
[Lawler] It's extra-long. It's… Oh, no wonder.
[crowd booing]
It's like the first couple.
[Ross] It's Triple H and his wife,
and this cannot be a good news for anybody.
The number one contender is here.
["The Game" playing]
♪ It's time to play the game… ♪
[crowd cheering]
[Ross] And we are back live at the Bradley Center here in Milwaukee.
And apparently, we're about to be joined
by the number one contender for the WWE Title,
the man that will meet Kurt Angle this Sunday,
all on the pay-per-view extravaganza.
It's gonna be Triple H, Kurt Angle for the WWE Title, King,
this Sunday in the New Orleans Arena.
[Lawler] Oh, it looks like it's time to play the game all right.
Look at Stephanie.
[Ross] Stephanie's following her husband, The Game, to the ring.
What an opportunity for that man, Triple H, to regain the WWE Title.
But can he beat the 1996 Olympic gold medal winner
and reigning WWE Champion, Kurt Angle?
We'll find out this Sunday on pay-per-view.
And we invite all of our great WWE fans
to join us live and in person in the New Orleans Arena.
[Lawler] What a huge match-up that's gonna be.
And, of course, Stephanie's gonna be in the corner of her husband, Triple H,
but what about Kurt Angle's corner?
[Ross] He's got Trish Stratus in his corner.
So Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley will be at ringside with her husband.
[Lawler] Yeah, you know, some sparks are gonna fly there.
Stephanie and Trish? They can't stand each other.
[Ross] And the person with Trish's alleged relationship…
-[Lawler] Oh, wait, wait. -…is Stephanie's father, Mr. McMahon.
[Lawler] Hold it now, JR, don't go there.
[Ross] I said alleged, King.
[Lawler] But you're still putting it in people's mind.
You're planting that seed.
[Ross] Well, I'm not gonna talk about planting seeds.
[Lawler chuckles]
[Ross] And The Game… is back.
He is better than a 100%,
and he cost Stone Cold the WWE Title right here last Monday Night here on Raw.
Austin got a royal screwing by the male member of the first couple.
[crowd booing]
[Ross] Six days and counting to the Royal Rumble.
You know, everywhere I go, it's the same thing.
[crowd clamoring]
[Lawler] Oh, no, not this.
They don't do this everywhere Triple H goes, do they?
[Ross] It's always at the same part of the anatomy.
It's the same thing.
I hear it from everybody I meet.
When I'm at a restaurant,
the waiter comes over and he whispers in my ear…
"Triple H, kick Austin's ass."
-[Lawler] Whoa. -[crowd booing]
-[Ross] I don't believe it. -[Lawler] What do you mean?
When I'm at the airport, as I walk by, I hear people yell,
"Triple H, kick Austin's ass. Give him one for me."
[Lawler] You know what? I hope Austin's not here yet.
When I'm at the hotel, the idiot carrying my bags up to the room,
right before he leaves, he looks back and he says,
"Hey, Triple H…
finish Austin off."
"Finish him for good."
[Ross] He's probably a bad tipper too.
And you know what?
Nothing would make me happier right now
than to drag "Stone Cold" Steve Austin's ass
down that ramp…
dragging him into this ring and finish it.
To beat "Stone Cold" Steve Austin's ass once and for all
right in the middle of this ring,
right in front of each and every one of you.
[Lawler] I'm worried, Triple H may have a stroke here.
Look at the veins in his neck, they're bulging out.
He's incensed.
-But… -[crowd chanting] Austin! Austin! Austin!
[Lawler] Calm down, don't let this rile you up.
[Ross] Listen to this crowd here, chanting for the Rattlesnake.
any more[Lawler] Don't get Triple H any more upset, people.
Oh, you can cheer, but he won't come.
Even Austin is smart enough to know when to stay away.
[Lawler] Uh-oh.
[Ross] I don't think he's here yet.
And tonight, I've made a promise, and I intend to stick to my promise.
So unless I am provoked,
unless I am physically provoked by Steve Austin…
I will leave him alone for the time being.
[Ross] Sure, you will.
[Lawler] Austin is lucky in that respect.
And order will be maintained here tonight.
-[crowd booing] -[Lawler] Thank goodness.
What's wrong with these people now? This is Stephanie talking, show respect.
Hold on a second, Steph. Shut your holes!
[Lawler] There you go.
[crowd booing]
[Ross] Standing up for his wife, King, and…
-[Lawler] You can't blame him. -[Ross] That's a losing battle.
And the man who will maintain that order…
from 2,000 miles away…
live via satellite is my dad, Vince McMahon.
-[crowd booing] -[Lawler] All right!
-Hi, Daddy. -[Mr. McMahon] Hi, Steph, how you doing?
[Stephanie] I'm good.
And, uh, you, Triple H, looking pretty good,
and it's really nice to have your presence back in the squared circle.
It's good to be back.
[Stephanie] How's the XFL?
Well, actually things are going real well with the XFL, I'm glad you asked.
Of course, we're getting ready for the big kick off from February 3
and I'm sorry I really can't be there tonight,
you know, because of my other duties.
And I know that could be somewhat disheartening for WWE fans,
but, nonetheless, I'm sure that, uh,
Steph, I'm sure you'll see that things are, um,
well, very interesting tonight.
And speaking of that,
Triple H, as you well know the conversation that I had with you
and also the conversation that I had with "Stone Cold" Steve Austin
earlier this weekend,
it was well-documented
that if you two individuals clashed in any way,
there's gonna be serious consequences.
For you, Triple H, if you physically provoke "Stone Cold" Steve Austin
in any matter whatsoever,
then, Triple H, you lose your number one contendership.
You will not face Kurt Angle for the WWE Title at the Royal Rumble.
-[Lawler] Oh, my God! Did you hear that? -[Ross] Yeah.
And likewise, if "Stone Cold" Steve Austin in any way, Triple H, provokes you,
Stone Cold will lose his opportunity
to participate in the 30-Man Royal Rumble match-up itself.
[crowd booing]
So, again, we would expect that both you two gentlemen
would conduct yourselves as consummate professionals…
which is something that "Stone Cold" Steve Austin,
quite frankly, did not do, in all fairness, did not do on SmackDown.
Stone Cold interjected himself in the Six-Man Tag Team match-up.
Well, Austin, since you like six-man matches
then why don't we put you in one in that very ring tonight?
-[crowd cheering] -That's right.
Tonight it will be "Stone Cold" Steve Austin teaming up
with… the Dudley Boyz.
-[Lawler] Whoa. -[crowd cheering]
And Austin and the Dudley Boyz will square off against
the Tag Team Champions, Edge and Christian.
And those two will team up
with the World Wrestling Entertainment Champion…
-[Lawler] Oh, my gosh. -…Kurt Angle.
[Ross] What a match that's gonna be.
And by the way, Steph, I won't be able to watch tonight
because I've got a meeting, they're calling for me right now,
but I have my cell phone on,
and if you need me for any reason, don't hesitate to call.
Thanks, Dad.
-[Lawler] What about that, JR? -[Triple H] See you later, Vince.
You know, it's funny that Vince brings up
the World Wrestling Entertainment Champion, Kurt Angle.
You now, I've said it once and I'm gonna say it again,
Kurt Angle is the World Wrestling Entertainment Champion
because I have allowed it.
[crowd booing]
You see, Kurt Angle has not had a one-on-one title defense with me
even though I never actually lost
the World Wrestling Entertainment Championship,
but he's never defended it against me because…
quite frankly, my attention has been diverted elsewhere.
Well, as of right now…
my attention is on Kurt Angle,
my attention is on being
the World Wrestling Entertainment Champion.
And I'm sorry to be the one to inform you, Kurt…
but I'm gonna be the one that ends your illustrious title reign.
And what a title reign it was, Kurt.
I mean…
you know…
getting your brother to hide under the ring at Survivor Series.
Boy, that really showed some nads.
[Ross] Triple H would never do anything like that, would he?
And constantly getting yourselves DQ'd and counted out
and having your little nimrod pals running and save you all the time…
boy, that's something to be really proud of, Kurt.
What a champion.
Well, Kurt, Sunday at the Royal Rumble…
you can bring them all.
You can bring your family, you can bring your friends,
you can bring Nancy Kerrigan,
you can bring Mary Lou Retton,
hell, you can bring the whole 1980 Olympic hockey team,
and it's not gonna make a damn bit of difference
because I will get what I want.
Kurt Angle, I will be
the World Wrestling Entertainment Champion,
and there is not a damn thing you or anybody else can do about it.
[Ross] The number one contender very confident
that this Sunday he's gonna regain the…
["Medal" plays]
[Lawler] Uh-oh!
[Ross] Well, there is the WWE Champion, Kurt Angle,
with a somewhat incredulous look on his face.
[Lawler] Incredulous, to say the least.
[Ross] Kurt Angle in Six-Man Tag Team Match here tonight. However…
Well, well, well, if it isn't my old friends,
the McMahon-Helmsleys.
And, Triple H, I'll get to you in a second.
But, Steph, I have to say that I am very disappointed.
Now, Steph, you know I love you, but… you blew it, babe.
[Lawler] What? What do you mean by that? You don't think…
And I know that Triple H is your husband and all,
but the last time he was champion was when?
King of the Ring?
Which I won incidentally.
And, Triple H, you may be a great athlete…
you may be "The Game"…
but there is no way that you're taking my title from me at the Rumble.
And you wanna talk about games?
Well, Donkey Kong himself
has a better shot of taking this title from me than you do, pal.
[Lawler] Donkey Kong? Wow.
That's pretty strong words.
[Kurt] And the only difference between you and Donkey Kong
is that he is the big smelly ape that people actually like.
[crowd cheering]
[Lawler] Whoa!
Steph, I know that Triple H is your husband,
and I can respect that.
And I'm only hoping that you can respect the fact,
that last week on SmackDown,
I felt the need to get someone in my corner.
[Lawler] Oh, boy.
Oh, boy.
Someone the McMahon-Helmsley family knows quite well.
-[Lawler] What do you mean by that? -[Ross] Uh-oh.
[Kurt] Trish, why don't you come out here and say hello?
[Lawler] Oh, look at Steph.
["Emergency" plays]
There's a little, uh, friction here, to say the least.
Oh, look at Steph.
[Ross] And look at that fur coat… with diamond earrings.
Where do you think she got those?
[Lawler] I don't know where she got them. What do you mean?
Stephanie, Hunter.
Listen, guys, no hard feelings.
You know that I just think the world of you two.
-[Ross] Yeah. All right. -[Lawler] What?
But when Kurt asked me to be in his corner,
I couldn't say no.
-[Lawler] She couldn't? -[Ross] That's her problem.
[Lawler] Hey.
Well, let's face it,
whether it's Kurt Angle or Mr. McMahon himself…
[Ross] Uh-oh.
…I just love a man on top.
-[Lawler] What the… -[crowd cheering]
Oh, no. Oh, boy.
I can't believe she said that.
Well, Trish…
since the word no doesn't seem to be a part of your vocabulary…
[Lawler] Oh.
…then you won't have any problem with the match I'm about to make.
-[Ross] Uh-oh. -[Lawler] Wait a minute.
Because tonight, in this very ring,
you're gonna be in competition
against the former WWE Women's Champion, Jackie.
[Ross] Yeah, well, Jackie is tough.
[Stephanie] Oh, but, Trish…
this isn't going to be any kind of regular match.
-[Lawler] Uh-oh. -No, no.
[Lawler] Oh, what is she thinking of? That devious little mind of hers.
I'm going to make a match more… suitable to your particular talent.
[crowd cheering]
[Lawler] Oh, my gosh. What kind of match could this be?
-You know what type of match? -Tonight, Trish,
your match against Jackie is going to be a Spanking Match.
[crowd cheering]
-[Ross] A Spanking Match? -[Lawler] A Spanking Match?
[Ross] A Spanking Match?
[Lawler] Spanking Match, Spanking Match.
Woo-hoo.
[Ross] Trish and Jackie in a Spanking Match,
but Stone Cold and the Dudleys
to take on Kurt Angle and Edge and Christian here tonight as well.
[Lawler] Oh, we're gonna have a spanking good time tonight, JR.
This is gonna be great. Woo-hoo!
[Ross] The first, the first ever spanking match live tonight.
Are you gonna be all right?
I don't know if I ever not, JR.
I don't know if my heart is gonna be able to stand a Spanking Match tonight.
Spank! Woo-hoo!
Between Trish and Jacqueline, and the reason this match came about,
ladies and gentlemen, this last Thursday on SmackDown,
Mr. McMahon was very distressed to find out that Trish is gonna be
at Kurt Angle's corner at the Royal Rumble.
And they had this exchange.
What are you doing?
Volunteering your services to be in Kurt Angle's corner?
What are you doing, Trish?
You know what? I've been bad. I've been really bad.
In fact, I think that I've been so bad that I deserve spanking.
[crowd cheering]
Well, um…
Come to think of it…
you have been a… a very bad girl.
I can't believe that little slut, Trish.
I hope Trish gets exactly what she deserves tonight.
Yeah, yeah.
You know, Steph, I'm really not so sure how Vince is gonna react
to this whole Spanking Match thing in the first place.
I think you need to calm down, all right?
You just need to relax and calm down.
Well, Dad certainly didn't seem to mind
when Trish got spanked on Thursday night, did he?
No, he didn't.
But speaking of calming down,
you better cool your jets with Austin,
or you're gonna lose your match against Kurt at the Rumble.
I'm not gonna lose anything, all right?
I will keep cool.
But, Steph, I'm telling you right now, if Austin provokes me,
if he gets in my face, it is gonna be on, understand me?
It will be on.
[Ross] Well, Stone Cold's scheduled to be here tonight, King.
And it could be on.
[Lawler] Well, there'll be dire consequences,
well, for one of those two guys,
either Stone Cold or for Triple H, if it does get on.
[bell dinging]
[Lilian] The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and it is for
the World Wrestling Entertainment Hardcore Championship.
Introducing the challenger, weighing in at 282 pounds, Test.
[Ross] Hardcore Title on the line here.
[Lawler] You know what, JR? I've been thinking about something.
I'm just wondering if there's a…
Mr. McMahon, you know the kind of guy he is, he never…
-[Lilian] His opponent… -[Lawler] Shut up, Lilian.
…weighing in at 229 pounds,
he is the World Wrestling Entertainment Hardcore Champion, Raven.
[Lawler] You know Mr. McMahon never does anything that's not calculated,
planned out well in advance.
[Ross] Yeah.
[Lawler] Do you think maybe that… that he's got "Stone Cold" Steve Austin
teaming with the Dudleys tonight because of what happened last week
between "Stone Cold" Steve Austin and the Dudleys?
[Ross] Austin knocked the Dudleys out with those chair shots…
[Lawler] Yeah.
…when he got involved in a Six-Man Tag Team match-up.
I'd like to… I'd like to hope anyway
that the Dudleys are gonna let bygones be bygones.
[Lawler] Give me a break. They got to be partners tonight.
Let me ask you this, this past Monday Night on Raw…
-[Ross] Oh, look out here. -[bell dinging]
…at the end of the show, if I'd hit you over the head with the chair,
would you wanna be my partner here tonight?
-[Ross] Well, hell, no. -[Lawler] Yeah, right.
That's right.
That's what's gonna happen with the Dudleys and Austin tonight.
[Ross] Let's hope that's not the case
as Raven is defending the Hardcore Title here against Test.
Hardcore rules, there must be a winner.
[Lawler] Look out.
[Ross] Pinfalls count anywhere, no disqualifications,
no countouts, anything goes.
[Lawler] You could hope that's not the case all you want to,
but this gotta be the case, I just figured that out.
It's a pre-deduction on my part,
but it's even smarter on the part of Mr. McMahon to come up with it.
[Ross] Stone Cold and the Dudleys
to take on Kurt Angle, Edge, and Christian.
Look how this match got started here.
[Lawler] Oh, my gosh.
[Ross] What a bang, so to speak.
[Lawler] The ring got trashed, and then poor Raven got trashed.
Hey, hey. Wait a minute. Look at this.
[Ross] There's Hardcore Holly with the referee.
He's got a ref with him. That means he's in this match-up.
And there's a fall and a near fall.
-And wait a minute. -[Lawler] What's Blackman doing?
-He's got a ref. -I doubt this is…
This is four men now competing for the Hardcore Title.
[Lawler] Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh, my gosh.
Look out.
[Ross] Reverse elbow by Test off the top
in this unruly Hardcore Championship match-up.
[Lawler] The referees are even confused. They don't know who to count for.
Wait a minute.
[Ross] Well, now Test…
[Lawler] This is just another day in the WWE.
-Oh, wow. -[crowd exclaiming]
[Ross] Test going after Raven who is the Hardcore Champion.
[Lawler] Raven hitting with… What is that?
[Ross] Some sort of street sign or something.
[Lawler] It's a stop sign, I hope. Oh, no!
-Yield. Oh! -[crowd exclaiming]
[Ross] WWE.com. Raven just logged on.
And there's a cover. It could… No.
Steve Blackman, "The Lethal Weapon," stopping it,
and there's a shot from Hardcore Holly on Blackman.
[Lawler] Raven just want to get the heck out of there right now.
Where is he?
[Ross] Well, these hardcore matches are unruly and chaotic.
The rules are not real structured, quite frankly.
[Lawler] There you go. Watch your back.
I bet he's still coming up. Here's Test. Oh!
[Ross] Test kicking that can right back on Raven's face.
Hey, look.
-That's William Regal. -[Lawler] Hey!
[Ross] William Regal, the European Champion.
Oh, man, just…
-He just put Test's lights out. -[ref] One, two, three. Ring the bell.
-[bell dinging] -[Lawler] Anything goes.
[Ross] And Raven with an assist from William Regal.
[Lilian] Here is your winner and still the World Wrestling Entertainment
Hardcore Champion, Raven.
[Ross] Where the hell's Raven going?
[Lawler] I have no idea, but if I were him with all of those guys after me,
I'd get out of here too.
[Ross] Raven leaving the Bradley Center here in Milwaukee,
and there's a waiting automobile.
Who the hell is driving that car?
And look. And now Blackman and Hardcore Holly have to be separated.
What's your problem, Blackman?
If it weren't for you, I'd be the Hardcore Champion right now.
And who you think you're talking to like that?
I run this Hardcore division.
It seems pretty obvious, you want some of me.
No, I don't want some of you.
I wanna beat your entire ass up there in front of the world tonight.
-[Lawler] Oh! -You got it. And I'll lead the way, pal.
Now get your ass moving.
-Hey, hey. -Get off of me.
[Lawler] I wanna see these two just finish this once and for all.
Hey, hey.
[Ross] And Kevin Kelly is gonna talk to The People's Champion.
The Rock, on his way to the Royal Rumble, but he's got a tag match tonight.
Rock, we are six days from the Royal Rumble.
Tonight, you stand side by side with the man you could be toe to toe…
[crowd chanting] Rocky! Rocky! Rocky!
Finally, The Rock has come back to Milwaukee.
[crowd cheering]
So this is how it's going down tonight,
six days away from the biggest Royal Rumble in history,
six days away, tonight, The Rock is in a tag team match.
Partner, The Undertaker, opponents, Rikishi and Kane.
Well, excuse The Rock if he's not cutting backflips.
Excuse The Rock if he's not doing cartwheels
over having his partner be The Undertaker,
'Cause you see, Undertaker,
with what happened between you and The Rock last week,
the week before that, the week before that,
you and The Rock will never ever truly be partners.
But, Undertaker, after tonight, after our brief partnership tonight,
consider our partnership tonight history.
And speaking of history,
today is a very special day to The Rock…
just as it is very special day for every person around the world.
Today is the birthday of another great one.
[crowd cheering]
Today is the birthday of another great one.
Today is the birthday of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
[crowd cheering]
And just like Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. had a dream,
well, just like The Rock has a dream, too.
The Rock has a dream
that he's going to the Royal Rumble,
and body after body after body over the top rope,
one man left standing in the middle of the ring,
one man left standing, and that one man is The Rock.
[crowd cheering]
The Rock has a dream,
has a dream that he's winning the Royal Rumble,
going on to WrestleMania,
and from coast to coast, Wisconsin to China, and back to Wisconsin,
sea to shining sea, The Rock, one more time on top of the mountaintop,
WWE Champion.
[crowd cheering]
And you see, just like Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. had a dream,
we all have dreams,
but there's been one dream that has become a reality of The Rock,
one dream that's been coming true for The Rock.
Day after day, night after night, 24 hours a day,
seven days a week, 365 days a year,
and that one dream is The Rock forever, whooping ass, whooping ass,
thank God Almighty, The Rock is whooping ass.
If you smell what The Rock is cooking.
[Lawler] He's got a dream, JR.
[Ross] Thirty men in the Royal Rumble,
The Rock's got his sight set on winning it this Sunday,
this Sunday on pay-per-view.
Dudley Boyz, this Sunday at the Royal Rumble,
you got Edge and Christian with the Tag Team Titles on the line,
but first, tonight, a Six-Man Tag Team match-up.
Kurt Angle teams with Edge and Christian to take on the Dudley Boyz
and the man who hit you both in the head with a chair on SmackDown Thursday night,
"Stone Cold" Steve Austin.
Kurt Angle, Christian, and Edge, tonight you will receive a little taste
of what you're gonna get at the Royal Rumble,
because you see, there will be no rest for you,
and there will be no escape.
Ha! Oh, my brother, Bubba, testify.
Don't worry, Austin, the Dudley Boyz understand
that a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do.
But when tonight is over and we leave Edge, Christian, and Angle
left layin' in the middle of the ring,
it is then, Stone Cold,
that you and the Dudleys will have a little Dudleyville discussion.
-[Ross] What? -[Lawler] Uh-oh.
I don't like the sounds of that, JR.
What do you think they mean by a Dudleyville discussion with Stone Cold?
Vince, do you remember when I did The Drew Carey Show?
-[Mr. McMahon] Yeah. -All right.
Well, his manager called earlier today.
It turns out Drew Carey is like a huge mark for me,
and, uh, he wants to do something with the Rumble.
I don't know.
That's all right with me,
but you guys called me because of Drew Carey
wanting to be in the Royal Rumble?
No, no, Dad, we called because The Rock just said
something very interesting in his interview.
Rock doesn't seem too happy
about teaming up with The Undertaker tonight.
I think I can understand that.
If that's the case, if he's unhappy, let's make him happy then.
Why not take Rock and team him up with Kane
to square off against The Undertaker and Rikishi? Yeah, huh?
Rock and Kane versus Undertaker and Rikishi.
Maybe that will make him happy.
That will make him very happy.
Matter of fact, that makes everybody happy.
-It's good for all. -Try not to bottleneck it, guys, please.
-Vince, you're a genius. -Thanks.
Have a good meeting.
[Ross] On a cold snowy night in Milwaukee, Wisconsin,
we're in the Bradley Center,
we're sold out and red hot on our way to the Royal Rumble.
And King, I'll tell you, Mr. McMahon, 2,000 miles away,
still running the WWE with an iron hand.
[Lawler] What do you mean with an iron hand?
He's making decisions all the time.
Hey, check it out.
[crowd cheering]
Milwaukee Bucks.
[Ross] Sam Cassell, Tim Thomas of the Milwaukee Bucks
here in the front row.
Mr. McMahon wanting to make The Rock happy, King.
Hey, guys! I'll give you an autograph in a minute.
I'll be over there. What?
Mr. McMahon wanna make The Rock happy, so now he's gonna team The Rock with Kane,
The Undertaker and Rikishi, what's that about?
Well, it's about fairness.
You know, Mr. McMahon is all about fairness these days, that's all.
-["Rollin'" plays] -Uh-oh.
[crowd cheering]
-[The Undertaker] Deadman walking. -[Lawler] Ah!
♪ Keep rollin', rollin', rollin', rollin' Yeah ♪
♪ Keep rollin', rollin', rollin'… ♪
[Ross] With the sounds of Limp Bizkit,
the fans are on their feet in the Bradley Center.
For our man, this is gonna be one of 30 in the Royal Rumble this Sunday,
a pay-per-view extravaganza that you cannot afford to miss.
Thirty men in the Royal Rumble,
two men will start, another enters every two minutes.
The only way to be eliminated is to be thrown over the top rope
and both feet touching the ground.
[Lawler] Oh. Can't afford to miss that.
I'm always glad
that The Undertaker misses us when he comes by on that huge bike.
One of these nights, he could just run right over us, JR.
[Ross] 6'10", 325 pounds of American Badass.
And the winner of the Royal Rumble
is automatic to the main event at WrestleMania
and will challenge the WWE Champion, whoever that may be.
[Lawler] Oh.
["Bad Man" plays]
[Ross] And here's the man that will be number 30 in the 30-Man Royal Rumble.
[Lawler] He's a bad man. Woo-hoo!
[Ross] Rikishi tough enough to survive
being tossed off at the top of the Hell in a Cell cage
last month at Armageddon.
And speaking of tough enough, fans who'd like a career in the WWE,
would you like to be a part of a brand new television show?
Applications are available at WWE.com, King.
[Lawler] Unbelievable.
If you're the winner, you're gonna get a WWE contract,
a career right here in the World Wrestling Entertainment.
[Ross] Check it out at WWE.com, and be a part,
if you think you're tough enough, of a brand new television show…
[Lawler] On your TV.
[Ross] …and to be a part of… Oh, my. Of the WWE.
["Out of the Fire" plays]
[crowd cheering]
[bell dinging]
[Lilian] The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall.
Introducing the opponent, first, weighing in at 326 pounds, Kane.
[Ross] So thanks to Mr. McMahon,
it will now be Kane and The Rock as partners,
I use that term loosely,
against The Undertaker and Rikishi as partners.
[Lawler] Well, you heard The Rock saying right out of his own mouth,
he wasn't happy being partners with The Undertaker,
so now he's gonna… Ah! Jesus!
[Ross] The Big Red Machine, the brother of The Undertaker.
Man, this has got slobberknocker written all over it.
♪ If you smell What The Rock is cookin'… ♪
[crowd cheering]
[Lilian] His tag team partner, from Miami, Florida,
weighing in at 270 pounds, The Rock.
[Lawler] Well, JR, The Rock said he had a dream,
but I bet he never dreamed he'd be partnered
with The Big Red Machine tonight. [chuckles]
It may turn out to be a nightmare.
[Ross] And a bad nightmare you can't ever wake up from.
The Rock, The People's Champion,
all four of these men will be in the Royal Rumble.
Thirty! Thirty men competing for the opportunity
to wrestle the WWE Champion at WrestleMania.
It all comes down to this Sunday.
This Sunday, the extravaganza of extravaganzas,
and it's exclusively on pay-per-view.
[Lawler] Check out your partner, Rock, what do you think?
Are you happy with him? That makes you happy?
Whoa!
[Ross] I hope our fans in the Crescent City
will plan on joining us live in the beautiful New Orleans Arena.
And The Rock now.
[Lawler] The Rock doesn't look happy, does he?
[Ross] He certainly does not.
-The Rock reluctantly… -[bell dinging]
…teaming with Kane…
with the an eleventh hour appeal, so to speak, by Mr. McMahon.
So The Rock and Kane are partners,
and The Undertaker and Rikishi are partners.
And there's the answer, no love lost in either corner.
[Lawler] Oh, this is gonna be great. I can't wait for this.
I can't wait for that Spanking Match either,
but I can't wait for this.
[Ross] Oh, no spankings here.
Trish and Jackie, thanks to Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley,
will have a Spanking Match tonight.
[Lawler] Whoa. Look at that look.
Those looks.
[Ross] Rikishi and The Rock grew up in one large extended family.
They have known each other since they were small boys,
if they were ever small boys.
And here they go.
[crowd cheering]
The Rock, the right hands, and Rikishi, at 400 plus…
retaliates but is quickly countered by The Rock.
-[Lawler] Oh, man. -[crowd cheering]
[Ross] Rikishi taken down with a reverse elbow.
[Lawler] These are four of the biggest Superstars
in the World Wrestling Entertainment.
They all can't stand each other,
but somehow they're gonna have to be partners here.
[Ross] And these four, and 26 others…
-[Lawler] Oh, boy. -…will be in the Royal Rumble this Sunday.
[Lawler] Get ready, Rock.
Whoa!
[Ross] The Rock exploded out of the corner and takes the 400-pounder down.
And Kane got the blind tag.
Kane tagged himself in.
There's no teamwork in either corner,
and I don't think we should expect to see any.
[Lawler] No, we're just gonna see four individuals
trying to beat the hell out of each other.
[Ross] And don't forget, Stone Cold and the Dudleys
will join forces tonight against Kurt Angle and Edge and Christian.
Samoan drop.
[Lawler] Yeah. I can't wait to see that either.
Like I said, JR, what do you think is gonna happen?
The Dudleys, they've already admitted
they're gonna have a little Dudleyville discussion
-with Stone Cold. -[Ross] But what does that mean?
[Lawler] Oh, I don't know. It might be a sit-down discussion,
maybe some chairs involved, who knows.
-[Ross] Not a table, you don't think. -[Lawler] Uh-oh, look at this.
[Ross] Wow. Ugh.
-[Lawler] Look out! Here it comes! -[all exclaiming]
[Ross] Don't touch your television sets.
A bit like the Discovery Channel, a tour of the Grand Canyon.
[Lawler] Don't think Trish's bottom is gonna look like that
in that Spanking Match, do you?
[Ross] I don't think Trish's bottom could ever look like that.
Kane looking to hook up Rikishi and take him for a ride here.
These four men, as we said,
with 26 others in the Royal Rumble match itself
this Sunday from the New Orleans Arena.
What a pay-per-view it's gonna be.
[Lawler] Oh, my gosh, you're kidding me. He slammed Rikishi.
[Ross] That's 420 pounds.
[Lawler] He slammed Rikishi!
[Ross] That Kane, he is animal strong.
[Lawler] I cannot believe my eyes.
Rikishi's animal heavy.
[Ross] Big Red Machine, poised on the top,
and takes down Rikishi with a hellacious clothesline.
[Lawler] Let's face it, JR,
I think each one of these guys have a dream,
they all dream about winning the Royal Rumble
and going on and being the champion at WrestleMania. Oh!
[Ross] What a tag.
[Lawler] That's a tag?
[Ross] The Undertaker and Kane, they are brothers,
estranged at best, but they are brothers, and they're about to get it on here.
[Lawler] That's the strangest tag.
[Ross] And The Rock just tagged himself back in.
[Lawler] Look at this!
[Ross] And The Undertaker ready for The Rock,
meeting The People's Champion with the right hands.
It's reversed now.
-The Rock with the overhand rights. -Ooh!
[Ross] And The Undertaker taking The Rock down with that size 18,
right in the face.
There's an elbow, there's the cover!
And a near fall here.
The Undertaker and The Rock were…
[Lawler] This is one of the most original tags
I've ever seen right there.
Love it!
-[Ross] Deadman walking tag. -Yeah.
[Ross] The Rock and The Undertaker were gonna be partners here tonight,
but Mr. McMahon wanted to make The Rock…
[Lawler] No, no, no. Yeah, right. Rock was unhappy with that.
[crowd chanting] Rocky! Rocky! Rocky!
[Ross] Reverse elbow by The Undertaker.
And The Rock fights back.
Every man for himself, seemingly, in this match-up,
just like it will be this Sunday at the Royal Rumble.
[Lawler] Uh-oh.
Undertaker ready to get down and dirty now.
Look out, Rock.
[Ross] The Rock on dream street here in Milwaukee.
[The Undertaker] Old School!
[Lawler] Did you hear The Undertaker? He said Old School.
He's about to take The Rock to school
the way he took so many WWE Superstars to school.
Oh!
[Ross] And The Undertaker hammering The Rock down
after coming off the top rope with that six-ten,
325-pound frame.
And The Rock fights back with the right hand that scores.
The Rock's scoring repeatedly with the right hands,
but The Undertaker won't go down.
[Lawler] Just think these guys were supposed to be partners
in this match-up.
Whoa, double clothesline.
[Ross] What a midair collision that was.
And these two men are down.
Remember, at the Royal Rumble,
the only way to be eliminated is to be thrown over the top rope,
and both their feet must touch the floor.
There's no disqualifications at the Royal Rumble.
It will not be for the weak of heart.
[Lawler] I would've thought nobody could've lifted Rikishi
and thrown him over the top rope,
until I saw Kane slam Rikishi a few minutes ago.
I actually saw it.
[Ross] Both men, The Rock and the Undertaker, back up.
And The Rock down to one knee.
The Rock, with the right hand, staggers The Undertaker.
[Lawler] Listen to those shots, JR.
[Ross] Three right hands, The Undertaker still not gone down.
[Lawler] There he is.
[Ross] But the neck breaker
takes the American Badass down to the canvas.
[Lawler] He's right back up.
Unbelievable.
[Ross] And there's another one. A street fight.
Can you imagine what it's gonna be like Sunday
when 30 men vying for one prize in the Royal Rumble?
DDT!
[Lawler] That did it. That did it.
Look out.
[Ross] Rikishi making sure The Rock didn't get the due.
And here comes Kane.
[Lawler] JR, I just gotta say, you seem a little keen up for the Rumble.
Are you ready for it or what?
[Ross] You're damn right, I'm ready for it.
[Lawler] Yeah, you are.
[Ross] Another right hand by Rikishi, and Kane fighting on the outside.
Just keep 'em away from here.
[Lawler] Yeah, no, too late. Look out!
[Ross] The ring bell just took Rikishi's lights and dimmed them.
[Lawler] Oh, boy.
That's it for Rikishi, I'm afraid.
[Ross] So much for The Undertaker's tag team partner here tonight.
-At least you think that anyway. -[Lawler] Look out.
[Ross] Spinebuster by The Rock.
[Ross] Oh, he's waiting.
[Ross] The Rock, poised and waiting on The Undertaker.
And here comes Kane.
-[Lawler] Oh! -[Ross] Kane is The Rock's partner.
[Lawler] Wait a minute.
-What are you doing? -[Ross] A Chokeslam!
Kane just Chokeslammed his partner, The Rock,
and he's leaving The Rock for Kane's brother, The Undertaker.
[Lawler] So much for that partnership.
[crowd booing]
[Ross] Is The Undertaker even aware that The Rock got Chokeslammed by Kane?
[Lawler] I don't know, but I'd say the merger between The Rock and Kane
is definitely dissolved.
[Ross] The Rock barely able to…
Well, he's being pulled up by The Undertaker.
Kane has done the damage.
-[Lawler] Oh, no. -Oh, my.
That's the Last Ride. You gotta be kidding.
[Lawler] That's it.
-Look out. -The Rock trying to counter out of it.
[Lawler] He did.
[Ross] The Rock, who's damn near deadweight here
after the Chokeslam from Kane.
[Lawler] He's gonna get him again.
Oh, my God.
[Ross] That don't look good.
[Lawler] Sorry, Rock.
[Ross] God almighty, what a Last Ride.
First, Kane's Chokeslam, and now The Undertaker's Last Ride.
-[bell dinging] -And this one is over.
-The Undertaker and Rikishi win it. -[Lilian] Here are your winners,
The Undertaker and Rikishi.
[Lawler] And look at Kane.
[Ross] Kane, looking right at his brother, and The Undertaker, looking back.
[Lawler] Hey, wait a minute. You don't think…
[Ross] Oh, King, if that…
If we're thinking the same thing, I think we are.
But The Undertaker and Kane, the…
[Lawler] I don't know. I can't read anything.
Everybody is looking at everybody and…
[Ross] Could The Undertaker and Kane be on the same page?
[Lawler] That's a scary thought right there, JR.
[Ross] But Kane and The Undertaker,
could they join forces one time this Sunday?
-Could it happen? -[Lawler] Well, take a look at this.
These men are partners in this match.
Kane delivered a huge Chokeslam to The Rock, his own partner.
[Ross] And then, The Undertaker's Last Ride…
a defenseless Rock…
being driven violently into the canvas.
[Lawler] Hey, check it out, JR.
It's that Rabid Wolverine
and that ladder.
[Ross] Benoit and Jericho, the Ladder Match…
Wait a minute.
-I think Benoit is coming our way. -[Lawler] Uh-oh.
[Ross] Ladies and gentlemen, in just a couple of moments ago,
The Rock had delivered the spinebuster, waiting on the,
looked like the Rock Bottom for The Undertaker
in this tag team match-up,
when The Rock's partner, Kane, dissolved the partnership.
[Lawler] You got that right. Oh!
That's a how a partnership is ended emphatically.
[Ross] And then Kane set The Rock up for The Undertaker's Last Ride.
Are we to believe that The Undertaker and Kane
could be on the same page this Sunday at the Royal Rumble?
[Lawler] Well, we'd see a stare down there between the two.
We definitely saw the end of one partnership,
we may have seen the beginning of another one,
partnership between Kane and The Undertaker.
["Shooter" plays]
[Lilian] Ladies and gentlemen,
please welcome the World Wrestling Entertainment
Intercontinental Champion, Chris Benoit.
[Ross] On our way to the great state of Louisiana,
the Intercontinental Champion, Chris Benoit,
in the New Orleans Arena, at the Royal Rumble this Sunday,
will defend the Intercontinental Championship
in a Ladder Match against Chris Jericho.
And speaking of Louisiana, I always love going to that state.
Well, that's not enough.
We're gonna be in Lafayette at the CAJUNDOME
where our fans can join us there live for WWE Raw.
And what the hell is Benoit thinking?
-What is he doing up there? -[Lawler] I have no idea.
Didn't know wolverines were such good climbers.
[Ross] That's too high for me, I'll tell you.
Chris Jericho…
I've got to hand it to you.
You are, without question, a phenomenal athlete.
In fact, you're one of the premiere performers
in the entire WWE today.
So, when you challenged me
to a Ladder Match for my Intercontinental Title
at the Royal Rumble…
well, I'm not gonna lie to you, I got chills down my spine.
I've been in the ring with a lot of tough guys,
but there is no one, and I mean no one,
that hands it to me quite like you do.
So with that in mind, Jericho,
as a sign of respect for our history,
I've put together a little something.
I like to call this piece "The best of Jericho/Benoit."
[Lawler] What's this, JR?
♪ Come on ♪
♪ You know I got you ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
♪ Break the walls down… ♪
[Lawler] It's like a great music video here. Whoa!
[Ross] I don't see too much offense of Jericho.
[Lawler] Well, he said this was the best of Jericho and Benoit.
[Ross] I guess in Benoit's view. Yeah.
[Lawler] Man, this is a…
This could be a top video on MTV.
[Ross] This is Benoit's rendition of this heated rivalry.
It's not very objective, shall we say, but…
[Lawler] Well, that's sort of the way I remember it.
What? He's really enjoying it.
I love to see a Wolverine have a good time and smile like that.
Uh-oh.
[laughs]
Notice a pattern there, Jericho?
In under a minute, I summed up our entire history.
At Royal Rumble, you'll give it your all,
and you'll give it all you've got.
And it'll be no different than any other time
you stepped into the ring with me.
At the end,
it will be me standing over your prone, defeated body.
And if you think otherwise, Jericho,
well, there is one thing you could do…
but it's something you've yet to do your entire life.
Prove me wrong!
[Lawler] Oh, wow.
'Cause at the Royal Rumble, Jericho…
you're gonna… Why don't shut up and show some respect?
-[Lawler] Look out behind you. -[Ross] There's Jericho.
-[Lawler] Oh, my gosh. -[Ross] Jericho!
Oh, just pushed Benoit off the ladder.
[Lawler] A back fighter.
What's Jericho doing? Look out, watch the ladder. Look out!
[Ross] Jericho came through the crowd.
And now uses a ladder to take Benoit out.
♪ Break the walls down… ♪
[crowd cheering]
[Ross] Jericho giving Benoit a little taste of the ladder
before this Sunday.
Can you imagine?
Benoit, you wanna talk about the best of Jericho?
Well, you can consider that another one of my greatest hits!
[Lawler] Oh.
♪ Break the walls down… ♪
[Ross] Can you imagine the chances these two men will take, King,
this Sunday on pay-per-view at the Royal Rumble in this Ladder Match?
The Intercontinental Title hanging high above the ring,
the first man that climbs the ladder, retrieves the belt,
is the Intercontinental Champion.
[Lawler] Well, Jericho may have made a huge mistake tonight.
Uh-oh, look at this.
[Ross] Stone cold and the Dudleys up next
against Kurt Angle and Edge and Christian,
tag team six-man warfare just around the corner.
As a matter of fact, it is next.
And here comes the… Hey, wait!
-[Lawler] Look out! -[Ross] The Dudleys.
[Bubba] Come on, you want some of this?
[Ross] Well, it's Edge and Christian attacking the Dudleys.
-Oh, my God! -[Lawler] Oh, my God!
[Ross] On the back of Bubba's head.
Come on! Come on, D-Von.
[Ross] D-Von Dudley being assaulted by the Tag Team Champions.
[Christian] Get up!
Come on, D-Von. Come on, Dudley.
-[Lawler] Oh, no. -[Ross] No, no. Don't do this.
[Lawler] Look at this. Boom!
[Ross] Oh, what a Con-Chair-To.
Looks like the WWE Tag Team Champions just gave you two the night off.
[Edge laughs wickedly]
[Ross] Night off? Night off?
They're supposed to be Austin's partners.
That match is supposed to be next.
[Ross] We are back, ladies and gentlemen, live here in Milwaukee.
Moments ago, the Dudleys on their way to the ring,
and they're gonna join Stone Cold in this Six-Man Tag Team match-up,
but Edge and Christian with the assault from behind, King.
And, quite frankly, with the use of those steel chairs.
Bubba Ray and D-Von Dudley,
who will meet Edge and Christian this Sunday at the Royal Rumble,
have been eliminated, in my view.
[Edge] Come on, D-Von.
[Lawler] I think you're right. I think this is what… Wow!
…what the Dudleys would call a Dudleyville discussion.
[Edge] Come on, D-Von. Come on, Dudley.
[Lawler] They were on the wrong end of it.
[Edge] Now!
[Ross] Oh, man. Right in the skull.
Now that's impressive.
Edge and Christian doing a hell of a number on the Dudley Boyz.
I'm telling you what, Austin provokes me tonight,
that's exactly how I'm gonna take Austin out.
You know, which brings up an interesting point.
Since Austin doesn't have any partners now,
you think Austin's gonna take on all three champions by himself tonight?
I don't know. I think I should call Dad.
For what?
["How Do You Like Me Now" plays]
[Ross] That's a good idea, call Daddy.
-What is Austin gonna do? -[Lawler] What do you mean?
It's always a good idea to call Mr. McMahon.
[Ross] Well, this is another impromptu match-up
that came about as the result
of the Hardcore match-up early between Raven and Test.
And Raven with Steve…
William Regal, rather's help, won the… Retained the title.
[Lawler] Yeah, and look at this.
This is becoming a habit of Raven's lately.
He always got a getaway car with somebody driving it for him
waiting in the back.
[chuckles] That's pretty smart.
[Ross] And then Hardcore Holly and Steve Blackman had to be separated.
They both issued a challenge.
They're both very competitive, as you can see here,
and so the match has been signed.
Hardcore Holly, who's in the ring
against "The Lethal Weapon," Steve Blackman.
Now, Blackman…
some say you were the greatest Hardcore Champion in the WWE.
-[Lawler] Ross, you say that. -[Ross] Yeah.
But most say Bob Holly was the greatest Hardcore Champion in the WWE.
[crowd cheering]
So I'm gonna get straight to the point.
Blackman, bring your ass down that ramp and get in this ring,
and let's just see how hardcore you can be.
-[Ross] Man. -[Lawler] Another one of those things.
[Lawler] Be careful what you wish for. You just might get it.
[Ross] So, who Stone Cold's partner is gonna be
against Kurt Angle and Edge and Christian, is my question?
[Lawler] Well, let's speculate a little bit, JR.
[bell dinging]
[Lilian] The following contest is scheduled for one fall…
[Ross] You better get out of the ring, Lilian, is all I could tell you.
-[bell dinging] -[Ross] One fall or not.
-This is not a Hardcore Rules match-up. -Come on!
-[Ross] And these guys… -Come on.
[Ross] Blackman scoring with those kicks to the thigh muscle,
and Hardcore Bob Holly scoring with the right hands.
[Lawler] And Blackman would kick your leg off if you're not careful.
[Ross] These are two of the legitimately toughest guys
that I've ever been around in this business.
[Lawler] They both think they're the kings of hardcore.
But right now, Raven's the Hardcore Champion.
[Ross] Raven is, and Raven conveniently has somebody
waiting in that getaway car, so to speak.
[Lawler] Well, that's very smart.
If I were Raven, I wouldn't even dress at the building.
I'd drive up here with my Hardcore Championship, defend it,
and have a car waiting, too, and drive me away.
You can't trust anybody here in the WWE.
And speaking of not trusting anybody, JR, you mentioned
-who's gonna be Stone Cold's partner? -Yeah.
-[Lawler] Who does Stone Cold trust? -[Ross] He don't trust anybody.
[Lawler] Right. So who's gonna volunteer to be his partner?
[Ross] That's a good question. I don't know the answer to that.
-[Lawler] Uh-oh, look at this. -Also obviously… Uh-oh.
[Lawler] Shoved the ref down.
[Ross] That's not very smart on either of these guys' part.
There's a lot of competitive fire burning here between both these guys,
who, I think, quite frankly, who have a lot of respect for each other.
I may be wrong about that.
That was a low blow right there. That could have been a disqualification.
[Lawler] I think you're wrong about that, JR, judging from what I just saw.
Oh, man.
[Ross] Now, referee Teddy Long is…
[Lawler] He's allowing a lot of leeway here.
-[Ross] He certainly is. -Don't come over here.
[Lawler] And this is not… This is not a Hardcore Rules Match.
But it may turn into one.
[Lawler] You got that right.
Both of these guys think they're the kings of hardcore.
They wanna prove to each other that's the fact, but look at…
Look at the ref now.
[Ross] Referee disarming Hardcore Bob Holly.
And Hardcore Holly just threw the referee out of the ring.
[Lawler] The ref threw the chair out. That was gonna be fun.
Just like a ref to take the fun away. Oh, man!
[Ross] Martial arts kick right to the sternum.
What's the referee doing here?
[Lawler] I think this may turn into a Hardcore Match.
Hey, wait, wait. Where's the ref?
[Ross] Teddy Long is walking away, I think.
-[Lawler] He's leaving. -More refs here.
-Forget them, go back. Go back. -Just leave them?
[Lawler] He's telling the other referees to just let these guys fight.
They don't even need a referee.
[Ross] Well, you gotta have a referee.
Hardcore Holly and Steve Blackman will beat each other to a pulp
with no referee, King.
[Ross] Yeah, they'll beat each other to a pulp,
and your problem with that is?
-[Ross] Well, I mean… -[Lawler chuckles] Right.
[Ross] And both are gonna be in a 30-Man Royal Rumble
if they make it this Sunday.
[Lawler] I don't think they'll make it. Look at the referee.
-Why don't you go over there, JR? -Get your ass down here!
-[Ross] That ain't my job description. -[Lawler] That's right.
-Let's go. -[Lawler] Uh-oh.
[Ross] Holly got a street sign.
[Lawler] Watch your back, Blackman. Whoa!
[Ross] Do not enter my skull with a steel sign.
[Lawler laughs]
-[Lawler] Look at this. -How you like me now, Blackman?
[Lawler] I don't think he likes you at all.
[Ross] Look at the shape of that sign.
["How Do You Like Me Now" plays]
[Lawler] Shaped like Blackman's head.
[Ross] Well, these two men…
How do you like me now, Blackman?
…will be in the Royal Rumble, like it or not,
for both of them, 30-men, Sunday on pay-per-view.
Dad?
Dad, are you there?
[Mr. McMahon] Yes, I'm here, Stephanie. This better be good.
You pulled me out of my other meeting. Now what is it?
Well, it seems as though we have a little problem with Austin's match.
What do you mean?
Edge and Christian just annihilated the Dudley Boyz, Vince.
I mean, the Dudleys aren't gonna make it to the ring tonight.
They're gonna be lucky if they make it to the Rumble.
Oh, I can see the problem.
I had to force the Dudleys to team up with Austin to begin with.
Austin doesn't have any friends,
but if he wants to ask someone to join him,
that's all right with me, but in the event that he doesn't,
in the interest of fairness to our fans,
Austin is just gonna have to go on his own
in a Handicap Match against those three champions.
Oh, and by the way,
just out of curiosity, how's things going on?
How's Rock? How's Kane? Uh, how's Trish?
Essa Rios?
Did you just say Trish?
-Did you just ask how… -How's Trish doing?
[scoffs]
Well, Dad, you'll be sorry that you missed Trish
because she's wearing a brand-spanking-new outfit.
Oh, boy, I sure wish I were there.
I bet you do.
You guys have a good night.
You too.
See you, Vince.
-[Lawler] Uh-oh. -[Ross] Oh, there she is.
-Trish and Jackie in a… -Spank me!
…Sanking Match.
[Lawler] Whoo! Spank me. Spank me, spank her.
-Spank me! Woo-hoo! -[Ross] It's next. It's next.
[Ross] Stone Cold is at a dilemma, King. It's a big problem.
No partners and three opponents here tonight.
The Dudleys have been eliminated by Edge and Christian.
What is Stone Cold going to do?
[Lawler] That's what happens when you don't trust anybody, JR.
["Emergency" plays]
[Ross] King, will you please settle down and get a hold of yourself.
-[Lawler] Oh, my God. -[Ross] That's a bad choice of words.
[Lawler] What do you mean? It's Trish.
It's a Spanking Match, JR.
Oh, I can't wait.
[Ross] King, you're gonna hyperventilate.
-Oh, yes, I am gonna hyperventilate. -[Ross] Remember your heart.
Come on, baby. Trish, I'm over here.
Let me spank… I mean, could I be a part of this match? Huh?
Oh, baby.
-[Ross] Why don't you earn your keep? -[Lawler] Okay.
[Ross] She's gonna give you a spanking, you old…
[Lawler] But tonight Raw is War is brought to you by Stacker 2,
the world's strongest fat burner.
Call 1-800-Lite-Line or visit www.stacker2.com.
[Ross] That's Stacker 2, not Spanker 2.
And by the motor oil that provides maximum protection,
Castrol GTX, drive hard.
[Lawler] And by Chef Boyardee.
Overstuff yourself on Monday nights
with Chef Boyardee Overstuffed and the WWE.
And, JR, have I mentioned lately? I love the WWE.
Wow!
[Ross] And I don't know how much Trish is gonna love this.
-[bell dinging] -["Pretty Mean Sister" plays]
[Lilian] The following contest is a Spanking Match.
Introducing the opponent from Dallas, Texas, Jacqueline.
[Ross] Oh, I'll tell you what, in my view, Jacqueline, pound for pound,
is the toughest female in the WWE,
and I got a feeling that Trish is gonna find out about it.
And I wonder why Stephanie and Triple H didn't tell Mr. McMahon about this match.
[Lawler] JR, this is pure athletic competition,
and I just feel sorry that poor Mr. McMahon
is not getting to see this live.
I wonder what he's gonna think about this. Look out.
[Ross] Oh, my!
[Lawler] I'll tape it for you, Vince.
[Ross] Good God almighty.
Trish has been taken to the woods here,
and whipped like a government mule by Jackie.
[Lawler] Watch it. She's no mule, JR, she's a third…
Uh-oh, here we go.
[Ross] Oh, wow. Did you hear that leather hit the flesh of Jacqueline?
[Lawler] Yeah, I did. Oh, look out, Trish.
[Ross] Trish is gonna be in Kurt Angle's corner this Sunday…
-[Lawler] Turn her over. -…at the Royal Rumble.
[Lawler] Spank, spank, spank. Oh, wait a minute.
[Ross] Oh, my. Exposing the skin.
[Lawler] I gotta run to the bathroom. Look out.
[Ross] Don't get up now. You'll embarrass all of us.
-[Lawler] Oh, my gosh, look at this. -[Ross] Good God almighty.
Man, Stephanie had a hell of an idea. Wait a minute.
-[Lawler] Wait a minute. -[Ross] There's Kurt Angle.
[Lawler] Kurt, what are you doing?
Leave her alone, that's enough.
-You don't need to be doing this. -[Lawler] That's enough.
Hell, spank Trish's perfectly…
Whoa!
[Ross] Oh, Trish taking down Jackie with that leather strap
and whipping Jackie like a dog.
[Lawler] There you go, right there. Look out.
-[Ross] No time for elbows. -[Lawler] Stick to the spanking.
Stick to the spanking.
[Ross] Kurt Angle trying to pull Trish's arms.
[all exclaiming]
Oh, my God!
[Lawler] Oh, I'm losing it, JR. Oh, my God!
[Ross] Trish's bare bottom…
-[Lawler] Yes! -…got spanked.
I can't believe it.
[Lawler] This is the greatest night of my life.
Replay, replay. Give me a replay.
You think you're a woman?
Replay, quick.
[Ross] Maybe you ought to go see how bad Trish is hurt.
[Lawler] I will.
And I guarantee she needs to be massaged.
Where's the replay?
[Ross] Man, what a rumble.
What a rumble we just saw.
[Lawler] What a rumble we just saw.
-[Ross] And we are back. -[Lawler] Okay, okay, JR. I'm back.
-[Ross] Where have you been? -[Lawler] Huh? Uh, phone call.
[Ross] Just moments ago, Kurt Angle…
-[Lawler] Yeah, replay. -[Ross] …pulled Trish Stratus
out of a hell of a situation here.
[Lawler] Oh, boy. Watch this, everybody.
Here's the replay.
Woo-hoo! Oh, this is the greatest thing I've ever seen.
Oh, yes!
Give me another angle. Come on, give me another angle.
I can't see it.
[Ross] Please, settle down.
[Lawler] Give me another replay.
♪ Oh, you didn't know? ♪
[K-Kwik] ♪ Damn right, no doubt about it Milwaukee, it's time to get rowdy ♪
["Get Rowdy" plays]
♪ We getting rowdy About to move some things ♪
♪ Move some things ♪
♪ Let me hear you say move some things ♪
♪ Say move some things ♪
[Lawler] Yeah. It's time for you to sit down, JR.
Don't try to dance.
[Ross] I think I just pulled something.
[Lawler] I guess. I did, too.
[Ross] Easy.
What's up, Milwaukee?
[crowd cheering]
[Ross] What a night we are having.
Certainly wanna settle all our fans in Cleveland
and invite you to join us later on this month
as well as Philadelphia on Super Bowl Sunday in Philly.
[Lawler] Hello, Cleveland.
Oh, what a night this has been, JR. This is great.
["If You Dare" plays]
[Ross] What an unusual six-man pairing here.
Tazz and Kai En Tai.
As they will face K-Kwik, the rookie, and Too Cool.
You know, you gotta love these guys.
You gotta. You gotta love these two silly little ninja freaks.
[laughs]
Especially what they did on my show last night,
Sunday Night Heat, to Two Fools.
-[Tazz laughs] -[Lawler] Uh-oh, Two Fools.
[in English] Oh, Tazz, Mr. Red Hook, your words, they amuse me.
Two Fools, clever.
By replacing the letter "C" with the letter "F,"
you have completely changed their name.
Therefore, it is funny.
[laughs] Well done, my thug friend.
[Ross] What is…
[in English] Indeed.
-[Ross] Well… -[Lawler chuckles]
-[bell dinging] -[Lawler] What?
[Ross] Take that for what it is.
[Lawler] Just like a cheap Godzilla movie.
-That's what it is. -[Ross] It sure is.
-[Lawler] Indeed. -[Ross] Indeed, it is.
So Six-Man Tag Team action,
and, well, these guys have got partners with…
That's one thing Stone Cold does not.
Stone cold has gotta find some partners,
if he's even looking, and I, quite frankly…
am not sure that's even taking place.
Stone Cold cannot go in the ring
with Kurt Angle, the WWE Champion, and Edge and Christian, the Tag Champions,
-by himself. -[Lawler] Let me ask you this,
can you ever recall the time when Austin ever asked for help from anybody?
-[Ross] Oh, no, I can't. -I can't either.
So what does that mean?
[Ross] Well, it would… Stone Cold is a very bright individual.
He's not stupid enough to try to wrestle Edge and Christian and Kurt Angle
all by himself live here tonight.
[Lawler] Well, if he's not gonna wrestle them by himself,
he's gonna… Oh, wow.
He's gonna to ask for help from somebody.
And have you ever known Stone Cold to do that?
-No. -[Ross] Well, no, quite frankly, no.
[Lawler] What's his motto? DTA.
-[Ross] Don't trust anybody. -[Lawler] Right.
[Ross] And Too Cool trusted Kai En Tai last night on MTV's Heat.
-[Lawler] Oh, look out. -That didn't get them anywhere,
neither will that.
Shut up!
[Lawler] This is a weird partnership, Tazz and Kai En Tai.
[Ross] Yeah, really.
Nice drop toe-hold, good team work.
Into the Camel Clutch by Sho Funaki.
And the exposed face of Grandmaster Sexay…
-[Lawler] Speaking of exposed… -[Ross] Drop kick.
[Lawler] Speaking of exposed, JR,
was that Spanking Match not the greatest thing you've seen?
[Ross] Where did you go during the commercial break?
[Lawler] I told you I had a phone call.
Well, I was really getting a little concerned for Trish's…
Her jiggle derriere.
[Ross] Was that a local call?
[Lawler] She might need some salve rubbed on her or something.
[Ross] I'm sure you'll volunteer for that duty.
[Lawler] Always trying to help.
[Ross] Tazz hammering away at Grandmaster Sexay.
Get him out of the corner.
[Ross] And a snapmare out of the corner.
Well, Stone Cold may have to swallow some of that stubbornness,
that Texas pride of his, and reach out for someone to be his tag team partners.
[Lawler] He needs them, but I don't… Ooh.
[Ross] It has not been a good seven days for Austin,
who got screwed out of the WWE Title by Triple H
here last Monday night here on Raw.
[Lawler] Scotty 2 Hotty getting this sold-out crowd
into this match here.
[Ross] And, you know, heading back to Phoenix and Washington, D.C.,
tickets go on sale this Saturday in Phoenix and in D.C.
-They won't last long, folks. -[Lawler] Wow!
[Ross] What a beautiful move by this charismatic young rookie, K-Kwik.
[Lawler] Wo-hoo! Oh.
This guy is impressive, isn't he?
What would happen to you if you try that move, JR?
-[Ross] Well, I'd hurt myself. -[Lawler] I guess.
Oh, look out. Man!
[Ross] And K-Kwik.
[Lawler] He's all over the place. Uh-oh, look out. Wow!
[Ross] Nice knockdown on Funaki and Taka Michinoku, the reverse heel kick.
Grandmaster and Scotty 2 Hotty now in.
[Lawler] You know what I'm wondering, JR?
I wonder if we're gonna see the Worm. I think we are.
Are you ready for the… Look at his hair standing straight up, it's shaking.
[Ross] I think it is Worm time.
-[Lawler] Yes. W-O-R-M. -[crowd] W-O-R-M.
[crowd cheering]
[Lawler] There is it, JR.
[Ross] A Milwaukee Worm.
Hold the cheese, please.
[Lawler] I think that Worm may have provoked Tazz, but…
[Ross] Oh, what a shot there by K-Kwik knocking down Tazz.
And Funaki with a dropkick right to the temple of K-Kwik.
[Lawler] Look out.
Hey.
[Ross] And Tazz with a Tazzmission on K-Kwik.
[Lawler] He's got him.
-[Ross] Tazz… -[Lawler] He's got it cinched in.
-[Ross] He's got it cinched in indeed. -[bell dinging]
And it's over.
["If You Dare" plays]
The Tazzmission did the trick
-on the young rookie, K-Kwik. -[Taka in English] Cut the music!
Cut the music, baby.
Cut the music.
By the power of Thor, it is clear you have become just another victim.
[laughs]
-[Ross] Uh-oh. -[in English] Indeed.
[Lawler] Their voice almost matched that time.
[Ross] Oh, stop it.
[Lawler] Let me ask you this question.
Do you think that Stone Cold is gonna provoke Triple H?
-Do you think he'll do that tonight? -[Ross] Don't you?
-Is she all right? -Oh, yeah. [groans]
You're gonna be okay?
You know, I am disappointed in Stephanie for even putting you in this match.
I know, me too. But you know what? It's your match.
I wanna come to your match. Just focus on that right now.
Trish, Trish, listen, listen.
You go back to the hotel, put salve on that or something, you know.
Just rest up for the Rumble.
It's gonna be three-on-one tonight.
It's me, Edge, and Christian against Austin.
And even if it's not, I can handle Austin, okay?
You just go back and ice that thing or whatever.
-Yeah? -Okay?
-Okay. -A night off.
-Good job, Trish. -All right.
-Bye. -Good luck.
Thank you.
[Lawler] Ice that thing, baby. Woo-hoo!
We are back, ladies and gentlemen. Welcome back to Raw.
Jim Ross and Jerry "The King" Lawler here with you.
Folks, let's take you back
to another illustrious Royal Rumble moment.
Let's take you back to last year's Royal Rumble.
I'm sure you'll remember this.
[narrator] And now, a WWE Royal Rumble replay.
[Ross] Oh, Too Cool.
[Lawler] I don't think they wanna see 'em fight,
they wanna see him get down.
[Ross] But we've seen it all.
We're gonna dance a little while.
Oh, Rikishi just took down his boys.
Remember, it's every man for yourself here.
[Lawler] Wait a minute.
[Ross] And Rikishi just eliminated Too Cool simultaneously.
[Lawler] What a rough dance partner.
[Ross] And there you see Stone Cold and no partners in sight, King.
[Lawler] Come on, swallow that pride, Rattlesnake.
Beg somebody.
Austin's getting ready to go one-on-three with the champs.
I knew Austin had no friends.
It's too bad. You know what?
[whispers]
[chuckles]
Oh, that is good. That is so good.
Austin will provoke me.
I can feel it.
Austin will provoke me.
[Ross] What in the hell are they talking about?
Well, folks, are you tough enough to become a WWE Superstar?
Are you tough enough to be a part of a brand-new television show?
If you think you are, male or female, then log on to WWE.com
for the all the information, King.
[Lawler] Unbelievable.
The winner of Tough Enough is gonna get a WWE contract
and a career right here in the World Wrestling Entertainment.
[Ross] Well, ladies and gentlemen, last night on MTV's Heat,
Ivory made a challenge to Chyna.
And Chyna, who surprised us all by returning here tonight,
threw Ivory back in the ring, which caused Ivory and RTC a match.
[Lawler] Look at the look on Ivory's face, she couldn't believe that Chyna's back.
And then she got backed up right here by Lita.
Watch Ivory's face get planted. Ooh!
[Ross] And here was Chyna's response
-to Ivory's challenge last night. -[bell dinging]
Last night, you issued a challenge to me for your precious little Women's Title
knowing that I wouldn't show up.
Knowing that I wasn't 100% physically well.
Well, be careful what you ask for, Ivory, 'cause you just might get it.
[crowd cheering]
I accept your challenge,
and I will be there Sunday at the Royal Rumble.
And according to my schedule,
you have about five days of physical well-being.
[Ross] What?
King, I know that Chyna was getting on Ivory,
-but Chyna's not 100%. -I don't know if that's a good idea.
Sometimes you make hasty decisions, and they come back to haunt you later.
I would wait if I were Chyna till I was 100% to take on Ivory.
I think you're right about that. Ladies and gentlemen,
in WWE New York tonight, of course in the heart of Times Square,
it is "The One" Billy Gunn who is in the inside WWE New York.
[Lawler] They're rocking inside WWE New York. There's Billy. Hey.
[Ross] Billy, JR and The King here in Milwaukee,
and Chyna's gonna step back in the ring this Sunday at the Royal Rumble.
What are your thoughts about your friend
getting back in the ring Sunday against Ivory?
Well, how do I feel?
I love her to death, but personally, I think it's too soon for Chyna…
because she's not 100% and that makes me a little worried.
[crowd cheering]
But she's gotta do what she's gotta do, and I'll support her all I can,
so I hope Chyna beats the hell out of Ivory.
-[Lawler] Oh, yeah, there you go. -Now, for the rest of Right to Censor,
I'll be looking forward to seeing them at the Royal Rumble.
You see, at the Rumble,
a lot of guys are getting counted out, and I better not be one of them.
You see, when 29 other guys are eliminated from that ring
and only one man remains,
JR, don't be surprised if it's not "The One" Billy Gunn.
[Ross] All right, Billy, best of luck to you this Sunday.
High stakes can't get any higher this Sunday on pay-per-view,
and especially to all our fans there at WWE New York.
-[Lawler] Uh-oh. -[Ross] And here comes three men,
Kurt Angle, Edge, and Christian, they're gonna meet Stone Cold.
[Lawler] Three-on-one!
-[Lawler] Three-on-one. -[Ross] This is not good.
[Ross] We are back, ladies and gentleman.
Even though Mr. McMahon's 2,000 miles away,
he assigned the Dudleys and Stone Cold
to meet Edge and Christian and Kurt Angle here tonight,
but as the Dudleys were on their way to the ring, King,
they were taken out emphatically by the WWE Tag Team Champions.
And the educated steel chairs at their disposal.
[Lawler] Taken out is putting it lightly, JR.
These guys are not only able to compete tonight,
I'm wondering if they're gonna be able to make it to the Royal Rumble after this.
[Ross] But the problem is, is that Stone Cold…
Oh, look at this, Con-Chair-To.
…has no partners.
It's gonna be one versus three.
["Glass Shatters" plays]
-[Lawler] Oh! -[crowd cheering]
[Ross] Here in Milwaukee,
and The Rattlesnake with no tag team partners,
coming alone to beat three men.
And this is not a good decision by The Rattlesnake.
I wish he had rather recruit a couple of partners here, King.
[Lawler] Well, your reflect yourself, JR. You don't trust anybody,
and you don't find anybody that wants to help you out.
I just wonder what Triple H meant
when he said Stone Cold is gonna provoke him here tonight.
[Ross] Well, Austin and Triple H cannot provoke each other here.
[Lawler] Well, 1-800-COLLECT presents the WWE's Royal Rumble,
1-800-COLLECT, the easy way to save.
And, JR, the Royal Rumble will be live in six days this Sunday
from the New Orleans Arena in New Orleans, Louisiana,
exclusively on pay-per-view.
[Ross] Well, we know that if Stone Cold and Triple H provoke each other
and they get physical tonight,
that they're both out of the Royal Rumble, as ordered by the CEO of this company,
chairman, I should say, Mr. McMahon.
[Lawler] Look at this Rattlesnake, how cocky is he?
Who does he think he is?
Super Stone Cold?
I mean, he's out here to take on three men by himself?
["Medal" plays]
[Ross] Three WWE Champions.
The man that Stone Cold had beaten for the WWE Title last Monday night…
if it hadn't been for Triple H.
[bell dinging]
[Lilian] The following contest is scheduled for one fall.
Introducing the opponents, at a combined weight of 692 pounds,
the World Wrestling Entertainment Tag Team Champions,
Edge and Christian,
and the World Wrestling Entertainment Champion, Kurt Angle.
[Lawler] Why is Austin smiling?
[Ross] I don't know why in the hell is Austin smiling.
He's got nothing to smile about here.
-Three against to one is… -["Protection" plays]
-[Lawler] Got a death wish. -Oh, wait a minute.
-[Lawler] What's this? -[Ross] Wait a minute.
Here comes The Acolytes, here comes APA.
[bell dinging]
Bradshaw and Farooq.
I think Austin's recruited the APA to join him.
[Lawler] That's why The Rattlesnake was smiling.
He knew all along.
That Rattle son of a…
[Ross] Two more beer drinking, ass kicking men.
Bradshaw and Farooq have joined Austin
in this Six-Man Tag Team match-up.
[Lawler] You got that right.
The old drinking buddies have reunited here.
This is awful.
[Ross] Austin set the trap and led us all to believe
he was not gonna have any partners after Edge and…
-Get out of there, Kurt. -That's a good idea.
[Ross] Angle tagged Christian in.
Austin outsmarted everybody, including his adversaries, here tonight.
[Lawler] Oh, look out.
Ooh, that huge cowboy boot right in the face of Christian.
Oh.
[Ross] Bradshaw and Farooq both wearing those cowboy boots.
And you know what that could mean.
[Lawler] What?
[Ross] That means they're gonna put them on somebody's face.
[Lawler] Oh, no, oh.
[Ross] Oh, man, Bradshaw.
The clubbing forearm to the back of one half of the Tag Team Champions.
[Lawler] Come on, Christian, do something. Oh, no, not that.
[Ross] Bradshaw and Farooq are two of the 30 men
in the Royal Rumble Match this Sunday on pay-per-view.
Hey, they could be whooping each other's ass on Sunday.
And Kurt Angle in to make sure that we didn't see a powerbomb.
[Lawler] Wouldn't that be ironic?
APA busted up, having to fight each other.
And you're right, that could happen Sunday.
[Ross] And a knockdown by Bradshaw.
[Lawler] Oh, look out.
-Look out. Ooh! -[Ross] What a suplex.
And there's the tag. Here comes Farooq.
Stone cold has outsmarted his adversaries here tonight.
-[Lawler] Oh! -[Ross] That's why Austin was smiling.
But Austin wasn't smiling last Monday night
when he had the WWE Title won
and got screwed right out of it by Triple H.
[Lawler] Listen to these people, they are absolutely electric here tonight.
Well, I'll you what I was thinking,
The Acolytes, they may be getting along with Austin here tonight,
but they could be his adversary in the Royal Rumble.
[Ross] They could be?
They will be his adversary this Sunday on pay-per-view.
It will be every man for himself. All 30 of them.
-[crowd chanting] -[Lawler] Listen to these people.
[Ross] But, King, think about it. If you win the Royal Rumble,
you're guaranteed to be in the main event at WrestleMania,
and you're guaranteed to meet the WWE Champion.
[Lawler] Uh-oh, here we go. Now, this is what I wanna see.
This is where…
This is where Kurt Angle has a chance to prove his point.
He said he's gonna beat Stone Cold and I believe him.
He had Stone Cold beat.
Prove it again, Kurt. And show the world.
-[Ross] Are you you hallucinating? -[Lawler] What do you mean?
[Ross] Well, a suplex, that's what we saw last week,
a whole series of suplex is delivered by Kurt Angle on Stone Cold.
[Lawler] Oh, there's another.
[Ross] And another aggressive, violent suplex
propping Austin right back on his neck and head.
[Lawler] That's really taking it out of the old Rattlesnake now, hasn't it?
I know what you're talking about. Just because Stone Cold…
-Uh-oh, look out. Another… Oh, no. -[Ross] Oh, Austin.
Austin landing almost on his feet
and fighting back in those Texas-sized right hands.
[Lawler] Oh, look at that move. Beautiful.
Wow, another one, another duck. Uh-oh. Oh.
[Ross] Spinebuster. Leg is hooked.
-[Lawler] Look out. -[Ross] And three… No, he got a two-count.
-Oh, wait a minute! -[Lawler] Chairs.
-[Ross] Look out! Look out. -[Lawler] Get 'em. What?
[Ross] Edge and Christian trying a Con-Chair-To on The Rattlesnake.
And here come The Acolytes, and there goes the Tag Champions.
[Lawler] Oh, my gosh.
Run away, guys, run away.
Uh-oh, whoa, no. Come back, help Kurt.
[Ross] Austin putting the WWE Champion on the turnbuckle.
[Lawler] Come back.
[Ross] The APA driving Edge and Christian right out of the arena.
[Lawler] This is not good for Kurt. Where are you going, Kurt?
[Ross] Here's a suplex.
Austin got a suplex of his own…
but it took some more out of himself.
And look at the WWE Champion. Now the leg is hook, and we got…
No, we got a long two.
[Lawler] What do you mean, a long two?
See? I told you Austin couldn't beat him.
Kurt Angle kicked out
just like he would've kicked out of that Stunner last week.
-[Ross] Well, you're hallucinating. -[Lawler] I am not.
[Ross] Yeah, you believe that,
and you'll be one of the people on Earth that will.
Austin backing up the WWE Champion in the corner.
-What's Austin…Oh no. -[Lawler] Oh, no.
[Ross] The Game out here,
the man that screwed Austin out of the WWE Title
last Monday night here on Raw.
[Lawler] Austin, you better not provoke him.
[Ross] The Game and Angle… Oh, low blow.
Referee Earl Hebner admonishing verbally The Game.
-[Lawler] He didn't see that, did he? -[Ross] He certainly did not.
[Lawler] What was it? I didn't see it either.
[Ross] A low blow.
Take my word for it.
[crowd chanting]
The Game and Austin cannot have any physical confrontation here tonight,
or they will be out of the Royal Rumble this Sunday.
[Lawler] I'll tell you what, Austin's trying to provoke Triple H now.
[Ross] Gut wrench. He's got it.
-[Lawler] Oh! -The Rattlesnake got it.
[Lawler] That may provoke Triple H right there.
[Ross] Austin, no cover, but right hands right in the temple of Kurt Angle.
[Lawler] You better quit.
You're provoking Triple H, you better not do that, Austin.
[Ross] I can feel how great this Royal Rumble is gonna be Sunday.
[Lawler exclaims]
[Ross] What a suplex. Belly-to-belly overhead suplex.
Austin is down.
-[Lawler] It's deja vu all over again. -[Ross] The champion's got the cover.
No, he doesn't have three.
-Well, The Rattlesnake kicked out. -[Lawler] That's a long two-count.
-[Ross] Another cover. -[Lawler] Count.
[Ross] Austin's right shoulder shooting off the canvas.
[Lawler] The Game's looking like he's getting provoked.
[Ross] Well, he got no business out here anyway.
He can watch this on the monitor.
-He can watch it at home. -[Lawler] Oh!
Oh, man.
[Ross] Man, what a shot by Angle.
He almost beheaded Stone Cold.
[Lawler] Why don't you just admit it, JR? That was very impressive.
-Say it. -[Ross] I just did, damn it.
If you'd listen every now…
[Lawler] You didn't say it was impressive.
Oh, here comes the Olympic Slam. No, wait.
[Ross] Angle looking for the Olympic Slam, but got countered.
[Lawler] Oh, look out.
[Ross] Side Russian leg sweep by Austin.
Got it from the right side.
[Lawler] Where's Austin learning all these wrestling moves? I can't believe it.
[Ross] He's always had them, King, you know that.
Angle hung up to dry.
[Lawler] Oh, look out. Oh, man.
[Ross] Austin put on the brakes.
Angle avoided a contact, luckily for the champion.
They start out… Oh, big right punch, right hands.
A six-man tag has broken down to one-on-one match.
My God, there's no telling where the APA or Tag Champions are.
[Lawler] They're probably out on Wisconsin Street right now,
beating the hell out of Edge and Christian. Missed.
[Ross] Stunner! Austin got the Stunner.
-And the leg is up. -[Lawler] No!
-[bell dinging] -[Ross] Stone Cold!
-Stone Cold has defeated Kurt Angle. -[Lilian] Here are your winners,
The Acolytes and "Stone Cold" Steve Austin.
[Lawler] That may have been a quick count.
[Ross] Kurt Angle did not kick out of the Stone Cold Stunner.
Austin looking a hole right through that son of a… that Triple H.
[Triple H] Hold it right there.
[Lawler] Uh-oh.
Cut the damn music.
-[Lawler] Oh, now what? -[Ross] Yeah, what is this?
What is this?
[Lawler] I feel a provocation.
This is gonna be bad.
Austin, this has been a long time in coming.
Over a year.
And it's been a long year.
I've crippled you.
I put you on the shelf for over a year.
I've made you bleed.
I bent a steel pipe over your head.
And I'm gonna be damn happy to finish it right here and now.
[Lawler] This is gonna be the confrontation we've been worried out.
Somebody's fit to provoke somebody.
[Ross] Somebody's gonna be kicked out of the Rumble
if there's a physical confrontation here.
-[Lawler] Be careful, Triple H. -[Ross] What is he thinking?
[Lawler] You'll lose your WWE Title shot.
-He damn sure will. -Come on, Austin.
I'm gonna give you a fighting chance.
I'm gonna give you the first shot.
[Ross] Triple H is baiting Austin.
-[Lawler] Yeah, go ahead, hit him. -Come on.
-[Lawler] Get kicked out of the Rumble. -[Ross] Austin knows what's at stake.
He'll get kicked out of the Rumble.
Ball your fist up and hit me.
-[Lawler] You gotta do it, Rattlesnake. -[Ross] Don't do it, Austin.
Come on, Austin.
-[Lawler] You can't take that. -[Ross] Don't do it, Austin.
Come on, hit me.
[Ross] Don't be a fool, Stone Cold.
-[Lawler] Hit him, hit him. -What's the matter?
I thought you were a man.
[Lawler] Ooh, ooh, you gotta hit him now.
-Hit him. -[Ross] Oh, man.
-Hit me! -[Lawler] Do it.
[Ross] Austin's gonna explode.
What's the matter, Austin? Are you nothing but a punk?
[Lawler] Yeah, do it.
[Ross] Don't do it. Uh-oh. Don't do it, Stone Cold.
You stand here in front of me and you won't hit me.
What's the matter, Austin?
Does that finger in your face bother you?
Do something about it.
Hit me, Austin.
Come on.
[Ross] Triple H's begging Austin to assault him.
Suck it up one time.
Be The Rattlesnake, be Stone Cold.
[Ross] Triple H wants Austin out of the Rumble.
Hit me, Austin.
-[Lawler] Do it. -[Ross] Don't do it.
-What's the matter? You ever get the sack? -[Lawler] Ah!
I can see the fear in your eyes, Austin.
[Ross] My ass.
I can smell the fear on you. You're scared, aren't you?
You're scared.
Hit me!
[Ross] Don't do it, Stone Cold.
[Lawler] That's it, JR. The Rattlesnake's scared.
He's running, he's scared, he…
-[Ross] Oh, don't do it. -Ah!
-Yeah. -[Ross] Don't do it.
That's it, Austin, grab the chair.
Come on. It doesn't matter if you lose your shot at the Royal Rumble.
It doesn't matter if you lose your chance
at the World Wrestling Entertainment Championship, Austin.
You want me more than life itself.
Rear back on that and hit me, Austin.
[Ross] Don't do it, Stone Cold, don't do it.
Come on, you dumb son of a bitch, hit me.
[Ross] Don't do it. You're gonna walk away tonight.
-[Lawler] What? -[Ross] You're gonna walk away.
Austin wants the title. Austin wants to go to the Rumble.
Yeah, just what I thought, Austin.
Leave.
You're a coward.
I can see the yellow stripe up your back.
I can see your knees shaking.
BMF.
Austin, you are nothing but a great big pussy!
[all exclaiming]
[Ross] Oh, man.
Triple H is baiting Austin.
He's demanding Austin to assault him.
Triple H does not want… Here comes Austin.
Here comes The Rattlesnake.
-[Lawler] He's gonna provoke Triple H. -[Ross] God almighty, don't do it.
-[Lawler] I wouldn't do that… -[Ross] Kurt Angle.
-[Lawler] What? -Angle with the Olympic Slam.
[Lawler] What was that all about, Kurt? What are you… What?
Whoa.
[Ross] Austin with the Stunner.
["Glass Shatters" plays]
Kurt Angle's got the Slam on The Game.
And Austin said, "To hell with both of you."
[Lawler] Look at him.
Triple H is laying down, Kurt Angle is laying down.
[Ross] Stone Cold is going to New Orleans.
Stone Cold one of the 30 men in the Royal Rumble.
[Lawler] Oh, my God. What's gonna happen Sunday, JR?
[Ross] Only one man can win the Royal Rumble.
Will it be "Stone Cold" Steve Austin?
[Lawler] But what about Triple H and Kurt Angle Sunday?
[Ross] For the WWE Title at Royal Rumble, the extravaganza pay-per-view.