WEBVTT

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-To Cauca?
-Mm-hmm.

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-They left this morning.
-What for?

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Mm, well, they both wanted to go.

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Eva's working on something
about Indigenous oral tradition, and…

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and Pabón was interested
because of his theater thing.

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-He thought it'd be smart to go.
-Don't you do schoolwork together?

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This one's a little different.
It's a free essay. Choose your subject.

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Oh. What subject did you choose?

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Mm. It's about identity.

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Oh, identity.
Well, that could be interesting.

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-You don't know who you are? Are you lost?
-Oh, come on, Dad. No.

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So I'm gonna write about…
Or, well, I want to.

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I want to interview a Colombian wrestler

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who has never
taken off his mask in public.

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-He calls himself "The Colombian Leopard."
-Mm!

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-Do you know him? Good?
-Of course.

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You know, after football,
my real passion at your age was wrestling.

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-Oh, really?
-Yeah. But I had to stop going to matches.

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-Your mom didn't approve.
-No. Too much violence.

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I was a big fan of this guy,
the Tiger of Colombia.

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He was good. And that Leopard,
he was pretty great. Really crafty.

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Oh, wow. All right. Very interesting.
I'll let you know if I need help.

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Sure, son. I'd be happy
to help however I can.

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-Thanks.
-Hey, so Eva and Pabón…

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…they're not riding a motorcycle
to Cauca, are they?

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-Oh, wow.
-Yeah, they did. Why?

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I don't like it. Super dangerous.

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Have you seen
how people drive on the roads here?

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Hmm.

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I have to admit
that my mom's words reminded me a lot

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of what Luisa said.

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After that, I started to feel a creeping
sense of anxiety that would stick with me

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for the short time
I was separated from Eva.

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We took that motorcycle
all the way to the coast…

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-Mm.
-…out to Cartagena.

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-That trip was incredible.
-Who'd you go with, by the way?

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-I went with Alfredo.
-No.

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-Yes.
-No way.

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-I went with Alfredo.
-Oh no.

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Yeah. Thing is,
we'd both just made a huge mistake.

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The only thing we could think to do
was head to the coast on a motorcycle

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and hide out with some friends.

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What happened?

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-They found us.
-Mm!

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And they took us right to Bogotá.

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As a punishment,
my dad decided it was a good idea

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to send me to José María.

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That's how I found you guys.
Then I was happier than ever.

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It's sort of incredible how

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our parents' greatest mistakes
end up doing us a favor.

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Like when my dad found out about me,
a similar thing happened, actually.

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A sense of freedom.

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I just felt… liberated when he left.

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And did you ever hear from him again?

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My mom told me he's living
with another woman in a small town.

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And that small town is near here.

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So the other reason

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I wanted to come out here was so I would

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be able to face him, and be honest,

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and say everything I wanted to
back when he was around.

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EVA LASTING

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"THE THEATRE AND ITS DOUBLE"
"EPISODE 6"

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Coming.

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Dad?

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Yeah, all right. Hang on. I'm coming, man.

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What's up? Hi, son.

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-Hey.
-So I was doing some research.

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What I heard is,

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the guy hangs out at a bar downtown
called The Red Lightbulb.

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-Got that?
-What? I don't understand.

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-Who… who are you talking about?
-Come on. You know who.

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The Leopard.

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-The Colombian Leopard?
-Yeah!

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-You got info?
-I'm a cab driver.

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I have the soul of an investigator.

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-You know what my contact said?
-What?

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That the Leopard is going through
a bit of a rough patch.

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-Oh, why?
-Don't know.

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But my contact says
the Leopard goes to the bar,

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sits down at the counter,
won't talk to anyone,

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gets hammered alone, then heads out.

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Oh, my contact said he was known
for being a very friendly person,

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which has to mean
he's going through something.

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-Okay, so what…
-So I've got good news and bad news.

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The good, we know where he's going.
The bad, no one knows when.

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-What do we do? Hmm?
-Well, I don't know. I guess--

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What do you mean, you guess?
Hey, you know the saying.

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"If you want something in life,
you have to…"

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-Uh… go find it at the bar, I guess?
-Exactly!

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So let's go to The Red Lightbulb.

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-The Red Lightbulb? Right now?
-Yes!

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And you're going with me?

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-Of course. Let's go.
-All right, then.

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-My purse. I've been robbed. I…
-Your what?

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-They took the purse.
-The purse is right here.

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-Oh, okay.
-Shoot. The keys.

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Why are you so quiet, son?

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I don't know.

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Worried about Eva,
because of what mom said earlier.

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The driving and motorcycles
being so dangerous.

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Don't lose sleep over it.
Mom can get really paranoid.

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-I know.
-Mm-hmm.

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Guess I should have gone, right? Well…

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Why didn't you?

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I'm a moron.

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I mean, I wanted her to invite me,
to say something, but… pff!

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-Mm-hmm?
-No.

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Want my opinion, son?

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-No, well--
-No, it's fine that you let her go.

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Spend all your time together,
you'll think of her like gum.

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She'll start to lose flavor.

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After a while, you'll be looking for
a way to get rid of her.

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No, you have to go off
and do your own things

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so you can come home and keep it fresh.

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You'll have all these new stories.

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Take me, for instance.

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Thanks to the taxi, I've spent like…
like 20 years with your mom,

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'cause… I experience new stuff every day
that I can share with her.

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-Mm.
-That's why we're still together.

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-Mm.
-Well, that and because…

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I let your mom have space.
I had to learn that the hard way.

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She had to live her own life
so she could come home

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and, hopefully, share those experiences
and strengthen our connection.

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The thing that really kills couples,
Camilo, is silence.

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When there's no conversation, no exchange.

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Hmm?

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What my dad said in the car made me think.

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And although it didn't make
my concern for Eva disappear,

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it did free me from guilt.

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And allowing her that freedom
felt like an act of love.

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No problem.

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At The Red Lightbulb,
we didn't find The Leopard,

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but we did find out some information
that brought us closer to him.

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Sorry.

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In the '80s,
making a movie in Colombia was tough.

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You had to be scrappy and resourceful.

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But there were stubborn people
with strong visions,

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like Lisandro Duque and Ramiro Meléndez,

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who put their faith
in stories about athletes.

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The first one was called
The Bicycle Racer.

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It was about a cyclist.

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The second was a boxing movie
called The Last Round.

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Turned out, there was a third film
about a wrestler, The Leopard,

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which we learned about
at The Red Lightbulb.

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So someone told you
The Leopard just jumped ship

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in the middle of shooting the movie?

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Well, yeah, I guess that's the rumor.

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-Well, that's all it is.
-Mm.

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-So he didn't quit?
-No, course not. He wouldn't do that.

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The Leopard had a reputation
for being serious and very responsible.

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-So what happened?
-Well, the movie was shut down.

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Oh, really? Why?

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We ran out of money.

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We tried, but we just couldn't
convince any investors

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to throw more cash at the project.

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It was a bummer.

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Fact is, The Leopard's not really
what he used to be.

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Everyone's forgetting about him now.

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Don't worry. We won't.

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Any idea where he might be right now?

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Well, the man's always been
very predictable.

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Huh.

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I already found out
where he spends his time.

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Let's see. Ten. Oh! Whoa! Whoa!
Man, where was that hiding?

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Oh, damn, that's good stuff.
See? The drunker I get, the better I play.

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Maybe I should give the young guy
a chance, though.

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How are you doing there, Henry?

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Afternoon, guys.

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-How's it going?
-What's going on?

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Hey, so why'd you come by, huh?

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I've been looking for you.

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You're not gonna introduce me
to your buddies?

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This is my son. Uh… he's my oldest.

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Uh… and his girlfriend.

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-Nice to meet you.
-No! Oh my God, no.

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Eva's not my girlfriend. Did you forget
that your son's a big faggot?

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Remember? I love men.

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-Boy, do I.
-Oh, brother. Kids these days, right?

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-Come on. Let's have a talk.
-No, don't worry.

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-I don't wanna take up your time.
-I'm happy to--

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No, look. I came here to say thanks, Dad.

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Your son is here… to say "thanks a lot."

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Because you made me realize
that I don't wanna repeat the patterns

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of a guy as backward
and emotionally underdeveloped as you.

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And your humiliations,

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abuse, and all the bullshit
you put us through

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was necessary to form my true identity.

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Of course, now, fortunately,

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I have people that love me.

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And that love is boundless.

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I can be completely and totally myself,
as gay as I am.

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By the way, I'm also here to say

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I forgive you, Dad.

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And I hope that, at some point,

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you fill up your empty heart with love
and find a new direction for your life.

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I really hope that.

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Come on.

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Enjoy your game, you guys.
Have a good day.

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-Thank you.
-Take it easy.

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-You too.
-Enjoy.

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How do you feel?

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Pretty good.

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Fine. Fine.

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I feel… lighter.

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It took me a long time to…

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to find the courage
to be able to… to move on

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and completely erase him from my life.

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And now that I said… my truth,
right to his face, I feel really…

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-…healed.
-Mm-hmm.

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That's the healing power
of voicing your feelings.

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When you… you express
your emotional issues by verbalizing them,

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you feel better.

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That's the principle behind everything,

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from Catholic confession
to psychoanalysis.

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Sounds pretty similar to theater too.

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Yeah. That's right.

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I'm really happy for you, Gustavo.

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Thanks.

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I would give anything in the world
to be… to be able to tell my mom

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some of the stuff
I kept to myself as a kid.

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Hmm.

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Thank you so much.

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Of course. That's what friends are for.

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-No.
-No?

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No.

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You're definitely not my friend, Eva.

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You're my family.

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-Love you to the moon and back.
-You too.

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Thanks for being here for me.

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Mm.

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Wanna go?

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Yep, let's do it.

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But we should make our way to a phone
so we can tell everyone we're okay.

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Sounds good.

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They had no information?

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Yes. Yeah, yeah.
No, I… I understand. Yeah, right.

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We have to be on the lookout.
They might call us back.

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Okay, sounds good.

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All right. Thanks.
I'll speak to you later.

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-Dad.
-Appreciate it, honey.

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No, no, no, really.
Thank you very much. Take care.

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-Poor thing. She's got a lot of problems.
-Yeah, I bet.

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Yeah. What'd they say, son?

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They told me to call the 364.
It's all right.

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See? What'd I tell you, huh?

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-How about we have a few drinks?
-No.

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What if The Leopard shows up here later
and can't find us? Huh?

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-But Eva said she'd call tonight.
-A couple of beers. We deserve them.

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Fine. I'll buy you a drink.

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'Cause I feel sorry for you.
You're stuck in the cab eight hours a day.

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-Hello there. What can I get you?
-Two cold ones, my friend.

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Coming right up.

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-You don't have to work later, right?
-No. God, no. Don't worry about that.

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Can I confess something to calm you down?

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I feel guilty for not helping you
with your homework

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when you were in elementary school.

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-You didn't help in high school.
-That was always up to your mother.

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-Remember that?
-Yeah, I remember. Of course.

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I was a bad student.
I wasn't built for it. I hated books.

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I've always been a man of action,
you know?

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With this university thing,

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I feel like I'm paying a debt
I owe to myself and to you.

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-So, Camilo, salud!
-Salud!

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-To the opportunities that life gives us.
-Thanks, Pop.

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-Whoo!
-Whoo! Whoo!

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Oh my God.

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This is incredible.

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I was only five years old or so.

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But, well…

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I remember everything so clearly
that it actually kind of freaks me out.

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Mm.

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My mom had just returned home,
'cause some guy, um…

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well, he left her on her own.

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And my prick of a father only let her
come home so he could humiliate her.

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Because she wanted to be with me,

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she put up with the situation
for a few days.

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She tried to go back
to being a painter again.

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She really loved it.

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She was very good too.

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But… then, one morning,
she came into my room.

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She was crying.

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She kissed me on my forehead

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and left me with a new book.

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It was a book about Frida's paintings.

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Then I looked out the window in my room,

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and I… saw her leaving the house
with all her bags.

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Next day, I found out…

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I found out that she was dead.
My mother had shot herself in the head.

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They didn't even take me to the cemetery,
so I never got a chance to say goodbye.

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I mean, my dad was determined
to convince me I never had a mom,

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but… …it was useless.

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Because, um…

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because there isn't a day
I stop thinking about her.

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And what is it you wanna share with her?

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My heart.

14:48.053 --> 14:50.014
Relieved of my worries about Eva,

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thanks to the call
they had made to the 364,

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I knew I couldn't give up
further exploring the subject of my essay.

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I was going to leave no stone unturned.

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So he hasn't been back here since then?

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Well, no. No one's seen him around.

15:01.483 --> 15:04.403
They had to take him off the posters
advertising the fights this month.

15:04.486 --> 15:07.698
So they're not putting him in matches?
But the guy's a big name, right?

15:07.781 --> 15:10.034
Well, now we've got
a handful of up-and-comers.

15:10.117 --> 15:11.118
These two are popular.

15:11.201 --> 15:13.329
And people pay good money
to see these guys.

15:13.913 --> 15:15.956
And that's what The Leopard
doesn't understand.

15:16.040 --> 15:18.417
I heard that they offered him
a hell of a pretty penny

15:18.500 --> 15:20.127
for a… an exhibition.

15:20.210 --> 15:21.462
Mask versus mask, you know?

15:21.545 --> 15:23.714
But on the condition that,
if the Leopard lost,

15:23.797 --> 15:25.799
he'd take off his mask
in front of the audience.

15:25.883 --> 15:27.926
-He didn't want to?
-I mean, look, the guy's brave.

15:28.010 --> 15:31.305
-He's not stupid. He wouldn't do it.
-Know where we can find him these days?

15:31.388 --> 15:33.933
No, but I've heard that
he's always spending time at this bar.

15:34.016 --> 15:37.394
The Red Lightbulb.
He's a big beer drinker, apparently.

15:37.478 --> 15:39.897
-Got it.
-Okay, well, thanks. Thank you very much.

15:39.980 --> 15:42.274
That's it?
I was hoping for a little reward.

15:43.025 --> 15:45.277
-Uh, thank you very much.
-It's all right, son.

15:45.778 --> 15:48.530
Don't worry. We're in the ballpark.
That was good progress.

15:48.614 --> 15:50.991
-No one knows where the guy's gonna be.
-We left breadcrumbs.

15:51.075 --> 15:52.368
He knows we're looking for him.

15:52.451 --> 15:53.494
-And?
-And what?

15:53.577 --> 15:56.205
With someone like The Leopard,
it's better not to go looking for him.

15:56.288 --> 15:57.873
You want him to look for you.

15:57.957 --> 16:00.334
Back at The Lightbulb,
I decided to plant a little lie.

16:00.417 --> 16:02.127
I said you're a very prominent reporter.

16:02.211 --> 16:03.712
-What? No.
-You're on your way.

16:03.796 --> 16:05.589
You'll be famous. I got ahead of myself.

16:05.673 --> 16:08.425
I said you were looking to put him
on some kind of TV show.

16:08.509 --> 16:10.803
If these people are right
about The Leopard being desperate,

16:10.886 --> 16:12.471
he'll take the bait right away.

16:13.055 --> 16:15.474
-Well, let's get back to the bar, then.
-Yeah.

16:15.557 --> 16:18.310
Remember, "More flies
are caught with honey…"

16:19.186 --> 16:20.688
-"…than vinegar."
-Than vinegar. Right.

16:22.398 --> 16:23.857
Let's go.

16:26.944 --> 16:28.112
Hey. Thank you.

16:35.619 --> 16:37.788
-What can I get you?
-Two cold ones. Thanks.

16:37.871 --> 16:38.997
You got it.

16:39.081 --> 16:40.749
Oh, a guy left this earlier.

16:40.833 --> 16:41.834
For me? A guy?

16:41.917 --> 16:43.794
Yeah, he came in a while ago.

16:43.877 --> 16:46.714
He said to give this
to the man asking about The Leopard.

16:46.797 --> 16:48.966
Yesterday, you told me
a journalist was looking for him.

16:49.049 --> 16:50.175
Maybe that's who it's for.

16:50.259 --> 16:52.136
Hello?

16:52.970 --> 16:56.223
I don't know about this.
Dad, there's no one here.

16:56.932 --> 16:59.143
-Maybe… maybe we should go.
-Uh, Leopard?

16:59.810 --> 17:01.311
-I can't see a thing.
-Hello, sir?

17:01.395 --> 17:02.938
-Let's go. It's empty.
-Where are you?

17:03.021 --> 17:04.773
Come on. I'm done, Dad.
Let's get outta here!

17:04.857 --> 17:05.983
Here I am.

17:08.819 --> 17:10.487
What do you want from me?

17:12.281 --> 17:13.657
No, you look way too young

17:13.741 --> 17:16.034
to be one of the most prominent reporters
in Colombia.

17:16.118 --> 17:16.952
So, no.

17:17.036 --> 17:20.205
But, uh… uh, Mr. Leopard,
trust me, sir, he will be, one day.

17:20.289 --> 17:23.917
You know, I've broken peoples' necks
and severed their spinal columns

17:24.001 --> 17:25.586
for much less than this.

17:25.669 --> 17:27.129
No, but… Look, no.

17:27.212 --> 17:29.548
No, you… you don't have to…
I'm sorry. I can explain.

17:29.631 --> 17:31.967
The thing is, I study literature, okay?

17:32.051 --> 17:36.472
And… and for this writing assignment,
I had to pick a character and a topic.

17:36.555 --> 17:38.182
And I chose you, and…

17:38.265 --> 17:40.809
and for the topic I picked… identity.

17:40.893 --> 17:42.561
Because of the… the mask. Yeah.

17:42.644 --> 17:45.147
For context, Mr. Leopard,
he's number one in his class.

17:45.230 --> 17:46.398
He's the best.

17:46.482 --> 17:49.359
So you guys have been looking for me
like a couple of lunatics

17:49.443 --> 17:51.445
just for a college assignment?

17:53.822 --> 17:54.782
-Yes. Yeah.
-No.

17:54.865 --> 17:56.283
-No?
-Yes.

17:56.366 --> 17:58.494
Pretty much. More or less.
I also work for a newspaper.

17:58.577 --> 18:00.079
-I do the literary periodical.
-Right.

18:00.162 --> 18:01.163
So apart from the essay,

18:01.246 --> 18:04.208
I was hoping to put together
a nice piece for the paper.

18:04.291 --> 18:06.251
They might publish it, Mr. Leopard.

18:06.335 --> 18:07.461
Or "Don Leopard."

18:07.544 --> 18:08.879
Or "His Leopardship"?

18:08.962 --> 18:10.130
-Or "Leo"?
-Or "Pardo"?

18:10.214 --> 18:11.381
-Or--
-No, no.

18:11.465 --> 18:12.925
Uh, well, "Leopard" is… That's fine.

18:13.634 --> 18:16.303
I started when I was very young,
back in the mid '40s.

18:16.386 --> 18:17.638
Those were the days.

18:17.721 --> 18:19.640
I was raw, at first.

18:19.723 --> 18:22.643
But I realized, over time,
that lots of folks liked my style a lot,

18:22.726 --> 18:24.978
so I became more… technical.

18:25.062 --> 18:28.607
And that's how I won everything
a wrestler can win.

18:29.316 --> 18:31.193
You've never taken off your mask.
Is that right?

18:31.276 --> 18:33.570
Yes, that's right. Uh… never.

18:33.654 --> 18:35.739
Like the famous El Santo.
I will never remove this.

18:35.823 --> 18:38.200
-Neither will anyone else.
-That's what I told him. Right?

18:38.283 --> 18:40.410
-And why exactly?
-What do you mean?

18:40.494 --> 18:42.079
-He won't do it--
-Dad, let him answer.

18:42.162 --> 18:43.580
Go ahead, Leopard.

18:43.664 --> 18:45.457
It's pretty obvious, right?

18:45.541 --> 18:48.377
Because, now,
I wanna keep things low-key in my life.

18:48.460 --> 18:52.214
The fame and…
all the adoring fans can be great,

18:52.297 --> 18:53.173
but…

18:54.341 --> 18:57.386
they bring… serious problems sometimes.

18:57.469 --> 18:58.804
And it's a shame.

18:58.887 --> 19:02.349
It's a shame that television
has disregarded wrestling.

19:02.850 --> 19:04.935
At the moment, there's nowhere to find

19:05.018 --> 19:07.354
the tremendous matches
that I was part of over the years.

19:07.437 --> 19:09.898
-I took on the Tiger of Colombia…
-Yes.

19:09.982 --> 19:11.149
-…The Silver Fox…
-Of course.

19:11.233 --> 19:12.943
…the Ecuadorian Banshee.

19:13.026 --> 19:16.113
All of those were brilliant matches!
Spectacular!

19:16.196 --> 19:18.365
I can attest to that. It's true.

19:18.866 --> 19:20.617
And now…

19:20.701 --> 19:22.786
…those thrilling fights only live on

19:23.745 --> 19:26.123
in the recollections
of those who were actually there.

19:26.206 --> 19:27.040
Mm-hmm.

19:27.124 --> 19:30.419
But, like all memories, in time,
they slowly start to lose clarity

19:30.502 --> 19:32.045
and fade away

19:33.046 --> 19:34.590
until they disappear.

19:38.010 --> 19:40.762
You thought about retirement?
It might be a good time for it.

19:41.930 --> 19:43.265
Yeah.

19:43.348 --> 19:45.809
I've thought about it a lot, actually.
Plenty of times.

19:45.893 --> 19:47.811
-You're still in one piece.
-Yeah, that's true.

19:47.895 --> 19:49.313
-Right.
-Still intact.

19:49.813 --> 19:52.357
In fact, I feel like
I have so much to give.

19:52.441 --> 19:54.151
I may be old, but I feel young.

19:54.234 --> 19:55.777
I guarantee, if you put me in this ring,

19:55.861 --> 19:57.905
I'll be able to take down
any opponent you think of.

19:57.988 --> 19:59.489
That's right. That's the attitude.

19:59.573 --> 20:02.034
Well, one source suggested
that… that you disappeared

20:02.117 --> 20:05.245
because you didn't wanna face
a young wrestler, some 20-year-old kid.

20:05.329 --> 20:06.622
That's what they said?

20:06.705 --> 20:08.373
-Yeah.
-No.

20:08.457 --> 20:10.626
That asshole learned
everything he knows from me.

20:10.709 --> 20:12.044
I could beat him in my sleep.

20:12.127 --> 20:14.379
All right, so why not
accept the match, then,

20:14.463 --> 20:16.298
and show everybody
that you're still a winner?

20:16.381 --> 20:19.676
'Cause they wanna give that little shit
top billing over me. Come on.

20:19.760 --> 20:22.804
Over me! You're looking at a legend.
I've been doing this over 25 years.

20:22.888 --> 20:25.015
That's completely…
That's so unfair. So unfair.

20:25.098 --> 20:26.183
I'll tell you what.

20:26.266 --> 20:30.437
If I let them use my name that way,
"Leopard," but in the second spot,

20:30.520 --> 20:33.315
I'll be opening up the door
for them to program me in fights

20:33.398 --> 20:34.942
that aren't even the main event.

20:35.025 --> 20:36.652
And that'll make it much harder

20:36.735 --> 20:39.238
to return to my glory days
when I was on top.

20:39.321 --> 20:41.990
You know what's ironic is I spent my life

20:42.074 --> 20:45.786
facing all kinds of wrestlers,
and, no matter the odds, I always won out.

20:45.869 --> 20:48.372
-Hmm.
-But now I don't know what to do.

20:48.455 --> 20:54.169
'Cause I'm facing a whole new enemy
which is silent… invisible.

20:56.004 --> 20:57.297
It's called "obscurity."

20:58.173 --> 20:59.049
You're afraid?

20:59.132 --> 21:02.302
Well, becoming obscure
is like dying while you're still alive.

21:02.386 --> 21:04.554
My dream was to pass away

21:05.055 --> 21:08.100
and let the reputation of The Leopard
survive forever.

21:08.183 --> 21:11.937
And that… is my passport to immortality.

21:12.020 --> 21:14.648
And why's it important
to achieve immortality?

21:14.731 --> 21:17.901
'Cause that's how you defeat death.
It's the only way you can.

21:17.985 --> 21:21.154
I have to win. I have to defeat it.
I'm a fighter. That's what I do.

21:21.238 --> 21:24.157
It was hard to see
that idol of the '60s and '70s

21:24.241 --> 21:27.077
one step away
from depression and irrelevance.

21:27.160 --> 21:27.995
Would you show us…

21:28.078 --> 21:31.498
He embodied the downfall of celebrity,
the twilight of the gods.

21:31.581 --> 21:33.041
His life was irrefutable proof

21:33.125 --> 21:35.794
that fame is as fleeting
and circumstantial as vapor,

21:35.877 --> 21:39.756
and that, when it abandons its vessel,
all that's left is an unfillable void.

21:39.840 --> 21:43.468
It also happened to exemplify
Nietzsche's idea about loneliness

21:43.552 --> 21:48.015
as a punishment for those who move away
from the masses in search of immortality.

21:51.935 --> 21:54.312
And while The Leopard
was telling me his story,

21:54.396 --> 21:56.523
Eva and Pabón were invited to the ceremony

21:56.606 --> 21:59.318
which had brought them to Cauca
to begin with.

21:59.401 --> 22:03.488
After a long journey, it seemed
everything was falling into place,

22:03.572 --> 22:05.699
and they were about to
experience revelations

22:05.782 --> 22:07.451
that would open their minds forever.

22:28.347 --> 22:29.890
You're here already.

22:30.390 --> 22:33.185
-Why did you come?
-To look for Master Artaud.

22:35.228 --> 22:36.146
What for?

22:36.229 --> 22:38.940
There are a lot of things
he wrote that I don't understand.

22:39.024 --> 22:42.903
What is written is written,
and it has no explanation.

22:43.403 --> 22:47.824
The only thing that is understood
is the incomprehensible.

22:47.908 --> 22:49.368
Like you.

22:49.451 --> 22:53.121
You are looking for the truth
in the wrong place.

22:53.205 --> 22:56.124
The truth is in the fire,

22:56.208 --> 22:57.709
in your hands.

22:57.793 --> 22:59.127
Look at the night.

22:59.211 --> 23:00.879
Look at the fire.

23:01.463 --> 23:04.591
Look at your reflection in the water.

23:04.674 --> 23:07.094
There, you will find what you need.

23:07.177 --> 23:09.137
Kindness and cruelty.

23:09.221 --> 23:11.932
Cruelty sometimes tells the truth.

23:12.015 --> 23:15.352
You told the truth and killed your father.

23:15.435 --> 23:17.312
Running away is weak.

23:17.396 --> 23:19.439
Running away is for cowards,

23:19.523 --> 23:24.820
and your world needs brave visionaries
to change it.

23:25.320 --> 23:28.698
And he lost the son he thought you were.

23:28.782 --> 23:32.577
But the kindness is
that the one you really are,

23:32.661 --> 23:35.789
the one who exists, was born.

23:35.872 --> 23:36.873
You see?

23:36.957 --> 23:38.291
The truth is cruel.

23:38.375 --> 23:40.544
Cry. That's it. Cry.

23:40.627 --> 23:42.379
Then you will laugh.

23:42.462 --> 23:46.591
That's what theater, your theater is like.

23:46.675 --> 23:48.510
Search! Search!

23:48.593 --> 23:51.972
Theater is in kindness and cruelty.

23:58.895 --> 24:00.230
Eva?

24:16.163 --> 24:17.164
Mama?

24:20.125 --> 24:21.293
Do you like it?

24:26.798 --> 24:29.426
Yes. It looks like
one of Frida's paintings.

24:31.553 --> 24:35.307
I painted it because I know you're doing
a project about her at school, honey.

24:36.933 --> 24:39.352
It's called Frida Waiting for Diego.

24:40.520 --> 24:42.022
I never liked him.

24:43.106 --> 24:45.317
You know that man didn't respect her.

24:47.194 --> 24:49.696
Diego was sleeping with her sister
behind her back.

24:51.698 --> 24:54.993
Well, at his core… he was an artist.

24:57.037 --> 24:59.372
Did that entitle him to abuse her?

24:59.998 --> 25:01.666
It was a two-way street.

25:01.750 --> 25:04.711
Remember, Frida wasn't exactly a saint.

25:05.337 --> 25:08.882
There are the stories about her
with Chavela, with Trotsky, with Muray,

25:08.965 --> 25:11.676
with Lamba, and lots of other famous men
who passed through her bed.

25:12.552 --> 25:15.931
They never believed in exclusivity
like a traditional couple.

25:16.014 --> 25:17.641
They were above bourgeois morality.

25:18.642 --> 25:21.269
Her story with Diego
produced her finest work.

25:21.770 --> 25:24.648
All that intensity and passion and pain.

25:24.731 --> 25:26.024
What about you?

25:26.566 --> 25:29.194
I mean, why did you marry
a man like my father?

25:29.277 --> 25:31.613
And why did you have a daughter with him?

25:33.281 --> 25:34.449
Because, um…

25:35.992 --> 25:39.829
I needed a source of meaning in my life
outside of my own ambitions.

25:40.539 --> 25:43.416
Eventually, that desire
became very urgent.

25:44.251 --> 25:46.544
And that urgent desire needed a father.

25:54.844 --> 25:56.221
You were like a…

25:57.264 --> 25:59.891
a wonderful dream
that happened to come true.

25:59.975 --> 26:02.686
And for the little time I got to hold you,
I was so happy.

26:03.270 --> 26:05.105
Oh.

26:06.815 --> 26:09.067
A wonderful dream becoming a reality.

26:10.610 --> 26:12.362
I think you're going to be born, Eva.

26:15.782 --> 26:18.285
You wanted a goal other than yourself.

26:20.495 --> 26:25.667
But… why did Frida insist on
being a mother after two abortions?

26:27.252 --> 26:30.046
Probably because painting
was no longer enough.

26:30.964 --> 26:33.258
And she wanted to win at least one battle

26:33.341 --> 26:36.428
against her own destroyed
and defeated body.

26:37.095 --> 26:38.972
And so she tried.

26:39.764 --> 26:42.267
Tried to bring a life into the world.

26:43.268 --> 26:46.021
She wanted a living,
breathing work of art.

26:46.605 --> 26:50.108
And she wanted to conceive it
with the man who was her soulmate.

26:51.776 --> 26:52.944
Maybe…

26:54.279 --> 26:56.531
maybe someday you'll find a reason

26:57.657 --> 26:59.034
to be a mother.

27:04.956 --> 27:08.585
Aren't you
the most beautiful thing in the world?

27:12.505 --> 27:14.174
I was pregnant before, you know.

27:15.008 --> 27:16.134
I know that.

27:17.761 --> 27:18.637
But…

27:19.888 --> 27:21.723
I didn't want to have the baby.

27:24.100 --> 27:26.478
I didn't feel prepared to be a mother.

27:27.103 --> 27:29.564
Not to mention
that you had no reason to be one either.

27:30.982 --> 27:34.361
Honestly, sometimes I wonder
if needing a reason is a bad excuse.

27:35.695 --> 27:38.281
I overthink everything. It's exhausting.

27:38.865 --> 27:41.534
Well, it's true.
Sometimes your impulse is good.

27:42.494 --> 27:44.496
But if you're making the choice
to be a new mother,

27:44.579 --> 27:45.955
you better have a reason.

27:46.998 --> 27:47.832
Why?

27:48.333 --> 27:50.210
Because I felt worn out.

27:52.170 --> 27:54.631
And my reason to live just vanished.

27:54.714 --> 27:56.383
Wasn't I reason enough?

27:58.635 --> 28:00.678
I was the meaning
that you had been waiting for.

28:00.762 --> 28:02.222
It doesn't work like that.

28:04.224 --> 28:05.725
You were my joy.

28:06.309 --> 28:08.937
And because of you,
because you made me so happy,

28:09.938 --> 28:12.691
I had to put this off
for as long as I possibly could.

28:13.692 --> 28:17.070
But now I'm dry,
and even my heart's completely empty.

28:18.780 --> 28:22.409
And I don't want you to have to
carry the weight of my despair.

28:23.410 --> 28:25.495
Didn't you know that I would miss you?

28:26.663 --> 28:29.541
That not having you
would make my life harder?

28:30.208 --> 28:32.711
I thought about that all the time.

28:32.794 --> 28:35.922
But it's better
that you suffered a single blow

28:36.548 --> 28:39.592
than to have to witness
a slow decline into pain and agony.

28:41.177 --> 28:43.596
I grew up feeling so lonely.

28:45.014 --> 28:47.267
There was a big hole inside me
I couldn't fill.

28:54.482 --> 28:57.026
But you won that battle, Eva.

28:58.361 --> 28:59.487
Look at you.

29:00.363 --> 29:02.115
You're an incredible woman.

29:02.699 --> 29:05.744
Beautiful. Self-possessed.

29:06.786 --> 29:10.665
It's paradoxical,
because you would make a great mom.

29:12.459 --> 29:14.502
I admire you so much, honey.

29:15.670 --> 29:16.754
You too.

29:21.050 --> 29:22.385
It's time, sweetheart.

29:35.064 --> 29:36.274
Go in peace.

29:38.985 --> 29:41.029
Don't worry. I'll be fine. I promise.

29:43.573 --> 29:45.325
Don't forget me, Eva.

29:48.453 --> 29:49.496
Never.

30:13.061 --> 30:15.355
It was an intense day for everyone.

30:15.438 --> 30:17.857
A pivotal time
that stirred deep things in us

30:17.941 --> 30:20.485
and, somehow, changed our perspectives.

30:20.568 --> 30:24.197
In the desert
You can remember your name

30:24.280 --> 30:28.576
'Cause there ain't no one
For to give you no pain

30:28.660 --> 30:31.955
La, la, la, la, la, la

30:32.038 --> 30:35.166
La, la, la, la, la

30:36.584 --> 30:39.712
La, la, la, la, la, la

30:39.796 --> 30:42.674
La, la, la, la, la

30:43.675 --> 30:47.720
After two days in the desert sun

30:47.804 --> 30:50.890
My skin began to turn red

30:51.391 --> 30:54.852
After three days in the desert fun

30:54.936 --> 30:58.356
I was looking at a riverbed

30:58.857 --> 31:01.067
And the story it told

31:01.150 --> 31:03.111
Of a river that flowed…

31:03.194 --> 31:04.696
-How are you doing?
-Hey.

31:04.779 --> 31:06.781
…to think it was dead

31:06.865 --> 31:10.743
You see, I've been through the desert
On a horse with no name

31:10.827 --> 31:14.205
It felt good to be out of the rain

31:14.706 --> 31:18.501
In the desert
You can remember your name

31:18.585 --> 31:22.589
'Cause there ain't no one
For to give you no pain

31:22.672 --> 31:25.216
La, la, la, la, la…

31:26.676 --> 31:28.845
Wow. Incredible.

31:28.928 --> 31:29.846
Yeah.

31:30.346 --> 31:33.349
Seeing Gustavo talk to his dad
stirred up a few memories.

31:33.433 --> 31:34.309
I guess it was…

31:34.809 --> 31:38.104
I mean, just the fact
that he confronted him made me…

31:38.187 --> 31:41.232
It brought up baggage about my mom
I didn't know I had.

31:41.983 --> 31:44.444
-Mm.
-And then, while I was tripping…

31:45.653 --> 31:47.238
I talked to her.

31:47.322 --> 31:48.406
Mm. And?

31:48.907 --> 31:49.741
How was it?

31:50.241 --> 31:51.868
It was weird.

31:51.951 --> 31:54.579
But… it was incredible.

31:54.662 --> 31:59.125
We spoke about the things that…
we couldn't have talked about before.

31:59.959 --> 32:03.755
It put things in perspective,
and I think it filled up the void.

32:04.380 --> 32:05.423
Hmm.

32:08.092 --> 32:09.302
And how are you feeling?

32:11.471 --> 32:12.388
Fine.

32:13.097 --> 32:14.599
At least for now.

32:15.475 --> 32:17.101
It was really hard.

32:17.185 --> 32:19.103
But it was very powerful too.

32:19.937 --> 32:23.107
Like I appreciated her woman-to-woman,

32:23.191 --> 32:24.317
if that makes sense.

32:24.400 --> 32:25.401
Mm-hmm.

32:27.779 --> 32:30.281
So what are you gonna do for the essay?

32:31.366 --> 32:33.368
Well, so this is gonna sound pretty weird,

32:33.451 --> 32:35.828
but, um, I talked to my mom,
and… I don't know.

32:35.912 --> 32:39.582
I feel I know more about the real Frida
than I ever did before, and…

32:39.666 --> 32:41.834
and she knew I was writing the essay too.

32:41.918 --> 32:44.128
It's like she was helping me
with my homework.

32:44.212 --> 32:45.129
Mm.

32:46.047 --> 32:48.132
This might sound kinda weird too, but…

32:49.008 --> 32:50.927
I got a bunch of help
from my dad on the essay.

32:51.511 --> 32:53.763
-Guess both our parents pitched in. Yeah.
-Really?

32:53.846 --> 32:58.101
He was the one who found
all this information that I didn't have.

32:58.601 --> 33:02.355
Plus, he, um… he's the reason
we actually met The Leopard.

33:02.438 --> 33:04.399
I… I mean, he helped me track him down.

33:04.482 --> 33:07.068
He even helped me with the camera.

33:08.194 --> 33:09.946
It wouldn't have happened without him.

33:10.530 --> 33:13.950
We talked all night,
and I came away with two important truths.

33:14.033 --> 33:15.868
First, that my dad was right.

33:15.952 --> 33:19.747
Only by feeding our own lives
can we renew love with those around us.

33:19.831 --> 33:21.666
It's how you learn
to approach your partner

33:21.749 --> 33:23.876
with a sense of wonder and curiosity.

33:24.377 --> 33:27.130
And second, that something
had shifted inside Eva.

33:27.213 --> 33:30.800
Her initial goal of studying Frida Kahlo
had led her somewhere else.

33:30.883 --> 33:35.430
There was something under the surface,
a certainty in her that had been shaken.

33:35.513 --> 33:37.640
But I didn't wanna ruin
that wonderful moment

33:37.724 --> 33:39.809
with an indiscreet question.

33:46.524 --> 33:49.861
Later that same night,
I sat down and wrote the essay.

33:51.195 --> 33:53.197
"I began this assignment
with the intention

33:53.281 --> 33:57.034
to explore the nature of identity
by researching The Colombian Leopard."

33:58.411 --> 34:01.289
"But what I found was
that not every aspect of personhood

34:01.372 --> 34:03.499
can be understood through observation."

34:03.583 --> 34:06.252
"Forming an identity
involves introspection."

34:06.335 --> 34:09.005
"A journey outward
implies a journey inward."

34:09.088 --> 34:10.965
"And when we embark on
that journey inward,

34:11.049 --> 34:13.176
we know exactly where we're starting from,

34:13.259 --> 34:15.845
but not necessarily
where we're gonna end up."

34:17.180 --> 34:20.349
"Perhaps the best we can hope for
in any self-exploration

34:20.433 --> 34:22.185
is to set out looking for what we want

34:22.268 --> 34:24.729
and then deviate from the route
we expected to travel."

34:25.354 --> 34:27.356
"Only by embracing the unexpected path

34:27.940 --> 34:30.026
will we end up finding what we need."

34:35.198 --> 34:37.700
There was one thing
that left me unsettled.

34:37.784 --> 34:41.871
Something that I didn't feel was clear
from what Eva had told me.

34:42.747 --> 34:46.709
Something that would soon have
consequences I could never have imagined,

34:46.793 --> 34:49.879
that would prove to be
a turning point in our lives.

34:49.962 --> 34:51.172
I come near her

34:51.255 --> 34:57.094
I just lose my nerve
As I've done from the start

35:00.014 --> 35:02.934
Every little thing she does is magic

35:03.017 --> 35:05.812
Everything she does just turns me on

35:05.895 --> 35:08.815
Even though my life before was tragic

35:08.898 --> 35:12.360
Now I know my love for her goes on

35:12.443 --> 35:13.778
EVA LASTING

35:19.784 --> 35:22.286
Do I have to tell the story

35:22.370 --> 35:27.583
Of a thousand rainy days
Since we first met?

35:31.254 --> 35:33.965
It's a big enough umbrella

35:34.048 --> 35:36.884
But it's always me that ends up

35:36.968 --> 35:41.764
Getting wet

35:42.598 --> 35:45.518
Every little thing she does is magic

35:45.601 --> 35:48.271
Everything she does just turns me on

35:48.354 --> 35:51.274
Even though my life before was tragic

35:51.357 --> 35:57.530
Now I know my love for her goes on

35:59.657 --> 36:01.951
I resolved to call her up

36:02.577 --> 36:04.954
A thousand times a day

36:05.454 --> 36:07.957
And ask her if she'll marry me

36:08.457 --> 36:10.543
In some old-fashioned way

36:10.626 --> 36:13.462
But my silent fears have gripped me

36:13.546 --> 36:16.299
Long before I reach the phone

36:16.382 --> 36:19.302
Long before my tongue has tripped me

36:19.385 --> 36:24.473
Must I always be alone?

36:25.016 --> 36:27.810
Every little thing she does is magic

36:27.894 --> 36:30.938
Everything she does just turns me on

36:31.022 --> 36:33.608
Even though my life before was tragic

36:33.691 --> 36:36.527
Now I know my love for her goes on

36:36.611 --> 36:39.488
Every little thing she does is magic

36:39.572 --> 36:42.241
Everything she does just turns me on

36:42.325 --> 36:45.286
Even though my life before was tragic

36:45.369 --> 36:52.376
Now I know my love for her goes on

36:55.588 --> 36:58.966
On and on and on

36:59.050 --> 37:00.718
And every little thing

37:00.801 --> 37:02.220
Every little thing

37:02.303 --> 37:04.889
Every little thing, every little thing

37:04.972 --> 37:06.557
Every little, every little

37:06.641 --> 37:09.060
Every little
Every little thing she does…