1
00:00:11,320 --> 00:00:12,480
Be strong.
2
00:00:13,360 --> 00:00:14,760
Be nice to your friends.
3
00:00:16,960 --> 00:00:19,280
You always love it
when you do a nice thing, don't you?
4
00:00:19,360 --> 00:00:21,720
[Lisa] I mean... you know, admittedly,
5
00:00:21,800 --> 00:00:24,280
it's usually to apologize
for having said something awful, but...
6
00:00:25,000 --> 00:00:26,760
Well, not awful, but too honest.
7
00:00:27,800 --> 00:00:29,320
Not always the best policy.
8
00:00:29,760 --> 00:00:31,560
[dog whining]
9
00:00:32,320 --> 00:00:33,560
You want your breakfast?
10
00:00:34,840 --> 00:00:36,040
-Yeah?
-[Brandy whining]
11
00:00:37,160 --> 00:00:38,160
Come on, then.
12
00:00:38,480 --> 00:00:41,000
["Top of the World"
by the Carpenters plays]
13
00:00:55,040 --> 00:00:59,240
♪ Such a feeling's coming over me ♪
14
00:00:59,800 --> 00:01:04,600
♪ There is wonder
In most everything I see ♪
15
00:01:05,080 --> 00:01:07,840
♪ Not a cloud in the sky ♪
16
00:01:07,920 --> 00:01:10,280
♪ Got the sun in my eyes ♪
17
00:01:10,360 --> 00:01:15,240
♪ And I won't be surprised
If it's a dream ♪
18
00:01:15,800 --> 00:01:20,240
♪ Everything I want the world to be ♪
19
00:01:20,520 --> 00:01:25,560
♪ Is now coming true
Especially for me ♪
20
00:01:25,920 --> 00:01:28,560
♪ And the reason is clear ♪
21
00:01:28,640 --> 00:01:31,240
♪ It's because you are here ♪
22
00:01:31,320 --> 00:01:35,920
♪ You're the nearest thing to heaven
That I've seen ♪
23
00:01:36,000 --> 00:01:41,440
♪ I'm on the top of the world
Lookin' down on creation ♪
24
00:01:41,520 --> 00:01:46,200
♪ And the only explanation
I can find ♪
25
00:01:46,600 --> 00:01:51,520
♪ Is the love that I've found
Ever since you've been around ♪
26
00:01:51,760 --> 00:01:56,640
♪ Your love's put me
At the top of the world ♪
27
00:02:02,760 --> 00:02:07,200
♪ Something in the wind
Has learned my name ♪
28
00:02:07,480 --> 00:02:12,320
♪ And it's telling me
That things are not the same ♪
29
00:02:12,680 --> 00:02:17,960
♪ In the leaves on the trees
And the touch of the breeze ♪
30
00:02:18,040 --> 00:02:22,800
♪ There's a pleasin' sense of happiness
For me ♪
31
00:02:23,760 --> 00:02:27,960
♪ There is only one wish
On my mind ♪
32
00:02:28,320 --> 00:02:33,080
♪ When this day is through
I hope that I will find ♪
33
00:02:33,440 --> 00:02:38,720
♪ That tomorrow will be
Just the same for you and me ♪
34
00:02:38,800 --> 00:02:43,520
♪ All I need will be mine
If you are here ♪
35
00:02:43,600 --> 00:02:49,000
♪ I'm on the top of the world
Lookin' down on creation ♪
36
00:02:49,080 --> 00:02:53,720
♪And the only explanation
I can find ♪
37
00:02:54,240 --> 00:02:59,080
♪ Is the love that I've found
Ever since you've been around ♪
38
00:02:59,400 --> 00:03:03,880
♪ Your love's put me
At the top of the world ♪
39
00:03:04,200 --> 00:03:09,640
♪ I'm on the top of the world
Looking down on creation ♪
40
00:03:09,720 --> 00:03:14,360
♪ And the only explanation
I can find ♪
41
00:03:14,800 --> 00:03:19,640
♪ Is the love that I've found
Ever since you've been around ♪
42
00:03:19,920 --> 00:03:24,720
♪ Your love's put me
At the top of the world ♪
43
00:03:32,400 --> 00:03:33,760
[doorbell ringing]
44
00:03:35,120 --> 00:03:36,280
-All right?
-[Tony] Yeah.
45
00:03:41,520 --> 00:03:42,640
[Tony sighs]
46
00:03:45,960 --> 00:03:47,160
That's from last night.
47
00:03:47,560 --> 00:03:49,680
And that's the last one in the house,
so...
48
00:03:50,120 --> 00:03:52,320
Got to sort myself out. Get better.
49
00:03:53,000 --> 00:03:54,120
What we doing today?
50
00:03:54,200 --> 00:03:56,400
-"Tambury's Oldest Woman."
-Right. How old is she?
51
00:03:56,480 --> 00:03:58,680
Hundred.
She's got a telegram from the Queen.
52
00:03:59,840 --> 00:04:01,360
-Are you all right?
-Huh? Yeah.
53
00:04:02,840 --> 00:04:05,960
[sighs] Just... feeling a bit low.
54
00:04:06,040 --> 00:04:09,280
-Come on, mate. You were doing so well.
-[Tony] Just feeling sorry for myself.
55
00:04:09,360 --> 00:04:10,760
And guilty about that.
56
00:04:10,840 --> 00:04:13,640
I meet people every day
with worse lives than me,
57
00:04:14,240 --> 00:04:15,480
and they get on with it.
58
00:04:16,920 --> 00:04:18,480
I'm gonna try and be more zen.
59
00:04:19,880 --> 00:04:21,840
I'm not going to let cunts wind me up.
60
00:04:22,360 --> 00:04:23,520
Is that a Buddha quote?
61
00:04:25,000 --> 00:04:25,880
Exactly.
62
00:04:27,640 --> 00:04:29,160
How's it going with the nurse?
63
00:04:29,240 --> 00:04:30,240
Oh, um...
64
00:04:30,840 --> 00:04:32,200
We're just friends, so...
65
00:04:32,640 --> 00:04:34,080
-Oh.
-[Tony] No, it's fine.
66
00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:36,360
She said I wasn't over Lisa.
67
00:04:37,280 --> 00:04:38,320
She's right.
68
00:04:38,400 --> 00:04:41,200
Well, don't miss the boat.
She won't wait forever.
69
00:04:42,840 --> 00:04:43,960
I still miss Lisa.
70
00:04:45,840 --> 00:04:46,920
All the time.
71
00:04:47,320 --> 00:04:50,720
But she wouldn't want me to,
not like this. Not in this much pain.
72
00:04:51,200 --> 00:04:52,040
I'm...
73
00:04:53,200 --> 00:04:54,880
getting a bit better every day.
74
00:04:58,200 --> 00:04:59,200
Come on.
75
00:05:02,960 --> 00:05:04,920
[Tony] How did you feel
when you got the telegram?
76
00:05:05,960 --> 00:05:06,880
What?
77
00:05:06,960 --> 00:05:09,880
[raises voice] How did you feel
when you got the telegram from the Queen?
78
00:05:10,280 --> 00:05:12,320
Same as I feel every other day.
79
00:05:12,720 --> 00:05:16,160
Dreadful. In pain.
Wishing I hadn't lived through the night.
80
00:05:17,000 --> 00:05:18,040
The Queen, though?
81
00:05:18,800 --> 00:05:20,240
Some butler sent this.
82
00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:24,680
What advice would you give to someone
to have a long life like yours?
83
00:05:25,040 --> 00:05:26,040
Don't.
84
00:05:26,480 --> 00:05:27,920
It's fucking awful.
85
00:05:28,360 --> 00:05:30,000
It hurts just to be alive.
86
00:05:30,880 --> 00:05:32,560
Here's my typical month:
87
00:05:33,320 --> 00:05:35,120
first week, diarrhea.
88
00:05:35,640 --> 00:05:37,320
The next three weeks?
89
00:05:37,720 --> 00:05:39,120
I can't shit at all!
90
00:05:40,440 --> 00:05:43,080
You must've seen a lot, though?
A hundred years.
91
00:05:43,160 --> 00:05:47,760
I was born in Tambury.
I'll die in Tambury - very soon, I hope.
92
00:05:47,840 --> 00:05:49,480
I've seen fuck-all!
93
00:05:49,880 --> 00:05:51,480
I may as well have been a tree.
94
00:05:52,840 --> 00:05:54,600
What do your family think of this?
95
00:05:55,440 --> 00:05:57,680
I haven't got a family, they all died.
96
00:05:58,280 --> 00:06:00,840
Right... Your friends here, though?
97
00:06:00,920 --> 00:06:03,000
[exasperated sigh] They're not friends.
98
00:06:03,560 --> 00:06:04,880
They're cunts.
99
00:06:05,320 --> 00:06:06,320
All of them.
100
00:06:06,400 --> 00:06:09,160
I hate every single one of them.
101
00:06:09,240 --> 00:06:12,320
-[distant coughing]
-And when I outlive one of them,
102
00:06:12,640 --> 00:06:15,400
they bring a new cunt in
to take their place.
103
00:06:16,520 --> 00:06:17,440
Cunts!
104
00:06:20,560 --> 00:06:23,040
-Good. Take a picture.
-[Lenny] Yeah!
105
00:06:26,160 --> 00:06:27,200
Er, smile.
106
00:06:28,520 --> 00:06:29,880
-Bollocks.
-[camera clicks]
107
00:06:30,280 --> 00:06:31,280
[Lenny] Great.
108
00:06:34,880 --> 00:06:36,920
-[shaver whirs]
-[knocking on door]
109
00:06:38,520 --> 00:06:41,120
-[Matt] You all right?
-Hey. Is it all right if I...?
110
00:06:41,560 --> 00:06:45,120
Just a mad rush getting out
of the house this morning, you know.
111
00:06:46,360 --> 00:06:48,040
I know you've been sleeping here.
112
00:06:50,120 --> 00:06:50,960
Right.
113
00:06:51,040 --> 00:06:53,240
Look, I'm shacked up with June now,
114
00:06:53,760 --> 00:06:56,200
so my flat is just sitting there empty.
115
00:06:56,880 --> 00:06:59,240
And it's council,
so I don't want to give that up.
116
00:06:59,320 --> 00:07:01,400
Well, you're welcome to stay there
as long as you need.
117
00:07:01,960 --> 00:07:03,560
That means a lot. Thanks, Lenny.
118
00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:06,160
What happened, anyway?
119
00:07:06,640 --> 00:07:09,000
[Matt] I don't think anything happened,
like, specific.
120
00:07:09,400 --> 00:07:12,240
I think she just needed a moment
to take a deep breath and...
121
00:07:13,320 --> 00:07:15,200
figure it all out, and, uh, yeah...
122
00:07:16,120 --> 00:07:17,600
I'm giving her that moment.
123
00:07:19,400 --> 00:07:21,400
-A favor for a favor?
-Mm-hmm.
124
00:07:21,480 --> 00:07:25,400
Getting a bit of pressure from June
to get her kid some work experience.
125
00:07:25,480 --> 00:07:27,440
Uh... um, we can't afford it.
126
00:07:27,520 --> 00:07:29,880
-I'm sorry.
-No, just work experience, no money.
127
00:07:30,320 --> 00:07:32,240
She just wants him out of the house,
I think.
128
00:07:32,320 --> 00:07:33,160
Right.
129
00:07:33,640 --> 00:07:34,600
Uh...
130
00:07:35,040 --> 00:07:36,840
Yes, of course.
131
00:07:36,920 --> 00:07:37,920
-Great.
-[Matt] Yeah.
132
00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:40,320
I'll tell June. Thanks, Matt.
133
00:07:40,400 --> 00:07:41,720
Thank you, Lenny, yeah.
134
00:07:47,680 --> 00:07:48,560
Hiya.
135
00:07:48,640 --> 00:07:49,840
-[Matt] Hi.
-You busy?
136
00:07:50,320 --> 00:07:51,360
No, come in.
137
00:08:00,240 --> 00:08:02,720
Sorry to hear about your marriage ending
and all that.
138
00:08:03,800 --> 00:08:04,800
Thanks, yeah.
139
00:08:06,720 --> 00:08:08,560
You're a very lovely man, though.
140
00:08:10,600 --> 00:08:13,520
-Sorry, what...?
-Kind. Intelligent.
141
00:08:14,240 --> 00:08:15,200
Smart.
142
00:08:16,280 --> 00:08:17,200
'Andsome.
143
00:08:17,840 --> 00:08:18,680
Perfect.
144
00:08:18,920 --> 00:08:20,840
[splutters] Thanks.
145
00:08:20,920 --> 00:08:23,720
We've kept this relationship
completely professional until now,
146
00:08:23,800 --> 00:08:25,080
and I appreciate that,
147
00:08:25,800 --> 00:08:28,800
but I just want you to know
that if you ever did make a move, I--
148
00:08:28,880 --> 00:08:29,920
A move?
149
00:08:31,680 --> 00:08:32,840
[Kath] Yeah, you know.
150
00:08:33,880 --> 00:08:35,040
I've always liked you.
151
00:08:36,960 --> 00:08:39,520
So, you know, if ever you wanted to, um...
152
00:08:40,560 --> 00:08:41,560
meet up...
153
00:08:42,520 --> 00:08:43,560
outside of work...
154
00:08:45,160 --> 00:08:46,320
you know, for some fun?
155
00:08:49,680 --> 00:08:51,400
Then... I'm up for it.
156
00:08:51,880 --> 00:08:52,880
Are you?
157
00:09:00,200 --> 00:09:01,240
See you later.
158
00:09:14,200 --> 00:09:15,640
[Tony] Don't sit in my chair.
159
00:09:24,120 --> 00:09:24,960
You all right?
160
00:09:26,200 --> 00:09:27,920
Kath just said she likes me.
161
00:09:29,040 --> 00:09:29,960
Good.
162
00:09:30,040 --> 00:09:31,800
-No, like, she fancies me.
-[sniggers]
163
00:09:32,800 --> 00:09:33,800
What, are you 13?
164
00:09:34,200 --> 00:09:35,280
It's awkward.
165
00:09:36,040 --> 00:09:37,160
Don't worry about it.
166
00:09:39,120 --> 00:09:40,120
All right.
167
00:09:40,960 --> 00:09:42,120
What about you, you OK?
168
00:09:42,200 --> 00:09:44,440
Yeah, I'm just trying to be more zen.
169
00:09:45,560 --> 00:09:47,400
Wow... OK.
170
00:09:48,280 --> 00:09:49,720
Um... Well, I tell you what,
171
00:09:49,800 --> 00:09:52,480
you should come to the meditation class
I go to after work.
172
00:09:52,560 --> 00:09:53,640
Every Tuesday.
173
00:09:54,000 --> 00:09:55,200
It's a bit of yoga,
174
00:09:55,600 --> 00:09:58,200
a bit of... Don't shake your head,
you haven't heard what it is yet.
175
00:09:58,280 --> 00:09:59,960
-Yoga, a bit of philosophy...
-Mm.
176
00:10:00,040 --> 00:10:01,720
-...which you like, don't you?
-Yeah.
177
00:10:01,800 --> 00:10:03,040
Right. So, what do you think?
178
00:10:03,120 --> 00:10:04,120
-Don't just--
-No.
179
00:10:05,440 --> 00:10:06,560
Come on, please?
180
00:10:07,040 --> 00:10:08,800
I'm having a shit time as well, OK?
181
00:10:08,880 --> 00:10:11,840
I'm alone. I'm sleeping on a floor.
182
00:10:11,920 --> 00:10:12,920
[Tony] That's zen.
183
00:10:13,760 --> 00:10:16,320
-Uh...
-Like Mr. Miyagi. They love a floor.
184
00:10:17,040 --> 00:10:18,640
"They"? You... [frustrated sigh]
185
00:10:19,000 --> 00:10:19,880
Right.
186
00:10:22,120 --> 00:10:24,080
-Please?
-Oh, for fuck's sake.
187
00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:26,960
All right.
188
00:10:27,360 --> 00:10:28,520
-Thank you.
-Is that it?
189
00:10:28,600 --> 00:10:30,560
Yeah. Yes, that's...
190
00:10:31,080 --> 00:10:31,920
-fine.
-Good.
191
00:10:32,760 --> 00:10:34,680
Don't tell anyone about... Kath.
192
00:10:34,760 --> 00:10:36,120
I'd already forgotten that.
193
00:10:36,200 --> 00:10:37,240
-Perfect.
-All right?
194
00:10:37,320 --> 00:10:38,960
-Yeah, good. I'm... Yeah.
-Good.
195
00:10:41,440 --> 00:10:42,920
Don't tell anyone?
196
00:10:50,040 --> 00:10:50,960
[sighs]
197
00:10:58,080 --> 00:10:59,720
See, all respectable again.
198
00:11:00,760 --> 00:11:03,440
-Had a bit of bed head in the back there.
-[Tony] Hiya.
199
00:11:03,760 --> 00:11:05,280
-Hi.
-Hi, Dad.
200
00:11:07,400 --> 00:11:08,440
[Tony sighs]
201
00:11:09,040 --> 00:11:12,080
I, uh... just interviewed
a hundred-year-old woman.
202
00:11:12,160 --> 00:11:13,440
-Oh, yeah?
-Funny.
203
00:11:14,920 --> 00:11:15,760
And, uh...
204
00:11:17,080 --> 00:11:20,160
Lenny asked me
how it was going with the nurse.
205
00:11:21,640 --> 00:11:24,480
I said, uh... we're just friends 'cause...
206
00:11:26,200 --> 00:11:29,360
you'd said I wasn't over... Lisa.
207
00:11:29,440 --> 00:11:31,560
And did you say you agreed?
208
00:11:32,760 --> 00:11:33,760
Yeah, course. Yeah.
209
00:11:34,960 --> 00:11:36,000
What did he say?
210
00:11:36,080 --> 00:11:39,480
He said I shouldn't wait around forever
or I'll miss the boat. [chuckles]
211
00:11:40,600 --> 00:11:41,440
Mm...
212
00:11:42,080 --> 00:11:43,080
[Tony] So...
213
00:11:45,920 --> 00:11:47,480
Have you not told him my name?
214
00:11:48,080 --> 00:11:48,960
What do you mean?
215
00:11:49,040 --> 00:11:51,240
He said, "How's it going with the nurse?"
216
00:11:51,640 --> 00:11:52,560
[Tony] Uh...
217
00:11:52,640 --> 00:11:55,920
Yeah, I'm sure I have.
That wasn't really the point of the story.
218
00:11:56,480 --> 00:11:57,760
-[grunts]
-Joe?
219
00:11:58,120 --> 00:11:58,960
What?
220
00:11:59,040 --> 00:12:00,040
You're Joe.
221
00:12:01,360 --> 00:12:02,360
Joe, your brother?
222
00:12:02,440 --> 00:12:03,640
Hello, mate.
223
00:12:05,480 --> 00:12:09,240
I do look a bit like him. I mean,
he's been dead ten years, but still...
224
00:12:09,800 --> 00:12:10,960
What, Joe's dead?
225
00:12:11,040 --> 00:12:12,120
[Tony sighs]
226
00:12:12,560 --> 00:12:15,680
Oh, that's right, yeah. Joe's dead.
Yeah. Lovely fella.
227
00:12:17,040 --> 00:12:19,600
So, you're Joe's boy?
228
00:12:20,600 --> 00:12:21,680
I'm your boy, Dad.
229
00:12:22,920 --> 00:12:24,000
Am I Joe?
230
00:12:24,080 --> 00:12:25,120
Fuck me.
231
00:12:25,200 --> 00:12:29,000
And just for the record, I didn't declare
that we would just be friends.
232
00:12:29,080 --> 00:12:31,240
When I said
I didn't think you were over your wife,
233
00:12:31,320 --> 00:12:34,680
I just thought it might, I don't know,
gee you up a bit to be ready.
234
00:12:34,760 --> 00:12:36,080
Not just say, "Do you know what?
235
00:12:36,160 --> 00:12:38,160
That's all right.
Let's just be friends, eh?"
236
00:12:38,240 --> 00:12:41,040
Well, all I was doing was
agreeing with your observation
237
00:12:41,120 --> 00:12:42,200
that I wasn't over Lisa--
238
00:12:42,280 --> 00:12:44,480
Do you know what? It's fine.
Just don't worry about it.
239
00:12:44,560 --> 00:12:45,680
-Right.
-[nurse] You know.
240
00:12:45,760 --> 00:12:47,440
-All right, gorgeous?
-[nurse] Oh!
241
00:12:47,960 --> 00:12:49,040
Hiya.
242
00:12:49,120 --> 00:12:51,560
-[man] Where is she?
-[nurse ]She's in her room.
243
00:12:52,160 --> 00:12:54,920
-All right. See you later, babe.
-[nurse chuckles]
244
00:12:57,480 --> 00:12:58,440
Who's that?
245
00:12:58,520 --> 00:13:01,200
Simon. He's the son
of one of the new residents.
246
00:13:01,280 --> 00:13:02,120
Right.
247
00:13:02,800 --> 00:13:04,000
He's nice.
248
00:13:04,920 --> 00:13:05,920
He winked.
249
00:13:06,760 --> 00:13:09,400
He said, "See you later, babe,"
and winked.
250
00:13:10,480 --> 00:13:11,320
So?
251
00:13:11,840 --> 00:13:13,120
So... [chuckles]
252
00:13:14,800 --> 00:13:15,840
Right. Anyway...
253
00:13:16,840 --> 00:13:17,840
I'd better get on.
254
00:13:19,280 --> 00:13:20,400
See you later, babe.
255
00:13:25,160 --> 00:13:27,080
[Tony] I feel... panicked
256
00:13:27,880 --> 00:13:28,880
all the time.
257
00:13:29,520 --> 00:13:32,080
Like... I'm going to do the wrong thing.
258
00:13:32,160 --> 00:13:34,680
So... I don't do anything.
259
00:13:36,800 --> 00:13:40,200
And that's why I think I'm going to
blow it with the nurse, but...
260
00:13:41,480 --> 00:13:43,800
Concentrate on getting better.
She'll wait.
261
00:13:44,560 --> 00:13:45,680
If you want her to.
262
00:13:46,080 --> 00:13:47,520
I'm not sure I'm worth...
263
00:13:48,280 --> 00:13:50,240
waiting for. I'm embarrassed...
264
00:13:50,960 --> 00:13:52,760
that I ever acted the way I did.
265
00:13:53,720 --> 00:13:55,040
Whatever gets you better.
266
00:13:56,360 --> 00:13:58,360
Yeah. I'm not better, but...
267
00:13:59,280 --> 00:14:01,080
I'm not gonna stick my head
in the oven.
268
00:14:02,520 --> 00:14:04,320
I doubt you know where the oven is.
269
00:14:06,600 --> 00:14:08,120
-Good one!
-[Anne chuckles]
270
00:14:08,800 --> 00:14:10,000
You were in pain.
271
00:14:12,160 --> 00:14:14,240
Yeah, that's what
I'm embarrassed about, really.
272
00:14:14,640 --> 00:14:15,680
Dying of cancer,
273
00:14:16,760 --> 00:14:17,880
that's being in pain.
274
00:14:18,360 --> 00:14:19,360
Actual pain.
275
00:14:19,800 --> 00:14:21,280
I felt a bit sorry for myself.
276
00:14:21,840 --> 00:14:22,840
I still do.
277
00:14:23,520 --> 00:14:24,520
But, uh...
278
00:14:25,480 --> 00:14:26,520
I realized that...
279
00:14:27,520 --> 00:14:29,320
death will come soon enough, so...
280
00:14:30,280 --> 00:14:33,080
And there's nothing to fear about it
because...
281
00:14:35,200 --> 00:14:37,080
you know, no feelings to worry about.
282
00:14:37,840 --> 00:14:40,000
Not mine, anyway. Just...
283
00:14:42,080 --> 00:14:43,520
you know, peace and quiet.
284
00:14:45,000 --> 00:14:48,880
I am trying to work out if there's a way
I can still carry on annoying people,
285
00:14:48,960 --> 00:14:50,440
after I die, but I haven't...
286
00:14:50,520 --> 00:14:52,080
-[Anne laughs]
-I haven't cracked it yet.
287
00:14:52,160 --> 00:14:55,160
So, I'm just gonna have to make the most
of that when I'm alive.
288
00:14:55,720 --> 00:14:57,200
-It's a hobby.
-Yeah.
289
00:14:58,880 --> 00:14:59,800
Exactly.
290
00:15:00,160 --> 00:15:02,040
Just to arseholes, though. That's...
291
00:15:02,720 --> 00:15:04,920
you know, I'm trying to be nice
to the people...
292
00:15:05,960 --> 00:15:07,440
who are nice to me, at least.
293
00:15:09,240 --> 00:15:11,000
I realized that everyone's struggling,
294
00:15:11,080 --> 00:15:13,600
and, um, I feel
that I should help the people...
295
00:15:14,640 --> 00:15:15,680
who helped me.
296
00:15:16,920 --> 00:15:21,520
I'm actually going to a meditation...
yoga... thing tonight.
297
00:15:22,360 --> 00:15:23,360
It's a favor...
298
00:15:24,200 --> 00:15:25,840
for my brother-in-law, who...
299
00:15:26,800 --> 00:15:29,240
is separated from his wife, and...
300
00:15:30,880 --> 00:15:32,680
he could do with the company, so...
301
00:15:33,720 --> 00:15:34,640
you know.
302
00:15:36,040 --> 00:15:36,920
Lovely.
303
00:15:38,280 --> 00:15:39,200
Mm.
304
00:15:43,960 --> 00:15:45,080
[door opens]
305
00:15:45,600 --> 00:15:46,520
Oh...
306
00:15:46,800 --> 00:15:48,640
Coffee. I am gasping.
307
00:15:50,880 --> 00:15:52,160
-Come in.
-[Roxy] What?
308
00:15:52,800 --> 00:15:53,680
Nothing.
309
00:15:54,320 --> 00:15:56,480
-What, me just letting myself in?
-Well,
310
00:15:56,560 --> 00:15:58,800
some would've knocked.
I could've been naked.
311
00:15:59,440 --> 00:16:01,720
Uh... I could see through the door
you weren't naked.
312
00:16:02,440 --> 00:16:03,960
Well, that doesn't make any sense.
313
00:16:04,080 --> 00:16:07,880
If I had have been naked, you'd look
through the door and see me naked.
314
00:16:07,960 --> 00:16:09,640
Yeah, and I wouldn't have come in.
315
00:16:10,400 --> 00:16:11,920
But you'd have seen me naked.
316
00:16:12,000 --> 00:16:13,560
[chuckles] Wouldn't have bothered me.
317
00:16:14,400 --> 00:16:16,680
That's all right, then.
What would you have done?
318
00:16:17,440 --> 00:16:19,560
-What do you mean?
-You come to the door,
319
00:16:19,640 --> 00:16:21,840
you see me naked, you don't come in,
320
00:16:22,960 --> 00:16:23,800
what then?
321
00:16:24,320 --> 00:16:25,360
I'd have knocked.
322
00:16:25,800 --> 00:16:27,880
So, now, I'm here naked,
323
00:16:28,480 --> 00:16:32,120
I hear a knock, I look up,
I see you looking through at me,
324
00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:33,840
what do you do, fucking wave?
325
00:16:34,680 --> 00:16:36,160
[chuckling] I don't know!
326
00:16:36,240 --> 00:16:38,800
Maybe I wouldn't knock,
maybe I'd just sneak off.
327
00:16:39,840 --> 00:16:41,080
Anyway...
328
00:16:41,160 --> 00:16:45,280
why are you sat at a table naked
like some weird Monty Python sketch?
329
00:16:45,360 --> 00:16:46,720
That's my business.
330
00:16:46,800 --> 00:16:48,280
My house, my rules.
331
00:16:49,880 --> 00:16:51,840
-Do you sit at the table naked, then?
-No.
332
00:16:51,920 --> 00:16:54,680
I've got a dog.
I don't want her seeing that. [sniggers]
333
00:16:59,720 --> 00:17:01,480
What do you miss about her, though?
334
00:17:02,440 --> 00:17:04,080
Everything. You know, I...
335
00:17:04,840 --> 00:17:07,000
I miss her liking me.
336
00:17:07,880 --> 00:17:08,840
Um...
337
00:17:09,360 --> 00:17:11,480
I hate to think
I've upset her in some way.
338
00:17:12,160 --> 00:17:14,160
Or that she just doesn't love me anymore.
339
00:17:16,120 --> 00:17:17,040
Um...
340
00:17:19,720 --> 00:17:20,840
Don't worry about it.
341
00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:25,680
What do you mean?
342
00:17:26,200 --> 00:17:27,480
Is that advice?
343
00:17:27,560 --> 00:17:28,520
Yeah.
344
00:17:29,200 --> 00:17:30,840
Just don't worry about it, mate.
345
00:17:32,960 --> 00:17:35,600
Yeah... Just not that easy, though, is it?
[chuckles]
346
00:17:35,680 --> 00:17:39,120
You know, it's like saying,
"Don't worry that you're bleeding."
347
00:17:39,520 --> 00:17:41,480
You know, just by saying that,
it doesn't go away.
348
00:17:41,560 --> 00:17:44,400
I was bleeding from the anus
for a month last year
349
00:17:44,480 --> 00:17:45,920
and I never went to the doctor.
350
00:17:47,320 --> 00:17:48,160
Right.
351
00:17:50,200 --> 00:17:51,280
It just went away.
352
00:17:54,920 --> 00:17:56,880
But, I mean,
you're the doctor in this, aren't you?
353
00:17:56,960 --> 00:17:58,480
So are you saying
I shouldn't go to you?
354
00:17:58,560 --> 00:18:01,160
No, of course not.
What I'm saying is you've got to ignore
355
00:18:01,240 --> 00:18:03,600
worrying about her and start doing stuff.
356
00:18:03,680 --> 00:18:04,720
[Matt] Yeah.
357
00:18:04,800 --> 00:18:07,040
You should come out with me,
Ratty, and the Nonce.
358
00:18:07,480 --> 00:18:09,720
-The Nonce?
-Real name Ian Trouton,
359
00:18:10,400 --> 00:18:13,040
but we call him "the Nonce"
or "Pedo Ian."
360
00:18:14,280 --> 00:18:17,720
I mean, he's not a real kiddy fiddler.
It's a... it's an in-joke.
361
00:18:17,800 --> 00:18:18,800
Oh. [chuckles]
362
00:18:19,440 --> 00:18:21,800
He fucked a dwarf once
when he was off his head.
363
00:18:22,800 --> 00:18:23,880
[laughs]
364
00:18:24,440 --> 00:18:26,280
He said it was like fucking a child.
365
00:18:27,720 --> 00:18:30,840
But legal. Although, should it be? Urgh.
366
00:18:34,800 --> 00:18:38,040
Um... I would go to the doctor
about your anus, by the way.
367
00:18:41,520 --> 00:18:44,000
Hiya. Could I just use your bathroom?
368
00:18:44,080 --> 00:18:47,120
-[sighs] All right. Upstairs.
-Ta.
369
00:18:50,920 --> 00:18:52,040
[Brandy whines]
370
00:18:53,240 --> 00:18:54,360
[snaps fingers]
371
00:18:55,880 --> 00:18:58,040
All right. Come here,
I want to show you something.
372
00:18:58,120 --> 00:19:00,680
Tony, do you want to explain
what this is, please?
373
00:19:00,800 --> 00:19:02,320
Oh, um...
374
00:19:02,400 --> 00:19:06,640
I'm holding a sweepstake
on how long the marriage will last,
375
00:19:06,720 --> 00:19:08,240
so you can bet on what you think.
376
00:19:08,320 --> 00:19:11,080
Choices are: "under a month,"
"one to six months,"
377
00:19:11,160 --> 00:19:12,440
"six months to a year,"
378
00:19:12,520 --> 00:19:15,760
"one to two years," "two to four years,"
or "four to ten years."
379
00:19:15,840 --> 00:19:17,520
-I put "four to ten years."
-Oh, thanks.
380
00:19:17,600 --> 00:19:18,680
-You're welcome.
-Yeah.
381
00:19:19,640 --> 00:19:21,160
I'll go "two to four" myself.
382
00:19:21,240 --> 00:19:22,640
[guffawing]
383
00:19:22,720 --> 00:19:25,520
-[Tony] Fivers. Give us your fiver.
-[Matt] "Under a month," that's mine.
384
00:19:29,840 --> 00:19:30,680
[Tony] Right...
385
00:19:32,080 --> 00:19:33,080
What's he doing?
386
00:19:34,080 --> 00:19:35,080
Good girl.
387
00:19:40,920 --> 00:19:43,000
Mate, I've got to go out.
388
00:19:43,080 --> 00:19:45,400
[Pat] All right, see you later.
I'll lock up.
389
00:19:45,760 --> 00:19:47,520
No, you won't. Get out.
390
00:19:48,360 --> 00:19:50,520
-[water sloshing]
-[Tony] What the fuck?
391
00:19:54,560 --> 00:19:57,240
Fuck me!
I thought you were having a piss.
392
00:19:57,320 --> 00:20:00,280
No, I've got to go out after,
so I thought I'd have a wash.
393
00:20:00,360 --> 00:20:01,440
[Tony] Unbelievable!
394
00:20:01,960 --> 00:20:02,960
Get out.
395
00:20:04,240 --> 00:20:05,160
Out!
396
00:20:06,320 --> 00:20:07,600
Well, turn round, then!
397
00:20:08,760 --> 00:20:09,880
Fucking hell!
398
00:20:11,120 --> 00:20:12,120
All clean!
399
00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:16,080
Do you know how fucking mental it is,
a postman having a bath on his round?
400
00:20:16,480 --> 00:20:18,120
-Why?
-It just is.
401
00:20:18,200 --> 00:20:20,720
There's nothing weird
about helping out a mate.
402
00:20:20,800 --> 00:20:24,280
I need to see a potential flat share
later, don't I? I've been homeless.
403
00:20:24,360 --> 00:20:26,160
Been sleeping in the depot.
404
00:20:26,240 --> 00:20:29,280
I didn't want to turn up all scruffy,
did I, stinking of BO?
405
00:20:29,360 --> 00:20:32,480
Oh, this is typical.
I try and be more chilled.
406
00:20:32,560 --> 00:20:35,200
The reason I'm in a hurry is
that I've got a meditation class tonight
407
00:20:35,280 --> 00:20:36,640
to try and be more zen,
408
00:20:36,720 --> 00:20:39,520
and then shit like this happens
to wind me the fuck up again.
409
00:20:39,600 --> 00:20:41,760
Don't think the Dalai Lama'd be like that,
would he?
410
00:20:41,840 --> 00:20:43,520
Let's see, shall we?
Go to his house tomorrow
411
00:20:43,600 --> 00:20:46,680
and start washing your fucking arse
in his sink, see what he does.
412
00:20:46,760 --> 00:20:48,880
-Is that my aftershave?
-Yeah. Nice, innit?
413
00:20:48,960 --> 00:20:50,240
-Fuckin' hell.
-Expensive.
414
00:20:51,640 --> 00:20:52,480
Out.
415
00:20:54,000 --> 00:20:55,000
See ya, mate.
416
00:20:56,560 --> 00:20:57,480
Prat.
417
00:21:00,720 --> 00:21:02,160
Just wiggle it.
418
00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:05,440
And if you want
to get into your positions, please.
419
00:21:05,720 --> 00:21:06,600
[Matt] Hey.
420
00:21:07,000 --> 00:21:08,800
Hi, Matt. Hi.
421
00:21:09,320 --> 00:21:11,200
-Simon, this is Tony. He's--
-Welcome.
422
00:21:11,280 --> 00:21:13,520
He's not done this before,
so go easy on him.
423
00:21:14,840 --> 00:21:17,600
Nothing to be scared of.
We're a very friendly tribe.
424
00:21:18,600 --> 00:21:20,080
-OK.
-All right.
425
00:21:21,840 --> 00:21:22,880
Where's your mind?
426
00:21:23,440 --> 00:21:25,160
-Where's my...?
-Where's your mind?
427
00:21:25,240 --> 00:21:27,320
Don't think about it too much,
just answer.
428
00:21:27,400 --> 00:21:29,240
Uh... in my brain.
429
00:21:30,240 --> 00:21:31,320
-No.
-[Tony] No?
430
00:21:31,800 --> 00:21:32,800
In my gut.
431
00:21:34,560 --> 00:21:36,400
-No.
-I don't know. Where's my mind?
432
00:21:36,800 --> 00:21:37,880
It's in...
433
00:21:38,520 --> 00:21:40,280
every cell of your body.
434
00:21:42,720 --> 00:21:43,680
OK.
435
00:21:44,640 --> 00:21:46,720
I want you to really think about that.
436
00:21:48,760 --> 00:21:49,880
On all fours.
437
00:21:50,400 --> 00:21:52,200
-Please.
-OK.
438
00:21:52,840 --> 00:21:53,920
-Shoes off, Tony.
-No.
439
00:21:54,480 --> 00:21:55,720
-No?
-No.
440
00:21:57,720 --> 00:21:59,480
-[Tony sighs]
-[chimes tinkling]
441
00:22:04,720 --> 00:22:06,560
So, let's start with a deep breath.
442
00:22:06,640 --> 00:22:07,800
[inhales deeply]
443
00:22:07,880 --> 00:22:09,360
Inhale.
444
00:22:09,440 --> 00:22:11,200
[class inhales]
445
00:22:11,280 --> 00:22:12,600
Lift your tailbone.
446
00:22:13,080 --> 00:22:14,840
Heart out, push away the floor.
447
00:22:15,760 --> 00:22:19,160
-And exhale, sigh out the pain.
-[loud exhaling]
448
00:22:20,720 --> 00:22:22,640
And shine your heart forward.
449
00:22:23,240 --> 00:22:25,120
And gaze into your pelvis.
450
00:22:25,920 --> 00:22:27,880
And look out of your third eye.
[sniffs]
451
00:22:28,560 --> 00:22:29,800
-You hear that?
-Yeah, just...
452
00:22:29,880 --> 00:22:31,680
Let's do that ten times. [Simon sniffs]
453
00:22:36,600 --> 00:22:39,560
[Simon slurps] Ah!
454
00:22:39,680 --> 00:22:40,640
Are you joking?
455
00:22:40,960 --> 00:22:42,600
[slurping] Mm.
456
00:22:43,440 --> 00:22:45,560
Green tea. Delicious.
457
00:22:45,640 --> 00:22:47,280
-Sounds it!
-Shh! Tony...
458
00:22:47,720 --> 00:22:48,680
[slurping]
459
00:22:49,120 --> 00:22:50,120
[sniffing]
460
00:22:50,200 --> 00:22:51,200
Fucking hell.
461
00:22:51,680 --> 00:22:52,560
You OK, Tony?
462
00:22:52,640 --> 00:22:53,680
-Yep.
-[Simon] Yeah?
463
00:22:54,360 --> 00:22:55,360
OK, good.
464
00:22:55,880 --> 00:22:56,840
[sniffs, snorts]
465
00:22:56,920 --> 00:22:58,080
Oh, fuck!
466
00:22:58,160 --> 00:23:00,640
-Just don't listen to it.
-[Simon] And keep going, guys.
467
00:23:00,760 --> 00:23:01,840
-[sniffs]
-Got a little cold?
468
00:23:03,000 --> 00:23:04,560
Never. No.
469
00:23:04,640 --> 00:23:07,120
-Oh!
-[Simon] Illness is a state of mind.
470
00:23:07,560 --> 00:23:10,440
I don't want to feel ill,
I don't want to feel pain.
471
00:23:10,880 --> 00:23:13,440
[sarcastic laugh]
You're going about it the wrong way.
472
00:23:13,520 --> 00:23:16,360
-Please don't.
-Any bad things that have happened to you,
473
00:23:16,840 --> 00:23:18,000
you must've welcomed them in.
474
00:23:18,080 --> 00:23:19,880
No. No way.
475
00:23:19,960 --> 00:23:21,320
We have a choice. [sniffs]
476
00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:22,320
Fuck that!
477
00:23:22,400 --> 00:23:24,280
-Please.
-[Tony] That's ridiculous.
478
00:23:24,360 --> 00:23:28,560
Wind chimes? Slurping? Sniffing?
How is that relaxing?
479
00:23:28,640 --> 00:23:29,680
It's disgusting.
480
00:23:30,680 --> 00:23:33,520
I'm off to get pissed out of my mind
in every cell of my body.
481
00:23:35,360 --> 00:23:36,320
See you next Tuesday.
482
00:23:36,400 --> 00:23:39,160
You're not wrong there,
you fucking snot-curdling cunt!
483
00:23:41,880 --> 00:23:43,240
OK. Um...
484
00:23:44,040 --> 00:23:46,480
-Everyone into plank, please.
-[Matt] Great.
485
00:23:47,160 --> 00:23:49,880
Thank you.
What was that, about two minutes?
486
00:23:49,960 --> 00:23:51,280
I don't know, I couldn't.
487
00:23:51,720 --> 00:23:53,280
I thought you were feeling better.
488
00:23:54,560 --> 00:23:55,560
I am now.
489
00:23:57,080 --> 00:23:59,040
["These Days" by Jackson Browne plays]
490
00:24:10,560 --> 00:24:14,000
♪ Well, I've been out walkin' ♪
491
00:24:17,240 --> 00:24:23,880
♪ I don't do that much talkin'
These days ♪
492
00:24:24,320 --> 00:24:31,120
♪ These days ♪
493
00:24:31,760 --> 00:24:34,920
♪These days, I seem to think a lot ♪
494
00:24:35,640 --> 00:24:41,840
♪ About the things that I forgot to do ♪
495
00:24:42,120 --> 00:24:45,440
♪ For you ♪
496
00:24:45,760 --> 00:24:51,160
♪And all the times
I had the chance to... ♪
497
00:24:51,240 --> 00:24:54,080
[Tony] Fucking hell, look at that!
Pissed again!
498
00:24:54,320 --> 00:24:56,160
-Pfft!
-[Lisa laughs]
499
00:24:56,320 --> 00:24:59,760
-Oh, like you're sober? Don't.
-[Tony] Yeah, but I can hold my drink.
500
00:25:00,960 --> 00:25:04,200
[slurring] Yeah, but you're a man,
you've got a bigger liver!
501
00:25:04,480 --> 00:25:06,680
-[Tony chuckles] "Lidver..."
-[Lisa giggles]
502
00:25:07,200 --> 00:25:09,880
[Lisa] When we get through two bottles
of wine a night,
503
00:25:09,960 --> 00:25:12,040
it's killing me quicker
than it's killing you!
504
00:25:12,120 --> 00:25:14,000
[Tony] Well, one of us
has got to die first.
505
00:25:15,000 --> 00:25:18,000
-What, so it might as well be me?
-[Tony] I'll drink to that!
506
00:25:18,080 --> 00:25:21,280
Oh, right. OK. Cheers.
This is to me dying first.
507
00:25:21,360 --> 00:25:23,800
-[Tony] Cheers!
-Cheers. [Lisa laughs]
508
00:25:28,440 --> 00:25:29,480
[sniffles]