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‪NETFLIX 影集

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‪他站在門口

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‪說要幫我這樣弱勢的人進行安檢

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‪妳有叫他拿證件嗎？

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‪沒有，他有制服、工程帽，一應俱全

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‪-我是不是很傻？
‪-不會，一點也不

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‪接著他走進來

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‪我幫他泡了杯茶

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‪他問起我的防盜警報器
‪我跟他說沒有

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‪門上有鎖

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‪他很有說服力，真有兩把刷子

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‪接著他問我珠寶和貴重物品放哪

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‪我說我沒有值錢的東西

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‪但這兩年用退休金存了一點私房錢

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‪在餅乾罐裡放了大概五百英鎊

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‪他要我給他看，我就照做了

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‪他說：“真聰明
‪他們可能不會看裡面”

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‪接著我們回到客廳

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‪他向我借廁所
‪他一定進來這，然後…

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‪-好，妳有保險嗎？
‪-沒有

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‪就算他們抓到他，錢也拿不回來

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‪他可能拿去買毒品了

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‪大概吧

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‪妳有報警嗎？

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‪有，他們證實他不是警察

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‪因為他們說警察的額頭

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‪不會有“英國製”的刺青

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‪-他的額頭刺著“英國製”？
‪-對

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‪-拍張照
‪-好

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‪我好笨

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‪妳不笨

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‪-這世界很亂
‪-笑一個

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‪人生真不公平，對吧？

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‪老人家不該因為被爛人騙而覺得羞恥

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‪（禮品）

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‪我進去買個東西

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‪-好，再見
‪-再見

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‪（秋葉安老院）

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‪我幫你買了棋盤組，爸

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‪-你還記得
‪-我們總有一人要

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‪-要怎樣？
‪-記得

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‪記得什麼？

43
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‪真要命

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‪-妳好嗎？
‪-還行

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‪今天是我的生日

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‪真的嗎？妳沒先跟我說

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‪-這沒什麼
‪-晚點要去喝一杯嗎？

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‪你不用麻煩了

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‪怎樣？妳是我的戒酒輔導員？

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‪好啊，如果你不忙的話

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‪我沒忙過，妳看

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‪棋盤無隔閡

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‪安靜點，我努力要專心

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‪不行，那邊有人了

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‪不行…

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‪-這樣比較好嗎？開心嗎？
‪-對

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‪換你了

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‪該你走了

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‪我可能會從這個開始

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‪真是太荒謬了

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‪好，靠過來，安靜點
‪我們全都到齊了

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‪坦伯里市集，盛大舉行

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‪我會主持整場活動

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‪我戲服什麼的都有，皮褲和鞭子

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‪-你要扮什麼？
‪-奴隸販子

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‪這行以前在這裡很興盛

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‪我們有個設施，上面有靶

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‪用球打中靶，女巫就會掉進水裡

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‪女巫由阿瓊來當，對吧？

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‪對，我最愛女巫

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‪現在我們要徵求志工

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‪要被人砸番茄、爛雞蛋之類的東西

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‪-詹姆士
‪-不要，我不願意

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‪這是為了慈善

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‪對，但這大家都行，我是專業表演者

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‪真是的

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‪對，專業的表演者，那你要扮什麼？

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‪一定要是幾百年前的經典角色

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‪-小山丘如何？
‪-好極了

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‪小山丘是什麼？

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‪不是很傳統的東西嗎？我不知道

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‪-就像一座小山
‪-我要怎麼扮山？

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‪我們讓你躺下，蓋上泥土和草皮

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‪上面灑上小花

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‪周圍放幾朵可愛的小花，這樣很好看

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‪然後大家會走經過說
‪“你看，有小山丘耶”

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‪去你的，我才不要扮什麼山丘

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‪注意措辭

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‪不行，你竟然想要我扮一座山

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‪你應該是我的經紀人

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‪我知道你無法幫我找到真正的工作
‪這很顯然不可能

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‪但說出你要在
‪大庭廣眾之下用土埋我？

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‪太扯了

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‪抱歉大家要聽到這個
‪他目前就像野牛一樣

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‪-他便秘
‪-不要找藉口

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‪而且你錯了，詹姆士

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‪因為我已經幫你找到工作了

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‪-我本來晚一點要跟你說
‪-好，什麼工作？

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‪你有看《無望拍拖族》這節目嗎？

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‪沒有，那是什麼？

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‪大家去約會，看合不合得來，真溫馨

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‪實境秀？

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‪對，但棒極了

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‪這不是專業表演工作吧？

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‪這就是巧妙的地方

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‪因為這節目是給沒辦法約會的人

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‪因為身上有殘疾、毀容之類的

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‪-我哪裡符合條件？
‪-我跟劇組說你的身型

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‪-我想也是
‪-但那樣還不夠

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‪於是我說…

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‪“他有智力障礙”

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‪去你的

113
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‪怎樣啦？

114
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‪我不要去什麼約會實境秀，裝智障

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‪只因為你沒辦法幫我找到工作

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‪我吵不贏，是吧？這就是工作

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‪這不是工作

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‪這是假裝殘障

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‪-演戲就是假裝
‪-你說我有什麼毛病？

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‪我沒有說細節吧？
‪這是每個演員的夢想

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‪看看丹尼爾戴路易斯的《我的左腳》
‪真要命，他有什麼毛病嗎？

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‪-不知道
‪-沒人在意

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‪《雨人》，那個小笨蛋在幹嘛？

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‪演戲沒這麼難

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‪-算了
‪-你是演員

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‪算了，這樣太過份了，你太過份了

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‪我去

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‪你的情況不同，布萊恩
‪你真的有點瘋瘋的

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‪有道理

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{\an8}‪（《坦伯里報章》）

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‪我有凱絲的包裹

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‪我來簽收

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‪要的話，我可以簽

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‪-沒關係，我簽好了
‪-我是凱絲

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‪你騎摩托車來嗎？

136
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‪沒有，我只是搭公車會緊張

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‪-很好笑
‪-我騎本田

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‪好，很好笑

139
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‪-妳是記者？
‪-是我活該

140
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‪怎麼說？

141
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‪沒什麼

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‪對，記者

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‪我賣的是新聞旁邊的廣告

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‪對，工時很長

145
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‪但是報酬豐厚

146
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‪而且我不介意熬夜，因為我單身

147
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‪年輕、自由而且單身

148
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‪-要去喝杯東西嗎？
‪-好啊，麻煩你

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‪大家好

150
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‪-妳好嗎？
‪-你好

151
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‪-我帶蛋糕來給你，親愛的
‪-謝謝

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‪-減肥破功了
‪-對

153
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‪很快就穿不下你的婚禮西裝了

154
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‪我沒差，反正婚紗自己做
‪尺寸做大一點就好

155
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‪妳要自己做婚紗？

156
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‪-對，很省錢吧？
‪-太悲哀了

157
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‪怎麼會？

158
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‪人生中最重要的一天錢卻不夠

159
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‪我的錢夠用，幾乎不太需要

160
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‪有愛就不需要錢，那只是婚紗

161
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‪-錢或愛我都沒有
‪-大家都愛妳，親愛的

162
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‪那我呢？

163
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‪每個人都有自己的對象

164
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‪我跟老師約會過，他以為我很笨

165
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‪把我當傻瓜唸詩給我聽，批評吉卜林

166
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‪我喜歡吉卜林的蛋糕，婚禮一定要有

167
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‪希望這樣能安慰妳
‪說不定他假裝以為妳很笨

168
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‪因為他不喜歡妳

169
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‪-他喜不喜歡妳，妳會知道
‪-怎麼看？

170
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‪感覺得到，他不只有禮貌
‪還很體貼又會照顧人

171
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‪表現出有意思，也不只是客套

172
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‪有一股他忍耐不住的暖意

173
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‪帶著微笑看著妳，摸他的頭髮

174
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‪幫妳撿東西，不是只說妳東西掉了

175
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‪希望妳的手更靠近

176
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‪所以下次約會

177
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‪看對方有沒有微笑
‪摸頭髮、幫妳撿掉落的洋芋片

178
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‪蘭尼把壽險的事都跟我說了

179
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‪好

180
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‪他沒有領出來
‪因為他不想要用在這種情況

181
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‪天啊，好浪漫

182
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‪沒錯，但錢不是莉莎的象徵，親愛的

183
00:08:53,640 --> 00:08:55,600
‪錢只是花費的表徵

184
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‪莉莎是你共度一生的美人

185
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‪她住在你的心裡

186
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‪她買了壽險，好讓你無憂無慮

187
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‪至少從壽險公司那領出來，好好享受

188
00:09:12,560 --> 00:09:14,520
‪有必要的話就在賭場輸個精光

189
00:09:16,320 --> 00:09:17,880
‪但要是你不拿來用

190
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‪等於莉莎浪費了時間

191
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‪我要你好好過活，東尼

192
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‪不只是不自殺，或耐心等死

193
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‪過生活

194
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‪活得淋漓盡致，彷彿沒有明日

195
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‪你醒來發現還有明天，那就再來一次

196
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‪不管你要做什麼，只要你過得充實

197
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‪享受每分每秒

198
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‪如果你不覺得這值得一試
‪我又何必試？

199
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‪我以前每天都坐在這張長椅上

200
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‪自己一個人

201
00:10:05,880 --> 00:10:09,080
‪希望有個人出現，能體會我的心情

202
00:10:10,880 --> 00:10:11,840
‪結果你來了

203
00:10:14,520 --> 00:10:17,280
‪你跟我在同一艘船上，你失去了摯愛

204
00:10:18,280 --> 00:10:21,240
‪這裡是墓地，機率很…

205
00:10:24,560 --> 00:10:27,120
‪看吧，你還是會思考、傾聽、逗人笑

206
00:10:27,200 --> 00:10:30,240
‪讓人覺得自己有價值，值得被傾聽

207
00:10:31,040 --> 00:10:35,280
‪我只希望你找到某樣東西
‪讓你能在早上想起床

208
00:10:35,360 --> 00:10:36,480
‪我依然這麼做

209
00:10:37,600 --> 00:10:41,600
‪我知道我永遠不會取代斯坦
‪但我不會舉白旗投降

210
00:10:41,680 --> 00:10:46,240
‪現在唯一讓我擔心的是你不開心

211
00:10:47,720 --> 00:10:48,960
‪重點在於抱持希望

212
00:10:51,280 --> 00:10:52,280
‪你可以

213
00:10:53,960 --> 00:10:57,160
‪想念莉莎、哀悼、生氣

214
00:11:00,400 --> 00:11:03,000
‪但想到你不抱持希望就讓我受不了

215
00:11:06,960 --> 00:11:09,080
‪這對我來說是世上最悲哀的事

216
00:11:11,000 --> 00:11:11,840
‪讓步吧

217
00:11:14,600 --> 00:11:15,640
‪拜託你

218
00:11:17,600 --> 00:11:18,920
‪告訴我你有希望

219
00:11:20,160 --> 00:11:21,000
‪我有

220
00:11:23,200 --> 00:11:24,040
‪可是

221
00:11:25,720 --> 00:11:28,040
‪我永遠也找不到別人取代莉莎

222
00:11:29,640 --> 00:11:30,840
‪我發現我…

223
00:11:31,480 --> 00:11:32,440
‪不想這麼做

224
00:11:34,560 --> 00:11:36,880
‪但我確實找到活下去的原因

225
00:11:39,960 --> 00:11:41,400
‪這並非不可能

226
00:11:48,760 --> 00:11:51,040
‪天啊，你手腳很快，對吧？

227
00:11:53,120 --> 00:11:54,160
‪什麼意思？

228
00:11:54,240 --> 00:11:57,080
‪一認識就邀人喝東西

229
00:11:59,600 --> 00:12:01,480
‪我以為這是妳想要我說的

230
00:12:03,480 --> 00:12:04,480
‪對

231
00:12:13,800 --> 00:12:14,640
‪糟糕

232
00:12:18,520 --> 00:12:19,720
‪妳有帕金森氏症嗎？

233
00:12:26,280 --> 00:12:27,120
‪沒有

234
00:12:40,960 --> 00:12:42,320
‪-艾瑪？
‪-什麼事？

235
00:12:43,120 --> 00:12:44,360
‪我是傑克

236
00:12:44,440 --> 00:12:47,240
‪傑克，那個傑克，天啊

237
00:12:47,880 --> 00:12:51,120
‪-真不好意思，好久不見
‪-對

238
00:12:51,200 --> 00:12:52,920
‪30年了，對

239
00:12:53,000 --> 00:12:55,120
‪你看，我以前還有頭髮

240
00:12:55,200 --> 00:12:57,160
‪-對
‪-是啊

241
00:12:58,200 --> 00:12:59,480
‪所以妳好嗎？

242
00:12:59,560 --> 00:13:01,560
‪很好，你知道…

243
00:13:01,640 --> 00:13:02,560
‪對

244
00:13:02,640 --> 00:13:06,120
‪-結婚了？有小孩什麼的嗎？
‪-通通沒有

245
00:13:06,760 --> 00:13:07,760
‪你呢？你是不是…

246
00:13:07,840 --> 00:13:09,880
‪我？沒有，我離婚了

247
00:13:09,960 --> 00:13:12,120
‪沒小孩，完全是個廢物

248
00:13:14,360 --> 00:13:15,840
‪妳從事哪一行？

249
00:13:15,920 --> 00:13:17,720
‪我在養老院當護理師

250
00:13:18,960 --> 00:13:19,800
‪太好了

251
00:13:20,320 --> 00:13:21,160
‪你呢？

252
00:13:21,240 --> 00:13:22,440
‪我進口葡萄酒

253
00:13:22,520 --> 00:13:23,840
‪太好了

254
00:13:25,920 --> 00:13:26,840
‪我們應該敘個舊

255
00:13:28,640 --> 00:13:31,000
‪放心，給妳我的電話

256
00:13:31,080 --> 00:13:33,600
‪-好了，這是我的號碼
‪-謝了

257
00:13:34,600 --> 00:13:37,520
‪-很高興再次見到妳
‪-我也是

258
00:13:45,080 --> 00:13:47,600
‪（坦伯里壁球俱樂部）

259
00:13:47,680 --> 00:13:48,520
‪好

260
00:13:49,480 --> 00:13:51,400
‪你不能在打壁球前喝啤酒

261
00:13:51,480 --> 00:13:52,800
‪當然可以，走吧

262
00:13:53,480 --> 00:13:55,880
‪-你要帶酒進去？
‪-渴了可以喝

263
00:13:55,960 --> 00:13:56,800
‪太誇張了

264
00:13:58,760 --> 00:13:59,800
‪天啊…妳好

265
00:14:00,440 --> 00:14:03,400
‪-妳好
‪-好臭，我的天啊

266
00:14:05,480 --> 00:14:06,320
‪好

267
00:14:11,840 --> 00:14:12,960
‪-準備好了嗎？
‪-好了

268
00:14:14,040 --> 00:14:15,520
‪-零比零
‪-奶子

269
00:14:15,600 --> 00:14:16,480
‪好，重賽

270
00:14:16,560 --> 00:14:17,680
‪-是那個…
‪-重賽

271
00:14:17,760 --> 00:14:19,640
‪你不能在別人發球時大喊“奶子”

272
00:14:19,720 --> 00:14:21,480
‪-如果我有妥瑞氏症呢？
‪-你…

273
00:14:23,760 --> 00:14:24,840
‪這樣很多事都說得通

274
00:14:28,120 --> 00:14:29,520
‪別鬧了

275
00:14:31,160 --> 00:14:33,200
‪來啊

276
00:14:36,520 --> 00:14:38,000
‪你怎麼辦到的？

277
00:14:40,040 --> 00:14:41,800
‪你連跑都沒跑就累了？

278
00:14:41,880 --> 00:14:43,040
‪我要繞過你

279
00:14:43,120 --> 00:14:44,640
‪-對
‪-很遠

280
00:14:45,200 --> 00:14:46,160
‪不要，你怎麼能…

281
00:14:46,240 --> 00:14:47,960
‪-天啊
‪-算你衰

282
00:14:48,040 --> 00:14:49,640
‪不要

283
00:14:49,720 --> 00:14:51,200
‪快點跑啊

284
00:14:51,280 --> 00:14:53,160
‪算你衰

285
00:14:54,680 --> 00:14:57,600
‪-你可以…
‪-算你衰

286
00:14:58,360 --> 00:15:00,120
‪算你衰

287
00:15:03,440 --> 00:15:05,840
‪-可以別再吼了嗎？
‪-算你衰

288
00:15:05,920 --> 00:15:07,960
‪這就像跟野豬打球

289
00:15:11,840 --> 00:15:14,600
‪-為什麼不去追球？
‪-我不知道球要滾到哪，我有在追

290
00:15:14,680 --> 00:15:16,880
‪好，我跟你說我要打哪

291
00:15:16,960 --> 00:15:18,920
‪下面，在那邊

292
00:15:19,000 --> 00:15:20,040
‪在那邊

293
00:15:20,600 --> 00:15:21,920
‪算你衰

294
00:15:22,000 --> 00:15:23,080
‪小心牆

295
00:15:23,160 --> 00:15:24,640
‪快點，就在那

296
00:15:24,720 --> 00:15:26,760
‪-這樣有幫助嗎？
‪-沒有

297
00:15:26,840 --> 00:15:28,520
‪-好
‪-假設什麼都幫不上忙

298
00:15:28,600 --> 00:15:29,640
‪-好
‪-別吵就好

299
00:15:31,040 --> 00:15:31,920
‪太誇張了

300
00:15:36,120 --> 00:15:38,200
‪-好
‪-不是有氣泡嗎？

301
00:15:38,280 --> 00:15:39,120
‪有嗎？

302
00:15:40,080 --> 00:15:41,120
‪天啊

303
00:15:42,840 --> 00:15:43,880
‪操

304
00:15:43,960 --> 00:15:45,480
‪-我想吐
‪-噁心死了

305
00:15:46,200 --> 00:15:47,600
‪天啊，不要這樣

306
00:15:48,240 --> 00:15:49,400
‪天啊

307
00:15:53,200 --> 00:15:54,880
‪-太噁心了
‪-什麼東西？

308
00:15:54,960 --> 00:15:56,160
‪你還問我？

309
00:15:56,240 --> 00:15:57,080
‪你剛…

310
00:15:57,600 --> 00:15:59,000
‪別踩到跌倒

311
00:15:59,080 --> 00:16:02,960
‪你吐在球場上
‪我要怎麼不踩到跌倒？

312
00:16:03,480 --> 00:16:04,320
‪說真的，這…

313
00:16:05,360 --> 00:16:06,280
‪這…

314
00:16:08,000 --> 00:16:09,080
‪怎麼了？

315
00:16:10,920 --> 00:16:11,760
‪深呼吸

316
00:16:13,960 --> 00:16:15,160
‪糟了

317
00:16:16,080 --> 00:16:16,920
‪糟了

318
00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:18,400
‪糟了

319
00:16:22,320 --> 00:16:23,240
‪說吧

320
00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:24,840
‪說什麼？

321
00:16:25,400 --> 00:16:26,240
‪笑我

322
00:16:27,160 --> 00:16:28,240
‪我為什麼要笑？

323
00:16:31,760 --> 00:16:34,840
‪這沒什麼，只是小小的警告，我沒事

324
00:16:36,400 --> 00:16:38,760
‪-我的心臟怎麼會比你弱？
‪-你這很典型

325
00:16:39,520 --> 00:16:41,320
‪-你太壓抑了
‪-我太壓抑？

326
00:16:41,400 --> 00:16:43,240
‪你老是氣憤難耐

327
00:16:43,320 --> 00:16:45,800
‪冷靜點，深呼吸

328
00:16:45,880 --> 00:16:47,520
‪對，很好笑

329
00:16:48,560 --> 00:16:51,520
‪你跟我有一樣的壓力和怒氣

330
00:16:51,600 --> 00:16:54,480
‪但我會對人大吼
‪罵他們髒話、砸東西

331
00:16:55,080 --> 00:16:57,680
‪你全放在心裡，一定要有地方宣洩

332
00:16:59,400 --> 00:17:00,240
‪這不公平

333
00:17:02,280 --> 00:17:04,080
‪沒錯，人生就是不公平

334
00:17:04,880 --> 00:17:06,120
‪然後你就掛了

335
00:17:06,720 --> 00:17:09,120
‪我不抽煙，注意飲食

336
00:17:09,200 --> 00:17:11,760
‪我做瑜珈、彼拉提斯、伸展

337
00:17:13,120 --> 00:17:14,840
‪-幾乎不喝酒
‪-沒錯

338
00:17:14,920 --> 00:17:17,880
‪這就是這一切的懲罰

339
00:17:19,080 --> 00:17:23,760
‪說真的，你不需要一肩扛起所有重擔

340
00:17:23,840 --> 00:17:26,720
‪老想著要取悅別人

341
00:17:26,800 --> 00:17:30,280
‪你偶爾叫他們滾開也沒關係

342
00:17:30,800 --> 00:17:32,200
‪你事事操心

343
00:17:33,240 --> 00:17:36,800
‪工作、家庭、社交場合

344
00:17:37,520 --> 00:17:38,680
‪你擔心我

345
00:17:39,400 --> 00:17:44,000
‪這一切都是為了幫助我
‪結果你落得什麼下場

346
00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:50,080
‪莉莎之死，所有的同情都落在我身上

347
00:17:52,720 --> 00:17:54,160
‪她是你的姊姊

348
00:17:55,920 --> 00:17:58,480
‪你因為我而無法讓自己情緒潰堤

349
00:17:58,560 --> 00:18:01,720
‪你不讓自己哀悼
‪因為你擔心我接下來的舉動

350
00:18:01,800 --> 00:18:02,640
‪所以…

351
00:18:05,040 --> 00:18:06,160
‪感謝你

352
00:18:08,840 --> 00:18:11,600
‪你在運動這方面簡直弱爆了

353
00:18:11,680 --> 00:18:13,000
‪要開始了，很好

354
00:18:14,640 --> 00:18:17,920
‪謝謝你好言相勸，東尼
‪我大概數到三句吧

355
00:18:18,520 --> 00:18:21,160
‪幸好我們只是姻親

356
00:18:21,240 --> 00:18:22,560
‪要不然我會覺得很丟臉

357
00:18:22,640 --> 00:18:26,680
‪居然跟這種遜咖共享同樣的基因

358
00:18:26,760 --> 00:18:28,080
‪太好了，還真有幫助

359
00:18:28,160 --> 00:18:31,160
‪我們要訓練你，懂我意思嗎？

360
00:18:31,240 --> 00:18:32,640
‪但要小心謹慎進行

361
00:18:32,720 --> 00:18:37,920
‪壁球對現在醫學
‪認定的“弱小”來說太危險

362
00:18:39,440 --> 00:18:41,840
‪我們先從插花開始

363
00:18:41,920 --> 00:18:43,880
‪再一路前進到跳房子遊戲

364
00:18:43,960 --> 00:18:48,200
‪-你之後會留著洋裝嗎？
‪-這不是洋裝，這叫病人袍

365
00:18:48,280 --> 00:18:50,600
‪長袍就是洋裝，是小女孩的洋裝

366
00:18:50,680 --> 00:18:52,920
‪他們以為你喜歡穿這樣

367
00:18:53,000 --> 00:18:55,200
‪你要再讓我心臟病發嗎？

368
00:18:55,280 --> 00:18:57,800
‪如果你繼續激怒我，這就是謀殺

369
00:18:57,880 --> 00:19:00,000
‪他們說：“病人是女的吧？
‪看一下生殖器吧”

370
00:19:00,080 --> 00:19:01,240
‪還是看不出來

371
00:19:01,320 --> 00:19:03,720
‪給他穿洋裝吧
‪他們有幫你做子宮頸抹片檢查嗎？

372
00:19:03,800 --> 00:19:06,080
‪他們來的時候不如順便做

373
00:19:06,160 --> 00:19:10,280
‪-他們要做所有檢測，因為…
‪-你可以…我才剛心臟病發

374
00:19:10,360 --> 00:19:12,600
‪-不要再給我壓力了
‪-冷靜下來

375
00:19:12,680 --> 00:19:16,160
‪冷靜？如果我再發作，那就是你害的

376
00:19:16,240 --> 00:19:17,160
‪你真過份，女士

377
00:19:18,080 --> 00:19:21,080
‪-你沒別的地方可去？
‪-其實有

378
00:19:21,160 --> 00:19:23,640
‪-很好
‪-我要去喝一杯

379
00:19:23,720 --> 00:19:26,600
‪我還是可以喝
‪我的心臟很好，可以享樂

380
00:19:26,680 --> 00:19:27,920
‪好，明天見

381
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:30,480
‪-希望不要
‪-烏鴉嘴，別這麼說

382
00:19:33,120 --> 00:19:34,160
‪再見

383
00:19:45,920 --> 00:19:47,280
‪你看起來不開心，小子

384
00:19:48,760 --> 00:19:49,600
‪對

385
00:19:50,720 --> 00:19:53,400
‪需要經驗老道的人給你指點迷津嗎？

386
00:19:55,840 --> 00:20:00,200
‪我沒辦法進演藝圈
‪我這種人就是沒辦法

387
00:20:00,280 --> 00:20:01,720
‪-胖子嗎？
‪-不是

388
00:20:02,560 --> 00:20:05,240
‪我是說住在小鎮的凡夫俗子

389
00:20:05,320 --> 00:20:08,120
‪請到世上最爛的經紀人
‪他眼中的絕世好機會

390
00:20:08,200 --> 00:20:10,440
‪竟然是在實境秀裝殘障

391
00:20:10,960 --> 00:20:11,920
‪你這樣說可能沒錯

392
00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:13,920
‪這可是頭一遭

393
00:20:14,920 --> 00:20:17,600
‪-希望我說錯了
‪-你很精闢，孩子

394
00:20:19,040 --> 00:20:20,120
‪不過誰會在意？

395
00:20:21,840 --> 00:20:23,600
‪你要的東西這裡都有了

396
00:20:24,120 --> 00:20:25,560
‪坦伯里是很迷人的小鎮

397
00:20:27,480 --> 00:20:28,840
‪工作輕鬆，媽媽人好

398
00:20:29,640 --> 00:20:32,080
‪-朋友好心，你
‪-同一句話回敬你

399
00:20:33,400 --> 00:20:35,240
‪來吧

400
00:20:36,600 --> 00:20:38,360
‪何必當不真實的想紅明星呢？

401
00:20:41,360 --> 00:20:42,920
‪娛樂圈最娛樂，不是嗎？

402
00:20:44,320 --> 00:20:45,520
‪全都是變態戀童癖

403
00:20:47,880 --> 00:20:49,240
‪我了解實際情況

404
00:20:49,920 --> 00:20:54,400
‪你想說出了名，大家就會更尊敬你

405
00:20:55,920 --> 00:20:57,160
‪大概是吧

406
00:20:58,000 --> 00:21:00,440
‪對某些人有用
‪但你是我們這種標準窩囊廢

407
00:21:01,480 --> 00:21:03,600
‪一旦紅過了，你會更慘

408
00:21:04,120 --> 00:21:07,920
‪因為現在你是廢物，但世人並不知道

409
00:21:09,280 --> 00:21:10,480
‪有道理

410
00:21:11,320 --> 00:21:13,400
‪你不需要陌生人喜歡你

411
00:21:14,240 --> 00:21:16,360
‪有人喜歡你真實的樣子

412
00:21:16,960 --> 00:21:17,840
‪對

413
00:21:19,560 --> 00:21:22,560
‪媽媽說不愛自己的人
‪無法期待別人愛你

414
00:21:24,280 --> 00:21:26,160
‪-你媽很有智慧
‪-對

415
00:21:34,320 --> 00:21:35,560
‪如果不是有蘭尼

416
00:21:35,640 --> 00:21:38,760
‪我會粗暴地與她交媾

417
00:21:41,520 --> 00:21:42,560
‪小子？

418
00:21:44,920 --> 00:21:46,840
‪-敬你，夥伴
‪-好，我很愛你

419
00:21:47,360 --> 00:21:48,640
‪-我也是
‪-好

420
00:21:59,760 --> 00:22:00,680
‪真要命

421
00:22:01,280 --> 00:22:03,240
‪-怎麼了？
‪-這讓人很沮喪，對不對？

422
00:22:05,720 --> 00:22:06,600
‪我沒差

423
00:22:07,680 --> 00:22:10,520
‪我每天都跟孤單老人一起工作

424
00:22:10,600 --> 00:22:13,560
‪我好像可以誠懇地說

425
00:22:13,640 --> 00:22:16,360
‪他們可能比我還快樂

426
00:22:16,440 --> 00:22:18,760
‪不是，抱歉，這樣聽起來很可悲嗎？

427
00:22:18,840 --> 00:22:20,480
‪不會，很好笑

428
00:22:20,560 --> 00:22:23,800
‪超時加班、大家休假時替補的都是我

429
00:22:23,880 --> 00:22:27,120
‪因為我覺得上班沮喪的程度

430
00:22:27,840 --> 00:22:29,280
‪會比自己待在家來得小

431
00:22:29,360 --> 00:22:33,000
‪然後你的出現就像一股清風

432
00:22:34,000 --> 00:22:34,840
‪抱歉

433
00:22:36,520 --> 00:22:38,400
‪我知道你還愛著莉莎

434
00:22:38,480 --> 00:22:41,080
‪我很清楚，我也知道你會永遠愛下去

435
00:22:41,640 --> 00:22:44,880
‪我想這大概是我還能坐在這…

436
00:22:46,720 --> 00:22:48,560
‪向你掏心掏肺的原因

437
00:22:48,640 --> 00:22:51,000
‪不會有奇怪的感覺或…

438
00:22:51,080 --> 00:22:52,240
‪-沒錯
‪-對

439
00:22:53,920 --> 00:22:56,720
‪-我在想我浪費了人生
‪-妳沒有

440
00:22:57,840 --> 00:23:00,280
‪我知道這不是要你在乎的原因

441
00:23:00,360 --> 00:23:01,360
‪我確實在乎

442
00:23:01,440 --> 00:23:04,320
‪不是，我知道你在乎
‪但不是那種在乎

443
00:23:05,000 --> 00:23:08,520
‪我只是覺得這不會是
‪你跟我在一起的原因

444
00:23:09,080 --> 00:23:10,080
‪我知道

445
00:23:11,240 --> 00:23:12,520
‪但我確實在乎妳

446
00:23:13,120 --> 00:23:14,720
‪我也想要妳快樂

447
00:23:21,520 --> 00:23:26,600
‪我今天碰到以前的老情人

448
00:23:29,000 --> 00:23:29,880
‪誰？

449
00:23:30,560 --> 00:23:34,400
‪我的大學同學
‪明顯是很久以前的事了

450
00:23:35,000 --> 00:23:39,240
‪他離開去闖事業，我留在這忙我的事

451
00:23:40,920 --> 00:23:41,760
‪總之

452
00:23:42,840 --> 00:23:45,480
‪他說我們應該敘個舊

453
00:23:46,600 --> 00:23:47,440
‪所以…

454
00:23:49,800 --> 00:23:50,880
‪妳應該去

455
00:23:50,960 --> 00:23:52,560
‪是嗎？要嗎？

456
00:23:54,800 --> 00:23:55,640
‪一定要

457
00:24:00,640 --> 00:24:02,000
‪我希望妳過得快樂

458
00:24:02,680 --> 00:24:03,560
‪跟我以前一樣

459
00:24:06,320 --> 00:24:07,760
‪很高興你好多了

460
00:24:10,960 --> 00:24:11,960
‪我知道，還有…

461
00:24:14,600 --> 00:24:15,560
‪生日快樂

462
00:24:15,640 --> 00:24:16,640
‪謝謝

463
00:24:19,120 --> 00:24:20,400
‪-乾杯
‪-嘿

464
00:24:20,480 --> 00:24:21,320
‪嘿

465
00:24:22,440 --> 00:24:24,360
‪-靠
‪-熱絡點了，對吧？

466
00:24:32,680 --> 00:24:33,600
‪乖孩子

467
00:24:34,240 --> 00:24:35,200
‪妳好

468
00:24:35,280 --> 00:24:36,160
‪過來

469
00:25:39,240 --> 00:25:40,160
‪對

470
00:25:40,720 --> 00:25:42,440
‪-別吵牠
‪-我不會

471
00:26:41,440 --> 00:26:42,800
‪字幕翻譯：林佩孜