[Sam] In 1910, Robert Falcon Scott set out to become the first person
to reach the South Pole.
A year and a half later, he arrived, only to discover
that Roald Amundsen had beat him by 34 days.
And if that weren't bad enough, on the journey home,
Scott and his entire team froze to death on the punishing tundra.
You asked me what this makes me think of?
That's what it makes me think of...
freezing to death under the night sky.
I want you to take me to Winter Formal.
-What? -Think about how much fun
we would have with all the music
and dancing and wearing fancy clothes.
Those are three of my least favorite things.
Oh, and raisins, because I don't like to eat things with wrinkles.
Okay, but, Sam, this is really important to me.
I've never been to a dance with a date that wasn't a relative,
and now I have a boyfriend.
It's like the stars have aligned for us, you know?
I guess I could sit in the hallway
outside of the gym with my headphones on until it's over.
I'll bring a Ziploc full of crackers in case I get hungry.
What? No, that's boring.
Not to me. I like crackers.
Did you know that Ritz Crackers have seven holes
so that they don't get air bubbles during baking?
You know, my parents are gonna be out of town that night.
So I was thinking that maybe afterwards, you could...
come over?
Why would I want to go to your house? You have terrible snacks.
Plus, I'll probably be tired and ready for bed.
Come on, Sam. What do I have to do to get you to go to the dance?
If you ask them to turn the music off so that it was silent, that would be nice.
[chuckles] A dance without music.
A dance without music would be a dance without people.
That sounds pretty good, too.
[rock music playing]
♪ It took all my imagination ♪
♪ Just to make a bit of observation ♪
♪ And if I'm not you and you're not me ♪
♪ Who the hell we're supposed to be ♪
♪ Now get on ♪
[lighter sparking]
What?
It's the middle of the day.
[laughs]
So?
So you're using drugs in the middle of the day.
It's pot. It's not drugs.
Ah.
-You want a hit? -Oh. Um, I-I can't.
Ah, come on. Have some fun.
You deserve it.
I do?
More than anyone I know.
Oh, I can't. What if somebody needs me?
Do they?
[rock music playing]
♪ Lovestruck ♪
♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh ♪
♪ You're lovestruck ♪
Elsa Gardner, you dirty dog.
Hey, April.
Look at you, shopping for lingerie. Is Doug the luckiest guy ever or what?
[chuckles]
Barry hasn't touched me in months.
Not that I want him to, fat piece of shit.
How are you?
I'm good.
Yeah, well, you certainly are.
You're glowing. What's your secret?
I don't have a secret.
I'm just... you know, I'm an open book.
Yeah, so...
Hmm.
What are you doing in this neighborhood?
-I'm sorry? -Well, you don't--
you don't live anywhere near here.
It's awfully far to come.
A sale.
Oh.
They're having 40% off.
I have to get Casey so many white shirts, you know, for her Clayton uniform.
You wouldn't believe how many white shirts. I couldn't resist 40% off.
-Clayton Prep? -Mm-hmm.
Wow. Uh, well... well, that's... that's big news.
It's not a sure thing. I mean, she hasn't even gotten in yet.
I'm just jumping the gun 'cause of the sale and...
Well, I should... I should run.
Okay.
-Bye. -Bye.
Hey, this is Miles. You know what to do.
[beeps]
Hey, it's me.
I'm calling to say
in case you were thinking of calling me, don't.
I am much happier
since you left suddenly, with no warning.
I am great.
And even though you managed to take the TV,
you left a bunch of other stuff that I don't want:
your humidifier, your panini press,
like, 15 kinds of hair gel.
You should probably come and get it.
Your hair looks kind of thin without product in it.
Anyway, I'll just leave it all outside.
Hope it doesn't rain. Don't call.
Ow!
I'm fine. Goodbye.
[chattering]
[laughing]
What's up? What are we talking about?
Hope it's the lacrosse team getting their eyebrows pierced; that's hilarious.
We got to go. Come on.
That was weird. What's up with them?
[JJ] Sharice, let's go!
Sharice!
-What the hell? -They're upset you're leaving for Clayton.
How did they know about Clayton?
No clue, but I've been getting e-mails
all day from the mothers asking if we're still going
to make it to the finals without you. Spoiler alert... nope.
Anyway, just try to take it as a compliment.
Yeah.
Totally feels like a compliment.
I can't find my work pants.
You know where my work pants are?
They're folded in a pile on the bed.
Okay.
What, are you still mad at me?
What, for having so much shame about Sam's autism
that you never mentioned it at work?
-Yep. -Good to know.
[door slams]
Oh, that's nice. Do you want to talk, honey?
Nope, I don't.
The track team is freezing me out, and it's your fault.
Um, how is it my fault?
-You blabbed to JJ's mom about Clayton. -April?
-Did I? I ran into April at the mall. -Uh-huh.
-I don't know if... I can't remember... -Mom?
Okay, I mentioned Clayton.
Now the girls are pissed at me for betraying the team.
And I'm probably not gonna get into Clayton anyway.
Why wouldn't you get in? Wait, Casey, I'm sorry. I didn't know it was a secret.
I will try and smooth things over with the other moms.
-No, Mom, don't call anyone. -Okay, I won't. Maybe just April.
-Mom! -Okay!
[thuds] Ow.
Paige is making me go with her to the Winter Formal Dance at school.
Sounds dumb.
That sucks.
And after, she wants me to come over to her house
because her parents are at a wedding in Pittsburgh.
Back up.
Paige's parents are gonna be gone, and she wants you to "come over"?
-Yes. -Dude, that's awesome.
-Why? -Because it means she wants to get down.
Sex, dude.
I-I don't think so.
Paige didn't say anything about having sex.
Well, of course she didn't say anything.
Girls don't say stuff like that. They use code words.
I'm telling you, "come over" is lady talk for "have sex."
I'm still skeptical.
Trust me, she wants to take the D-Train to Bonetown.
Sex again. Just always assume I mean sex.
-I'm gonna ask her. -Don't ask her.
-Excuse me, Paige? -Mm-hmm?
When you said that I should come over after the dance,
did you really mean have sex?
Uh, uh, maybe.
She said maybe.
In this case, maybe means yes.
-I'm gonna ask her. -Don't ask her, dude.
When you said maybe, did you mean yes?
Yes, Sam.
She wants to have sex.
I told you, dude!
Yes, you did.
[stammering]
The proposition of sex makes the dance seem much more worthwhile.
So what are we waiting for, Cinderella?
Let's get you ready for the ball.
And by "ball," I mean balls-deep.
Knock-knock. I solved your problem. I called JJ's mom.
I specifically asked you not to call anyone.
What are you doing? Why are you lying down?
Turns out, someone made a mountain out of a molehill.
-Seriously, you're weirding me out. -The girls are not angry at you.
They're just sad that you're leaving.
No, I'm telling you, they're being assholes.
All right, whatever. Some lady you barely know
says that it's not true, you listen to her.
Um, April Turner is not someone I barely know.
We almost shared a room together at the Ramada Inn
for one of your out-of-town track meets.
And we would have, except I had a scratchy throat.
Okay, whatever. I...
I don't know why I assumed you would listen to me anyway.
April assured me that JJ's dying to hang out with you.
She said the girls are getting together to go dress shopping for the dance.
-Mnh-mnh. Pass. Mnh-mnh. -Call her.
Sweetie... listen to me.
I know teenage girls can be mean and bitchy.
I was actually like that myself sometimes.
-You? -I don't care about the other girls,
but you and Sharice are best friends.
Don't let this get between you two.
I love you.
Sam, come here.
Buying condoms is inherently embarrassing.
But you have nothing to be ashamed of.
-You-- -Hi. I need condoms to have sex.
Uh, but I like to know what I'm purchasing.
-Can you answer some questions? -Shoot.
Can I try them on before I buy?
No.
-How do I put them on? -Check the Internet?
Did you know that originally condoms were made out of leather?
I did not.
Can I return unused condoms if they don't fit, or I can't have sex?
Absolutely not.
Some of the condoms say "ribbed for her pleasure."
Is that guaranteed? And if not, is there a number I can call?
I've never been asked that before.
-Okay. Just a few more questions. -These are the ones you want.
Here you go. Just take those.
All right, Sammy. That's your ticket to ride.
You, sir, are ready to take the D-Train to Bonetown.
"Each condom is electronically tested." That's good.
[knock on door]
Come in.
Doug. Hey.
-How are you? -Good.
I wanted to return this book.
-Thanks. Hope it helped. -It did.
I appreciated the conversation we had and the book.
They both helped. You're like my personal autism school.
[laughs]
Well, happy to help.
Was there anything else?
No.
Well, actually, Elsa and I,
we haven't been speaking.
She got upset because I didn't tell one of my coworkers about Sam's autism.
That's unfair, right?
You don't want me to take sides.
No. No, actually, I do.
I'm right, right?
You know, Doug,
I love that you feel comfortable talking to me,
but lately, it seems like you might benefit
from your own relationship with a therapist.
'Cause, honestly, the more personal information we share,
the more I worry about crossing some boundary as Sam's therapist.
-I get it. -I'm happy to give you a referral.
Nah. No, thank you.
Why are you limping?
Oh, I hurt my foot the other day. It's not a big deal.
-Can you put your full weight on it? -God, no.
Have you seen a doctor?
No.
-Well, is it swollen? -A little.
Okay, a lot.
All right, come on. Let's go.
-What? -I'm gonna take you to the ER.
No, I can't. I have so much to do today, so...
Okay, I guess walking around on one foot in horrible pain is a solution?
Please, let me help you out, okay?
You did me a favor. Can I please... Can I help you out?
[Sam] Any relationship,
even friendship, can be complicated.
You can't force it.
I don't want to hang out with him. He's annoying.
It's rude to say that in front of him. He's right here.
It's okay. I don't like Sam, either.
-He's a snoozefest. -See what I'm saying?
Boys, I get my hair cut once every two years, okay?
All I ask for is 20 minutes in this kitchen,
so I can spend a few months not looking like a yeti.
What are we supposed to talk about?
Why not try and find some common interests?
Upstairs.
Bridges?
No.
Glaciers?
No.
Dirt bikes?
No. Wildlife?
Ugh.
Sex?
Yes.
I've never done it before, but I expect to soon,
after the Winter Formal Dance.
What? With who?
My girlfriend Paige.
Have you gone through the bases?
What bases?
The bases.
First base, kissing. Second base, boobs.
Third base is the privates.
And the home run? Sex.
That's the order it goes in.
My cousin works at a car wash, and he knows all about girls.
That's a fortunate resource.
You can't have sex till you visit all the bases. It's a rule.
This is where I write all the rules.
Yep.
[JJ] Oh, my God!
Casey, you have to try that on.
No.
No, no, no, no. It is so you.
I'm probably not gonna go to the dance. Evan's, like, banned from school property.
[chuckles] Try it on. Seriously.
Mm...
It's gonna look really cute on you.
Okay, fine.
[JJ] Don't keep us waiting, Casey. Is the dress on yet?
Yep.
I'm sorry, Casey.
For what?
[laughing]
Now I know it's getting late,
but we have one last order of business.
Please welcome Newton High School senior Paige Hardaway.
♪ Dream bigger ♪
♪ Dream... ♪
[Woman] Ah.
Whew! That was disorienting, wasn't it?
Well, for my boyfriend Sam,
life is always like that all the time.
Um...
You see, Sam has autism,
which makes it really difficult for him to deal with situations
where there's large groups of people and loud noises
and unpredictable lighting.
But should that mean that Sam is excluded
from really fun things,
like high school dances that his girlfriend also
really, really, really wants to go to?
No. It doesn't.
So, ladies and gentlemen,
I present to you Silent Night,
an autism-friendly dance that is 100% silent.
Let me guess, this is all your idea.
No, I don't know anything about it.
I didn't know Sam was interested in going to the dance.
And I already know what you're thinking. I mean, silent? That's crazy.
What about the music, right? Well, there is gonna be music.
It will be piped in through wireless headphones.
And I've already spoken to the people at Techtropolis,
and they are willing to donate headphones for this event,
which is super-cool of them.
So in conclusion,
I think that Newton High should be a place
that's inclusive of all students.
That's it. Thank you.
Okay, so if we're ready to vote?
Yes, April.
Hi.
[clears throat]
I made JJ an appointment, months ago, to get her hair done.
It's going to cost me about $80.
Um...
Now you want to flatten it with a bulky set of headphones.
I... I think maybe no.
Um, you know what? Um, I'm a hairdresser.
So I could do all the kids' hairdos for free, you know.
-Oh, wow, that would be wonderful, yes. -Wow!
[April] It's not just about the hair, right?
I mean, the Winter Formal
is something that our kids have looked forward to
their entire high school career.
Do we really need to change everything to accommodate one kid?
I mean, a silent dance, it's just so...
you know, it's sad.
[stammers]
[clears throat]
Well, maybe we should vote.
You know what's sad?
My son never being able to attend a school event,
because the sounds are so overwhelming.
You know, never being invited to a birthday party,
because he was the kid at Chuck E. Cheese
who couldn't stop screaming.
The isolation, the loneliness,
the lack of experience...
that's sad.
Your perfectly healthy kids not being able to get an updo,
it's just not on my list.
So...
Okay. Shall we vote?
All the ayes?
And the nays?
Well, the ayes have it.
-Silent dance, here we come. -Yay!
That's it, everybody. Thank you. Meeting's adjourned.
[laughs]
[Paige] I'm so excited!
Hey, April.
Um, I'm just curious why you voted
against the silent dance?
Because the world doesn't revolve around you.
-I'm sorry? -You should be.
Oh, and I'm sure Casey's gonna love it at Clayton Prep.
Never mind what happens to our girls' chances at a state title.
-What does she have to do with this... -Casey is the anchor in our relay.
There's no way our girls are gonna qualify without her.
But who cares about that? Right?
[cellphone vibrates]
Case, hey, hon. You okay?
We put our customers first, so I'm going to help you out.
I'm not ready to take the D-Train to Bonetown.
Sir, I got to handle this. Any other nerd in a blue shirt can help you.
What's up?
How can I have sex when I've never even seen boobs?
Oh, is that what's going on?
Look, when I was a kid, I was terrified of the water.
Then my dad decided it was time for me to learn to swim,
so he threw me in the deep end at Holiday Inn.
Now I swim like an otter. You probably know all about those, huh?
Of course. They can stay underwater for up to four minutes,
but what does swimming have to do with sex?
This isn't a swimming pool.
Nope. It's a titty club.
This way, you'll know what to expect
and won't lose your shit when you see Paige's boobs.
And bonus, my cousin Sunil caters the buffet here
and it is off the chain!
This guy knows what I'm talking 'bout.
Okay.
You ready for this?
Yes.
Nope! Not doing that.
Too many lights, too much sound. No way.
Okay, maybe that was a bad idea.
Come to think of it, I still have a recurring nightmare
where I'm being eaten by a pool raft shaped like my dad.
You think that's connected?
Hey, man. It's okay.
You did good.
But I was kind of looking forward to the goat curry tacos.
Have your tacos. I'll wait out here.
I'll be quick. I won't get a lap dance.
Just one plate, then we're out of here. Cool?
[snaps fingers]
[Destiny] I get it, kid.
I work here and this place can be too much for me, too.
I use earplugs.
Earplugs can actually cause tinnitus, which is a ringing in the ears.
I use noise-canceling headphones. They're much better. You should try them.
-I'm Destiny. -I'm Sam Gardner.
So why are you standing out here all alone, Sam Gardner?
My girlfriend wants to have sex,
but I'm nervous and ill-prepared.
I've never even seen boobs before.
-Want some advice? -Yes, please.
Just be kind to her. That's all that really matters.
Don't worry about the sex stuff.
At a certain point, biology will just take over.
Biology is my favorite subject.
Good for you.
But just so that you'll feel a little more prepared.
Oh.
Wow.
Yeah. I know.
Good luck with your girlfriend.
'Sup, Destiny?
Hey, Zahid.
What did I miss?
I got a fraud alert on my credit card.
You have to pick the most expensive dress in the store?
[sobs]
Oh, honey.
I'm joking. I'm just kidding you.
I don't want to go to Clayton Prep.
Okay.
And honestly...
I don't know if I can go.
Apparently they found out that I punched Bailey Bennett.
-I know. I check in with them. -Then why are you telling people
that I'm going to go there and buying me shirts?
Because I think you're amazing,
and I think you're gonna get in anyway.
I'm just...
I'm...
I'm scared because I don't want to leave you guys
and Evan and my team.
Just the whole Clayton Prep thing is starting to feel kind of like...
Selfish.
-Yeah. -Yeah.
Even Sharice turned against me.
No. Sharice is your best friend.
When you were little, she followed you like a puppy dog.
No, she was the one that stole my clothes.
She's a little bitch.
[laughs] I know.
Honey...
It's okay to be a little selfish.
Thanks, Mom.
You kept the tags on, right?
Duh.
How's your foot?
They have to do an x-ray to make sure, but they think it's fractured.
I'm such an idiot.
I'm sure I've seen way more idiotic.
[laughs]
Yeah, well, thanks for making me come.
I would've ignored this forever if it weren't for you.
No problem. And I wanted to apologize about asking you about my own stuff.
I know you're Sam's therapist, and you try to keep things professional.
-Yeah. -All right. I'll see you later.
My brother's...
My brother is autistic.
Jesse. He's not as high functioning as Sam.
He's minimally verbal.
As a kid, we couldn't even walk through a parking lot
because he'd have to stop behind every car and read the license plate.
But my parents didn't acknowledge
he was on the spectrum till he was 16.
Hmm.
They kept insisting it was a speech issue
and that he'd grow out of it.
The saddest thing in my life
is wondering what he would've been like had he gotten interventions early.
It's why I do what I do.
They didn't want to acknowledge it because they were ashamed.
They were afraid of the social isolation
that comes with having a kid who's different.
And I feel for them.
You just want to pretend nothing's wrong.
Yeah, well, I used to be really good at that.
All right, I should get going.
And I'm gonna take you up on that referral, if it's still okay.
Yeah. Totally cool.
-All right. -I'll e-mail you.
-Okay. Take it easy. -Thanks.
[cellphone rings]
Hey. You need something?
Um, no, I just...
I just wanted to apologize.
What?
The way I handled the thing with Chuck and not telling him about Sam.
I don't know. I don't know.
There's a part of me that's...
that's ashamed.
It's not who I am anymore,
and it's not who I want to be anymore.
Oh, honey.
I don't know why, but I'm going to try to continue to figure it out
and deal with it better and...
I just--
I'm sorry, okay?
I know.
All right.
Um, are you home yet?
No. I just have, um...
I have one little thing to do and then I'll be home soon.
Okay, well, I'll see you soon, and I love you, okay?
Bye.
[Sharice] Mrs. Gardner?
I really need to get to youth group.
Yeah, I don't think so, Sharice.
Where are we going?
I've known you since the third grade. I've hand-washed your retainer.
I keep mint-flavored Oreos at the house for you.
Now I want to know what's going on, and I want to know now.
Okay, I know.
I messed up, and I'm so sorry.
Casey's my best friend, and...
When I heard you were leaving
I just got upset. I can't believe you didn't tell me.
Well, I didn't want to jinx it. And I'm not even in the school yet.
You don't tell me anything anymore.
You've got a boyfriend, and I never see you,
and you got your hair cut without even talking to me about it.
Okay.
-I'm sorry. -Me, too.
Come here.
Oh! [laughs]
Sharice, this is dumb.
But do you want to be my date to the dance?
Are you only asking me 'cause Evan can't go because he's a thief?
Yes.
I'd love to!
Okay, great. [laughs]
Come on.
Yuck. Your feet stink.
What are you drawing?
A portrait of a wise woman I met today.
Oh, my God! Try to unsee! Try to unsee!
I'm familiarizing myself with the female body
-in anticipation of losing my virginity. -Try to unhear! Try to unhear!
-Oh, my God, Sam! -What?
That's disgusting! You need to put that away!
-Seriously, don't-- -I'm not putting it away.
-Erase it. Who taught you that? -It's beautiful.
-What was that? Ew! -Destiny taught me that.
[Casey] Are you watching porn online?
-Sam, that's a serious problem. -I'm not.
-[Sam] I went to a strip bar. -[chattering continues]
[Sam] I met Destiny, and she's very nice.
She was very nice.
Finally.
My phone died an hour ago. I've been sitting alone with my thoughts.
And I'm in the middle of a breakup, so that is not a fun place to be.
Well, we won't be performing an x-ray today.
Why not? My ankle's okay?
Miss Sasaki, are you aware you're pregnant?
[rock music plays]
♪ Don't look ahead There's stormy weather ♪
♪ Another roadblock in our way ♪
♪ But if we go, we go together ♪
♪ Our hands are tied here if we stay ♪
♪ Oh, we set our dreams to carry us ♪
♪ If they don't come we will run ♪
♪ Now we push right past to find out ♪
♪ Or either win what they all lost ♪
♪ Oh, ah ♪
♪ We know now we won't go ♪
♪ Oh, ah ♪
♪ Our lives worth fighting for ♪