-Thank you. -Thank you.
Hello.
How are you?
Hello, auntie, how are you? Oh! one second.
Dhruv!
-Hi! -How are you?
Fine.
Kavya's been waiting for you for so long.
Please go and meet her.
Just a second.
Hi.
Congrats.
-Thanks, man. -Thank you.
I'm so glad you came.
Hey, this is Dhruv.
-Hey. -Dhruv, this is my boyfriend...
I mean, husband, Ruchir.
Oh, by the way, Dhruv has won a Nobel prize in math.
Wow, that's really cool, dude.
Wait, is there a Nobel Prize in math?
-Got this for you guys. -Thank you.
Thank you.
Congrats.
Dhruv.
Dhruv?
Dhruv!
Dhruv.
-Dhruv! -Dhruv!
Dhruv!
Where are you lost?
Let's go.
So, it's a long distance?
Yeah.
We'll be fine.
Of course.
-Take a selfie as well. -Sure, come.
Don't run away with somebody?
I'll ask Sonu to keep an eye on you. Hmm?
Kavu? You're crying?
Oye!
I'm sorry.
I wanted to hide this for a little longer, but I can't do it.
Hide what?
I'm coming with you to Bangalore.
-What do you mean? -I mean, I'm coming with you to Bangalore.
I'll settle you in, take the next flight, and tata!
Look happy, you fucker.
Yeah, but...
-Why? -What do you mean "Why"?
Because I love you.
Indian School of Statistics. Such a lovely building, dude.
Hello, sir. Um... Is Ganga quarters this way?
What?
Try asking in English.
Ganga quarters is here?
Yes. Take left, then right. The stone building. Are you a lecturer?
No... Helping Geeta Iyer. With her research.
Ma'am, ma'am. Geeta ma'am!
Sorry, sorry. Geeta Iyer ma'am.
Assistant, is it?
Yes, assistant.
Welcome.
Thank you.
What are you eating, sir?
Thatte Idli.
Thatte Idli!
Tat-tedli?
Tatte?
Tatte Idli?
Married?
No.
Five hundred.
For?
For...
Five hundred!
-For? -Allowing her to stay with you, brother!
Girlfriend, boyfriend, not allowed together, together!
Job risk.
-Five hundred. -It's fine..
-Wait, let me get it. -It's okay.
Take it.
Thank you.
Come.
Do you want me to take your bag?
No.
-Give, I'll hold it. -No! It's fine.
That's it. Chill.
Why are you so irritated?
-Do you hear that? -It's beautiful.
A lot of people must have had sex here.
-Right on this spot! -Dhruv! Please, dude!
It's such a beautiful place. You can't even hear cars,
-and this is what you're thinking about? -Yeah.
Every time I'm in a place like this,
I can just imagine it being littered with used condoms.
Oh, Dhruv! Please, dude!
What? We've seen it so many times!
Don't you remember the first time you went out for a date?
I don't wanna think about it.
-You wanna recall what we saw? -No, no.
-Should I remind you? -No! Ganga. Ganga Quarters.
I should really learn some words in Kannada, right?
Yeah, you should. Fuck, I can't wait to lie down.
Are you mad? Talk softly.
All right, come on. Try it pushing it downwards a little.
That's what I'm doing.
It's done.
Okay.
Wow!
Hello, home for the next six months.
I'm Dhruv Vats and you are...?
It's quite cute.
It's just a little dirty.
Fuck!
What a long walk, right?
Thank God you came, dude. You can help me clean this.
You're really saying that?
You're such an asshole. You finished the water?
You didn't even ask.
Sorry, babe.
Ew, Dhruv. Please never call me that.
You've been doing too much "ew" since the morning.
I'm sorry I'm too poor to call you my babe.
I've noticed that only rich guys call their girlfriends babe.
-What nonsense is that? -I'm not kidding,
-seriously it's just the rich.. -Shut up.
Okay, let's go. Tell me.
Where do you want to begin?
-Kavu? -Hmm?
Look at this.
This girl must have also come over for work
or research or something like you, right?
Yeah.
How did she manage being far away from family?
You should know, you've done it.
I never really felt that, no?
Because I met you soon after I moved to Bombay.
Now I'll know.
Sorry, one second. I'm a little distracted.
What is this?
My warm, little heart.
What are you thinking?
People have come here from so far.
I just landed up here.
You didn't just land up here. You applied for this.
You gave an interview for it. She selected you.
Now, you're here to do your research.
Aren't you excited to be working with Geeta ma'am?
I am. In fact, I'm very excited.
But... I don't know why it feels like...
the summer vacation of my life has ended.
Do we have the time to make mistakes? Like...
-Can we make more mistakes? -Of course we can, Dhruv.
The intention should be to make better mistakes.
Yeah.
You know...
ever since I left Delhi for college, I never really went back home.
I mean, I just left home.
What if it happens again?
No matter what happens... good or bad...
this stays.
-You know that, right? -Yeah.
This is our summer vacation.
-Okay? -Yeah.
"Babe."
Yes, you can say it. You're rich.
Do you remember the first time we went shopping? You were like, "Kavu!
Look at that! Maggi! Sister-Fucker!
Kavu! Look at that! Snacks! Sister-Fucker!
Kavu! Look at that! Biryani masala! Fuck!"
You're talking nonsense! I was nothing like that, don't talk crap. Mad!
-And do you remember how you were? -How?
"Momo! Look at that! Kokum sharbat! Momo! Look at that! Chamomile Tea!"
-"Momo! Look at that! Couples Crossfit!" -Shut up!
Dhruv.
No, dude.
Please, dude. Please.
We shouldn't have bought this organic ghee.
It's okay.
-How much? -Two thousand, five hundred and ninety.
-Chill. I'm paying. -It's fine, Dhruv.
-No, I'm paying. -Dhruv, it's okay.
-Kavya, I'm paying. Chill. -It's fine.
- Take this. - Take this.
-No no. -Just let it be, no?
Thank you.
Come.
It's so good, right?
-How did you find out about this place? -I was doing some research.
Cheap and tasty food places near the college.
Came across this. Lunch and dinner both will be sorted, dude. It's for free.
-Becoming a proper college student, right? -Of course, my cougar.
I have a monthly balance and that's why I asked you to let me pay.
I'll find out how much to spend.
-You know, you can ask me for money. -Of course, and I will.
Thank you.
Even if your generation doesn't believe in God, still always first in line
when it comes to using God for fashion, selfies and food.
Such a selfish generation.
You both will find a quiet corner and kiss each other.
You all think... that every place is for your honeymoon.
Thank you, sir.
Ruining this world.
Ungrateful pricks.
It looks like you haven't eaten in many years.
Eat. Enjoy.
Thank you.
Listen, I think he thinks we're on our honeymoon.
Yeah, for sure.
-Smells like pickle, no? -Hmm.
Chili and... something like tamarind pickle.
Kavu?
What do you tell people when they... ask you...
when are you and Dhruv getting married, or what's our scene?
I just say...
we haven't thought about it yet.
Why?
What do you say?
Same thing.
Sweet guy, dude. He's giving blessings over there.
Now it looks sorted.
Thank you.
It's like exercise to my eyes, dude.
There's so much greenery everywhere.
I think that's why they build educational institutes at such places.
See, your eyes are connected to your brains.
So maybe just helps you think beyond types? Huh?
-You're just making this up, aren't you? -But it does sound true, though.
And I'm so glad you came here, Dhruv.
It's so nice.
Kissing in college?
Cheap thrills?
-Eww, dude. -Oh, it's fine if you say it!
It's not okay if I say it?
We paid 500 to the guard. We should take advantage, right?
I was the one who paid the guard. I should take some advantage, too.
You are my cheap thrill.
-Kavu? -Yes?
-Did you send a photo of the room to Mom? -Yes.
Why? You keep setting these high standards for no reason.
She was really excited for you!
And I sent it because you didn't. Big deal!
What is that? We are different people, right?
It's not a big deal for you, but it is for me, right?
We are different people.
Because you say Panda and I say Panda.
I can't go to watch...
a picture, dude. I have a lot of work.
Why are you lazing since morning?
-I was tired. -Yeah.
And this Shashank sir and Geeta ma'am, dude.
Yeah. But now it will be fine, right?
Geeta is getting a new assistant, isn't she?
Is he cute?
Oh ho ho ho.
Aren't you in a relationship?
So, I can't ask if he's cute or not?
-Yeah. -Momo.
I think they're talking about you.
Right?
Do you want to go say hi?
No, dude. I'll meet them tomorrow and then say...
"Oh, I think I saw you guys at the canteen."
Just go and meet them? It'll be nice and informal.
Anyway, it looks like they're chilling in their pajamas only.
So?
So, go!
Are you sure?
Okay.
How do you make new friends?
Hi, dude. I'm Dhruv. You were talking about Geeta ma'am's assistant.
-Hi. -Hi.
-Hello. -Hello.
-Kapil. -Dhruv.
Santosh.
-Hi Murthy. -Emu.
Take a seat.
Where are you from?
I'm actually from Delhi, but I've been in Bombay for nine, ten years.
-I'm a little from both places. -Okay.
This is for you.
Do you know what it's called?
Tatte Idli.
It's a... Tatte-Idli.
Is that your friend?
Yeah.
Hi.
-Hi. -Hello.
Please.
Thank you.
"Thank you"?
Why are you thanking me, crazy?
Who would bandage me if I was alone?
You're a little nervous to live alone, aren't you?
It's okay. You can admit it. It's totally fine.
Yes. I am.
Listen. It's just a matter of six months.
And I'm just two hours away.
Six. There's also traffic. That's not that bad.
Just six hours, dude. You call, and I'll come. Just like that.
-You chill out. Okay? -Yeah.
It's not bad.
I'm there for you, okay?
I know.
- Listen. - Say.
It's been a weird day, right?
We'll go out?? We'll eat your chicken dosa.
No.
Let's go and drink.
Let's chill, okay? My treat.
-Your treat? -Yeah, my treat.
Let's go. The cougar gets to enjoy now.
Then we can come back to your hostel room and have sex.
That sounds so hot, man.
So, Mr. Vats...
Yes, Kulkarni?
Good choice of place, huh?
Isn't it a little too happening? I didn't think it would be so happening.
Why? Can't we come to a happening place?
Dhruv, what if we get bored of talking to each other on the phone?
Have you come here to settle me or unsettle?
We're playing worst-case-scenarios so we're well prepared.
Okay, what if I have a crush on someone?
What if I start having more fun without you?
What if I don't come back to Bombay?
Like never ever.
What if I find someone who understands me better than you?
Who is better than you. Who is funnier than you.
And then I fall out of love with you...
and I introduce him to your mutton cutlet gravy?
Momo!
This is a Mad Max level worst-case scenario, dude!
Did you have to say mutton cutlet?
It's hurting right here. Literally I can feel it.
Fuck.
It's fucking hot!
What an uncle you are, ya!
-You're an uncle! Idiot. -I'm a babe, right?
So I'm a babe-a too!
That's so stupid, Dhruv!
I love stupid things and talking about stupid things.
We'll always stay stupid, okay?
-What will we stay? -Stupid. We'll always stay stupid.
Please don't go into Geeta Iyer's office and say that.
That I'm a Ph. D dropout who loves stupid things.
That's exactly what I'll say. Such a nice introduction.
All right, people.
Everybody on the dance floor. That's the last song for tonight.
Not us!
Right?
Please!
-What are we doing, Kavu? -We're dancing, Dhruv.
-Yeah, but why? -Because everybody is doing it.
Have we become boring?
Why?
We would have definitely been watching TV if this was a hotel room.
You really enjoy watching TV in a hotel room, right?
That's true.
I'll go to the washroom.
See, this is why I didn't want you to come, man.
Yeah.
Hey. Sorry. Do you have a matchbox by any chance?
Yeah, one second.
-Thanks, I'll give it right back. -No, it's fine, keep it.
Thanks, good night.
Good night.
We got lucky, fucker.
Dhruv, why would you say that?
Say what?
What you just did.
What, the... babe thing?
The not wanting me to come here thing.
It was a joke, Kavya.
No, it wasn't.
It was a joke, Kavya.
It's...
It's just that I wanted to come alone and do everything by myself.
Why?
It would give me confidence. Nothing else. Seriously.
Dhruv, you're going to be alone for six months.
What difference would one day make?
-Yeah, I know. -What do you mean by you know?
You're making me feel bad for coming here for you.
Why are you saying that, Kavya? Sorry. Don't say that.
Because even in the temple, you finished all the tamarind pickle rice.
Or whatever those last three bites were.
You always ask me for the last bite.
And then you didn't even bother to introduce me to your friends.
Are you already preparing for the long distance?
No, Kavya.
I'm just trying to be independent.
From my Amazon parcels to eggs for the house...
You just take care of everything.
I mean, what do I do sitting at home?
I keep chilling, and keep getting fat. That's it.
All of this is far too comfortable, dude.
That's the safety net that scares me.
So you could have just said that, Dhruv.
And anyway, you've misunderstood me.
I'm not doing any of this to make you... dependent or lazy or anything.
And I'm the one who pushed you to do this, right?
I'm just doing all of this out of love.
I'm sorry.
I am a little nervous.
There's some self-doubt, too.
I feel a little smothered, dude.
You're doing so much.
Smothered?
Really?
I don't know.
Ever since I found out that Dad is planning
to sell off the house to pay the loan,
I've been terrified.
I really need to fucking kill it, man. I can't pay a price like that.
I'm about to be 30, dude.
Dhruv, you always mess your mind up... by over-thinking about what's to come.
You're here now. Just enjoy these six months.
Yeah, you're right.
Are you surprised?
You know? Our bathroom in Bombay?
It has two tiles in it, which are pushed a little forward.
And the taps of both the kitchen taps is different.
I noticed it yesterday.
It's like you have to travel far
to notice things that were always in front of you?
I'm getting all these family-type feelings for you.
I mean, like I want to be there for you. I want to care for you.
This is normal, isn't it?
Yeah, I think it's normal behaviour.
That's what we are, right?
Family?
Listen.
What I was saying was...
I'm too tired to have sex right now.
I'm glad you said it first.
Let's just cuddle.
Momo?
You think we should give the same salary to Lata didi?
Because I just eat one and a half roti.
What all goes on in your head?
Cuddling is the best.
Bye.
Yes?
Listen...
What?
When we were hugging...
did you fart?
What?
You can recognize my farts here as well?
It's called love.
Love.
Bye.