A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIES
You're the last one.
And then it is fuck you... forever.
A
You have not lost.
There is a way.
A way for you to hold in your hand the power of the galaxy.
What do you mean?
We thought to use...
all of this to conquer only Neptune.
But why?
Why merely Neptune?
That gives you the power to control every planet in the galaxy.
Yes.
Every planet in the galaxy.
I can penetrate into the most secret chambers of the galaxy.
Fuck you.
HAVE YOU SEEN THIS DOG? "GROUCHO" VERY GENEROUS REWARD!
''Silken smooth, and shiny, and soft,
these curls won't abandon you.
Creamazone means lasting hold and definition.''
You ready for another one?
Do I have a choice?
Oh, your options with AdBuddies are limitless.
Okay? That's what makes us superior to PallyAds.
I was joking.
-"Not enough time-- -Wait, when you say "limitless"...
do you mean actually limitless?
Like, if I needed a bus ticket to Salt Lake City
and I brought you with me to pay for it?
I mean, not necessarily you, specifically, but one of you...
to pay for the hotel and meals, and the bus ticket back,
would that be possible?
No one's ever asked me that.
Well, it would require you to view thousands of ads, but...
Yes, I suppose it could be possible. If that was, um...
What?
Sounds like it might be kind of fun.
Yeah.
What's in Salt Lake City?
Um, my little sister.
I owe her a visit.
I'm gonna read you this time...
because I am healthy Annie now,
and healthy people read books...
and travel, and exercise...
and take care of their minds.
DON QUIXOTE
-Where's Jackie? -She's in the shitter.
What the fuck
Yeah, I took your money. You haven't paid rent in three months.
I haven't had a job in five months.
Well, maybe you should be a little more goal-oriented.
Can I at least have 20 bucks?
Yes.
Cleaning is progress.
Error. Error.
SANITATION
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Can't be processed. Can't be processed.
Error.
Godspeed, little shit-eater.
Hello?
Are you dead?
No.
Good.
You gonna come out today?
Your yard is a fucking mess.
"All things excellent are as difficult as they are rare."
Mmm. Is that Rilke?
Spinoza.
I like it.
I just came by to tell you I'm gonna go away for a while.
I was thinking about taking the bus to Salt Lake, go see Ellie.
You could come.
We could go together.
Oh, I'm really busy right now.
Is the combination to the safe still the same?
I just need to borrow a little bit for my bus ticket.
I changed it.
To what?
Your birthday.
Got tired of thinking of your mother every time.
Promise me you're gonna eat while I'm gone?
I got you cereal.
Apple Jacks?
Of course.
Hey, maybe when I'm back we could go to Totonno's for dinner.
Maybe.
Okay. Love you, Dad.
TIRED OF HERE?
BROOKLYN PUBLIC LIBRARY BUS TERMINAL
25 - 706 - SALT LAKE, GATE 14
BUS INFORMATION
A
Fuck you.
I need more.
I can't.
But why, though?
That's a great move, dude-wad.
You dirty motherfucker.
Come on, bud.
Calvin.
It was a one-time thing.
My dad had a mini-stroke after I stole 'em.
Why do you even like that ULP shit?
-It's dark. -So, what if I really,
really need some more, however I can get it?
I don't got all day here, pal.
Sign up for a Neberdine study. Help make my dad's company millions.
That's it, I just sign up?
-That was pathetic. -No.
-They screen you. -Checkmate.
You could be testing deodorant for a week.
I'm fucked.
-Just lost a hundred dollars. -What's yours is mine now, bitch.
Hey. Hey, you're my friend.
Yeah?
-And can I say something, as your friend? -Sure, yeah.
You sound like a junkie.
I'm not a junkie.
I'm a recreational drug user. Like you, by the way.
-What is the name of the person at intake? -I can't tell you that.
ULP's gotten way more secretive since the suicides.
Give me a name.
Gesundheit. Gesundheit!!
Rude.
Lugo.
Patricia Lugo.
Thank you.
Nice friend.
It's yours.
Right into the eucalyptus fund.
Three hundred to get started.
-To blackmail somebody? -Yeah.
Okey-dokey.
Who's your target?
I can't read your handwriting.
Patricia Lugo.
She's the intake director at Neberdine Pharmaceuticals and Biotech.
You going in and getting high and robbing the place?
Patricia Lugo, Nerberdine Pharmaceuticals Biotech.
She paid Zip Dox to have her public arrest records scrubbed.
Zip Dox is Shit Dox. Easy to unscrub.
This is legal, right?
Think we'd have it on the storefront if the Banner Act didn't make it legal?
Yes.
You gotta pay us more than she paid Shit Dox.
Five hundred.
You get a free calendar.
Patricia Lugo. Gambling addict, disorderly arrest in Atlantic City.
Lost custody of her daughter, Usnavy.
Goes to Hunter.
Good job, had it for 18 months.
Probably had records scrubbed so she could get it.
You want the whole skeleton-closet file?
I could threaten to kidnap the daughter too.
No.
-That shit always works. -No, it's fine. I don't...
-I don't want to harm her in any way. -Uh-huh.
Okay.
Here's your calendar. Other options.
Volunteers at CP Center, user of Friend Proxy,
pays way too much for luggage--
Wait, Friend Proxy
Ah...
Interception.
Hm?
Patricia?
Juanita.
Oh!
Hey.
-It's so good to see you again. -You too. You too.
You know, um, every time I walk in this place,
I get pulled back into this room, you know?
Oh, me too.
Me too.
I just love little trees.
I meant because of how we met.
-Right here. -Sure.
-At the bonsais. -Oh, yeah. That too. That too.
Do you remember that summer?
How much fun we had, right?
Oh!
Running up and down Coney every day...
Eating icy pops.
Yeah, when we took the train, with Uncle Liam.
Now, who the fuck is... Uncle Liam?
I'm sorry. I-I don't... Do you want to start over or something?
Seriously
No. I'm...
What...
'Cause you really don't have a very good feel for people, honey.
You're using a service that gives you pretend friends.
I have real friends. This is just more convenient.
Mm-hmm.
Oh, you have friends?
You know what? I don't even work for Friend Proxy.
All right?
I canceled your appointment, and I am here to fuck up your life, lady.
I'm gonna blackmail the shit out of you.
What?
What Who are you?
Forget it. I'm sorry.
No, no, no, no, wait. Who are you I'm sorry.
Hey.
Can I sit with you?
I'm just trying to understand.
I'm a bit confused.
Am I a mark?
Yeah.
For what? I'm...
I'm broke.
I was trying to get into a study at your work.
And I said I'm sorry, so can you leave now, please?
Why?
-I really don't need... -No, really, I'm asking you...
why?
Is this some AA shit?
I'm enjoying this pond.
You remind me of my little girl, that's all.
If there's anything I can help...
So...
why?
Because I am addicted to a drug that your company's testing.
That's not the "why" I'm asking.
What "why" are you asking?
Five years ago, my sister and I got into a really bad fight.
Very, very bad.
And I can't fix it.
So there's this rock that sits in my stomach, this cold rock.
Like a boulder, and it's just there...
all the time.
And I found this pill...
It helps me get through the day.
It's not hurting anyone.
And it makes me feel good. It is the only thing that makes me feel good.
Have you tried talking to her?
I can't.
Why shouldn't I be able to take a pill like that whenever I want?
You should, hon.
If it ain't hurting anyone.
Hmm?
Super happy.
Helpful.
Togetherness.
You don't have to rush.
Okay.
Sorry.
Sisters.
Making faces at each other.
It's supposed to be an emotion.
What you feel.
Fine.
Now, please turn your attention to me...
as I ask you this final question.
The test is complete.
Please go back to the reception area and wait.
Did I...?
Did I pass the test
I was telling the truth about all those pictures.
-This test is not about the truth. -Well, what is it about?
Defense mechanisms.
I don't have fucking defense mechanisms.
I think you should let me do it again. Who's in charge of the red light?
I... I don't fucking understand because I am supposed to be part of the trial.
I'm sorry.
This is fucking bullshit.
Patricia. Patricia.
No. No, no, no, no, no. No more favors.
I got bosses around. No more. Go.
-We had a deal. -I said I could funnel you through ULP.
You failed the intake test.
It is out of my hands.
No, I have to get into that study, Patricia.
All the way.
I can't.
Move on, please.
There you go.
Thank you.
Patricia, may I speak with you, please?
You have a daughter.
Her name is Usnavy, and she goes to Hunter College.
And if you don't get me into that study, you're never gonna see her again.
What?
Yeah, I know a guy who has a van,
and if anything happens to me, he knows what to do.
You're fucking crazy.
I'm not fucking crazy, Patricia.
I'm just goal-oriented.
Two minutes.
Go sit over there.
Owen Milgrim, please report to DM Test Room five.
Owen Milgrim, please report to DM Test Room five for ULP screening.
What's the color?
This one's the same, that's...
Well, I guess it's kind of gray.
-Hi. Excuse me. -Hi.
I have some good news. We're going to upgrade you.
Oh.
Just between you and me, it's a much, much safer trial.
Okay. Um, does it have the same pay?
-You just hand this over to me. -Okay.
And you can go and talk to my colleague over there at the desk,
and sort it all out.
Okay.
So-- so, what do you mean, "safer trial"?
It's fine.
Your daughter is safe.
For now.
The human brain is vast as the cosmos,
and equally unexplored.
We here at Neberdine Pharmaceutical Biotech
are pioneering a revolutionary procedure
that will unlock the secret mysteries of the mind,
and replace old-fashioned talk therapy... forever.
Sorry, Sigmund.
Hello. I'm Dr. James K. Mantleray.
And I'm Dr. Robert Muramoto.
Welcome to Phase III of the ULP testing.
You are not only participants in a pharmaceutical drug trial,
you are pioneers at the forefront of a new world.
You may notice you're here with 11 other subjects.
But don't worry, your experiences here,
likely very powerful,
will be private and discreet,
and entirely your own.
No one sees into your heads...
And the multiple fantasy cells hiding inside there.
...but us.
Now you're probably wondering, "How does it work?"
And it's simple.
Three pills taken in three steps...
A B C
the GRTA.
Hello, friends. I'm a smart computer.
After ingesting the pills,
the GRTA's cutting-edge artificial intelligence
will identify, map, and confront the learned programming of your brain.
At the end of this trial,
don't be surprised if you experience pure, unaffected joy.
You'll be born again, but not as a baby.
Now, let's take a closer look.
The diagnostic stage.
Pill A seeks out your core traumas and pulls them to the surface.
We call it Agonia.
Through your memories, we'll see the worst moments of your life.
But don't worry... it's safe.
We observe, using powerful microwave technology,
the known and unknown anchors of pain in your personal history
in order to create an arborization map
that the GRTA will use as a guide for pills B and C.
Behavioral.
-Time to show your... -Blind spots!
Unfortunately, the brain is remarkably skilled
at protecting itself.
With the second pill, you can identify
self-defense mechanisms, blind spots,
and the mazes and walls that your mind creates to hide yourself...
from you.
Finally, it's time for...
confrontation.
Confrexia.
This is what has eluded psychoanalysts since the discovery of the unconscious.
The end...
of the rainbow.
Confrontation and acceptance.
Once we've identified your core traumas
and mapped your bio-psycho-social symptoms,
the GRTA mega-computer remaps
a more efficient system, custom-tailored to you,
forging healthier pathways with powerful,
non-surgical microwave technologies.
Welcome to the start of your new life.
You will never be the same again.
Any questions?
Good.
Even subjects, we'll provide you with your pre-weighed meal,
as the odd-numbered subjects...
begin the trial.
Odd-numbered subjects,
I assume you know who you are by now,
please stand up, form a line, and get ready to begin your trials.
As for the rest of you, please just sit tight. We'll get to you soon.
Line up in order, please. Number one in the front.
Everybody thought I was crazy, but they were all wrong.
-All right. -We'll talk about this later.
Number nine.
"I dried my tears and armed my fears
With ten thousand shields and spears.
Soon my Angel came again;
I was armed, he came in vain;
For the time of youth was fled,
And grey hairs were on my head."
Oh, Robert, how poetic.
I'm glad you like it.
Oh, I loved it.
Now back I go, into their minds.
One, three, five, seven, nine, eleven.
When you reach your seats, you can put on your aprons.
-What's the vest for? -Check number one's headrest.
It's like being at a dentist's office.
-What's the vest for? -Precautionary.
Did they say anything about radiation?
Precautionary.
The vest protects your important parts
from the nominal amount of residual headset radiation.
Can you check number one, please?
Final stages checks, please.
-Cooling. -Operational.
Electrical.
Stable.
Med profile.
-Uploaded and carved out. -Take one of each.
I can see Gertie's safety net is supple and responsive.
She liked what you read.
I know.
Take one of each. Take one of each, please.
Wait!
Dr. Fujita will tell you when you can take it.
A
The data we collect from our subjects, in the next three days,
is absolutely vital to the success of this trial.
What's more, their lives are in our hands.
No more mistakes.
Subjects, please ingest your pill with your water.
GRTA
Visual check clear. Go to blue?
Going to blue.
Let's lay them down gently, people.
Hard entry is our enemy.
Tank is full.
Please remove nozzle.
Have a nice day.
Think fast.
Oh.
There's 24,000 words in there.
What?
You know... picture?
Oh.
Twenty-four thousand... words.
Cute.
How many words is that?
One.
-Okay, '80s. -There's a supernatural element.
Yep, but it has to make you cry.
-Oh, it's this one. -Oh-oh. It's a body-switch movie.
He's him, and he's him.
And they crashed their dirt bikes into each other,
they woke up in the hospital, and they've switched bodies.
And the young one has been masturbating constantly.
Now they're on this hijinks-filled
wackadoo road trip that ends with...
a secret sect of Utah businessmen...
that, um...
mmm...
practice soul-swapping.
I'm surprised you didn't add sodomy. That's pretty light for you.
Well, I'm not finished yet.
It's tragic, because that old man is now in this young body,
and he's gonna leave his grandson,
just ditch him, and let him slip off into Alzheimer's.
There she is.
I'm actually pissed about this.
Hey!
I see you, motherfucker!
That wasn't your body in the first place! You got to give it back!
You can't cheat Father Time!
Apparently in Colorado, fast lane means slow lane.
Oh, my God! That's a bumpy road!
To the left.
To your left.
Okay.
Right now, it looks like you're sort of, like, fondling the underside of it.
-I am not. What am I supposed to do? -Just, like, give it some gumption.
-That's perfect. Like that? -Yes!
Stay there. Stay.
One.
Two.
Three.
That's really funny. Can I have the camera back, please?
No.
It's pretty. I wanted to take a nice picture.
Well, I am the designated documentarian, so no.
Yeah, I know. I gotta go.
-Love you. -Love you too.
See you soon, honey.
-Bye. -Bye.
I like this.
What?
Just... doing something with you. I don't know, it's...
-It's been a while. -Was that Mom...
that you were talking to just now?
No, that was Ben.
I just told him that we'd be there by tomorrow night.
I just figured because you and Mom have reconnected... or whatever.
I didn't reconnect with her, okay?
She wrote me a letter, said it was an emergency,
that she needed something,
-so I called her back, once. -Oh, my God.
-Here, take it. Read it. -No. God.
-I'm not mad. -I didn't say you were.
-Stop. -I didn't say you were mad.
Let's watch a movie.
Nothing to think over.
Okay.
They're trying to say that I'm in a gang.
-They think that I'm the leader of a gang. -Well, you told them.
You waste his time and mine.
-Oh, no, thank you. -No, can we...?
Stop, I like this movie. I like it.
Leave it.
He requires more serious...
Annie's favorite.
I can't believe you like this fantasy shit.
But it's real.
Annie, I'm Ellia, your cursed Elven sister.
Rescue me.
From what?
From a normal life.
That is all on you.
Okay.
I've got a fantasy for you.
About a girl
moving her life to Salt Lake City,
because that's where her fiancé has been transferred...
because she thinks it'd make her happy.
But she... But she's afraid...
of a nice family that stays together...
a nice job,
nice kids.
Afraid because maybe she can't maintain that...
stability.
Maybe she'll just realize that isn't what she wanted, and she'll just...
fuck it all up and...
her kids along with it.
But she doesn't.
It works.
It works out fine.
Sounds like a fantasy of someone who gave up.
You have such a thing.
-A thing? -Mm-hmm.
With, like, going eight levels too harsh.
-No, don't do that. -Do what?
Don't guess what you think I think and then say it like it's coming from you.
You don't think that I have my own doubts, Annie?
You're so caught up with your own narcissism.
-I'm sorry, my narcissism? -The fact you can't take care of anything,
-or keep one relationship going. -I'm sorry about your dog.
Your fucking Mom-like narcissism.
-I loved him too! -Even the whole armpit pictures.
What point are you trying to make?
That I'm fucking stupid for wanting to remember a nice trip?
Because I'm sad. I'm sad that I'm moving away from you!
It's hard to talk to you when you're this emotional.
You're the one acting like Mom.
You know, I have my things too, I just...
I just don't broadcast them to the world.
Is that what I do?
You also fucking lie constantly.
Every second, of every day, of your entire fucking life
is broadcasting how normal you are.
You're so desperate for someone to tell you you're okay.
I don't know how this started.
I'm sorry.
I was just trying to talk to you.
You don't have to shut down just because I'm saying something real.
I'm not shutting down.
Can I say one last real thing?
Every time I think of New York, without you in it...
This is seriously true, this isn't a lie.
...I feel happy.
Because now I won't have to feel bad about not calling you,
or doing anything with you.
You'll be far away.
And we can grow apart... and we won't have to pretend we didn't.
I'm gonna miss you too, Annie.
Do you want to take an actual picture?
Of both of us?
-I'm not stupid. -What?
It's the perfect time to fuck with me again.
No, I'm not fucking with you. I'm not. I'm being serious.
Okay.
I do want to remember this.
My-- The camera is in my bag.
Here, I'll take it.
-Hold the wheel. -Okay.
They should have, like, a stick for something like this.
Three.
Two.
One. -That's so annoying.
That was fucking funny.
No, it's not funny anymore.
-Give it to me. -Come on.
-Annie... No, I bought it. -Ellie, stop. Come on.
-I did take a picture of my armpit. -Why won't you take the picture?
Welcome back, subjects.
Welcome back.