WEBVTT
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Come on!
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Good evening and welcome
to The Great Indian Kapil Show.
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Is everyone having a good time?
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Yes!
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- Are you happy?
- Yes!
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Look, Archana, Sidhu sahab,
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everyone's faces light up
as soon as Diwali arrives.
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Joy is everywhere. Everyone's happy.
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Everyone's out in their festive best.
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- Walk into a bank these days.
- Yeah.
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You won't be able to tell
the employees from the customers.
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Everyone is walking around
in colorful kurta-pajamas.
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Without the gun, you couldn't tell
the guard from the manager.
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Even the women working at the bank
come dressed in traditional saris.
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The bank may only give 6% interest,
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but customers show 100% interest in them.
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A guy comes in to withdraw 10,000 rupees,
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and ends up depositing
1,500 rupees of his own on the way out.
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And everyone loves buying
something new on Diwali.
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Sometimes, 12 people go along
just to buy a four-seater car.
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And the buyer isn't half as stressed
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- about paying the installments…
- Yeah.
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…as he is about picking which four
of the 12 people get to sit in the car.
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- Now, he drives the car himself.
- Yeah.
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- His dad sits in the front seat.
- Yes.
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That tells you right away his dad
paid 70% of the down payment.
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- His one and only wife sits in the back.
- Yes.
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Well, a wife is only one. His only saala.
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Wife, saala. One seat left.
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- If he has two jeejas…
- Then?
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- Then he picks the newest jeeja…
- Yeah.
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- …to sit in the car.
- Okay.
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He tells the older one,
"Take the scooter and bring samosas."
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Now, Diwali is one festival
when everyone tries to get back home.
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Flying in from abroad is easier.
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But traveling within India is way harder.
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Look at the trains,
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- booked solid two months in advance.
- Yes.
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A guy travels from Mumbai to Patna,
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- and his village is two hours further.
- Yeah.
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He has to struggle so much,
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it feels like he's crossing borders
illegally in his own country.
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- Flights are packed and pricey.
- Yes.
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Even on Diwali day, they're pricey.
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- Flights get cheaper after 8:00 p.m.
- Yes.
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- Airlines know Diwali is over by then.
- Yes.
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Anyone on a flight after 8:00 p.m. just
watches all of Diwali from up in the sky.
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Look how expensive tickets get
during Diwali, brother.
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Let me show you. Look at this.
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"Should I go home for Diwali
or to Bangkok?"
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Mumbai to Gorakhpur is
around 28,000 rupees, brother.
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Mumbai to Bangkok is 18,000 rupees.
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Oh, my God!
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What's a guy supposed to think?
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- It's totally unfair.
- It is.
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He thinks,
"I pour oil in lamps every year."
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This time…
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He thinks, "I'll get oil rubbed
on my body this time."
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So off he goes to Bangkok.
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- And when a guy comes back from Bangkok…
- Yeah.
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…he's got so much oil on him,
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his wife can't catch him for months.
He just slips right out!
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No matter the festival,
it's always best with loved ones.
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For this special Diwali,
we've invited a wonderful trio.
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A lovely family of a brother,
bhabhi and devar.
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With a big round of applause,
please welcome Mr. Shahid Kapoor.
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His lovely wife, Mira Rajput Kapoor,
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and Shahid's younger brother,
Ishaan Khatter.
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Welcome them with a round of applause.
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Welcome, welcome, Ishaan.
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Welcome, welcome, Mira.
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Shahid bhai.
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Shahid, Ishaan, Mira,
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- a very warm welcome to all three of you.
- Thank you.
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Thank you so much, Mira.
I know you don't usually go on TV shows.
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- I think this is your first time on TV.
- Yes.
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- Thank you for joining us.
- Thank you.
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Sidhu paaji,
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did you notice something?
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- What?
- Look at Shahid.
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Last time, he came here
with Triptii Dimri.
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He walked in with all this swagger.
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Today, he's here with his wife.
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He looks like he came straight
from a prayer meet.
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And he's heading back to one after this.
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Yes, yes.
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Shahid bhai, don't feel bad.
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It happens to everyone.
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Watch Sidhu paaji's episode.
With Malaika, he walked in
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like a politician
who just won an election.
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With his wife, he looked like
he suffered a landslide defeat.
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Sidhu paaji, give us
a fresh couplet today.
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This is the family whose arrival
has lit up our evening.
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Mira is the glow of the lamps
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and Shahid and Ishaan have
boundless talent.
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Thank you.
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I can smell the fragrance
of happiness in the air, my friend.
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Today is a festival in itself!
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Wonderful!
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But one more thing, Kapil.
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You mocked how he walked in.
I guarantee you one thing.
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- Yes.
- I saw this guy before his marriage too.
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Yeah.
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Ever since she stepped into his home,
he has prospered tenfold.
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Prospered tenfold!
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100%, 100%.
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Whether it's your physique
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or your acting,
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your whole demeanor has changed
for the better.
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So did he walk like this before?
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I meet Shahid often,
and I've met Ishaan too.
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This is our first time meeting you, Mira.
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I would like to know, on a first meeting,
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how long can you talk to someone?
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About an hour.
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When you met Shahid,
I heard you talked for seven hours.
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He's very good company.
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What do you want to say?
You want to say, "Hmm"?
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Sidhu just said everything I achieved
in the last 11 years is because of you.
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How can I take credit
for those seven hours?
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That credit goes to you too.
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He'll go far, the boy will go far!
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He'll go far!
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- When we first met, she was 20 years old.
- Really?
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I was 34 years old.
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When we sat down together,
my first thought was
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how our wavelengths would ever match.
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Seven hours flew by
without us realizing it.
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- This is the deal.
- You know, that's life.
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- That's destiny.
- This is the thing.
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But I have to tell you
two things about this meeting of ours.
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After two or three hours,
he says, "Listen,
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take out your phone."
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I said, "Okay."
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"Just take a picture of my shoes."
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- Shoes?
- I thought, "How weird!"
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We're meeting for the first time,
and he wants a photo of his shoes.
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So I thought,
"Okay, there must be a reason."
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His meaning,
"You'll beat me with them later."
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I took the photo and said, "Here."
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"No, no, turn the flash on."
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I said, "Fine, let's turn it on."
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I showed him the photo. "What is it?"
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"Can't you see my shoes glow in the dark?"
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I said, "What's the big deal?"
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Shahid bhai…
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That was your first-meeting discussion?
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The real question is,
if a guy is talking about his shoes,
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why did you still marry him?
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- Because I--
- You were in a big rush to get married.
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No, actually,
there's a story behind those shoes.
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- What's the story?
- This was 10 or 11 years ago.
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Back then, you know,
the paps had just started out.
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You rarely saw them,
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and whenever they showed up,
we'd all freak out,
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wondering where they came from.
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- Some guy would pop up like this.
- Yes.
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The special thing about those shoes
was that if you took a flash photo,
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their material was made in such a way
that it absorbed all the light.
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- Okay.
- So the rest of the photo looked dark
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and only the shoes shined.
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Bravo! Man, that's awesome!
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I was showing her those shoes.
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I forgot that she had
nothing to do with movies.
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So she wouldn't even get
the context behind it.
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Mira, how many of Shahid's films
had you seen before the wedding?
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- I'd seen three or four.
- I see.
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She always downplays it.
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- That's not true.
- I've asked her ever since we first met,
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and her answer is always,
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"Yes, I think I saw that one,
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and, yes, I just watched
an hour or so of that one."
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At first, I really believed her
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because she was 20 years old
and said it so innocently.
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- Now?
- Then I slowly realized
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that she's actually seen a lot,
she just won't admit it.
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Which ones did you watch?
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You know our favorite movie, right?
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- Which one's our favorite?
- Chup Chup Ke.
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- But which ones had you watched?
- Chup Chup Ke.
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Which ones had you seen
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- before meeting him?
- Jab We Met.
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One of my favorites.
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Yes.
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Jab We Met is a great movie.
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Chup Chup Ke, again, I love.
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Shahid didn't speak in that,
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so you must've liked him.
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His dialogues were just "jaba jaba."
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Then before we met,
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about two or three weeks earlier,
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we went to watch Haider.
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But Mom and Dad already knew the context,
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that we were going to meet.
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They got so scared, like…
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"Oh, so this is who she's going to meet."
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No, she watched Haider before the wedding.
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When we were about to get married,
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I was playing Tommy Singh in Udta Punjab.
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- Yes.
- So when I visited her home
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in Delhi for the first time,
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they have a gorgeous farmhouse
in Chhatarpur,
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her dad opened the door.
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For starters, they have a crazy dog.
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- "Crazy dog"?
- What's his name?
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- Bingo.
- Bingo.
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Okay. Now Bingo only sees
one thing in a human.
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What?
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Meat.
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So Dad's on one side, I'm on the other.
My hair was green.
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I showed up sporting the green hair
from Udta Punjab.
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And you had a dog's name too,
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- Tommy Singh.
- Tommy.
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Tommy on one side,
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- Bingo on the other…
- Bingo.
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…and Dad on the third.
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That was the situation.
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When Dad opened the door,
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I stood there with long green hair,
and he said, "Welcome, Son."
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- He paused for a moment.
- He froze.
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And her father is an engineer.
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He's an IIT grad and a very proper…
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Scoring brownie points on TV.
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Definitely. I suddenly remembered
Dad will watch the show too.
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He's an amazing man, and…
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Seeing his personality, I froze.
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Right, how would he know,
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Mira's father,
that it's a look for a movie?
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He'd think this guy dressed up
specially for the visit.
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"Today he dyed his hair green."
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"He might dye it red for the wedding."
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So when he saw me in the Tommy Singh look,
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he honestly froze for a moment.
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- Thinking, "My daughter…"
- Daughter…
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She's so sweet and pretty,
and she's his favorite.
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So he was shocked.
I'll never forget his expression
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when I walked in looking like Tommy Singh.
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And then, when we finished
shooting for Udta Punjab,
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you know, after the completion,
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they call you to the editing room
to show you the film.
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She came with me to watch it,
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and we were newlyweds back then.
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- We were married then, right?
- Yes.
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- So we were sitting here…
- This guy!
00:11:21.160 --> 00:11:22.680 align:center
…and she was sitting right next to me.
00:11:22.760 --> 00:11:23.960 align:center
When the movie ended,
00:11:24.040 --> 00:11:25.880 align:center
she had moved to the far end of the sofa.
00:11:25.960 --> 00:11:28.960 align:center
She got so stressed out,
wondering who she had married.
00:11:30.240 --> 00:11:32.560 align:center
- Because she saw that character…
- Oh, God!
00:11:32.640 --> 00:11:34.480 align:center
…and she was very stressed out.
00:11:34.560 --> 00:11:37.320 align:center
Thank goodness she saw that one.
Imagine getting married after Kabir Singh.
00:11:37.400 --> 00:11:38.720 align:center
She would have left you.
00:11:40.120 --> 00:11:41.560 align:center
She would have left you saying, "Hey…"
00:11:41.640 --> 00:11:43.480 align:center
This is the amazing part.
00:11:43.560 --> 00:11:46.600 align:center
For Kabir Singh,
the original film was Arjun Reddy
00:11:46.680 --> 00:11:48.520 align:center
- which Kabir Singh was based on.
- Yes, yes.
00:11:48.600 --> 00:11:52.200 align:center
The person who watched that film
and told me to do it is her.
00:11:54.760 --> 00:11:56.120 align:center
She told me to do the film.
00:11:56.200 --> 00:11:58.560 align:center
Did you explain to him later
that it was just a movie look?
00:11:58.640 --> 00:12:01.160 align:center
No, he just held back his feelings.
00:12:01.840 --> 00:12:03.960 align:center
You know how fathers of daughters are,
00:12:04.040 --> 00:12:06.920 align:center
- they often just swallow their feelings.
- Yeah.
00:12:07.000 --> 00:12:09.360 align:center
Once my own daughter was born,
I finally understood.
00:12:09.440 --> 00:12:12.600 align:center
So I went and apologized to him.
I said, "I'm very sorry."
00:12:12.680 --> 00:12:13.760 align:center
That's true.
00:12:15.120 --> 00:12:16.160 align:center
Very sweet.
00:12:16.240 --> 00:12:19.280 align:center
Normally, what happens with a man is that,
00:12:19.360 --> 00:12:21.400 align:center
20 or 25 years after marriage,
00:12:21.480 --> 00:12:23.960 align:center
his kids grow up, and he's seen the world.
00:12:24.040 --> 00:12:27.560 align:center
He gets a couple of blood tests,
his cholesterol comes back high,
00:12:27.640 --> 00:12:30.360 align:center
his blood sugar hits the borderline,
and then he remembers God.
00:12:30.440 --> 00:12:32.080 align:center
Then he starts going to prayer meets.
00:12:32.160 --> 00:12:34.640 align:center
You went to prayer meets
even before marriage.
00:12:34.720 --> 00:12:36.160 align:center
You may have met Mira there too.
00:12:36.240 --> 00:12:38.360 align:center
You knew you'd receive
your blessing right there.
00:12:39.600 --> 00:12:42.000 align:center
- We actually heard how they met.
- Actually--
00:12:42.080 --> 00:12:43.840 align:center
Actually, the funny thing is
00:12:44.520 --> 00:12:47.400 align:center
- that my parents went to prayer meets.
- Okay.
00:12:47.480 --> 00:12:50.160 align:center
So they had already scouted her
four or five years earlier.
00:12:50.240 --> 00:12:51.480 align:center
When-- Yeah.
00:12:51.560 --> 00:12:54.200 align:center
When we finally met through our families,
00:12:54.280 --> 00:12:56.080 align:center
the first thing they said was,
00:12:56.160 --> 00:12:58.240 align:center
"She's the girl we saw back then!"
00:12:58.320 --> 00:13:00.800 align:center
So, you know, she is a very pretty girl.
00:13:01.320 --> 00:13:02.280 align:center
Of course.
00:13:04.880 --> 00:13:08.640 align:center
Mira, isn't it true that when a good
eldest daughter-in-law joins the family,
00:13:08.720 --> 00:13:11.480 align:center
the elders in the house
can relax a little?
00:13:11.560 --> 00:13:15.120 align:center
They figure she'll find a great match
for the younger brother too.
00:13:15.200 --> 00:13:18.440 align:center
So do your in-laws tell you
to take him to prayer meets too?
00:13:18.520 --> 00:13:19.960 align:center
That's why we came here.
00:13:20.840 --> 00:13:23.640 align:center
Why should it just be us two?
00:13:23.720 --> 00:13:25.840 align:center
Now find someone for him too.
00:13:25.920 --> 00:13:28.800 align:center
Do you feel pressured as
the eldest daughter-in-law…
00:13:28.880 --> 00:13:30.240 align:center
No, she feels zero pressure.
00:13:30.320 --> 00:13:32.200 align:center
She thoroughly enjoys this.
00:13:32.280 --> 00:13:35.840 align:center
She has a whole list… a list of vetoes.
00:13:35.920 --> 00:13:37.920 align:center
"This won't work, that won't work."
00:13:38.560 --> 00:13:40.440 align:center
- It's not like that.
- Tell them the list.
00:13:40.520 --> 00:13:43.560 align:center
The very first thing she told me
was that when I get married,
00:13:43.640 --> 00:13:45.880 align:center
she'll make all the wedding decisions.
00:13:45.960 --> 00:13:47.720 align:center
We just care about the baby.
00:13:48.720 --> 00:13:50.480 align:center
Yes, we want a baby now.
00:13:50.560 --> 00:13:54.440 align:center
He can marry whoever he wants.
Both our kids are growing up now.
00:13:54.520 --> 00:13:55.720 align:center
I want a small baby.
00:13:58.320 --> 00:14:00.200 align:center
They set the rules early,
00:14:00.280 --> 00:14:02.960 align:center
"You won't make any decisions.
Just show up quietly."
00:14:03.880 --> 00:14:07.520 align:center
Any girl watching the show will wonder,
"How can I marry Ishaan?"
00:14:07.600 --> 00:14:09.680 align:center
"His brother and bhabhi
will decide everything."
00:14:09.760 --> 00:14:11.440 align:center
We want her to call us first.
00:14:12.880 --> 00:14:14.840 align:center
Then we'll bring her along.
00:14:16.200 --> 00:14:17.840 align:center
Guys, why are you standing? Please.
00:14:17.920 --> 00:14:20.520 align:center
Give it up, everyone!
Today is going to be so much fun.
00:14:25.320 --> 00:14:28.760 align:center
As you all know, Shahid has been
entertaining you for years.
00:14:28.840 --> 00:14:32.240 align:center
Raised in Mumbai, built a film career,
and became such a huge star.
00:14:32.320 --> 00:14:33.960 align:center
And after doing all that,
00:14:34.040 --> 00:14:36.800 align:center
his control landed
right in the hands of Delhi's Mira.
00:14:37.880 --> 00:14:41.280 align:center
Admit it, folks, whether a country
or a husband, Delhi is in control.
00:14:48.120 --> 00:14:50.720 align:center
It depends on where the wife sits.
00:14:51.440 --> 00:14:54.560 align:center
If the wife sits in Jalandhar,
control is from Jalandhar.
00:14:54.640 --> 00:14:55.640 align:center
Yeah.
00:14:58.080 --> 00:15:00.480 align:center
Shahid, did you ever make
a few trips to Delhi before marriage?
00:15:00.560 --> 00:15:03.840 align:center
Just dropping by with an excuse,
like, "I was there for a shoot"
00:15:03.920 --> 00:15:05.000 align:center
- To meet her?
- Yes.
00:15:05.080 --> 00:15:06.120 align:center
Yes, of course.
00:15:06.200 --> 00:15:08.920 align:center
I was always looking for a chance.
00:15:09.000 --> 00:15:10.480 align:center
I want to know when…
00:15:10.560 --> 00:15:12.640 align:center
- I came so often, babe, sweetheart.
- …you came to Delhi.
00:15:12.720 --> 00:15:14.000 align:center
What are you talking about?
00:15:14.640 --> 00:15:16.800 align:center
- Didn't I visit you enough?
- A few times.
00:15:17.400 --> 00:15:20.600 align:center
I thought you used to feel like,
"Here he comes again."
00:15:21.760 --> 00:15:26.680 align:center
I was older. So I felt like, being 13
years older, you can't look desperate.
00:15:27.360 --> 00:15:29.920 align:center
You have to act really relaxed,
like it's no big deal.
00:15:30.000 --> 00:15:31.240 align:center
"This old man showed up at home."
00:15:32.640 --> 00:15:36.280 align:center
Besides the beard,
I see no change in Shahid.
00:15:36.360 --> 00:15:39.720 align:center
Take your first song.
You must've been 18 or 19 years old in it.
00:15:39.800 --> 00:15:42.600 align:center
- Yes, 17 or 18 years old.
- And I've never seen any difference.
00:15:42.680 --> 00:15:45.240 align:center
Even in your looks,
we only know because you tell us.
00:15:45.320 --> 00:15:47.360 align:center
We can't really tell
there's a 13-year gap.
00:15:47.440 --> 00:15:49.920 align:center
That's not very nice.
That's not so good for me.
00:15:53.040 --> 00:15:55.400 align:center
Shahid and Mira
have been married for 11 years.
00:15:55.480 --> 00:15:56.360 align:center
They have three kids.
00:15:57.080 --> 00:15:59.320 align:center
I know they have two, plus this third.
He's a kid too, right?
00:15:59.400 --> 00:16:00.800 align:center
- Yes, absolutely.
- Their first kid.
00:16:00.880 --> 00:16:04.760 align:center
One kid was born before the wedding.
Two were born after.
00:16:05.440 --> 00:16:08.680 align:center
I call him a kid because when he was
little, Shahid changed his diapers.
00:16:09.400 --> 00:16:12.520 align:center
With such an age gap between brothers,
the older one changes diapers.
00:16:12.600 --> 00:16:15.040 align:center
I changed his diapers as a kid,
00:16:15.120 --> 00:16:17.480 align:center
and he says he'll change mine
when I'm old.
00:16:22.800 --> 00:16:24.080 align:center
In installments.
00:16:24.160 --> 00:16:26.080 align:center
Somehow, I'll have to
00:16:26.160 --> 00:16:28.640 align:center
- pay him back in full.
- You can do that much for me.
00:16:30.160 --> 00:16:32.480 align:center
You both earn your own money.
00:16:32.560 --> 00:16:35.840 align:center
Still, you're the same size.
Do you ever wear each other's clothes?
00:16:35.920 --> 00:16:37.120 align:center
I've worn a lot of his clothes,
00:16:37.200 --> 00:16:39.120 align:center
and when he didn't give them,
his leftovers.
00:16:39.200 --> 00:16:42.200 align:center
He'd force his way into it
when he was 15 or 16 years old.
00:16:42.280 --> 00:16:45.760 align:center
At first, I adored him
because I rarely saw him.
00:16:45.840 --> 00:16:49.160 align:center
I was busy shooting here and there.
I barely saw him in life.
00:16:49.240 --> 00:16:52.880 align:center
So whenever we met,
I'd give him a T-shirt or something.
00:16:52.960 --> 00:16:57.480 align:center
Then I noticed this guy showed up
one day with a wet T-shirt,
00:16:58.080 --> 00:17:02.680 align:center
one day with a dirty T-shirt,
one day in shorts, "Bro, I'm going out."
00:17:02.760 --> 00:17:06.760 align:center
I realized he makes excuses,
takes my clothes, and never returns them.
00:17:07.920 --> 00:17:10.839 align:center
Once I went to his room,
and he said, "Bro, come here."
00:17:10.920 --> 00:17:12.400 align:center
He took me to his closet,
00:17:12.480 --> 00:17:15.000 align:center
pointed to one side, and said,
"These are all your clothes."
00:17:15.079 --> 00:17:17.440 align:center
- That's wonderful. How sweet!
- How sweet!
00:17:18.400 --> 00:17:19.319 align:center
So sweet.
00:17:21.160 --> 00:17:24.160 align:center
When a younger brother tries to join
his older brother's group,
00:17:24.240 --> 00:17:27.359 align:center
the older brother rarely lets him,
"Go play with your own friends."
00:17:27.440 --> 00:17:29.359 align:center
Then, after a certain age,
00:17:29.440 --> 00:17:31.720 align:center
when the younger one learns
all the older one's secrets,
00:17:31.800 --> 00:17:34.120 align:center
- he slowly goes from brother to friend.
- Yeah.
00:17:34.200 --> 00:17:37.360 align:center
Has he become your friend now,
or is he still the little brother?
00:17:37.440 --> 00:17:42.160 align:center
The funny angle is that he wants me
to become close friends with his friends.
00:17:42.240 --> 00:17:45.080 align:center
- Okay.
- Which I keep avoiding.
00:17:45.160 --> 00:17:48.000 align:center
Because I feel like
there's only so much Ishaan I can handle.
00:17:48.080 --> 00:17:51.480 align:center
If more young people come
with Ishaan's volume and intensity…
00:17:51.560 --> 00:17:53.520 align:center
- Yeah.
- …I'll start feeling old.
00:17:53.600 --> 00:17:56.240 align:center
So I have to keep myself young.
That's my job, you know.
00:17:56.320 --> 00:17:58.400 align:center
He tries really hard at that.
00:17:58.480 --> 00:18:00.360 align:center
- Who said that--
- And he's always been in my group.
00:18:00.440 --> 00:18:03.040 align:center
I mean, there was never a time
you weren't in my group.
00:18:03.120 --> 00:18:05.880 align:center
Have you gone out to party
with him and his friends?
00:18:05.960 --> 00:18:08.160 align:center
Actually, I really enjoy
hanging with his friends
00:18:08.240 --> 00:18:11.760 align:center
because I feel their outlook
on life is very different.
00:18:11.840 --> 00:18:13.120 align:center
I feel the generation changes
00:18:13.200 --> 00:18:14.600 align:center
- every five years.
- Absolutely.
00:18:14.680 --> 00:18:16.760 align:center
So when I listen to them, I realize
00:18:16.840 --> 00:18:20.120 align:center
that there's a big difference
in how they think versus how we think.
00:18:20.200 --> 00:18:23.080 align:center
Now I feel like the generation
changes every two months.
00:18:23.160 --> 00:18:24.480 align:center
Yes, true.
00:18:24.560 --> 00:18:26.600 align:center
Yes. The kids being born now…
00:18:27.880 --> 00:18:29.480 align:center
Who knows if we can handle them.
00:18:31.120 --> 00:18:33.360 align:center
No matter how many secrets
the younger brother knows,
00:18:33.440 --> 00:18:35.160 align:center
he tells his brother nothing.
00:18:35.240 --> 00:18:36.920 align:center
- Yes.
- He befriends his bhabhi,
00:18:37.000 --> 00:18:41.240 align:center
thinking that later on
she'll help him out if he's seeing someone
00:18:41.320 --> 00:18:43.800 align:center
or if there's someone he wants to marry.
00:18:43.880 --> 00:18:46.760 align:center
Do you share your secrets with Mira?
00:18:46.840 --> 00:18:47.760 align:center
I do.
00:18:47.840 --> 00:18:51.120 align:center
What happens with me is,
I'm working these days,
00:18:51.200 --> 00:18:53.800 align:center
so when I go meet them after a few weeks,
00:18:53.880 --> 00:18:56.200 align:center
we usually meet
at the dining table over dinner,
00:18:56.280 --> 00:18:58.280 align:center
and it turns into a lively gathering.
00:18:58.360 --> 00:19:01.560 align:center
Then they sit me down, and I suddenly
realize I'm on the witness stand.
00:19:03.320 --> 00:19:04.240 align:center
It's like, and…
00:19:04.320 --> 00:19:06.000 align:center
- First, we feed him.
- "Spill."
00:19:06.080 --> 00:19:08.560 align:center
- "What's going on?"
- "What's going on?"
00:19:08.640 --> 00:19:10.680 align:center
Before I even swallow a bite, it begins.
00:19:11.360 --> 00:19:13.880 align:center
Bhabhis shift genres really fast.
00:19:13.960 --> 00:19:15.040 align:center
First, it's a comedy scene,
00:19:15.120 --> 00:19:16.880 align:center
"Oh, you're visiting after so long!"
00:19:17.600 --> 00:19:20.280 align:center
Then an emotional scene starts suddenly,
00:19:20.360 --> 00:19:22.320 align:center
"You left, and then this and that."
00:19:22.400 --> 00:19:24.960 align:center
And suddenly the interrogation starts,
"So tell me."
00:19:26.000 --> 00:19:28.040 align:center
And all this happens in two minutes.
00:19:29.480 --> 00:19:31.600 align:center
The genre shifts in two minutes.
00:19:31.680 --> 00:19:34.920 align:center
And we really thought
we were the actors at home.
00:19:35.000 --> 00:19:37.800 align:center
But most of the time,
the most common thing is,
00:19:37.880 --> 00:19:39.480 align:center
this gentleman arrives,
00:19:39.560 --> 00:19:42.000 align:center
drops his shoes
in the middle of the house,
00:19:42.080 --> 00:19:43.760 align:center
and then vanishes somewhere.
00:19:44.400 --> 00:19:46.080 align:center
So last time, the poor guy came over.
00:19:47.120 --> 00:19:47.960 align:center
Are we doing this?
00:19:49.280 --> 00:19:50.920 align:center
Are we, Mira?
00:19:51.000 --> 00:19:53.680 align:center
- Please, please do it, do it.
- Politely.
00:19:54.520 --> 00:19:57.760 align:center
So Mom is sitting there too,
and we're chatting,
00:19:57.840 --> 00:20:00.160 align:center
and something flies over our heads.
00:20:00.240 --> 00:20:03.040 align:center
Nobody has any idea who is saying what.
00:20:03.120 --> 00:20:06.040 align:center
At some point,
these two start going at it.
00:20:06.120 --> 00:20:09.680 align:center
"I've been telling you this for so long,
you just don't listen to me."
00:20:09.760 --> 00:20:13.080 align:center
"But what do you mean?
I just did it this one time."
00:20:13.160 --> 00:20:14.640 align:center
What is it about?
00:20:14.720 --> 00:20:16.320 align:center
Shoes in the middle of the room.
00:20:16.400 --> 00:20:18.080 align:center
"Enough is enough, Ishaan.
00:20:18.160 --> 00:20:21.120 align:center
"You have to start following
the rules of this house."
00:20:21.200 --> 00:20:25.320 align:center
Honey, it's Diwali. The brief
was that we're a very happy family.
00:20:27.560 --> 00:20:29.400 align:center
Follow the brief.
00:20:32.320 --> 00:20:34.440 align:center
And Mira's solution to this problem…
00:20:34.520 --> 00:20:36.320 align:center
She struggled for the first few months,
00:20:36.400 --> 00:20:38.600 align:center
like, "What do we do? What do I do?"
00:20:38.680 --> 00:20:39.600 align:center
Now her fix is,
00:20:39.680 --> 00:20:41.760 align:center
whether my friends or Ishaan are over,
00:20:41.840 --> 00:20:44.400 align:center
or even if Mom is over,
Mira suddenly disappears.
00:20:45.320 --> 00:20:48.040 align:center
Forty-five minutes later, you realize,
"Where's Mira?"
00:20:48.120 --> 00:20:49.160 align:center
Mira's fast asleep.
00:20:50.560 --> 00:20:52.960 align:center
Whether it's afternoon,
morning, or evening.
00:20:53.040 --> 00:20:53.920 align:center
Rubbish.
00:20:54.000 --> 00:20:56.800 align:center
Her time-out is like
when we watch basketball,
00:20:56.880 --> 00:20:58.480 align:center
and the coach chews gum.
00:21:01.120 --> 00:21:03.000 align:center
It's a time-out you see in the matches.
00:21:03.080 --> 00:21:05.080 align:center
- That is not true.
- She takes a 40-minute break
00:21:05.160 --> 00:21:06.200 align:center
from the Kapoors,
00:21:06.280 --> 00:21:09.960 align:center
and then comes back like,
"Oh, what's happening? Nothing. I just…"
00:21:10.040 --> 00:21:11.880 align:center
"You know, my hair has become frizzy."
00:21:11.960 --> 00:21:14.440 align:center
- No, nothing like that.
- She was sleeping on the bed.
00:21:14.520 --> 00:21:16.040 align:center
- Not true.
- "I can't take it."
00:21:16.120 --> 00:21:18.920 align:center
When these two start talking
about serious cinema,
00:21:19.000 --> 00:21:21.440 align:center
I take a little silence break.
00:21:21.520 --> 00:21:24.760 align:center
Then you fall asleep
right there at the dining table.
00:21:27.000 --> 00:21:31.000 align:center
Ishaan, tell me,
you've known Shahid since childhood.
00:21:31.640 --> 00:21:35.960 align:center
Has Shahid changed at all after marriage,
or is he the same as before?
00:21:36.040 --> 00:21:38.240 align:center
For one, he looks even younger.
00:21:41.680 --> 00:21:42.640 align:center
That's true.
00:21:43.200 --> 00:21:47.240 align:center
- Any other changes you see?
- Also, you brought up earlier
00:21:47.320 --> 00:21:48.680 align:center
how the younger brother wants
00:21:48.760 --> 00:21:51.000 align:center
- to be more involved in the friend group.
- Right.
00:21:51.080 --> 00:21:55.360 align:center
So his biking trips
have increased quite a bit
00:21:55.440 --> 00:21:57.320 align:center
because he's now realized that,
00:21:57.400 --> 00:22:00.120 align:center
"Either I give time to family
as a husband and father,
00:22:00.200 --> 00:22:02.320 align:center
"or I give time to work,"
00:22:02.400 --> 00:22:06.720 align:center
and once all that is done, both kids
come and jump on him early in the morning.
00:22:06.800 --> 00:22:10.600 align:center
He gets no time for himself.
So he takes off on these trips.
00:22:10.680 --> 00:22:14.400 align:center
So my goal was to figure out
how to crash these bike trips.
00:22:14.480 --> 00:22:16.480 align:center
Basically, "How do I barge in
00:22:16.560 --> 00:22:19.920 align:center
when he's barely
found some personal time to go off alone?"
00:22:20.000 --> 00:22:20.840 align:center
Even into that.
00:22:22.720 --> 00:22:25.560 align:center
Look at Ishaan,
he's following in Shahid's footsteps.
00:22:25.640 --> 00:22:27.640 align:center
He's a fantastic actor,
00:22:27.720 --> 00:22:29.120 align:center
has a great physique,
00:22:29.200 --> 00:22:30.960 align:center
and he's an amazing dancer.
00:22:31.040 --> 00:22:34.640 align:center
Shahid, is there any footstep
you'd rather Ishaan didn't follow?
00:22:34.720 --> 00:22:37.920 align:center
I think since I got married quite late,,
00:22:38.000 --> 00:22:39.960 align:center
he should just go ahead and do it now.
00:22:41.400 --> 00:22:44.400 align:center
Why, Shahid? Why shouldn't he marry late?
00:22:44.480 --> 00:22:47.240 align:center
I feel that until you get married,
00:22:47.800 --> 00:22:51.560 align:center
especially for men,
you think your work is your whole life.
00:22:51.640 --> 00:22:53.920 align:center
- True.
- But once you get married,
00:22:54.000 --> 00:22:57.360 align:center
you realize
that this is work, and this is life.
00:22:57.440 --> 00:22:59.920 align:center
- Brilliant.
- Second, my son is eight years old,
00:23:00.000 --> 00:23:03.160 align:center
and he loves cricket and soccer,
so I wonder
00:23:03.240 --> 00:23:06.240 align:center
how long I'll be able to play with him.
There's that feeling too.
00:23:06.320 --> 00:23:08.120 align:center
My daughter loves climbing,
00:23:08.200 --> 00:23:12.520 align:center
so I want to be able to do those things
with them till they grow up.
00:23:12.600 --> 00:23:15.360 align:center
When you become a father while young,
00:23:15.440 --> 00:23:18.240 align:center
- you can do so many things with your kids.
- Can do many things.
00:23:18.320 --> 00:23:20.480 align:center
- If you become a parent a bit late…
- Right.
00:23:20.560 --> 00:23:23.200 align:center
…you can't do as much,
and the child feels that
00:23:23.280 --> 00:23:24.840 align:center
because kids love to share.
00:23:24.920 --> 00:23:26.480 align:center
Are you an indulgent father or…
00:23:26.560 --> 00:23:29.680 align:center
- Extremely. He spoils them a lot…
- Really?
00:23:29.760 --> 00:23:31.360 align:center
…but not in a bad way.
00:23:31.440 --> 00:23:33.880 align:center
- With so much love…
- He rides fast, but very safely.
00:23:33.960 --> 00:23:36.120 align:center
He spoils the kids,
"but not in a bad way."
00:23:36.680 --> 00:23:38.880 align:center
- I mean, I'm so strict.
- Yes?
00:23:38.960 --> 00:23:40.120 align:center
And he tells me,
00:23:40.200 --> 00:23:43.280 align:center
"Don't do this, don't do that,
don't feed them that."
00:23:43.360 --> 00:23:45.400 align:center
Then the kids come, and he's like,
"Of course, sure,
00:23:45.480 --> 00:23:47.080 align:center
oh, it's just Sunday."
00:23:47.160 --> 00:23:51.240 align:center
And the best quality about him is
that every morning when the kids…
00:23:51.320 --> 00:23:52.880 align:center
As soon as they wake up,
00:23:52.960 --> 00:23:56.240 align:center
they go straight and jump
on top of him in the morning.
00:23:56.960 --> 00:23:59.920 align:center
And nothing, not a peep.
No "Don't do that, do this."
00:24:00.000 --> 00:24:01.960 align:center
Even if he's back at 3:00 a.m…
00:24:02.040 --> 00:24:04.120 align:center
he never snaps at the kids.
00:24:04.200 --> 00:24:07.360 align:center
He just cuddles them like this…
00:24:07.440 --> 00:24:09.240 align:center
then they're happy and content.
00:24:09.320 --> 00:24:11.120 align:center
So he is very indulgent with his love.
00:24:11.760 --> 00:24:12.600 align:center
Wonderful!
00:24:14.160 --> 00:24:18.160 align:center
Well, you've sung for all kinds
of actresses in movies.
00:24:18.240 --> 00:24:19.720 align:center
- Today, your personal--
- Yes, yes.
00:24:19.800 --> 00:24:21.360 align:center
When did I sing for them?
00:24:21.440 --> 00:24:23.800 align:center
By actresses, I mean the ones
who played your wives.
00:24:23.880 --> 00:24:25.120 align:center
Played my wives?
00:24:25.200 --> 00:24:27.840 align:center
- In different movies.
- Whom are you talking about?
00:24:27.920 --> 00:24:29.640 align:center
Man, the guy flat-out denied it!
00:24:29.720 --> 00:24:31.800 align:center
- I have no clue what you're saying.
- Shahid bhai…
00:24:31.880 --> 00:24:35.520 align:center
- Sing a couple of lines for Mira. Yes.
- Should I?
00:24:37.920 --> 00:24:39.280 align:center
- Great!
- "Intoxicated"?
00:24:39.920 --> 00:24:41.280 align:center
It's "rosy"!
00:24:43.800 --> 00:24:47.720 align:center
Mira got totally stressed out!
"Intoxicated? What are you saying?"
00:25:10.760 --> 00:25:12.080 align:center
Mira!
00:25:23.600 --> 00:25:24.680 align:center
Awesome!
00:25:28.960 --> 00:25:31.080 align:center
Let's hear it for Shahid bhai!
00:25:34.400 --> 00:25:37.760 align:center
Whatever happens with the show,
I got a meme for the family chat.
00:25:37.840 --> 00:25:40.000 align:center
- Ishaan, tell me something.
- "Intoxicated eyes." Yes?
00:25:40.080 --> 00:25:41.920 align:center
You know your brother so well.
00:25:42.000 --> 00:25:43.880 align:center
Has it ever crossed your mind,
00:25:43.960 --> 00:25:46.600 align:center
thinking of some habit of Shahid's,
to ask Mira,
00:25:46.680 --> 00:25:48.600 align:center
"Bhabhi, how do you put up with him?"
00:25:48.680 --> 00:25:50.000 align:center
Is there anything like that?
00:25:50.640 --> 00:25:54.480 align:center
- No, no--
- Say it, man. Let loose today.
00:25:54.560 --> 00:25:55.960 align:center
- Should I?
- Yes.
00:25:56.040 --> 00:25:57.400 align:center
With me, every little time,
00:25:57.480 --> 00:26:01.680 align:center
if I ever accidentally come close
to winning an argument,
00:26:01.760 --> 00:26:03.680 align:center
it's always, "Who's the older one?"
00:26:03.760 --> 00:26:05.520 align:center
"Who changed your diapers?
Who's the older one?"
00:26:05.600 --> 00:26:08.120 align:center
So now I've just given up.
00:26:08.200 --> 00:26:10.280 align:center
You know the white flag?
I've waved it like this,
00:26:10.360 --> 00:26:12.000 align:center
- I won't argue with him.
- Surrender.
00:26:12.080 --> 00:26:13.320 align:center
A peace treaty has been signed.
00:26:13.400 --> 00:26:17.080 align:center
Yes, so what are your tricks?
You tell me. But I--
00:26:17.160 --> 00:26:19.440 align:center
That was your question, not mine.
00:26:23.920 --> 00:26:26.960 align:center
Yes, so let me tell you
about one of his biggest contributions.
00:26:27.040 --> 00:26:29.680 align:center
He's my elder brother, but honestly,
00:26:29.760 --> 00:26:31.800 align:center
he's been like a father figure to me.
00:26:31.880 --> 00:26:34.720 align:center
But the biggest contribution, actually,
I haven't told you this yet.
00:26:34.800 --> 00:26:36.720 align:center
The role I'm about to play
00:26:36.800 --> 00:26:39.000 align:center
- in Season 2 of Royals.
- Royals.
00:26:39.080 --> 00:26:41.800 align:center
- It's about a brother and sister.
- Yes.
00:26:41.880 --> 00:26:43.920 align:center
It's a very sweet relationship.
00:26:44.000 --> 00:26:47.120 align:center
- I play the older brother in it.
- Oh, so revenge time.
00:26:47.200 --> 00:26:51.440 align:center
Yes, so now you'll see
for that older brother role,
00:26:51.520 --> 00:26:53.920 align:center
where I actually got my inspiration from.
00:26:54.960 --> 00:26:58.360 align:center
It's just full-on drama
and daily fights galore!
00:26:58.440 --> 00:27:00.960 align:center
The younger brother keeps getting
beaten for no specific reason!
00:27:01.040 --> 00:27:04.120 align:center
So I channeled him. You'll see
when the show comes out in a few months.
00:27:07.320 --> 00:27:09.800 align:center
We found some lovely pictures, bhai,
of the three of you.
00:27:09.880 --> 00:27:12.080 align:center
There are some funny comments on them.
00:27:12.160 --> 00:27:13.760 align:center
We'd love to show you. Please take a look!
00:27:13.840 --> 00:27:19.720 align:center
KOMMENTER'S KRAVING
00:27:21.800 --> 00:27:23.320 align:center
Mira posted this photo.
00:27:23.400 --> 00:27:24.840 align:center
- Right, with ma'am--
- Two Shahids!
00:27:24.920 --> 00:27:26.720 align:center
- In Singapore?
- There are two of him.
00:27:26.800 --> 00:27:29.120 align:center
- You need to guess the real one.
- Which one is the real one?
00:27:29.200 --> 00:27:30.040 align:center
You tell me.
00:27:30.840 --> 00:27:31.880 align:center
The one on this side.
00:27:33.640 --> 00:27:36.680 align:center
- Both look real. Very well-made.
- Fantastic.
00:27:36.760 --> 00:27:39.960 align:center
"When one plus one is equal to eleven.
Happy anniversary, love of my life."
00:27:40.560 --> 00:27:41.840 align:center
Let's see the comments.
00:27:42.560 --> 00:27:44.920 align:center
The comment says,
"Whichever one melts first is real."
00:27:49.120 --> 00:27:50.200 align:center
Bravo!
00:27:50.280 --> 00:27:52.400 align:center
That's so poetic,
what a deep point they made.
00:27:52.480 --> 00:27:53.320 align:center
Show us more.
00:27:53.400 --> 00:27:55.880 align:center
"One of them is Shahid,
and the other is shaheed."
00:27:57.520 --> 00:27:59.040 align:center
This was too good!
00:28:00.840 --> 00:28:01.680 align:center
Show us more.
00:28:02.800 --> 00:28:06.280 align:center
"Left one or right one, a husband
is just a puppet in his wife's hands."
00:28:08.520 --> 00:28:10.120 align:center
Well said, bhaisahab!
00:28:12.800 --> 00:28:13.760 align:center
Show us more.
00:28:14.960 --> 00:28:17.760 align:center
"What will you do with two?
Give one to me, please."
00:28:20.400 --> 00:28:21.240 align:center
Show us more.
00:28:22.160 --> 00:28:25.080 align:center
"Roam around, be happy." Shahid bhai,
where is this from? Great picture.
00:28:25.160 --> 00:28:26.480 align:center
This is from Goa.
00:28:26.560 --> 00:28:29.560 align:center
- For a shoot or a trip?
- No, just to roam around and be happy.
00:28:31.800 --> 00:28:32.920 align:center
Let's see the comments.
00:28:33.680 --> 00:28:34.840 align:center
"Bhai, write the entire thing."
00:28:34.920 --> 00:28:38.000 align:center
"Live it up and enjoy yourself until your
wife gets back from her parents' house."
00:28:39.400 --> 00:28:41.400 align:center
Why do people always make
such sarcastic comments?
00:28:43.080 --> 00:28:44.000 align:center
Show us more.
00:28:45.040 --> 00:28:48.000 align:center
"Bhai, if the menu's too pricey,
fake a phone call and slip out,
00:28:48.080 --> 00:28:49.720 align:center
no need to stress out like this."
00:28:50.360 --> 00:28:51.640 align:center
I've actually done this in life.
00:28:52.960 --> 00:28:54.840 align:center
Before becoming an actor.
00:28:55.560 --> 00:28:56.680 align:center
Show us more.
00:28:57.240 --> 00:29:00.040 align:center
"He'll read the whole menu just to order
dal, roti, and paneer."
00:29:00.120 --> 00:29:01.240 align:center
- Yes!
- Very true.
00:29:01.320 --> 00:29:02.160 align:center
That is true.
00:29:02.800 --> 00:29:04.560 align:center
- I love dal, roti, and paneer.
- This is true.
00:29:04.640 --> 00:29:05.480 align:center
- It's true.
- Really!
00:29:05.560 --> 00:29:07.240 align:center
- Evergreen food.
- I'm a vegetarian. I love it.
00:29:07.800 --> 00:29:08.800 align:center
Show us more.
00:29:09.680 --> 00:29:13.880 align:center
His friend Kunal Kemmu is still
in the restroom, and the bill has arrived.
00:29:16.720 --> 00:29:20.840 align:center
Special mention to Kunal Kemmu
in this Diwali episode.
00:29:21.360 --> 00:29:22.360 align:center
Show us more.
00:29:23.960 --> 00:29:26.840 align:center
"I've been seeing your messages,
letters, essays…" Too long, man.
00:29:27.760 --> 00:29:29.080 align:center
Let's read the comments below.
00:29:30.640 --> 00:29:33.600 align:center
"You can tell from his face
that it's an arranged marriage."
00:29:38.000 --> 00:29:38.960 align:center
Yes, show us more.
00:29:40.440 --> 00:29:43.960 align:center
"Someone told him to think twice
before marrying, so he's thinking."
00:29:44.040 --> 00:29:46.120 align:center
"As for understanding marriage,
no one ever has."
00:29:50.160 --> 00:29:51.440 align:center
Show us more.
00:29:52.440 --> 00:29:54.480 align:center
"When you're waiting
for your wedding night,
00:29:54.560 --> 00:29:57.360 align:center
and your bua says
one more ritual is left."
00:30:02.160 --> 00:30:03.000 align:center
Show us more.
00:30:05.720 --> 00:30:08.280 align:center
"With you, I have it all.
Without you, I have some."
00:30:08.360 --> 00:30:10.240 align:center
- Who's "you"?
- "Without you, I have nothing."
00:30:10.320 --> 00:30:12.200 align:center
- In this caption.
- Ask this bhaisahab.
00:30:12.280 --> 00:30:13.640 align:center
What does the poet mean, bhaisahab?
00:30:13.720 --> 00:30:17.200 align:center
I swear, I was thinking the picture
and the caption didn't match.
00:30:17.280 --> 00:30:19.280 align:center
- I was in Goa.
- Right.
00:30:19.360 --> 00:30:22.000 align:center
You know, things like this happen in Goa,
just like that.
00:30:22.560 --> 00:30:23.840 align:center
Let's check the comments.
00:30:24.880 --> 00:30:27.080 align:center
"'With you, I have it all.
Without you, I have nothing.'"
00:30:27.160 --> 00:30:29.120 align:center
"I know what you're talking about.
Petrol."
00:30:33.840 --> 00:30:35.600 align:center
That's the best comment
from today's episode.
00:30:35.680 --> 00:30:37.160 align:center
Show us more.
00:30:38.160 --> 00:30:40.960 align:center
"Bro, this bike's exhaust is
way too high."
00:30:41.040 --> 00:30:43.800 align:center
"The passenger in the back
could burn both of their paav."
00:30:43.880 --> 00:30:44.960 align:center
- Paav!
- Oh, my God!
00:30:45.040 --> 00:30:46.760 align:center
- Both "paav"?
- "Paav."
00:30:46.840 --> 00:30:48.360 align:center
Both paav.
00:30:48.440 --> 00:30:49.400 align:center
Does he mean butt?
00:30:49.480 --> 00:30:50.680 align:center
Yes!
00:30:50.760 --> 00:30:53.200 align:center
The exhaust is so hot
that it burned his butt.
00:30:54.080 --> 00:30:56.080 align:center
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:30:57.920 --> 00:30:59.640 align:center
Just picturing it cracks me up.
00:31:00.680 --> 00:31:01.640 align:center
Show us more.
00:31:03.000 --> 00:31:05.840 align:center
"Shahid bhai stopped here.
This must be Mira Road."
00:31:09.240 --> 00:31:13.520 align:center
- Bravo!
- Brilliant, man. Awesome.
00:31:14.440 --> 00:31:15.640 align:center
- Show us more.
- Good one.
00:31:16.840 --> 00:31:21.800 align:center
"When nature calls on the highway,
I also look around first,
00:31:21.880 --> 00:31:24.560 align:center
assess the situation,
and then proceed with the operation."
00:31:28.520 --> 00:31:29.520 align:center
Show us more.
00:31:31.320 --> 00:31:32.520 align:center
- All done?
- All done.
00:31:35.800 --> 00:31:38.320 align:center
Look, we'll play a game today.
00:31:38.400 --> 00:31:41.040 align:center
On one side is his brother,
and on the other, his wife.
00:31:41.120 --> 00:31:44.280 align:center
Let's see who understands you better.
00:31:44.360 --> 00:31:45.360 align:center
Oh, good.
00:31:45.440 --> 00:31:48.480 align:center
So the game requires Ishaan
and Mira to wear headphones.
00:31:48.560 --> 00:31:51.120 align:center
- Okay.
- I'll ask them some questions.
00:31:51.200 --> 00:31:53.760 align:center
Then I'll confirm with you
whether they got it right or not.
00:31:53.840 --> 00:31:56.520 align:center
Ladies and gentlemen, we're playing this
game for the first time.
00:32:05.880 --> 00:32:08.320 align:center
Shahid bhai, who was your teenage crush?
00:32:08.400 --> 00:32:09.920 align:center
- My teenage crush?
- Yes.
00:32:10.520 --> 00:32:12.760 align:center
I don't want to say that on camera.
00:32:12.840 --> 00:32:14.200 align:center
Spit it out, it doesn't matter.
00:32:14.840 --> 00:32:15.920 align:center
Come on, say it.
00:32:16.000 --> 00:32:19.560 align:center
I had a crush.
There was a girl called Reshma.
00:32:19.640 --> 00:32:21.920 align:center
- Is Reshma an actor?
- No, a childhood crush.
00:32:22.000 --> 00:32:24.200 align:center
- Does she know?
- I don't think so.
00:32:24.880 --> 00:32:26.520 align:center
I hope I don't get you in trouble.
00:32:26.600 --> 00:32:29.080 align:center
No, nobody knows her.
00:32:29.160 --> 00:32:30.880 align:center
- He doesn't either?
- Reshma may not either.
00:32:30.960 --> 00:32:33.680 align:center
- Neither of them knows? Let's ask and see.
- No chance.
00:32:33.760 --> 00:32:36.920 align:center
Shahid, she will take some other name
which you do not want
00:32:37.680 --> 00:32:39.240 align:center
other people to know.
00:32:40.680 --> 00:32:43.120 align:center
- Okay, guys.
- It's too late now.
00:32:43.200 --> 00:32:44.640 align:center
- Both say in one go?
- One by one.
00:32:45.440 --> 00:32:48.240 align:center
Mira, do you know if Shahid
00:32:48.320 --> 00:32:50.200 align:center
had any teenage crush?
00:32:51.160 --> 00:32:52.000 align:center
- Yes.
- Who?
00:32:52.080 --> 00:32:52.920 align:center
Who?
00:32:53.480 --> 00:32:55.840 align:center
- That neighbor of yours.
- Do you remember her name?
00:32:55.920 --> 00:32:57.160 align:center
- Yeah.
- Who?
00:32:57.240 --> 00:32:59.680 align:center
- I mean, I don't know if I can say it.
- I already said it.
00:33:01.120 --> 00:33:02.000 align:center
Is it…
00:33:03.520 --> 00:33:05.320 align:center
- Say it, say it without any hesitation.
- Reshma.
00:33:05.400 --> 00:33:06.720 align:center
Reshma!
00:33:10.240 --> 00:33:11.360 align:center
You hit the nail on the head.
00:33:11.440 --> 00:33:12.440 align:center
Crazy!
00:33:12.520 --> 00:33:15.800 align:center
Listen, now we know what you two
yapped about for seven hours.
00:33:16.440 --> 00:33:18.000 align:center
- All of this was shared.
- That's insane!
00:33:18.080 --> 00:33:21.360 align:center
I can't hear anything in these,
but I can hear the echo of victory.
00:33:21.440 --> 00:33:23.520 align:center
- Listen, please lose now.
- This is so unfair to me!
00:33:23.600 --> 00:33:27.680 align:center
- I asked Shahid--
- I just want to say,
00:33:28.240 --> 00:33:30.200 align:center
since I know he'll get it wrong,
00:33:30.280 --> 00:33:32.040 align:center
- that's why I'm defending him.
- Hey…
00:33:32.120 --> 00:33:34.440 align:center
- Yes.
- He was six or seven months old
00:33:34.520 --> 00:33:36.280 align:center
when I had a crush on her.
00:33:37.080 --> 00:33:39.320 align:center
So if he doesn't know,
it's not his fault--
00:33:39.400 --> 00:33:40.720 align:center
He was at least a baby,
00:33:40.800 --> 00:33:43.040 align:center
she wasn't even in your life yet.
00:33:44.000 --> 00:33:45.960 align:center
So if she knows, maybe he knows too--
00:33:46.040 --> 00:33:47.840 align:center
Because only a wife asks such questions.
00:33:47.920 --> 00:33:48.800 align:center
Yes.
00:33:48.880 --> 00:33:50.280 align:center
- I didn't ask.
- Let's see.
00:33:50.920 --> 00:33:53.680 align:center
Who was Shahid's teenage crush?
Do you have any idea?
00:33:53.760 --> 00:33:55.920 align:center
- Crush--
- Not an actress, just a real person.
00:33:56.640 --> 00:33:58.000 align:center
Who knows what he'll say!
00:33:59.920 --> 00:34:02.480 align:center
Beta, prevent and prepare
rather than repent and repair.
00:34:02.560 --> 00:34:05.160 align:center
The actress crush was
before his teens, right?
00:34:05.240 --> 00:34:06.240 align:center
Right?
00:34:06.320 --> 00:34:07.160 align:center
Raveena Tandon.
00:34:08.120 --> 00:34:10.640 align:center
- Raveena Tandon, paaji.
- He took a heroine's name.
00:34:11.560 --> 00:34:13.800 align:center
- I know this one.
- That's your crush.
00:34:13.880 --> 00:34:14.719 align:center
No.
00:34:15.280 --> 00:34:16.280 align:center
It is.
00:34:17.040 --> 00:34:18.239 align:center
No, teenage crush.
00:34:18.320 --> 00:34:20.400 align:center
It was… Anisha?
00:34:23.639 --> 00:34:24.760 align:center
Correct?
00:34:24.840 --> 00:34:25.840 align:center
- Correct?
- Bhaisahab,
00:34:26.440 --> 00:34:29.199 align:center
- now I can't just say it was Reshma.
- Obviously.
00:34:29.280 --> 00:34:30.280 align:center
I mean…
00:34:30.920 --> 00:34:32.760 align:center
Okay. Put your headphones on again.
00:34:32.840 --> 00:34:34.480 align:center
- I got it right. Yeah.
- Really?
00:34:34.560 --> 00:34:36.719 align:center
- No, I didn't know.
- She's destroying you right now.
00:34:36.800 --> 00:34:38.760 align:center
Okay, put your headphones back on.
00:34:38.840 --> 00:34:43.000 align:center
Bhai, what is one habit of yours
that you think annoys them both?
00:34:43.080 --> 00:34:44.520 align:center
One such habit
00:34:44.600 --> 00:34:46.239 align:center
- which you feel--
- I preach way too much.
00:34:46.840 --> 00:34:49.520 align:center
- You preach?
- Yes, like, "Life should be this way."
00:34:49.600 --> 00:34:50.960 align:center
- Right.
- Okay.
00:34:51.040 --> 00:34:52.400 align:center
Okay, guys. Mira.
00:34:53.840 --> 00:34:58.760 align:center
What is one habit of Shahid's
that annoys you?
00:34:59.679 --> 00:35:00.560 align:center
Just one?
00:35:03.520 --> 00:35:06.640 align:center
He goes to bed very early
and wakes up very early.
00:35:06.720 --> 00:35:08.760 align:center
- One of them--
- He sleeps early and wakes up early.
00:35:08.840 --> 00:35:11.920 align:center
I think you have to…
Please put it in a category,
00:35:12.000 --> 00:35:13.160 align:center
then I'll give you the answer.
00:35:13.240 --> 00:35:14.760 align:center
In which category should we place this?
00:35:14.840 --> 00:35:16.880 align:center
- Put it under personal interaction.
- Yes.
00:35:16.960 --> 00:35:18.400 align:center
He doesn't remember people's names.
00:35:18.480 --> 00:35:20.320 align:center
That cannot be said
because he remembers Reshma.
00:35:20.400 --> 00:35:21.800 align:center
Even I remember Reshma!
00:35:25.360 --> 00:35:27.760 align:center
He doesn't like to socialize.
00:35:27.840 --> 00:35:30.040 align:center
- He hates socializing.
- Mira, you already lost.
00:35:30.120 --> 00:35:32.440 align:center
- Stop listing my flaws now.
- I know!
00:35:34.040 --> 00:35:36.480 align:center
- Okay, Ishaan--
- He doesn't like eating out.
00:35:36.560 --> 00:35:37.560 align:center
Mira, stop.
00:35:40.440 --> 00:35:44.240 align:center
What is one habit of Shahid's
that annoys you,
00:35:44.320 --> 00:35:45.880 align:center
or Mira, or anyone at home?
00:35:45.960 --> 00:35:47.920 align:center
Annoys me, or annoys her?
00:35:48.000 --> 00:35:50.040 align:center
- Generally, everybody.
- See, category.
00:35:50.120 --> 00:35:51.880 align:center
- Yeah. Go ahead.
- We need a category.
00:35:51.960 --> 00:35:53.800 align:center
- Okay, she gets annoyed.
- Generally everybody.
00:35:53.880 --> 00:35:55.640 align:center
- You tell us.
- Is that you preach a lot.
00:35:55.720 --> 00:35:57.920 align:center
- No, it is his attitude--
- Is it that… that is it, right?
00:35:58.000 --> 00:36:00.320 align:center
- Yeah!
- I knew it!
00:36:02.880 --> 00:36:03.840 align:center
That's the one.
00:36:03.920 --> 00:36:05.840 align:center
Ishaan, she won again.
00:36:06.480 --> 00:36:09.520 align:center
It looks like the game's been rigged, and
your headphones aren't even plugged in,
00:36:09.600 --> 00:36:11.800 align:center
- so you're out, man.
- See, this is what always happens.
00:36:11.880 --> 00:36:14.280 align:center
- I can't win any game.
- Okay, put them back on.
00:36:14.360 --> 00:36:15.880 align:center
- Hey--
- Quickly, quickly.
00:36:16.640 --> 00:36:21.840 align:center
Name one vegetable
that you don't like at all.
00:36:22.680 --> 00:36:24.320 align:center
- Eggplant.
- Okay.
00:36:24.400 --> 00:36:26.520 align:center
- No, I'll take them off first this time.
- Yes.
00:36:26.600 --> 00:36:28.480 align:center
- Okay.
- Okay.
00:36:29.200 --> 00:36:30.600 align:center
- Don't take it off, Mira.
- Hold it.
00:36:30.680 --> 00:36:32.520 align:center
- Yes. Yes.
- Hold it.
00:36:33.200 --> 00:36:36.080 align:center
- Ask!
- Name one vegetable that Shahid hates.
00:36:36.160 --> 00:36:37.440 align:center
- A vegetable?
- Yes.
00:36:37.520 --> 00:36:38.920 align:center
You take your headphones off.
00:36:43.120 --> 00:36:44.760 align:center
One moment.
00:36:46.080 --> 00:36:47.920 align:center
I should at least attempt an answer.
00:36:49.520 --> 00:36:50.360 align:center
Eggplant?
00:36:50.440 --> 00:36:53.240 align:center
- Wow!
- Yes!
00:36:53.320 --> 00:36:55.640 align:center
Yes, yes, you're right.
00:36:55.720 --> 00:36:58.720 align:center
Name one vegetable
that Shahid doesn't like at all.
00:36:58.800 --> 00:37:00.440 align:center
Spinach, mustard greens.
00:37:02.080 --> 00:37:04.120 align:center
Mira has a variety of answers
for everything.
00:37:05.800 --> 00:37:09.080 align:center
Mushroom. Mushroom.
00:37:11.480 --> 00:37:12.320 align:center
There are too many.
00:37:13.040 --> 00:37:15.440 align:center
It starts with eggplant.
00:37:15.520 --> 00:37:18.480 align:center
Eggplant, mushroom,
spinach, mustard greens.
00:37:19.160 --> 00:37:20.320 align:center
It's not that Mira lost.
00:37:20.400 --> 00:37:22.320 align:center
Mira just knows more vegetables
he doesn't like.
00:37:22.400 --> 00:37:24.720 align:center
First runner-up. First runner-up.
00:37:26.000 --> 00:37:29.400 align:center
Do you mean any eggplant dish?
Like Punjabis really love mashed eggplant.
00:37:29.480 --> 00:37:32.080 align:center
- Actually, actually--
- She's the one who "mashes" him.
00:37:37.000 --> 00:37:39.160 align:center
You have to come to our house tonight.
00:37:39.960 --> 00:37:42.880 align:center
He's a very sore loser in games.
00:37:42.960 --> 00:37:43.800 align:center
- Very sore.
- Yeah.
00:37:43.880 --> 00:37:45.280 align:center
He'll vent now.
00:37:45.360 --> 00:37:47.040 align:center
He's a Scorpio, so he's very…
00:37:47.880 --> 00:37:52.480 align:center
An Ayurvedic doctor told me
that the word "baingan" comes
00:37:52.560 --> 00:37:53.840 align:center
from the word "be-gun,"
00:37:53.920 --> 00:37:54.760 align:center
"Be-gun."
00:37:54.840 --> 00:37:56.400 align:center
- It's said, inside it--
- Negative energy.
00:37:56.480 --> 00:37:58.000 align:center
- It has no nutrients at all.
- None.
00:37:58.080 --> 00:37:58.920 align:center
Is it?
00:37:59.000 --> 00:38:00.960 align:center
Ever since he told me,
I lost interest in eating it.
00:38:01.040 --> 00:38:03.320 align:center
- They said it has no nutritional value.
- Yeah.
00:38:03.400 --> 00:38:05.600 align:center
Mummy, why have you been
feeding me this since childhood?
00:38:08.720 --> 00:38:11.680 align:center
Her family makes one dish
that I still don't understand.
00:38:11.760 --> 00:38:13.360 align:center
- What?
- It's called tomato curry.
00:38:13.440 --> 00:38:15.000 align:center
Okay.
00:38:15.080 --> 00:38:17.320 align:center
To me, tomatoes serve
as a separate base in a dish.
00:38:17.400 --> 00:38:18.600 align:center
- You know?
- Yes.
00:38:18.680 --> 00:38:19.720 align:center
You make chutney with it.
00:38:19.800 --> 00:38:21.720 align:center
- You add onions and tomatoes…
- That's what it is.
00:38:21.800 --> 00:38:23.080 align:center
…to make okra or any other dish.
00:38:23.160 --> 00:38:24.440 align:center
Tomato curry?
00:38:25.040 --> 00:38:28.480 align:center
And the way they eat it,
00:38:28.560 --> 00:38:32.480 align:center
like it's a motichoor ladoo. You know?
00:38:34.880 --> 00:38:35.720 align:center
Excellent.
00:38:35.800 --> 00:38:38.520 align:center
- Come home next time--
- No, tell everyone about this tomato curry
00:38:38.600 --> 00:38:42.800 align:center
that you all spread on toast
and eat like this.
00:38:43.600 --> 00:38:46.400 align:center
Tomato curry is the pride
of the royal Rajput clan.
00:38:48.840 --> 00:38:51.360 align:center
For all us sons-in-law, when it comes out,
00:38:51.440 --> 00:38:53.280 align:center
there's a whole buildup first.
00:38:53.360 --> 00:38:55.400 align:center
"The tomato curry is coming."
00:38:55.480 --> 00:38:59.720 align:center
"Oh, God! Mumma, you really made it?
Oh, my God!" Like that.
00:39:00.280 --> 00:39:01.120 align:center
Finally…
00:39:01.640 --> 00:39:03.160 align:center
And it finally when it reaches the table,
00:39:03.240 --> 00:39:07.480 align:center
then you just stare
at that tomato curry like this.
00:39:07.560 --> 00:39:09.360 align:center
"Oh, my God! What am I eating today?"
00:39:11.440 --> 00:39:13.480 align:center
- Finally, every son-in-law…
- The grand buildup!
00:39:13.560 --> 00:39:15.800 align:center
…spreads tomato curry on his toast
like this.
00:39:17.120 --> 00:39:17.960 align:center
And then he eats it.
00:39:19.240 --> 00:39:20.560 align:center
Oh, lovely, lovely.
00:39:20.640 --> 00:39:25.000 align:center
"Wow! What an amazing tomato curry!"
00:39:28.400 --> 00:39:32.200 align:center
Paaji, it was great visiting
The Great Indian Cooking Show.
00:39:36.080 --> 00:39:37.920 align:center
We've only cooked one dish so far.
00:39:42.240 --> 00:39:43.920 align:center
Let's get back to the questions now. Okay.
00:39:46.200 --> 00:39:50.080 align:center
Shahid bhai,
sometimes we are all mere mortals.
00:39:50.160 --> 00:39:52.080 align:center
- But we--
- Sometimes we are mortals.
00:39:52.160 --> 00:39:54.960 align:center
Sometimes.
And sometimes a mortal gets angry.
00:39:55.040 --> 00:39:56.360 align:center
- Yes, true.
- When you get angry,
00:39:56.440 --> 00:39:57.840 align:center
what do you do in that moment?
00:39:59.080 --> 00:40:01.480 align:center
When I get angry, I actually
00:40:01.560 --> 00:40:05.800 align:center
say very critical things
very flatly, just as they are.
00:40:06.680 --> 00:40:09.200 align:center
Which is probably hard
for people to take in.
00:40:09.720 --> 00:40:12.080 align:center
Or else I go completely silent.
00:40:12.160 --> 00:40:13.640 align:center
- Okay.
- One of the two.
00:40:13.720 --> 00:40:15.520 align:center
You get the first chance.
00:40:15.600 --> 00:40:18.800 align:center
When Shahid gets angry,
what is the first thing he does?
00:40:18.880 --> 00:40:21.240 align:center
Go, beta, dive into your lifelong trauma.
00:40:25.440 --> 00:40:28.200 align:center
What's the first thing he does
when he's angry?
00:40:28.280 --> 00:40:31.520 align:center
When he's angry, first of all,
I think he goes silent.
00:40:31.600 --> 00:40:33.760 align:center
- Yes.
- Right.
00:40:38.160 --> 00:40:40.840 align:center
- You got it right.
- The real research will come from here.
00:40:41.560 --> 00:40:43.040 align:center
Mira, if Shahid gets angry,
00:40:43.120 --> 00:40:46.640 align:center
what does he instantly do
when he loses his temper?
00:40:49.480 --> 00:40:51.040 align:center
Either you get angry or you don't.
00:40:51.680 --> 00:40:53.560 align:center
I've seen him lose his temper
so many times.
00:40:53.640 --> 00:40:56.280 align:center
- Many different expressions of his anger.
- She's talking as if
00:40:56.360 --> 00:40:57.800 align:center
he has ten heads like Ravana!
00:40:58.440 --> 00:41:00.880 align:center
"I've seen so many of his forms."
00:41:04.520 --> 00:41:06.000 align:center
Mira is just wondering, "What…"
00:41:06.080 --> 00:41:08.360 align:center
Either he goes completely silent.
00:41:08.440 --> 00:41:10.280 align:center
- Yeah!
- The lady won! She won!
00:41:12.120 --> 00:41:13.200 align:center
- Or?
- Or?
00:41:13.280 --> 00:41:16.000 align:center
Or he goes out for a walk.
00:41:16.080 --> 00:41:16.920 align:center
- Yeah.
- He just…
00:41:17.000 --> 00:41:18.840 align:center
- He quietly takes a walk.
- You both are right.
00:41:18.920 --> 00:41:20.080 align:center
Both of you.
00:41:20.160 --> 00:41:22.640 align:center
- Okay, last question.
- I'll answer first.
00:41:22.720 --> 00:41:25.000 align:center
- Yes, okay.
- Right.
00:41:25.080 --> 00:41:26.760 align:center
- Too much pressure.
- Insecurity.
00:41:29.600 --> 00:41:31.160 align:center
- Shahid bhai.
- Yes.
00:41:31.240 --> 00:41:34.920 align:center
Between you and Ishaan,
who do you think is the best dancer?
00:41:35.000 --> 00:41:36.120 align:center
There are two answers to this.
00:41:36.880 --> 00:41:38.760 align:center
If I learn the steps, I'm better.
00:41:39.400 --> 00:41:42.040 align:center
But for freestyle,
nobody can even come close to him.
00:41:42.120 --> 00:41:44.160 align:center
- I see. Wow.
- He's a great freestyle dancer.
00:41:45.400 --> 00:41:46.240 align:center
Okay.
00:41:47.200 --> 00:41:49.920 align:center
We were going to ask you
for that answer anyway.
00:41:51.360 --> 00:41:55.880 align:center
Between Shahid and Ishaan,
who do you think is the best dancer?
00:42:00.560 --> 00:42:04.240 align:center
The right answer is Ishaan,
but my true answer is Shahid.
00:42:05.120 --> 00:42:07.040 align:center
- Wonderful.
- Even you said Sha--
00:42:07.120 --> 00:42:08.280 align:center
Yeah, so I won again.
00:42:08.960 --> 00:42:11.600 align:center
Who do you think is the better dancer,
you or Shahid?
00:42:11.680 --> 00:42:13.520 align:center
What kind of absurd question is this?
00:42:16.760 --> 00:42:18.520 align:center
He's the master, and I'm the disciple.
00:42:18.600 --> 00:42:21.000 align:center
How could I ever say I am superior to him?
00:42:21.080 --> 00:42:22.480 align:center
- He's the one.
- Incredible!
00:42:26.200 --> 00:42:28.040 align:center
But you missed the backhanded part.
00:42:28.120 --> 00:42:30.880 align:center
"He's the master, I'm the disciple.
How can I say I am superior?"
00:42:30.960 --> 00:42:32.120 align:center
- That's why…
- "So, he's better."
00:42:36.120 --> 00:42:37.480 align:center
- You know what Shahid said?
- Tell me.
00:42:37.560 --> 00:42:39.120 align:center
"If I am learning the steps
from somewhere,
00:42:39.200 --> 00:42:41.360 align:center
no one is better than me.
But if it comes to freestyle,
00:42:41.440 --> 00:42:42.760 align:center
- Ishaan's the best."
- That's true.
00:42:42.840 --> 00:42:44.160 align:center
- Yes.
- The move you made…
00:42:44.240 --> 00:42:45.240 align:center
Wow!
00:42:45.320 --> 00:42:47.640 align:center
"He's my master. How can I say
that I am better than him?"
00:42:49.080 --> 00:42:50.520 align:center
Let's find out today.
00:42:52.920 --> 00:42:54.520 align:center
Man, this will be a blast!
00:42:56.400 --> 00:42:58.240 align:center
Let's do it. What shall we do?
00:43:04.440 --> 00:43:06.400 align:center
We'll enjoy it from the front.
00:43:07.560 --> 00:43:08.560 align:center
Do a good job.
00:43:54.720 --> 00:43:56.160 align:center
Man!
00:43:56.240 --> 00:43:58.040 align:center
Both brothers are pure dynamite!
00:44:36.040 --> 00:44:37.240 align:center
Superb!
00:44:38.720 --> 00:44:40.400 align:center
Superb, bro!
00:44:41.080 --> 00:44:46.160 align:center
- Brilliant!
- Once more! Once more! Once more!
00:44:48.120 --> 00:44:48.960 align:center
Superb!
00:44:50.680 --> 00:44:55.040 align:center
Guys, watching you both dance live
00:44:55.120 --> 00:44:57.640 align:center
has been one of
my biggest treats to watch.
00:44:57.720 --> 00:44:58.720 align:center
Thank you.
00:44:58.800 --> 00:45:01.040 align:center
- Absolutely!
- Thank you so much.
00:45:01.120 --> 00:45:04.480 align:center
But I also know all the talent
in the family
00:45:04.560 --> 00:45:06.240 align:center
isn't just in Ishaan or Shahid alone.
00:45:06.320 --> 00:45:08.400 align:center
We have a very talented lady here.
00:45:08.480 --> 00:45:10.440 align:center
- Now we're talking!
- Isn't that how you'd say it?
00:45:10.520 --> 00:45:11.680 align:center
How wonderful!
00:45:11.760 --> 00:45:13.960 align:center
You play the piano beautifully.
00:45:14.040 --> 00:45:16.320 align:center
So, Mira, let's have you play the piano.
00:45:17.880 --> 00:45:20.080 align:center
Wow! What a surprise.
00:46:34.920 --> 00:46:36.080 align:center
Beautiful!
00:46:36.160 --> 00:46:38.280 align:center
Well done, well done!
00:46:39.320 --> 00:46:40.280 align:center
Well done!
00:46:41.200 --> 00:46:43.440 align:center
- Incredibly done!
- Wow!
00:46:45.560 --> 00:46:46.480 align:center
Too good.
00:46:46.560 --> 00:46:48.920 align:center
"Dil ka dariya" with such feeling, wow!
00:46:49.640 --> 00:46:52.320 align:center
I was so tempted to jump in
and be the third wheel.
00:46:52.400 --> 00:46:54.560 align:center
- So lovely.
- Only this time, he didn't.
00:46:54.640 --> 00:46:56.440 align:center
Not this time, for the first time!
00:46:57.320 --> 00:46:58.360 align:center
Good thinking!
00:47:01.760 --> 00:47:03.240 align:center
We won't do all the talking.
00:47:03.320 --> 00:47:05.920 align:center
If you'd like to talk to our guests,
00:47:06.000 --> 00:47:08.160 align:center
please raise your hand. You'll get a mic.
00:47:08.240 --> 00:47:10.440 align:center
- Hello.
- Namaste. How are you?
00:47:10.520 --> 00:47:13.200 align:center
- I'm doing well. My name is Rupal.
- Yes, Rupal.
00:47:13.280 --> 00:47:15.560 align:center
- Happy Diwali to everyone.
- Wish you the same.
00:47:15.640 --> 00:47:20.000 align:center
Mira ji, just as you have Shahid
in your life, I have Yash in mine.
00:47:20.080 --> 00:47:23.160 align:center
And we are getting married in December.
00:47:23.240 --> 00:47:25.400 align:center
- Oh, congratulations to you!
- Thank you.
00:47:25.480 --> 00:47:28.920 align:center
Since I'm getting married soon,
I wanted to ask you something.
00:47:29.000 --> 00:47:30.920 align:center
You've completed 11 years of marriage.
00:47:31.000 --> 00:47:33.520 align:center
- You'll complete 11 years of marriage too.
- Yes.
00:47:34.160 --> 00:47:35.720 align:center
So I wanted to ask you,
00:47:35.800 --> 00:47:39.160 align:center
what tips would you give
for a happy married life?
00:47:39.240 --> 00:47:40.600 align:center
First, don't do it.
00:47:42.760 --> 00:47:44.040 align:center
That is my tip.
00:47:48.200 --> 00:47:50.800 align:center
I think friendship is very important.
00:47:50.880 --> 00:47:53.360 align:center
Because you go through different phases.
00:47:53.440 --> 00:47:56.720 align:center
It's one way in the beginning.
Then you have kids, and they grow up.
00:47:57.560 --> 00:47:58.640 align:center
But I feel
00:47:58.720 --> 00:48:02.200 align:center
that the friendship between us
has always been there.
00:48:02.280 --> 00:48:06.240 align:center
Even when we fight, we can
still talk to each other like friends.
00:48:06.320 --> 00:48:09.400 align:center
So I think friendship is most important.
00:48:09.480 --> 00:48:10.800 align:center
"Love is friendship."
00:48:10.880 --> 00:48:12.560 align:center
Yes, Ms. Briganza!
00:48:15.680 --> 00:48:18.920 align:center
Provided the husband knows
the limit of that friendship.
00:48:19.000 --> 00:48:21.560 align:center
Your wife can be your friend,
but that doesn't mean you tell her,
00:48:21.640 --> 00:48:23.040 align:center
"Come meet my girlfriend."
00:48:23.120 --> 00:48:24.400 align:center
Don't…
00:48:26.400 --> 00:48:29.560 align:center
No, I should mention
that we've been together since school.
00:48:29.640 --> 00:48:32.560 align:center
Oh, so you know each other so well.
00:48:32.640 --> 00:48:33.880 align:center
That's perfect.
00:48:33.960 --> 00:48:36.920 align:center
- You must even know his hemoglobin count.
- Yes!
00:48:37.640 --> 00:48:38.800 align:center
Since what grade?
00:48:38.880 --> 00:48:41.400 align:center
- Since fifth grade.
- Since fifth grade?
00:48:41.480 --> 00:48:44.080 align:center
You attained enlightenment back then
that he's the one?
00:48:44.160 --> 00:48:45.920 align:center
No, he was my crush since school…
00:48:46.000 --> 00:48:47.080 align:center
- I see.
- …but we were quite--
00:48:47.160 --> 00:48:49.000 align:center
- And finally you decided to crush him!
- Yes.
00:48:50.760 --> 00:48:52.560 align:center
- Well, congratulations to you both…
- Thank you.
00:48:52.640 --> 00:48:53.640 align:center
…on your wedding.
00:48:54.200 --> 00:48:57.960 align:center
Stay happy and prosperous,
whether you're in Delhi or Ghaziabad. Yes?
00:48:58.760 --> 00:48:59.680 align:center
Yes, ma'am.
00:48:59.760 --> 00:49:01.000 align:center
- Hello.
- Hello.
00:49:01.080 --> 00:49:02.800 align:center
Good evening, everyone.
00:49:02.880 --> 00:49:06.440 align:center
- And happy Diwali to all of you.
- Happy Diwali, ma'am.
00:49:06.520 --> 00:49:08.280 align:center
Today's question of mine is for Mira ji.
00:49:08.360 --> 00:49:09.800 align:center
Today's? What did you ask yesterday?
00:49:10.800 --> 00:49:12.080 align:center
Yes.
00:49:12.160 --> 00:49:15.960 align:center
Ma'am, considering the movies
Shahid sir has done…
00:49:16.040 --> 00:49:18.520 align:center
Like, there was the movie Vivah,
00:49:18.600 --> 00:49:21.160 align:center
which had a very modest
portrayal of romance.
00:49:21.240 --> 00:49:23.920 align:center
Then came Kabir Singh,
00:49:24.000 --> 00:49:27.280 align:center
with its intense portrayal of romance.
00:49:27.360 --> 00:49:29.960 align:center
After that came Cocktail 2,
00:49:30.040 --> 00:49:32.720 align:center
in which he romanced two actresses.
00:49:32.800 --> 00:49:34.240 align:center
- Modest romance.
- So…
00:49:34.320 --> 00:49:35.640 align:center
Are you writing a thesis?
00:49:37.960 --> 00:49:40.560 align:center
So I wanted to ask,
don't you ever get jealous?
00:49:40.640 --> 00:49:42.400 align:center
Because this is my experience.
00:49:42.480 --> 00:49:47.400 align:center
Even if my husband gets a call
from a female colleague,
00:49:47.480 --> 00:49:50.160 align:center
I put my ear to the phone to hear
what they're talking about.
00:49:50.240 --> 00:49:53.160 align:center
And sometimes, when we're out
00:49:53.240 --> 00:49:55.400 align:center
and a beautiful woman walks past,
00:49:55.480 --> 00:49:58.600 align:center
I look at my husband first
to see if he's checking her out. So…
00:49:58.680 --> 00:49:59.600 align:center
Let the man live!
00:50:02.120 --> 00:50:04.680 align:center
He does so much romance on screen.
00:50:04.760 --> 00:50:06.760 align:center
Don't you ever get jealous of that?
00:50:06.840 --> 00:50:10.000 align:center
Well, I'll give you
my point of view on this.
00:50:10.080 --> 00:50:13.120 align:center
I feel that if either of you
00:50:13.640 --> 00:50:16.920 align:center
feels jealous or insecure,
00:50:17.000 --> 00:50:19.600 align:center
perhaps you haven't been
00:50:19.680 --> 00:50:21.720 align:center
entirely open with each other.
00:50:21.800 --> 00:50:25.080 align:center
If you believe in yourself
and know that you're enough,
00:50:25.160 --> 00:50:29.880 align:center
you'll know
he'll love you just as you are.
00:50:29.960 --> 00:50:34.320 align:center
I have to say,
he has never let me feel jealous.
00:50:34.400 --> 00:50:37.400 align:center
He has always been so,
00:50:37.480 --> 00:50:39.120 align:center
- you know, like…
- Thank you so much.
00:50:39.200 --> 00:50:40.600 align:center
Yeah, he's been very good with that.
00:50:40.680 --> 00:50:44.280 align:center
She's like, "Oh, so that's how it is!
I broke his legs unnecessarily!"
00:50:46.560 --> 00:50:47.720 align:center
Listen, madam!
00:50:48.760 --> 00:50:51.080 align:center
A relationship without trust
is no relationship at all.
00:50:54.680 --> 00:50:55.680 align:center
Thank you so much.
00:50:56.920 --> 00:50:58.680 align:center
Now I'll finally come sit there.
00:50:58.760 --> 00:51:00.520 align:center
- I'll take my spot.
- There he goes.
00:51:00.600 --> 00:51:02.920 align:center
- Yeah.
- This is what always happens.
00:51:04.240 --> 00:51:07.400 align:center
"My Karan-Arjun will return!"
00:51:09.600 --> 00:51:13.280 align:center
"They'll tear the earth apart to return!"
00:51:13.360 --> 00:51:16.320 align:center
"They'll shatter the heavens to return."
00:51:24.120 --> 00:51:24.960 align:center
Oh, hello!
00:51:30.320 --> 00:51:33.440 align:center
Sidhu ji, don't you worry!
00:51:33.520 --> 00:51:36.440 align:center
- My Karan-Arjun will come!
- Will come!
00:51:36.520 --> 00:51:37.880 align:center
Wait and see--
00:51:40.000 --> 00:51:42.960 align:center
- They are here!
- They are here!
00:51:43.040 --> 00:51:47.040 align:center
My Karan-Arjun have come!
My Karan-Arjun are here!
00:51:47.120 --> 00:51:48.560 align:center
- My Karan-Arjun are here!
- Ma!
00:51:48.640 --> 00:51:50.400 align:center
Ma'am, they're Shahid and Ishaan.
00:51:50.480 --> 00:51:53.280 align:center
Oh, sorry. My bad, son. My bad.
00:51:53.360 --> 00:51:56.600 align:center
Son, seeing such lovely brothers
makes me feel
00:51:56.680 --> 00:51:58.640 align:center
like my Karan-Arjun have returned.
00:51:58.720 --> 00:51:59.760 align:center
- Ma'am.
- Yes, son?
00:51:59.840 --> 00:52:01.200 align:center
- May I go?
- Yeah, go.
00:52:02.160 --> 00:52:04.080 align:center
- Happy Diwali, ma'am.
- Happy Diwali, son.
00:52:04.600 --> 00:52:06.520 align:center
Ma'am! Happy Diwali.
00:52:07.120 --> 00:52:08.280 align:center
Happy Diwali, dear.
00:52:09.120 --> 00:52:11.320 align:center
I'm wishing you a happy Diwali, ma'am!
00:52:11.400 --> 00:52:14.080 align:center
And I wish you a very
happy Diwali too, son!
00:52:15.080 --> 00:52:16.440 align:center
Ma'am, you don't get it.
00:52:16.520 --> 00:52:18.520 align:center
If one's wishing you
a happy Diwali two or three times,
00:52:18.600 --> 00:52:20.080 align:center
they are expecting festive gratuities.
00:52:21.080 --> 00:52:22.560 align:center
- Yeah.
- I didn't get that!
00:52:22.640 --> 00:52:23.640 align:center
I get it now.
00:52:23.720 --> 00:52:26.480 align:center
It's polite to give some
festive gratuities.
00:52:26.560 --> 00:52:28.200 align:center
Hey, keep this.
00:52:28.280 --> 00:52:29.840 align:center
Wishing you a very happy…
00:52:38.280 --> 00:52:40.880 align:center
Happy Diwali, Shahid Boss.
00:52:42.840 --> 00:52:45.280 align:center
- Happy Diwali, Master Ishaan.
- Happy Diwali.
00:52:45.360 --> 00:52:47.680 align:center
- Happy Diwali, Mira madam.
- Happy Diwali.
00:52:48.440 --> 00:52:50.920 align:center
Son, enlighten them with
the same wisdom you shared with me.
00:52:55.400 --> 00:52:59.360 align:center
Brother, I forgot to tell you that people
come here begging with ridiculous excuses.
00:52:59.440 --> 00:53:00.320 align:center
Be aware.
00:53:00.880 --> 00:53:02.640 align:center
Son, I don't do it for fun.
00:53:04.240 --> 00:53:06.200 align:center
Careful, your lower lip might fall off.
00:53:11.600 --> 00:53:13.040 align:center
I am helpless, son.
00:53:14.840 --> 00:53:18.480 align:center
You know my bangles are still pawned
with the moneylender.
00:53:18.560 --> 00:53:19.880 align:center
- "Pebbles"?
- "Pebbles"?
00:53:19.960 --> 00:53:21.240 align:center
Bangles!
00:53:21.320 --> 00:53:22.880 align:center
Bangles!
00:53:22.960 --> 00:53:25.440 align:center
- We thought she pawned pebbles!
- Pebbles.
00:53:25.520 --> 00:53:27.920 align:center
Why would I pawn pebbles
with the moneylender, dear?
00:53:30.120 --> 00:53:31.600 align:center
And I need to get them back.
00:53:31.680 --> 00:53:34.600 align:center
So I always need some money.
00:53:34.680 --> 00:53:35.840 align:center
She's acting all innocent here.
00:53:35.920 --> 00:53:38.400 align:center
At night, she stands on the highway
with a candle and robs drivers.
00:53:39.600 --> 00:53:40.960 align:center
Son, I quit that job.
00:53:45.200 --> 00:53:47.000 align:center
It feels so good to see you both.
00:53:47.080 --> 00:53:50.760 align:center
Look at these two brothers!
So sweet and well-mannered.
00:53:50.840 --> 00:53:52.480 align:center
I have two sons.
00:53:52.560 --> 00:53:54.360 align:center
For ten days, I've been telling them
00:53:54.440 --> 00:53:58.000 align:center
to clean the house for Diwali,
but they refuse.
00:53:58.080 --> 00:53:59.440 align:center
They just don't listen to me!
00:53:59.520 --> 00:54:01.640 align:center
Both of them are really stubborn.
00:54:07.640 --> 00:54:08.760 align:center
It seems they're here.
00:54:27.640 --> 00:54:28.600 align:center
Krushna!
00:54:43.840 --> 00:54:46.800 align:center
Namaskar. Adab. Sat Sri Akal. Kem cho?
00:54:50.800 --> 00:54:52.960 align:center
- Which festival?
- Diwali. Diwali.
00:54:53.040 --> 00:54:54.840 align:center
"Which festival?"
00:54:57.880 --> 00:54:59.040 align:center
- Happy Diwali.
- Happy Diwali.
00:54:59.120 --> 00:55:02.400 align:center
Wait a minute, bhaiya! Listen!
00:55:03.640 --> 00:55:05.480 align:center
That was a rather short wish.
00:55:06.200 --> 00:55:07.280 align:center
Make it a bit bigger.
00:55:07.840 --> 00:55:10.520 align:center
Stretch the wish a bit longer.
Make it bigger.
00:55:10.600 --> 00:55:11.640 align:center
Why?
00:55:12.720 --> 00:55:15.080 align:center
We stream in 192 countries, man!
00:55:15.600 --> 00:55:16.720 align:center
- Yeah, okay.
- Come on.
00:55:19.480 --> 00:55:21.160 align:center
Happy Diwali to all.
00:55:24.720 --> 00:55:27.320 align:center
Oh, man.
00:55:28.320 --> 00:55:30.520 align:center
We're wishing them a happy Diwali, bhaiya.
00:55:31.440 --> 00:55:33.280 align:center
This isn't your usual weekend TV show.
00:55:34.400 --> 00:55:36.160 align:center
That one will be back next week.
00:55:37.400 --> 00:55:39.400 align:center
Please put some energy into it!
00:55:40.320 --> 00:55:41.320 align:center
Look, watch this.
00:55:41.400 --> 00:55:42.400 align:center
Shahid!
00:55:43.760 --> 00:55:46.440 align:center
I wish you a very happy Diwali!
00:55:46.520 --> 00:55:47.600 align:center
This…
00:55:48.560 --> 00:55:49.680 align:center
Like this.
00:55:52.120 --> 00:55:54.320 align:center
- Wow!
- Show some energy!
00:55:54.400 --> 00:55:56.400 align:center
- Just say it normally.
- What?
00:55:57.120 --> 00:55:58.760 align:center
Why go so over the top?
00:55:59.680 --> 00:56:01.080 align:center
- Over?
- Yeah.
00:56:01.160 --> 00:56:03.840 align:center
I don't even play cricket,
so why would I bowl an over?
00:56:03.920 --> 00:56:06.400 align:center
I make people play hockey, bhaiya. Hockey!
00:56:07.720 --> 00:56:09.040 align:center
Look at the goal.
00:56:14.800 --> 00:56:15.960 align:center
Seventy minutes…
00:56:16.600 --> 00:56:19.120 align:center
- "Look at the goal!"
- We only have 70 minutes.
00:56:19.200 --> 00:56:20.480 align:center
Look at the goal.
00:56:23.160 --> 00:56:26.200 align:center
Kids! Oh, my Karan-Arjun!
00:56:26.840 --> 00:56:28.680 align:center
Hey, son! Wait!
00:56:28.760 --> 00:56:30.680 align:center
Hey!
00:56:30.760 --> 00:56:32.880 align:center
Why are you walking off? Listen to me!
00:56:32.960 --> 00:56:35.840 align:center
I asked you both to clean the house.
00:56:35.920 --> 00:56:37.920 align:center
- Did you clean, son?
- Mom…
00:56:39.320 --> 00:56:41.400 align:center
Why did I sound like Bachchan sahab?
00:56:51.920 --> 00:56:52.800 align:center
Mom!
00:56:54.440 --> 00:56:56.280 align:center
Dirty closets in the house,
00:56:57.440 --> 00:56:58.920 align:center
Mom's filthy saris…
00:56:59.000 --> 00:57:00.400 align:center
Oh, wonderful!
00:57:00.480 --> 00:57:02.000 align:center
…I will not wash them.
00:57:03.440 --> 00:57:05.040 align:center
Jab Tak Hai Maa!
00:57:05.920 --> 00:57:07.920 align:center
- Jab Tak Hai Maa!
- What is this?
00:57:08.000 --> 00:57:09.200 align:center
Jab Tak Hai Maa!
00:57:11.600 --> 00:57:15.280 align:center
With all these antics of yours,
your mom won't last much longer!
00:57:16.840 --> 00:57:18.400 align:center
He's completely useless.
00:57:18.480 --> 00:57:20.040 align:center
Oh, my sweet son.
00:57:21.440 --> 00:57:23.240 align:center
Don't touch me. Don't touch me.
00:57:23.320 --> 00:57:26.680 align:center
I told you to sweep. Did you
hit the floor with the broom or not?
00:57:26.760 --> 00:57:28.920 align:center
It's Saturday. I hit shoulders and biceps.
00:57:33.560 --> 00:57:38.240 align:center
Son, working out your shoulders
and biceps won't clean the house.
00:57:38.320 --> 00:57:40.520 align:center
Only sweeping will.
00:57:40.600 --> 00:57:41.440 align:center
He's just--
00:57:41.520 --> 00:57:45.640 align:center
Hey, son, I asked you to clean
that cooler. Did you do it?
00:57:45.720 --> 00:57:47.880 align:center
Why should I clean something
I don't even use?
00:57:49.080 --> 00:57:50.760 align:center
- How do you not use it, son?
- No, no, no.
00:57:50.840 --> 00:57:52.880 align:center
All three of us share the same room.
00:57:53.720 --> 00:57:56.040 align:center
But you sleep right in front
of the cooler.
00:57:58.080 --> 00:58:00.360 align:center
I sleep at the back.
You block all the air.
00:58:00.440 --> 00:58:02.320 align:center
Yes, absolutely right, bhaiya!
00:58:03.280 --> 00:58:06.320 align:center
All night long, you block
the cold air from the cooler.
00:58:06.960 --> 00:58:10.520 align:center
And all night long,
we get to deal with Mom breaking wind.
00:58:17.000 --> 00:58:18.360 align:center
I…
00:58:18.440 --> 00:58:20.280 align:center
- Do you all see this?
- Very bad.
00:58:20.360 --> 00:58:23.040 align:center
- Absolutely.
- What kind of sons has God given me!
00:58:24.080 --> 00:58:26.280 align:center
Honestly, I wish God
00:58:26.360 --> 00:58:29.240 align:center
had given me ginger
instead of these two sons!
00:58:29.320 --> 00:58:30.880 align:center
- Ginger!
- At least I could crush it
00:58:30.960 --> 00:58:32.640 align:center
and put it in my tea!
00:58:42.160 --> 00:58:43.600 align:center
No matter what she says,
00:58:44.280 --> 00:58:45.520 align:center
we are still happy
00:58:46.360 --> 00:58:48.440 align:center
- that we got a mom.
- Oh, son.
00:58:49.160 --> 00:58:51.720 align:center
Because what would we even do
with so much ginger?
00:58:57.040 --> 00:58:58.560 align:center
I'm telling you the truth, Kapil.
00:58:59.440 --> 00:59:03.280 align:center
With that much ginger in the tea,
00:59:04.360 --> 00:59:07.240 align:center
forget the milk curdling.
The whole buffalo would explode!
00:59:15.280 --> 00:59:16.840 align:center
I don't like her. I don't like her.
00:59:16.920 --> 00:59:18.160 align:center
- Me too.
- I hate her. I hate her.
00:59:18.240 --> 00:59:19.480 align:center
Hold on a minute.
00:59:19.560 --> 00:59:22.000 align:center
You two don't get the importance
of cleaning the house.
00:59:22.080 --> 00:59:26.680 align:center
Keeping the house clean is important.
If it's dirty, what will people say, son?
00:59:26.760 --> 00:59:29.000 align:center
No. I hate her from the core of my heart.
00:59:29.600 --> 00:59:31.280 align:center
No, I don't like her.
00:59:31.360 --> 00:59:34.480 align:center
- I don't like her.
- I don't like you either, son!
00:59:35.760 --> 00:59:37.720 align:center
Why are you always
giving attitude for no reason?
00:59:47.280 --> 00:59:51.120 align:center
Son, did someone stick potatoes
under your armpits?
00:59:51.920 --> 00:59:53.160 align:center
Like this…
00:59:55.480 --> 00:59:58.720 align:center
Son, bending down a little won't kill you.
00:59:58.800 --> 01:00:00.480 align:center
Sweep and mop the floor!
01:00:00.560 --> 01:00:01.520 align:center
And you…
01:00:02.440 --> 01:00:04.840 align:center
- Stay there.
- What is this?
01:00:04.920 --> 01:00:05.920 align:center
Why do you keep doing that?
01:00:06.600 --> 01:00:09.160 align:center
If you want to keep doing that,
then grab a broom.
01:00:09.240 --> 01:00:12.080 align:center
At least the house will get cleaned
in the process. Like this!
01:00:17.640 --> 01:00:18.520 align:center
See that?
01:00:20.200 --> 01:00:22.120 align:center
She shook the whole stage!
01:00:23.880 --> 01:00:26.360 align:center
Bhaiya, don't relax.
01:00:27.120 --> 01:00:30.880 align:center
- Listen, the poor thing is furious.
- Yeah.
01:00:30.960 --> 01:00:32.720 align:center
Let's just clean the house.
01:00:35.160 --> 01:00:37.480 align:center
Enough with the "hmm"!
Come on, let's clean.
01:00:38.120 --> 01:00:41.320 align:center
If I don't go "hmm," how will people
know I'm playing Shah Rukh?
01:00:44.680 --> 01:00:46.400 align:center
- Alright, come on.
- That's true.
01:00:46.960 --> 01:00:48.760 align:center
- Let's clean the house.
- Okay.
01:00:48.840 --> 01:00:49.800 align:center
Is that okay?
01:00:49.880 --> 01:00:51.360 align:center
- Okay.
- Okay. That's a deal.
01:00:51.440 --> 01:00:54.280 align:center
- What's the deal? What is it?
- It's a deal. Mom, I'll tell you.
01:00:54.360 --> 01:00:57.280 align:center
Bhaiya, you clean this table.
01:00:57.360 --> 01:00:58.280 align:center
- Okay.
- Yeah.
01:00:58.360 --> 01:01:00.160 align:center
- I'll clean this sofa.
- Okay?
01:01:00.240 --> 01:01:03.960 align:center
- And, Mom, you clean the floor.
- Okay.
01:01:04.040 --> 01:01:06.280 align:center
- Yes, yes, yes.
- Done deal? Done deal.
01:01:06.360 --> 01:01:08.360 align:center
- I'll clean the floor.
- Done deal?
01:01:08.440 --> 01:01:10.440 align:center
- Okay.
- The floor's clean. Not much to do.
01:01:10.520 --> 01:01:11.360 align:center
Good for me.
01:01:11.440 --> 01:01:13.360 align:center
This is the table
I'm supposed to clean, right?
01:01:13.440 --> 01:01:14.520 align:center
Yeah.
01:01:16.360 --> 01:01:17.440 align:center
Okay.
01:01:17.520 --> 01:01:18.960 align:center
Clean it properly, son.
01:01:19.040 --> 01:01:20.120 align:center
Good.
01:01:27.880 --> 01:01:30.360 align:center
My job is done.
Look at this, it's so clean.
01:01:30.440 --> 01:01:32.040 align:center
- No.
- It's so clean, it's lovely.
01:01:32.120 --> 01:01:34.000 align:center
- Don't worry, Mom. I'll…
- Is this how you clean?
01:01:34.080 --> 01:01:35.400 align:center
I'm right here. Don't worry.
01:01:43.760 --> 01:01:44.800 align:center
What did you do?
01:01:44.880 --> 01:01:47.480 align:center
I cleaned the sofa too.
Now you handle the floor.
01:02:02.320 --> 01:02:03.440 align:center
Wow!
01:02:03.520 --> 01:02:05.720 align:center
Bravo, son! What a brilliant method!
01:02:06.440 --> 01:02:09.400 align:center
If you don't want to clean the house,
then don't!
01:02:09.480 --> 01:02:11.640 align:center
I'm not dying for your help!
01:02:11.720 --> 01:02:13.040 align:center
Won't clean the house.
01:02:13.120 --> 01:02:15.760 align:center
I bought Diwali gifts for you two,
01:02:15.840 --> 01:02:17.600 align:center
but you won't get them now!
01:02:17.680 --> 01:02:19.960 align:center
It's not as though you've bought us a PS5!
01:02:20.600 --> 01:02:23.440 align:center
You probably got that clapping monkey.
I hate that.
01:02:23.520 --> 01:02:25.960 align:center
- I know her. I know her.
- Mom…
01:02:26.480 --> 01:02:28.360 align:center
Please give me my gift, Mom.
01:02:28.440 --> 01:02:30.960 align:center
- You want your gift?
- I want my gift, Mom, please.
01:02:31.040 --> 01:02:33.400 align:center
- I got you a gift, son.
- Please.
01:02:33.480 --> 01:02:36.080 align:center
I bought kutra pajamas for you.
01:02:36.160 --> 01:02:37.680 align:center
"Kutra pajamas."
01:02:37.760 --> 01:02:39.400 align:center
- "Kutra."
- Kutra pajamas.
01:02:40.600 --> 01:02:41.760 align:center
She's doing comedy.
01:02:45.200 --> 01:02:46.160 align:center
"Kutra"?
01:02:46.240 --> 01:02:49.160 align:center
It's not "kutra" pajamas.
It's kurta-pajamas.
01:02:50.040 --> 01:02:51.720 align:center
- No, son.
- What?
01:02:51.800 --> 01:02:53.320 align:center
I really mean kutra pajamas.
01:02:53.400 --> 01:02:54.720 align:center
- Kutra?
- Look at this.
01:02:54.800 --> 01:02:56.920 align:center
Kutra pajamas!
01:03:00.840 --> 01:03:03.800 align:center
These are kutra pajamas.
01:03:03.880 --> 01:03:06.560 align:center
Since you wear clothes
that look chewed up!
01:03:07.520 --> 01:03:09.560 align:center
- It'll suit you, son.
- Sure, Mom.
01:03:10.080 --> 01:03:12.400 align:center
Pathaan will wear this chewed-up rag
to the next party.
01:03:13.200 --> 01:03:14.480 align:center
I like it.
01:03:14.560 --> 01:03:17.760 align:center
Yeah! I like it, Mom.
01:03:17.840 --> 01:03:19.400 align:center
And what did you bring for me?
01:03:20.080 --> 01:03:22.880 align:center
Oh, so now you want your gift too?
01:03:23.720 --> 01:03:26.680 align:center
Son, there's no point buying shirts
or clothes for you.
01:03:26.760 --> 01:03:27.920 align:center
I'm telling you the truth.
01:03:28.000 --> 01:03:30.760 align:center
I bought him so many shirts.
01:03:30.840 --> 01:03:34.600 align:center
Wherever he goes,
he takes off his shirt and throws it away.
01:03:38.760 --> 01:03:41.160 align:center
A total waste of money.
01:03:42.200 --> 01:03:43.480 align:center
Okay.
01:03:43.560 --> 01:03:44.840 align:center
- Okay.
- You didn't get me anything.
01:03:44.920 --> 01:03:45.880 align:center
Leave it on, son.
01:03:46.400 --> 01:03:47.760 align:center
No, don't! Son!
01:03:48.600 --> 01:03:49.760 align:center
Leave it on.
01:03:50.520 --> 01:03:51.400 align:center
Son…
01:03:51.480 --> 01:03:53.280 align:center
- What…
- Son…
01:03:54.280 --> 01:03:55.920 align:center
What are you doing, bhaiya?
01:03:56.560 --> 01:03:58.040 align:center
Bhaiya! What…
01:03:58.800 --> 01:04:01.080 align:center
Bhaiya, no! Wait a minute!
01:04:01.160 --> 01:04:02.000 align:center
No.
01:04:03.480 --> 01:04:05.240 align:center
No. No.
01:04:06.800 --> 01:04:09.400 align:center
- No!
- Hey, don't pull my pants down!
01:04:11.400 --> 01:04:12.760 align:center
- Bhaiya, no.
- Okay.
01:04:12.840 --> 01:04:15.200 align:center
- It's not that kind of show! Please.
- Okay, okay.
01:04:16.000 --> 01:04:18.520 align:center
- Okay, okay, okay.
- Calm down. Calm down.
01:04:18.600 --> 01:04:19.440 align:center
Calm down.
01:04:19.520 --> 01:04:21.760 align:center
What do you mean by "kaam" down?
You're doing great!
01:04:24.400 --> 01:04:25.360 align:center
So bad.
01:04:26.000 --> 01:04:28.880 align:center
First, turn up your volume, son.
01:04:38.000 --> 01:04:41.480 align:center
If I can't hear you right here,
how will anyone else?
01:04:44.880 --> 01:04:48.720 align:center
I've been pleading with you both
to clean the house for Diwali.
01:04:48.800 --> 01:04:50.000 align:center
You two never listen!
01:04:50.080 --> 01:04:53.840 align:center
And if you're not going to clean,
at least put up these lights I got.
01:04:53.920 --> 01:04:55.240 align:center
At least get this done.
01:04:55.320 --> 01:04:57.440 align:center
- Oh, yeah, yeah.
- Okay, okay.
01:04:57.520 --> 01:04:59.320 align:center
- Put up the lights.
- Yeah.
01:04:59.400 --> 01:05:01.000 align:center
- We'll put them up, bro.
- These?
01:05:01.080 --> 01:05:02.080 align:center
You can stand here.
01:05:02.160 --> 01:05:03.520 align:center
Okay, stand here.
01:05:03.600 --> 01:05:04.840 align:center
Putting up the lights?
01:05:04.920 --> 01:05:08.440 align:center
- Yes, we will, Mom. Here, hold this.
- I'll hold it, but where do they go?
01:05:08.520 --> 01:05:09.800 align:center
This work…
01:05:09.880 --> 01:05:12.480 align:center
- Bhaiya, do one thing.
- Put them over there.
01:05:12.560 --> 01:05:13.560 align:center
- Where?
- That way.
01:05:13.640 --> 01:05:17.040 align:center
- No, start with him first.
- Start with him?
01:05:17.120 --> 01:05:20.000 align:center
- He's younger. Go that way.
- No, no. Go towards bhaiya.
01:05:20.080 --> 01:05:20.920 align:center
Wait, with him--
01:05:21.000 --> 01:05:22.240 align:center
- Start with him.
- Start with him.
01:05:22.320 --> 01:05:23.440 align:center
- Hold on--
- Him first!
01:05:23.520 --> 01:05:25.040 align:center
- Decide who goes first!
- Bhaiya first.
01:05:25.120 --> 01:05:26.640 align:center
- Stay right there.
- All done.
01:05:26.720 --> 01:05:27.920 align:center
- Just stand here.
- Wait, bhaiya.
01:05:28.000 --> 01:05:29.880 align:center
Bhaiya, look at this.
01:05:36.520 --> 01:05:37.400 align:center
Wow.
01:05:40.560 --> 01:05:41.600 align:center
Son…
01:05:41.680 --> 01:05:44.120 align:center
don't decorate me! Decorate the house!
01:05:45.000 --> 01:05:46.120 align:center
You look great, Mom!
01:05:47.520 --> 01:05:49.320 align:center
Son, what are you doing?
01:05:49.400 --> 01:05:50.600 align:center
Here, wear this.
01:05:50.680 --> 01:05:53.240 align:center
Kapil, I saw an octopus
just like this in the Maldives.
01:05:58.000 --> 01:05:59.120 align:center
Hey, what are you…
01:06:00.760 --> 01:06:01.840 align:center
All good?
01:06:10.320 --> 01:06:12.040 align:center
HAPPY DEEPAVALI
01:06:12.120 --> 01:06:13.960 align:center
"Happy Deepavali!"
01:06:36.120 --> 01:06:37.760 align:center
Come on, Mommy!
01:06:45.000 --> 01:06:47.040 align:center
- Oh, Mom!
- Happy Diwali.
01:06:47.640 --> 01:06:48.800 align:center
Happy Diwali.
01:06:48.880 --> 01:06:51.040 align:center
Happy Diwali! Happy Diwali!
01:06:51.120 --> 01:06:52.880 align:center
- Happy Diwali.
- Superb!
01:06:53.440 --> 01:06:55.280 align:center
- Happy Diwali!
- Superb!
01:06:55.360 --> 01:06:58.080 align:center
A big round of applause for our guests!
01:07:01.560 --> 01:07:03.680 align:center
Shahid bhai, Mira, Ishaan,
thank you so much for coming.
01:07:03.760 --> 01:07:05.040 align:center
Thank you so much.
01:07:06.440 --> 01:07:09.560 align:center
Friends, we had so much fun
celebrating Diwali with our guests.
01:07:09.640 --> 01:07:13.640 align:center
Light the lamps of joy with your loved
ones this Diwali, and keep watching
01:07:13.720 --> 01:07:16.640 align:center
The Great Indian Kapil Show
Season 5 on Netflix.
01:07:16.720 --> 01:07:18.600 align:center
A festival of laughs.
See you next Saturday.
01:07:18.680 --> 01:07:21.240 align:center
Until then, take care and good night.
01:07:21.320 --> 01:07:22.320 align:center
Thank you so much.
01:07:38.640 --> 01:07:42.480 align:center
Please welcome Mr. Pankaj Tripathi,
Mr. Zakir Khan
01:07:42.560 --> 01:07:44.680 align:center
and Dr. Vikas Divyakirti sahab.
01:07:45.960 --> 01:07:48.480 align:center
You're the first teacher in my life
I've ever been a fan of.
01:07:48.560 --> 01:07:50.560 align:center
Otherwise, we were always
just scared of teachers.
01:07:51.200 --> 01:07:54.520 align:center
- Partly because of our own antics.
- And partly because of the teachers'.
01:07:55.680 --> 01:07:58.120 align:center
Zakir bhai, how did you end up
among educated people?
01:07:59.360 --> 01:08:02.800 align:center
Well, they say you should surround
yourself with people smarter than you.
01:08:02.880 --> 01:08:05.080 align:center
That works for him.
What were you thinking?
01:08:05.160 --> 01:08:07.440 align:center
He decided to surround himself
with fools instead.
01:08:09.080 --> 01:08:10.480 align:center
So when did you realize
01:08:10.560 --> 01:08:12.680 align:center
that for any country's growth,
rather than politics,
01:08:12.760 --> 01:08:15.520 align:center
education needs more focus?
01:08:15.600 --> 01:08:18.280 align:center
I never thought about it
as deeply as you're making it sound.
01:08:19.160 --> 01:08:21.520 align:center
Pankaj bhai, were you ever confused
before getting into acting?
01:08:21.600 --> 01:08:23.399 align:center
I wanted to be a student leader too.
01:08:23.479 --> 01:08:26.399 align:center
But the police beat me so badly
that I changed my mind that very day.
01:08:28.040 --> 01:08:30.800 align:center
- My name is Avishkar Singh.
- Your name is "Avishkar"?
01:08:30.880 --> 01:08:32.160 align:center
Were you born or…
01:08:34.319 --> 01:08:36.880 align:center
When a father becomes more
of a friend, is that good or bad?
01:08:36.960 --> 01:08:38.279 align:center
It's definitely a bad thing.
01:08:38.359 --> 01:08:40.479 align:center
If he asks,
"Why are you going out so late?"
01:08:40.560 --> 01:08:42.240 align:center
"Oh, come on, Dad." "Am I your friend?"
01:08:44.479 --> 01:08:46.680 align:center
If the king's son becomes king,
01:08:46.760 --> 01:08:48.279 align:center
people will cry nepotism!
01:08:48.359 --> 01:08:50.160 align:center
I don't want your throne. Get lost!
01:08:50.240 --> 01:08:52.840 align:center
I'll have you bound and captive!
01:08:52.920 --> 01:08:55.319 align:center
That's for the next episode, not this one.