Shit!
TO FIVE YEARS OF GETTING SCREWED #iHateMyJob
TO FIVE YEARS OF SHEER BLISS #iLoveMyJob
Damn!
We live double lives.
One that we are living...
-Good night, sir. -Yes, good night. Good night.
Motherfucker!
And the other that we're portraying.
Sir, you're working pretty late these days.
-I love the job. -You ought to, sir.
Asshole!
But why the pretence?
To impress society.
So that society perceives us as happy, cool and successful.
If you want to grow in this company,
you need to make sure that your targets are achieved, okay?
Happy, cool and successful my ass!
Take social media updates, for instance.
Neerav Shah checked in to the Emirates Business Class lounge.
What was the need for this stupid update?
So everyone knows
that Neerav has gotten ahead in the race of life.
Look at this! "Having breakfast at Taj Lands End!"
Let Mishra and Shrivastav know that I dine at five-star hotels too!
Great!
"Travelling from
"Chhatrapati Shivaji Maharaj Terminal to Miami."
This is just the beginning.
He'll post photos
for as long as he's there and make everyone jealous.
What a lovely surprise!
Scrambled eggs by hubby at sunrise!
Here's the close, the mid and the wide.
She's not telling her friends, but rubbing it in their faces.
"Look! My husband loves me to bits.
"Love..."
Scram! Bloody fuck!
Parents think they have a keen eye for talent
and their children are gunners.
Inaya came first in the lemon and spoon race.
#proudmoment.
Everyone has a healthy lifestyle these days.
Munching on some soya tikka with nachani roti.
Oh, just drop dead!
Preparing for the marathon.
Running the marathon.
Finished the marathon.
Beat it, dickhead!
-Huh? -I wasn't talking to you.
As you saw, everyone is happy, cool and successful.
This is a lie as well as the sordid truth.
I have 1,567 friends on Facebook, but just 2 in real life.
Malhotra, aka Mal.
And Vaghela, aka Vaghela.
Just these two stood by me in all my troubles.
Not to mention they brought those troubles upon me!
-Boys! -Yeah!
Thank you.
So, how's work going?
Meh, I get by.
-What about you? -Same.
-And you? -Same old.
But if someone else were to ask the same question...
Hey! How's it going, guys?
Devika.
I had a crush on her in grade five.
We became fast friends in the eighth grade.
And now...
I'm just a Facebook friend.
Look, Devika is here!
Shall we see who she brought along?
-That jackass Arjun! -That asshole Arjun!
That butthead Arjun!
As kids, Pythagoras, Einstein and Newton didn't fuck us over
-as much as Arjun did. -On your marks, get set, go!
Arjun was never a step ahead,
but a kilometre ahead of us.
While we clapped,
he strummed the guitar.
We'd be elated if we scored 75%.
He'd cry even after securing 98%.
We sucked on lollipops
while that bugger devoured books.
We role-played trees
while he played the prince.
And ever since that day,
Arjun has been society's gold standard.
Whereas we are categorised as bloody substandard.
Come.
He's headed here.
I bet he needs a favour.
Guys, relax. Devika is with him.
It's not like she's our sister-in-law.
"Devika is with him." Dickhead!
Hi, guys.
-Hi, Devika. -Hi, Devika.
-Hello, Arjun. -Hello, Arjun.
Hi, guys. Can you do me a favour?
Could you drop Devika home?
An urgent meeting just came up,
or I would have dropped her off in my chauffeur-driven Mercedes.
She's with you, so you drop her.
Why should we leave our booze?
Come on, man!
No one's asking you to drop me right now.
Besides, who wants to go home so soon?
Carry on, we'll drop her.
In our driver-driven Ola!
I owe you guys one.
-Sam! -Yes, sir?
-Shots! -Okay, sir.
Put it on my tab.
There's no need for that.
There is, Mal.
It's your chance to have some good liquor, buddy!
-Are you fucking sponsoring, buddy? -Mal...
Okay, come on. Let's take a selfie.
-Let's take a selfie. -Selfie?
He's an asshole. Ignore him.
Nice!
-Babe, WhatsApp me the selfie. Okay? -Okay.
Bye.
Bye, guys.
Thanks.
-Let's get a round of shots. -Asshole.
He'll post this pic on Facebook and show off
that he left an amazing party for work.
Hmm.
You'll engage bots to help him get fake likes.
-Right? -Mal...
I don't help him. I do it for celebs. Okay?
Besides, it's my job.
And hang on.
At least I don't do stupid coding and hack cheap porn sites like you!
-Devika-- -Hang on a minute.
What's wrong with it?
This has been the norm for ages.
Earlier, we sought appreciation from the people around us.
Now, we do the same thing online on social media. Right?
Guys, shots.
How long have you been dating Arjun?
Around two to three months.
A few months!
Gosh! Why didn't you tell Gaurav?
He's hurt.
-Guys, will you shut up? -Shush!
-Listen, Devika. -Hmm.
Is Arjun your fourth boyfriend?
Fifth.
Shit.
You're not even in the top five.
-Sorry. -Will you zip it for two minutes?
Was Arjun the only guy you could find in the world?
I'm not marrying him; we're just dating.
She's dating a nut!
He's really not that bad.
-Really? -Yeah.
I mean... he's good-looking.
Arjun-1, Gaurav-0.
He works in a reputed company.
-Arjun-2, Gaurav-0. -0.
He draws a hefty salary.
-Arjun-3 and Gaurav... -0.
Your dad won't approve of him.
Dad!
He loves him. Dad loves him!
And that's an own goal.
Arjun stands at 4 and Gaurav, a big fat goose egg!
Gone with the wind.
-Double zero, zilch! -Guys, I can hear everything. Stop.
That was the intention, darling.
Fuck!
-Fuck! You guys are impossible, man! -It's okay.
-Bro, we'll win next time. -Piss off.
Tell me more about Arjun.
He's got a great sense of style...
-Bloody Arjun! -How much is it?
-Huh? -What?
Yes. Arjun-21 and Gaurav...
-What's Gaurav's score? -0.
The fare, dumbass!
-Oh! -When life isn't fair,
why bother with the fare?
All right.
-Bye. -Bye, guys.
-See you. -Love you too, Devika.
Fuck off, Mal.
Go.
Oye!
Go, get her.
What the hell, man!
Every mother knows when her son has been drinking.
And every son knows
that his mother is aware that he has been drinking.
But they both act as if nothing has happened.
Please don't stay up late for my sake.
If you're so concerned about me, then come home early.
Wake me up in the morning. I have to reach the office at 8 a.m.
Working on Sundays as well?
Call my boss and ask him
not to swamp me with work in that case.
Tell him, please.
The day I do that,
there will be a scandal in your office.
Listen.
Clean up after you're done eating.
I will. Good night.
Good night.
Oh, no!
Office on a Sunday?
-Just working hard. -Carry on, dear.
That's Pummy Aunty.
She adds a little spice to my fucked-up professional life.
Pummy Aunty has a magic touch.
My colleague gets to eat homemade food,
Pummy Aunty gets a little money,
and I get a little happiness.
Without sugar and with sugar.
He's got a better life than us.
He comes and goes as he pleases.
Right?
I can't do this anymore!
What's wrong?
Do you have kidney stones? Did you consult a doctor?
No, man!
I can't do this fucking job any longer.
I'm pissed.
It's so bloody boring, I feel like...
I wonder what I am doing here.
Then why don't you quit?
I can't just get up and quit...
Sir!
Meet me in my cabin, hmm?
Sorry, sir.
Don't forget to wash your hands.
-Sorry. -Hmm.
Yes, Gaurav.
So, what were you saying back there?
The job is boring, sir.
Hmm.
Look, man. A job is a job.
If it's entertainment you seek, go to the movies or watch plays.
Find yourself a girlfriend or girlfriends for that matter.
Go for two.
The company doesn't have an issue with it, okay?
Nobody has an inherent interest in their job.
That interest needs to be developed.
How do I develop interest, sir?
You're interested only in what the client is interested in.
I have no interest in what the client's interest is.
And, sir, no one is interested in what I am interested in!
Then how do I develop interest?
Wow!
Interesting.
Gopi, does the printer have the company's letterhead?
Yes, sir. One last page.
Ah!
Nice.
For what, sir?
Nice.
Means?
Fire!
Stand-by!
Parade, fire!
Reload!
Fire!
Down!
Gaurav?
You're home early.
Is everything all right?
No person in the world who has ever been fired
has ended up publicly accepting it.
What happened?
Well...
I quit my job.
I know what Mom will say.
"Why did you quit your job?"
Why did you quit your job?
I wasn't really loving my job,
and my boss and I didn't get along well.
"What will you do now?"
What will you do now?
I will look for a better job.
"Jobs don't grow on trees!"
Jobs don't grow on trees!
"What will society say?"
What will society say?
Oh, no!
What will Anu say?
Anu Aunty!
Arjun's mama!
Anu Aunty did not raise Arjun like a normal child
but like a case study.
Arjun won the interschool painting competition in the fifth grade.
He won the quiz competition in the seventh grade
and the interschool debate competition in the ninth grade.
And that's my Prince Charming!
Don't you want to become successful like Arjun?
Anu Aunty is the biggest influencer
-in our lives. -Good.
Her likes are like the high priest's approval
-and her comments, holy water. -Hmm.
Good, but it can be better.
For the ladies in the office as well as the neighbourhood,
Anu Aunty is their Facebook, Twitter as well as Instagram.
And she has been sticking her nose into my affairs since I was a child.
Son!
There's a dearth of jobs as it is.
And you resigned just like that?
We belong to middle-class families.
We can't survive without jobs.
You should have known this.
Damn it! I came here to give you good news,
but here I'm listening to bad news.
What good news?
Nothing special.
Arjun got promoted to GM.
His salary has doubled too.
He was already earning a lot.
Congratulations, Anu.
Thank you.
"Look at you and look at Arjun!"
Look at you and look at Arjun!
You lost your job.
Hang on a minute.
Did you want to quit and your boss let you,
or did he ask you to resign and you agreed?
It's a mix of both.
I wanted to resign.
He tried hard to retain me, but I didn't stay.
-Huh? -What?
This is stage number one of unemployment.
You hide the truth from society.
-Hi. -Shikha.
How are you?
-I'm great. How are you? -I'm well.
How are things, Gaurav?
-Um, Gaurav... -Actually--
He's planning on going abroad for further studies.
-Really! -Hmm.
Rajesh too.
Stage number two.
When both you and your mother conceal things from society.
Stage number three.
When society finds out.
Hey, Gaurav.
I see you around a lot these days.
Do you still have your job or not?
No, Uncle. I'm on sabbatical.
Oh, I see.
I think he got laid off.
Pooja, I have spoken to Arjun and lined up interviews for Gaurav.
If he sits on his hands, he'll never land a job that's some pumpkins!
So, what are your expectations?
Sir, money is not important.
I wish to know about your company's work culture.
Very good.
Like every big company, our company also has...
Yes, sir?
♪ So, long working hours Short lunch breaks ♪
♪ Late night con calls Early morning meetings ♪
♪ In short, come before the peon And leave after the watchman ♪
♪ Um, deadlines will be crazy Targets won't be easy ♪
♪ No personal life Forget girlfriend or wife ♪
So, what have you decided?
What have you decided then?
♪ Following orders Delegating work ♪
♪ Delegate your work To office juniors ♪
♪ Be the seniors' yes-man, yeah ♪
So, we believe in talent promotion.
♪ Lick the boss's ass ♪
♪ Get your colleagues sacked ♪
♪ Shoot the print, save the files Send the mail ♪
♪ Show dedication Even in the absence of work ♪
What have you decided then?
So, what have you decided?
Why are you quiet?
So then, what have you decided?
What have you decided?
-Fuck off! -Hey, will you stop gawking?
Have you decided yet?
So?
Hi.
How's the break going, Mr. Anti-Establishment?
Um...
I have a few good offers in hand, but I'm just taking my time.
I'm so jealous of you, man.
You don't have to worry about going to bed early or rising late.
Um...
Okay, I've got some work to do.
At this hour?
Yeah, man.
Some celebs are panicking
that their workout and cooking videos haven't garnered enough likes.
Yeah.
Bye!
-Devika... -Hmm?
Do you have five minutes?
Depends on what your intentions are.
My intentions are good.
So you didn't quit your job, you were fired.
It's because you told your boss that you didn't like your job.
Hmm.
Now that you have a few offers,
you don't wish to take them up because, once again,
the idea of a job doesn't entice you.
Correct?
Yeah.
You still can't keep anything from me.
Just like school days.
Yeah, man.
-We'd share everything. -Yes.
And look at us now.
This is our first conversation in a decade
that has lasted over ten minutes.
We were so close, man.
You know?
All the boys in class teased me about you.
Why?
At the school function, you danced to the song "Rambha Ho Ho Ho".
Oh!
Yes!
I had the biggest crush on you after that.
Really?
Then why didn't you try?
It'd have been futile.
You'd have left me in six months like you left your other boyfriends.
How is that wrong?
No. I mean,
if you want to explore the perfect option in your professional life,
you're right.
But if I explore the perfect option in my personal life,
it makes me wrong?
Sorry, I judged you.
That's fine.
You're not the first.
Anyway... forget about me.
You tell me.
So what have you decided?
Have you even thought of something?
Have you decided what you'll do, Gaurav?
Buddy, have you thought about what you want to do?
He's thinking.
I hope you are.
Um...
-He's thinking. -Hmm...
Yes, tell me.
Pal, you're the one who quit the job but my stomach is in knots!
Hard times are here for you, buddy.
Hey, why would you say that?
You took me from eating crap to crepe.
You can't abandon me midway.
Listen.
Aunty's jackfruit tasted like mutton,
whereas the mutton here tastes like jackfruit, man!
Okay. I'll hang up. Bye.
Hello! Listen up, man.
I have a few more customers.
I'm busy right now. I'll talk to you later.
Why are you lying, man? I'm willing to give you a commission.
I'm yet to hit rock bottom.
Then make do with my concern, dipshit!
Okay, bye.
I'll pay delivery charges too. It's not like you have other income!
I'm disconnecting the call.
How can you ignore the suffering of a fellow man?
I eat shit and crap bricks and eat bricks and crap shit!
You have no idea how I am even managing, man!
What a selfish guy!
And you can either focus on the food or her.
Yeah, fine!
Gaurav, the food's ready!
There's something about the food that mother's cook.
You could eat the same food every day and yet never get bored.
I wonder what they add to the food.
-What do you add? -What?
This aloo gobi, dal, dahi vada...
What do you add to them?
I've licked my fingers every time I've had it since I was a child.
I can eat this even when I grow old.
Mothers don't need to do anything special.
They prepare food with love.
Gaurav, have you thought about what you want to do?
Cheers.
Whoa!
Cheers, guys!
Have fun!
-Do you see, Vaghela? -Hmm?
-Every party has its own equation. -Hmm!
The person hosting the party boasts of making it big
and dares you to make it big if you can.
Hmm.
And sucking on his bloody pearls of wisdom are his juniors
who hover around him.
As if trying to say, "Hey, prick. We'll make it big someday too!"
And then there are others
who have achieved nothing in their lives
but act as if they're no less.
Listen.
Which category do we fall under?
-We're legendary men. -Hmm.
First, we abuse Arjun to his face. "Listen up, fucker."
Hmm.
And then, we attend his promotion party
and down all his free booze. Cheers.
Cheers.
Hey, look!
Nisha Paschija!
Who's Nisha Paschija?
The girl from school who began wearing a bra in the ninth grade.
Oh! Nisha Paschija!
Come on.
Let's go say hi for old-time's sake.
She brought her boyfriend along.
Bloody wretch!
Speaking of wretches, where's Gaurav?
He's sulking. God knows if he'll come or not.
You're here, prick! Come on.
-Boys, what's up? -We were waiting for you.
Guys, I have decided.
Hang on, let me come to my senses.
Yeah, down that drink.
-Enough of fucking working for others. -Hmm.
I will start my own business.
-Your own business? -Yes.
Vaghela!
Come here, man.
Did you drink before coming here?
-Damn! -Come on, guys. I'm serious.
It's not like we're joking.
Do you have the experience to set up a business?
Hmm? Do you have the funds?
Are you one of the Tatas, Birlas or Ambanis to establish a business?
Neither were Sachin and Mukesh.
Hey, Mukesh is an Ambani.
Sachin and Mukesh Bansal, dickhead!
-They founded Flipkart. -Yes.
Not just them, India has seen so many successful start-ups
-and successful entrepreneurs-- -Behind every successful start-up
are hundreds of failed start-ups.
They, too, wanted to establish their businesses.
-They're insolvent now. -Yes.
Didn't it happen to your dad too, Gaurav?
Why do you want to do it?
It's not necessary what happened with my dad will happen to me.
-That way-- -You don't understand.
Vaghela, tell him that we are middle-class people
and doing business is beyond us.
If Narayana Murthy thought like you,
he wouldn't have built a successful empire.
And a middle-class guy like you wouldn't have had a decent job!
You aspire to be Bill Gates, huh?
I just want to start a small business and be happy.
-I see. -Yes.
And what business might that be?
Will you launch an app?
Look, buddy.
All the apps worth building are already out there.
The only apps remaining are the ones that keep track of your poop, pee,
fart and your bowel movements!
And you better hurry before those get launched too.
-What will you do then? -Correct. He's right, man.
Talking to you guys is like talking to a brick wall!
If you can't digest our point of view, then don't ask for it.
I thought you guys were my friends.
-Hey-- -Hang on.
We are your friends. And we are advising you.
Friends my ass!
Did you even bother to ask me what my idea was, huh?
-You're just ranting on. -Hey, listen.
-Forget it. -What's your idea?
-Tell us. Just hear him out. -He wants to do business!
Tell us already, man. Come on.
-You want to know the idea. Listen. -Yes.
Come closer.
Here's my idea, fuckers! Shove it up your asses!
What the... He...
What does this mean?
Is he getting into the enema business?
Let that grumpy bastard go.
-Check that out. -What?
Poonam Tripathi...
Who is she?
A whisky on the rocks, please.
There are three prerequisites to setting up your own business.
Money, support and confidence.
I've never had money and support.
And these fuckers bloody screwed my confidence!
Cheers, sir.
Oye, hero!
Why are you moping out here alone?
Nothing, I just got a little philosophical.
Hmm.
What are you doing here?
Shouldn't you be in your loverboy's embrace?
So, must I hover around him
and send a message to the world
that I'm the woman behind that man's success?
Today's his day.
Let him enjoy all the attention.
Then it's back to me.
Say what you want,
but the lad has gotten ahead in the race of life.
Look at me.
I'm not even sure if I'll succeed in what I am planning to do.
What are you planning to do?
No sense in keeping it from you.
I have a business idea.
Interesting!
And what is that idea?
Meals cooked by mothers for office-going bachelors.
You'll be delivering lunch boxes?
In a way, yes.
Man, if you wanted to start a business,
you should've thought of something
-that is more-- -Something technical.
Develop an app and go digital, right?
Why get into something you have no knowledge of?
I pursued engineering for four years and took up a job for five years.
Now, I want to do something simple.
Something I like and where I can put my common sense to use.
My aim is not to make millions.
I want to make enough to keep the business going
and not go back to work for somebody else.
That's it.
You and Arjun are worlds apart, man.
You'd have been with me if I had been like Arjun, right?
Are you dropping a hint?
If I were dropping a hint, I would have asked you,
"Would you like to step out with me for a drink?"
Well...
I don't think I'll be missed today.
So, I guess we can.
-Really? -Yeah.
-Shall we? -Yeah.
Fuck off, Mal! You're so cheap!
Oh, shit!
How dare you?
-Get lost! -You asshole!
-He's lost it. -I'll break your face! Idiot!
Every time I'm about to score, that pisspot Mal poops on my parade!
-Hang on, bro! Hold it. -Have you lost it?
Hang on. What happened? What exactly happened?
He's so cheap!
-Cheap? -I know that, but what did he do?
You know what? See this.
-"A steamy kiss!"
It wasn't me.
I'm just a messenger. The Don Juan is someone else.
Where is that rogue?
Don Juan?
Could you do me a small favour?
Tell me.
Please don't tell Arjun I intend to start a business.
So, basically, you don't want Anu Aunty to find out.
I don't want my mom to find out.
I get it. Your dad thing...
Yeah.
Don't worry.
I don't tell Arjun everything.
Thanks.
She doesn't share anything with Arjun,
and he doesn't share anything with us.
Hmm.
But they tell each other everything.
Why don't you two get involved with each other?
-Do yourself a small favour. -Hmm.
Don't ever involve these two in your business.
Come on, they're my friends.
-Oh... -Sleep.
Please welcome Arjun Kapoor,
the newly promoted and youngest GM of Catalyst Capital.
Arjun, thanks very much...
-Hi, Dad. -...for joining me on the show.
-Thank you... -Hi, dear.
So, what's the plan for Catalyst Capital?
I want to pave the way for start-ups.
I want new ideas to grow.
Look at this boy.
He has reached dizzying heights, right?
Yeah.
And look at Gaurav.
Who knows if he'll make it in life?
I'm sure he will, Dad.
-We'll get in a meeting... -Hmm.
Anyway, good night.
Good night, my dear.
I heard a lunch box just came for me.
Hmm.
What is this?
What the hell is this?
You call this a quotation!
I wouldn't wipe my ass with it!
Which one of you fuckers spilt water on my chair?
You fly is open, sir!
Guys.
I got a lunch box.
Let go.
-Let me eat it, Sriram. -Sir...
Sir, you're Jain and this dish is made of a root vegetable.
You don't want to destroy your faith!
I'll sack you, creep!
-Sir... -It's so yummy, sir.
-Sir. -Nope!
Sir!
Bro, settle down with whoever sent the lunch box.
It's lip-smacking! Our lives will be sorted.
Dig in.
-Sir... Sir, a bite. -Please, sir.
Shut up! Out! Out...
-Sir. -What?
I think I know who sent this.
Is this your business idea?
Yes.
It's bang on!
So, tell me what's the plan.
-Test marketing. -Okay.
Will we get five customers from your office?
Easily.
We have five each from her office and my previous office.
I suggest that
we try this out for a month and we'll have our answer.
-We must operate at a minimal cost. -Exactly.
So, initially, we will need to deliver the food ourselves.
-Who is "we"? -As in...
Hey, hang on.
I won't go about delivering lunch boxes!
-Come on. Aren't you a brother? -Hey! No...
-Please, for my sake. -Hey!
Yeah, call me bro and screw me over!
Please, please, please! Won't you do it for me?
Fine, I'll deliver the lunch boxes at my office,
-but not to hers. -Excuse me!
I won't carry lunch boxes to the office.
Oh, no! No! No! I'll deliver them to your office.
The idea has merit
as does the plan.
But you need the balls to make this business successful. Yeah?
I have the bloody balls for it.
Well, now we need two more moms on board to cook the food.
Hmm.
Where should we look for them?
Yes. Tell me, son.
I need two more ladies like you, Aunty.
Beautiful like me!
No, Aunty. Helpful like you.
-Note down the number. -Go ahead.
Rastogi.
-Will the food that I make do? -Absolutely!
-Will I be paid Rs. 15,000 a month? -Without a doubt.
-Okay! -Okay.
-You've got a deal. -Okay.
The work requires extensive coordination, Mal.
I can't do this without you.
I will do everything in my power, buddy.
But I can't quit my job.
Of course, I understand.
Sorry, bro.
Here you go!
-Sorry, Gaurav. -No problem.
Mal!
Sorry, man.
-What took you so long? -Sorry. My car broke down.
-Hold this. -Hurry.
-Okay, I'll see you soon. -Bye.
Drive straight. Go that way.
What are you looking at, bloody chairwarmer?
Answer calls, go on.
-Pay attention to the phone! -Hello.
-Hey, here are your lunch boxes. -This is fantastic!
-This is an office. -This is fantastic.
-Don't eat it all. Give it to others. -They're heavy. A few of the others...
Yes? Can I help you?
Um, yeah.
-Um... -Looking for me?
No, I was...
I got the lunch boxes.
Nice office, man.
You came all the way here, so this calls for coffee.
-I'll be coming here every day. -Then we'll have coffee every day.
I've been waiting for so long, man!
My underwear is soaking wet in this scorching heat.
Did I ask you to travel by autorickshaw?
-Come on, just take the lunch boxes. -Did you sell your car?
-Hi, Shweta. How are you? -Oh! Hi, Gaurav.
Lunch boxes.
-You should also try it. Very good. -Yeah, sure.
Is Devika in today?
Hey! Where does he go at this hour every day?
I can follow him, ma'am, but that will cost you extra.
I see.
Focus on the task at hand first.
Fuck, man!
Is your mom visiting?
-I switched to a new lunch service. -I see.
Dude, order one for me too. This is literally amazing.
Ask Devika. It's her contact.
-Devika's? -Yes.
Brother!
We've acquired 50 customers in the last 4 weeks.
Think big.
Let's target one whole fucking area.
BKC or Lower Parel?
Um, BKC.
Should we distribute free meal samples within BKC one day?
You want to distribute free meals in all of BKC?
We'll go broke in a bid to distribute free sample meals.
No, Mal.
We will target potential customers only.
Unmarried office executives
who suffer from indigestion and mouth ulcers
and belch from eating outside food.
How do we go about sourcing the names and numbers of such specimens?
This fucker just complains about problems
but never suggests a solution.
Tell me where to get it from.
-From my ass! Take it. -Hand it to me.
Hmm. Here's a list.
DM the content mentioned at the back of the page to these people,
and let me know of the positive responses. Cool?
Hmm. Cool.
You'd dive into that chat window if you could!
The youth have become a slave to social media!
We need to send sample meals to 300 people.
Congratulations.
Mal, they've agreed to the sample meals
and not opted for a monthly service.
So what?
What if they gorge on our food, take a big dump,
say sorry and get going?
Think positive, man.
How does one stay positive with their balls in the mouth?
Yes, positive. Of course.
Thank you.
I should be thanking you.
I'm doing something genuine because of you.
Otherwise, people like me live in a fake world.
Right, Mal?
She's at it again, bro.
-Was it out of place? -Did I say something to you?
-Did I say anything right now? -Guys!
-If you felt offended-- -Please, guys!
Can you fight after we get done with the calculation?
You can do this later on. Come on.
-Fine. -Fine!
So, I was saying if we take five lunch boxes per mom,
then we would need 60 moms to make 300 lunch boxes.
The sampling is in a week.
How do we scout 60 moms in a week?
ACP Pradyuman would certainly have set out on this task.
But it looks like
it's up to Charlie's Angels to see it through.
Ka-pow!
It's not like you have to inaugurate a showroom.
Don't make excuses.
Please come on board.
-Write down her name. -That sounds good.
-Done. -Okay.
You organised a religious discourse just last week.
Nothing doing.
I am passing on your names and contact details. Okay?
-This is also a noble deed. -Yes.
It's better than fucking...
I mean, messing with your daughter-in-law.
Fuck your soap! Enough with the excuses.
Should I tell your son that you read erotica in the afternoon?
Should I?
It's good. You'll make some money. What's the harm?
You know? Gaurav has started a business of packed meals.
Yes, Pummy visited me. She asked me to join him.
Thank you, Aunty.
Thank you.
Good afternoon. Analogue.
Fizzworks.
These seven lunch boxes are for Catalyst Capital.
You are in such dire straits
that you're working as a delivery boy.
You did engineering only to do such a menial job!
I hope you know what a big asshole you are.
It's evident who the asshole is.
Destroyed but not defeated!
Listen...
Does Pooja Aunty know?
Look, Arjun. This is between us.
Don't drag my mother into this, please.
Who's telling your mom, bro?
It's the least I can do for you, Gaurav. Hmm?
Yes, but there is one problem. I...
I don't hide anything from my mother.
Hmm.
All right, you deliver the boxes while I go...
MOM
What are you doing? Talk to her.
We'll be having a long chat after I go home anyways.
See. Aunty has messaged you.
"Come home. I won't say a word."
Whenever I've messed up
and Mom said, "Come home, I won't say a word,"
you have no idea of the shit that has happened with me.
-When will you mend your ways? -Not the bat, Mom!
-Not the rolling pin, Mom! Please! -Don't do it!
Not the broom, Mom!
-Mom! -Gaurav!
This time, I shall not concede defeat.
I will go fully prepared.
I'll play on the front foot, boss!
What does that mean?
Suppose that you're my mom and Anu Aunty has poisoned your mind.
What will you ask me?
Hmm.
I would ask you...
-So, you want to-- -"Start your own business?"
Yes, Mom.
-Despite knowing-- -"What happened with your father?"
Fine, you want to do a business, but--
"You call serving packed meals a business?"
Son, why are you--
"Hell-bent on damaging our reputation?"
-Let it go, Pooja-- -"Talking to him is futile."
So let's end this discussion here.
I don't know why you're so hurt.
I'm not disobeying you. I'm merely doing what I want.
You may think I am wrong, but I know that I am right.
You don't understand, and I'm not able to explain to you.
So, please!
Let's put an end to this.
Besides, it's 9 o'clock and you have to take your pills.
And it must be time to give Arjun his bedtime milk, Aunty!
-Did you see that? -Hello?
He just doesn't listen!
Yes, Devika?
That sounds like the voice of a man who is being suppressed.
Hmm.
All right. Let me lift your mood.
So, we were expecting 150,
but we've received positive responses from 200 people.
I think you should do it, man!
He sounds out of his mind.
If Arjun was here...
You're his mother. Knock some sense into him.
-Did you hear me, Gaurav? -Look, we've got a great response...
-Enough with your insolence! -And we should...
Listen, I'll have to call you back.
Um, oh!
You will not start such a worthless business!
I have made up my mind, Mom. I will do this business only.
Gaurav...
Gaurav!
Bro, come on board full-time.
Let's fucking do this, Mal.
I can't do this without you. What's on your mind?
Is your mom still angry?
This is like a special episode.
God knows how long it will drag on.
What hurts is that it was her idea and I don't have her approval.
Actually, I don't blame her.
My dad would've reacted in the same way had it been me in your stead.
In fact, he would never have allowed me to do it.
Parents are also under pressure from society.
"What will society say if our child goes astray
"or does something unconventional?"
You know what?
It's people like Anu Aunty who instil this fear in others.
There's an Anu Aunty in all of us for that matter.
In my mom, your dad and even in me.
She keeps warning us,
"If you don't live up to society's expectations,
"you won't be labelled a winner!"
Now ask yourself, Devika.
There's an Anu Aunty within you too.
Do you really want that perfect partner you are in search of,
or is it just to impress society?
So that they can say, "Wow! Look at Devika.
"She's got such a lovely choice."
This company has been your baby, Mal.
You're doing well at your job. Then why do you wish to leave?
Why?
For how long will I fear the Anu Aunty inside me?
Huh? What?
Sir, I mean...
I want to give myself a chance.
I knew you would leave someday.
I won't stop you if you've already made up your mind.
But you know our company doors are always open for you.
Yes, sir.
Thank you.
What did you say the name of the company was?
It ought to be interesting.
Suggest something. Huh?
-Malpua Tiffins! -Disgusting!
Khana Khazana!
Sanjeev Kapoor will shove chilli sauce up your ass!
Mast Dabbawala?
Rack your brains; don't suggest rubbish.
You suggest a name, schmuck!
Annapurna?
That's a brand of flour.
Handiya Dabbe!
Too desi.
Gourmet Meals.
Too modern!
Lethal Meals.
Just serve the tea, man.
I'll serve you a lethal meal for sure!
"Lethal Meals!"
Hang on a minute. What is our company's motto?
To deliver the food made by mothers to children.
And why is the food made by mothers so special?
It's because mothers don't look at cooking as a duty.
The food they make is infused with their love,
concern and positivity.
Wow!
You've evolved into a poet!
-My, oh, my! -Hey, I'm serious.
Think along those lines.
-Mother India's Lunch Boxes. -Damn!
Vaghela, hush. Let me think.
-Brothers! -Yes.
Gaurav Shukla.
Sharad Malhotra.
Co-founders, Maa's Magic.
"Maa's Magic."
"Co-founder."
It has a nice ring to it.
Right?
That will be Rs. 10,412.
That does not have a nice ring to it though.
Vaghela, you owe us some money, right?
What money?
-It was around Rs. 10,000. -When was this?
-Remind him. He always forgets. -Oh, yes!
Hey, did you forget again?
Okay, now we are even.
-Did I even owe you? -Here, have tea.
-It's refreshing. Go on, drink it. -Yes, it's ginger tea. Go on.
-Hello, Aunty. -You've joined the uprising too!
See you, Aunty.
No, I went through the quote. It's fine.
Listen, I'm confirming V Drop as our delivery partner.
-Okay? -Go ahead.
Okay, it's confirmed on our end.
...were bad and the people there, you know they had such...
-I mean, I... -One second, baby. One second.
Yeah, we can do an online transfer as well.
Okay, I'll send you the details.
Thank you.
♪ Congratulations and celebrations... ♪
-Woo-hoo! -Here we go.
-Congratulations. -Thank you.
-Have some. -Woo-hoo!
-Let's get another round of drinks. -Whoa!
Thank you.
-See... -So, how does it feel?
It's the result of positive thinking.
Who knows?
Do you see that, Vaghela?
-Huh? -That's what I really like.
I became his partner in the business.
I endured his share of the beating since we were children.
-We did. -Fine!
And now look.
To whom did he offer the first bite of the cake?
Come on, man!
Along with his professional life,
our friend is trying to sort out his personal life too.
If we don't support him, who else will?
Since when did you become the bigger person, dickhead?
Starting now!
We need to start operations in Lower Parel along with BKC too.
Hmm.
We'll need to rent office space and hire people.
-We'll need at least Rs. 15 lakh. -Hmm.
Our company account has Rs. 10 lakh left.
From where do we arrange the remaining Rs. 5 lakh?
-Ask your mom. -She'll slap me!
-Should we borrow it from Vaghela? -He won't give two hoots.
Devika?
I'd have asked provided she had money.
-Let's take a bank loan. -Or you could borrow it from me.
We need a couple of lakhs, not a few thousand.
I was talking about Rs. 5 lakh.
From where did you get that much money?
Parents always save up money for their children.
If I invest in your business, my money is bound to multiply.
My children will dream bigger too.
Don't refuse.
Please.
Now, we just need to find the right resources
that will give wing to our venture.
Don't teach me customer care.
My experience far exceeds the number of years
you've spent on this planet! Understood?
-So, I have to call you guys "sir". -No, Uncle.
-You'll call me "uncle"! -No, sir.
Guys, decide.
-So, you're Gaurav and you're Mal. -Yes.
What kind of a name is Mal?
It's actually a short form for Malhotra.
I'm not sure if we're taking interviews or giving them.
Tell us about yourself then.
I hacked into the company's account,
and they sacked me.
Huh?
OUR ARMY IS READY
GAURAV SHUKLA OUR ARMY IS READY
The work was a lot of fun, and it was so much fun to work!
-There's this. -Very nice.
Which one do you like?
Difficult to choose.
Everything you do is good.
Don't be so cheesy, man!
Our news had reached places where our lunch boxes hadn't yet.
We weren't masking our lives.
And the best part was
people were loving us for what we were.
Hmm. Correct.
Take a look, Gaurav. What do you think?
You're thinking way too ahead.
I'm building a prototype of the app. We'll launch it the day we're ready.
Seriously! I never thought a job could be such a lot of fun!
Yup!
-Yeah, vamoose. -Yes!
Investors were showing interest in us,
but we weren't showing interest in investors.
Joining me on the show today are two young entrepreneurs,
Gaurav Shukla and Sharad Malhotra,
who've launched their own start-up.
It's called Maa's Magic.
It's Mumbai-based,
and it's delivering on the promise of food.
Gentlemen, appreciate you joining us
-here on the programme. -Humbled to be on the show.
But I want to understand from you.
Engineering to business, how did that happen?
Well, it actually started with me getting fired.
That's actually true.
Hey, isn't that Gaurav?
-Congratulations, Pooja. -Thank you.
Congrats.
Some people are just plain fortunate.
Some people are hard-working, Anu.
People say that there's no food like the one a mother makes...
Impressive.
So, I think we just spotted a need...
-Hmm? -See that?
Every success party has its equation.
On the one hand is
-someone who has made it big. -Hmm.
And that's my brother.
Mine too.
Yeah!
Cheers!
You're all glammed up for the party.
But that guy isn't sparing you a glance.
Today is his day.
It's my day too.
But aren't I with you?
-So sorry, man. -It's okay, man. We understand.
-Hey, I'll get you another drink. -Yeah.
Caipiroska with extra mint leaves, right?
Perfect.
-I'll just get it. -Thanks.
Hmm. So, what were you saying?
Hmm? Me?
All I was saying
was that, even after becoming successful,
he gives you as much attention as he used to when he was broke.
Think about it, missy.
It's not every day that such an ardent lover comes along.
The rest is up to you and the Anu Aunty within you.
Act normal, he's coming.
I am normal.
-There you go, madame. -Thank you.
-What were you talking about? -The usual nonsense.
-Nonsense! -Hmm.
Speaking of nonsense, where is Arjun?
There he is. He's here.
That jackass Arjun!
That asshole Arjun!
That butthead Arjun!
The jerk must be green-eyed.
Congratulations. Congratulations.
Thanks, man.
-Hi, boys. -Hi.
-Hi, baby. -What's up?
I'm really happy for you guys.
Thank you.
Yeah, but I'm a little sad as well.
I admit you guys did what you said,
but you have such low aspirations!
You hired a team of ten people and started a company.
You fed a few hungry people and made it on TV one time.
Come on, man! If you call this a success,
I'll have to throw a party every week!
Things were different when we were kids.
You used to be ecstatic about coming third in the race.
You used to start dancing when you scored 75% in exams.
You've all grown up now,
so you need to start thinking big, man.
Arjun, I think you should take it a bit easy.
I don't think this is--
Oh! I'm so sorry, baby! I'm so sorry.
I'm really sorry. I didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings.
I'm so sorry, hmm.
I'm your friend, man.
I said what I felt was right. Please don't mind.
Hey, Arjun!
Hi.
Anyway...
I'll be right back.
Mal! Mal! Mal, buddy!
This is Chateau Lafite 1865.
Very, very rare.
Only for special occasions.
If you wish to pop and fucking pour,
go ahead.
Take it.
Go on, take it.
Congratulations again.
So proud.
If this wasn't our party,
I would have smashed this bottle on his head!
Who even fucking invited him?
Why don't you give it back to him?
Why do you put up with his crap?
Words will do him no good.
We'll let our actions do all the talking.
To him and his mama!
-Gaurav Shukla and Sharad Malhotra? -Yes.
Please come in.
Sir, the idea is to reach a wider consumer base.
So, the plan is to grow beyond certain pockets
and expand Maa's Magic all across the city.
Yes, but...
How do you plan on achieving it with your existing business model?
I was just getting there, sir.
Sir, we'll have Maa's Magic app do it.
App?
Yes, sir. The function will be based
on the same principle as Ola and Uber.
The moment our users log in to the app,
they'll be displayed
the moms and menus within a two-kilometre radius.
And even if they place the order, by say 11 o'clock,
we can deliver by lunch.
-Sounds interesting, right? -Hmm.
But what about the back end?
Is there a back end in place or...
We do have a competent technical team working for us.
We also have a growth strategy in place.
Please allow us to run you through the two-way action plan.
Guys, I liked what I heard. Hmm?
This sector is still largely untapped.
So, it's a good thing for me.
You guys are on the right track.
I won't lie to you. You're sitting on a gold mine.
If you can crack Mumbai, then Delhi, Bengaluru and Chennai...
The sky is the limit, guys.
So, keep going at it.
-Thank you, sir. -Good.
-Nice meeting you. -Thank you. Lovely meeting you.
Actually, I'll tell you what.
As a gesture of goodwill,
my company will bear the development cost for your app.
How do you like that, huh?
That's amazing, sir.
-It's amazing? -Yes, sir.
-Amazing? -Yes, sir.
Good, I like the energy. Go.
-Thank you. -Thank you, sir.
-Hope to see you soon. -Oh, you'll see a lot of me now.
Yes!
Yes! Yes! Yes!
Andheri done. Goregaon done.
Central is also done.
Great job, guys.
We're just left with enrolling the moms from town.
By when can we do this?
15 days.
Our app will be ready in 15 days too.
Wrong. It'll be ready in 14 days.
These Gen Zs come across as meek,
but they certainly do exude confidence.
Excuse me, bro!
It's coding, not a piece of cake.
Bro.
I've scored more girls
than the times you've jerked off, hmm?
Bro.
Respect, bro.
-We're done. Bug off. -Yes.
So, what do you think?
The look is sexy.
The customer end is really good, bro.
Who will upload the menu from the company's end every day?
The menus will have to be uploaded by the aunties, bro.
This is where the fuck-ups can happen.
We can't take a chance.
We'll have to train them.
But who will do it?
Hmm?
Precisely...
Did you buy a new bag, Simmi?
I see you bought gold bangles!
I thought you didn't notice.
-Not a chance. -Aunties!
If you're done flaunting wealth, shall we move on to the app's demo?
Thank you.
So, let us start by learning how to upload a photo.
Do all of you here use WhatsApp?
Really!
There isn't a single oldie in the world
who doesn't use WhatsApp.
-Okay. That's great, Aunty. -True.
I want all of you to take selfies.
-Okay. -All right, a selfie.
Bro! Simmi!
Could you teach me how to pout?
It's really simple. Watch me.
Push both lips forward just as you do while kissing,
and then pull them back in a little.
Very good, Aunty. Upload that photo now.
-Is she Gaurav's special someone? -How would I know?
I'm sure he's hitting on her.
All right, coming to the dish you've made today.
Type the name of the dish below the photo
and click on the "Upload" button. Okay?
BALLS GRAVY
-Aunty. -Hmm?
-It's "chickpea gravy." -Hmm.
Not "balls gravy."
Whose balls did you pick? Husband's or father-in-law's?
Man!
Your aunties are really cute.
Yeah, cute and crazy.
Hmm.
You didn't have to give me such an expensive treat.
I had fun doing it.
It's on the company's account.
A small token of appreciation from Maa's Magic.
Cheers to your company and my break-up with Arjun.
You broke up with Arjun?
Yeah, man.
So full of himself. Too much to handle.
-More wine, please. -Sure, sir.
Why are you so happy?
Well, with the defending champion retired hurt,
the challenger has better chances.
Who told you that you stand a chance?
Look, I may be a tad stupid, but I am not a twit.
You're really getting confident!
Analyse the stats, ma'am.
We meet regularly,
the length of our phone calls is steadily increasing,
and we practically chat all day.
So, exit polls suggest that Gaurav will come to power this time.
Okay, on a serious note.
Where do you think this is heading?
What do you think?
I think it's quite evident since the eighth grade.
What's important is what you think.
I'm thinking.
Oh, okay! You'll think and let me know.
With the launch of the app, we project our growth at 20%, sir.
-Yeah. -Hmm.
Frankly, guys.
I think you are greatly underplaying yourself.
You guys can easily achieve 50% growth, really.
Any big company would want to acquire you
when they feel that Maa's Magic is the most happening start-up.
Don't you want a multinational to acquire you?
Don't you want to grow big? Like, really obscenely big?
-But, um... -We do, sir.
You're smart lads. You guys will do it.
You'll find a solution.
So... we'll have to start serving two meals.
Will we be serving lunch as well as dinner then?
Yes.
Does that mean we'll be hiring more people?
No, we can't or our profits won't increase.
But that will be too much work.
Look, I understand, Prateek,
but it's just a matter of a few months.
And if we make profits, we will all get a share, right?
Guys, we have to do this.
Let's do this.
Okay?
Let's do it.
Done.
Pummy, why have you taken on the trouble of cooking dinner too?
What are you saying?
He's like a son to us.
He wants to do something in life.
Who will support him if not us?
Guys, guys!
Maa's Magic has become the most downloaded app
in all of Mumbai!
It hasn't even been 24 hours since it was launched!
-Whoa! -Wow!
-Fabulous! -This calls for a celebration!
-Absolutely. -Let's party!
-Whoa! -Yay, let's celebrate!
Our orders and customers rose, but our profits...
We were expecting much higher profits.
How did this happen, Viraf?
Our profits are just 30% versus the projected 50%, Gaurav,
because the cost to the company has increased.
Deliveries, logistics, office overheads, salaries...
Everything has increased.
May I suggest something?
It's a bit drastic, but...
-Please tell us, sir. -Tell us, sir, please.
Okay. What's your biggest overhead?
Collecting lunch boxes from the moms and their salaries.
Why don't you try centralised kitchens in certain areas?
Sir, you want us to do away with the moms?
I am merely suggesting
that you could try it out in one of the areas.
You can try it at BKC and see how it goes.
Those aunties helped you establish Maa's Magic.
And you're asking them to leave?
It's wrong and unethical.
My hands are tied. It's the company's decision.
Gaurav!
Did you once think how those aunties would feel?
I understand, son.
Why do you worry so much?
This wasn't your decision.
It is our dreams that decide our paths.
When our dreams felt the need, they brought us together.
Now, our dreams tread different paths.
It's really that simple, son.
Don't overcomplicate it.
Can I tell you something?
I really enjoyed working with you.
I'm really sorry, Aunty.
You are saying the same thing again, son.
I have made gajar halwa.
You must have it, hmm?
I'll go and get it.
Here it is, sir. This is the kitchen area.
It's built across 4,000 square feet.
There are a dozen burners,
and the equipment is made of pure steel.
It's a hi-tech and modern state-of-the-art kitchen, sir.
Twenty chefs can work at once.
What do you say, sir?
This is a once-in-a-lifetime deal.
What was just a dream had now become our mission statement.
Moms had been replaced by professional chefs,
and mortars and pestles by a centralised kitchen.
Rotation will double our speed.
-Yes. -No room for mistakes.
Check on that, please.
Guys!
In one week, BKC has earned
as much as Lower Parel earns in one whole month.
I think it's a great start, guys.
Thank you, sir.
Everyone was speaking the language of deadlines, targets and PPTs.
The winds of professionalism blew harder,
but personal equation felt suffocated.
Is this our lunch?
Yes, but it tastes different.
Hmm.
So, as per our latest data,
we have lost 15% of our customers in Lower Parel
and 25% in Andheri.
It's a bit of a concern.
Relax, guys.
Even though we've lost 40 customers, we've acquired another 50.
But, sir, our most loyal customers--
Keep emotions aside and focus on sustenance, all right?
Got to go.
Son of a bitch!
Our likes have dropped, and the comments are just filthy.
What should we do, guys?
Do I have to spell it out for you?
Buy social media likes to counter bad publicity!
Talk to Devika!
I do realise that this is a problem.
We're not taking this lightly
because, you know, we're not dealing with numbers,
we're dealing with people's emotions
and they are extremely connected to what we...
You know, it's like a community that we have built.
-So, we'll have to make sure that we-- -Sorry, guys. Got a call.
It feels like I've come out with Arjun.
Yes, that's great. Sure, sure. Let's do it.
Yes.
The numbers show that we were progressing at a good pace,
but the faces told a different story altogether.
Why have you lost interest in your work?
What's this?
How do I show interest, Gaurav?
We're no longer interested in what our clients' interest is.
You're only interested in the investors, right?
And the company has no interest in where my interest lies!
So, how do I show interest, man?
We achieved one milestone after another in these three months,
but there was still a void inside.
I wonder why.
Gaurav.
You've started coming home late again.
Work gets stressful, Mom.
In your own company too?
Gaurav, what about dinner?
-Hello, Aunty? -Hello, son.
How are you?
I am well.
Do you know what happened today?
I cooked extra food by mistake.
I can't believe I'm no longer a part of Maa's Magic.
I'm sorry, Aunty.
I know you're hurt.
No, son. But I do feel bad
that the number of moms associated with Maa's Magic has lessened.
I had always wanted Maa's Magic to become a smashing success
and be launched in Bengaluru too.
Why Bengaluru, Aunty?
Actually, my elder son Sameer lives there.
I thought he would also get to eat food made by a mother.
I'm sorry, son.
Please don't mind.
I couldn't help but share my feelings
with you, son.
Look after yourself.
I'll hang up now.
Okay, Aunty.
-Bye. -Bye.
We've stooped so low in a bid to put Arjun down.
Maa's Magic has no moms left.
In a few days, the magic will be gone too.
What are you thinking, Mal?
The same as you.
Then turn the car around.
Let's fucking go back.
Turn around. Fuck this shit!
What do you mean you want to go back to the way things were?
I don't understand.
Sir, this is not how we want to do business.
Our service and office culture has taken a hit, sir.
I'm sorry. We can't afford this, not even at the cost of growth.
I have explained this to you before.
Business runs on facts and figures, not on emotions.
That might be true,
but we want to run Maa's Magic on emotions.
Have you guys lost it?
Who would want to buy your company?
-It's fine even if nobody does, sir. -It's not fine with me!
I didn't invest in your company for this!
I am a part of this company too. Don't forget that, okay?
Sir, in that case, we will return your money.
Mal?
He's talking some bullshit. Please reason with him.
He is right, sir.
If this is what you think, then I think we should...
cordially part ways.
"Cordially part ways"?
Yes, sir.
Do you think this is a joke?
"Cordially part ways!"
You are going to regret this decision
really big time.
All right, sir.
You will get back all the money you have invested.
I will get back the money I have invested.
Oh, wow!
Do you think
I run a goddamn charity?
Listen up, guys!
I will get my investment back
based on the company's current valuation.
That's...
What? You're literate, right?
Read the exit clause in the contract! Go have a look.
You'll find it over there.
Go on!
Let's go, Gaurav.
"Cordially... part ways."
I'll fucking show you what it means to cordially part ways!
As per the company's current valuation,
we owe him Rs. 10.5 crore.
Do we have that much money?
The reserve has Rs. 10.6 crore.
Fine, let's use the reserve to pay him back.
Are you sure?
That will leave us with just Rs. 10 lakh.
With that money, we could either pay the vendors
or pay the staff their salaries.
Let's pay the staff their salaries first.
I'll speak to the vendors
to hold off on the PDCs for a few days.
Yes, let's do that.
Fine.
Sir, they want us to hold off on encashing the PDCs.
Your fall out has screwed us over.
-You want your payment, right? -Yes.
-I'll give it to you. -You will?
Hmm.
All right, sir. In that case, I'll return their cheques.
No.
If you want your money, keep the cheques with you safely
and do precisely...
as I say.
Breaking news from Mumbai.
The co-founders of Maa's Magic were taken into police custody.
One of their vendors Rajesh Khokale has accused them of fraud.
What does the future hold for Maa's Magic and its co-founders?
Only time will tell.
Do you think we will have to close the company down?
In a shocking development,
both the co-founders of Maa's Magic have been arrested for fraud.
Apparently, the PDCs paid...
Every baby lizard thinks it will grow up to be a crocodile.
Do something.
Do something, Gaurav.
We need to do something.
What should I do?
Do anything! You always have solutions.
Just solve this.
Looks like Maa's Magic had bitten more than it could chew.
-Both founders have been detained... -Gosh! Why is this happening?
...in Chembur Police Station.
-This was bound to happen! -With the company in deep financial...
The young blood think they can do anything.
The entire family is jinxed.
Looks like Maa's Magic is going to need magic
to come out of this slump.
Bro! Do whatever, man!
Just don't let this company shut down.
You have a visitor.
Yeah, I think it's a fantastic offer.
I know.
What do you say, Gaurav?
Let's mull over it.
You guys are such imbeciles!
You're in the midst of a shitstorm,
yet our company is interested in acquiring Maa's Magic.
We are offering Rs. 30 crore upfront.
You'll have a 49% stake.
You should be kissing my feet, Gaurav,
and you want time to think! Huh?
Yes.
-What are you doing? -Mal, please.
Fine, think it through.
But remember that people forget old news
only when they hear a fresh piece of news.
When you get released on Monday,
the media will either reiterate old news
that "Maa's Magic is finished! It's all over!"
Or they will air fresh news
that "Maa's Magic is back."
Decide what kind of Monday you want it to be.
Let me know.
What are you doing, huh?
That's a fantastic offer and you're being pompous!
This isn't being pompous.
They're taking advantage of our situation.
But we are also benefiting from this.
How so? Have you read their clauses?
It's a three-year lock-in period with them owning a 51% stake.
That's not acceptable.
Look, man.
For Rs. 30 crore, anything is acceptable to me. Okay?
You're still running after money.
We started this company for the sake of our happiness.
The one time we chose money over happiness,
look what it did to us.
If 51% stake is with Arjun,
he'll order us around and we'll have to suck up to him!
Why must you go on an ego trip
-when it comes to Arjun? -What ego trip?
By Monday, Maa's Magic will be finished.
What are you going to do then?
Look, it's only wise to desert a sinking ship
because it's destined to doom! So, make the deal.
"Sinking ship"?
Do you know what your fucking problem is, Mal?
You never considered Maa's Magic as your own.
Right!
-Do you know what your problem is? -What?
You think Maa's Magic is yours.
-You built it single-handedly. -Yes, it's mine.
It was my idea!
I started it, and I have every right to defend it.
-Right! I've done nothing! -What have you done?
Didn't I invest my energy
-or my emotions? -Balls!
Didn't I invest my time and quit my job?
You quit your job, motherfucker,
only once you saw potential in Maa's Magic!
Or you'd rather stay on the sidelines and pass comments!
What should I have done? Tell me what I should've done!
Should I have quit my job and sat idle like you always do?
I have responsibilities.
Unlike you, I don't have a mom
who earns and can put food on the table.
Don't use responsibilities as an excuse
if you don't have the balls to take risks!
-Oh, you have the fucking balls! -Way more than you.
You were born a businessman! Right, asshole?
Go and salvage your company!
I have nothing to fucking do with your company whatsoever, get it?
-Fuck you, Mal! -Fuck you, too!
Make yourself scarce, fucker.
-They're here. Ready the camera. -Here they come.
Come on...
What do you have to say?
-Speak up, sir! -We want answers.
-Please say something, sir. -Back off, please.
-Give way, please... -Please tell us, sir.
-Hang on, give way. -Sir! Sir...
They will answer you. Give them way.
-Please move aside. -Please...
-Give us answers... -Please move aside.
-What was the reason? -Why did you resort to fraud?
-Gaurav! -Let him go.
-Answer us, Mr. Shukla! -Come on.
Say something. The media wants answers.
We want answers.
Both the co-founders have been granted bail.
But the question remains. Is this the end of Maa's Magic?
Oh, Pooja. Don't you worry.
-Everything will be fine. -Okay.
Gaurav is home.
Gaurav...
Please don't say anything.
I've heard enough from everyone.
I don't have the strength for more.
Everyone thinks it's my fault, so it must be true.
No, my son.
I admit to it.
You've put up with me
ever since I was a little boy.
Please forgive me!
Forgive me.
This is all I have for now.
Please take it.
I'm sorry we lost your money.
You can curse us all you want.
Why would I curse you, sir?
Look, if a fly were to fall in your tea,
I wouldn't charge you for it.
Besides, profit and loss are part and parcel of business, right?
Leave this aside.
I will give you a special tea.
Here, keep this.
Give me a special.
Come on!
Let it be.
Your tab is already running.
Today's tea is on me.
Hand the cup here.
Don't cry over lost money.
Be glad your son is back on track.
I just wanted Gaurav to take up a job.
But somehow, today, I'm not happy about it.
Just talk to her.
I don't get you.
If he doesn't respond, just forget it.
Besides, after what happened, I don't think you guys had a future.
Gosh!
And tell me one thing. Would your dad be okay with him?
Forget Dad, would you be okay with him?
Think practically, the way you've always been doing.
Use your head!
And you know what? What happened was for the best.
You saved yourself a great deal of embarrassment.
You're home, Gaurav.
How did the meeting go?
-Excuse me, sir. -Yes?
Pooja! Please come in.
I need five minutes of your time.
Gaurav.
Do you have two minutes?
Sure, Mom. Tell me.
Take a seat.
You know, normally children say this to their parents.
But for the first time,
a mother will break this news to her child.
I quit my job.
What?
Well, parents get a similar shock when children say the same.
But why did you quit your job?
The last few days have taught me
that if the happiness of parents lies in that of their children,
then parents must let their children do what brings them joy.
This is my provident fund payout.
And this is my gratuity.
Son, if you want,
you can quit this job
and revive Maa's Magic if you please.
What if I fail yet again?
So, what's new in it?
Aren't we used to it?
What happened now, son?
Well, our dreams took a new turn.
Really?
Yes, Aunty.
He's here.
-Let me get that. -Here you go.
-Good luck, son. -Thank you, Uncle.
-Shall we go? -Yes.
Please, Aunty.
-Fantastic! -Thank you.
-Gaurav, my brother! -How are you, Nilesh?
Bro, my heart, abdomen and intestines are thanking you!
You have no idea.
The dal, rice and rotis
had been substituted with digestives, antacids and enema.
What amazing food! She also likes it.
-Yeah? -Yes.
Guys, look who's back!
Maa's Magic!
-Wow! -Whoa!
Congratulations!
Dig in!
-Hello? -Hello, sir.
I've heard that Maa's Magic is back in business.
When do you plan on starting delivery to Lower Parel?
Yes, you heard right.
But it will be a while before we get to your locality.
We are eagerly waiting for Maa's Magic, sir.
All the best. Thank you, sir.
Thank you.
Despite your many screw-ups,
what is it you're trying to prove?
Forget about me, Aunty.
Tell me what you've been trying to prove all these years.
That if you don't stick to tried and tested methods, you'll fail!
I'm glad Sachin Tendulkar didn't grow up in our locality, Mom.
Or she'd have taunted him and made his life hell.
"Look, he gave up studies for cricket!"
If Picasso lived here, she'd have lectured the hell out of him!
"Son, painting doesn't fetch much. Find a well-paying job instead."
And she'd have scolded poor Shakespeare every day
for focusing on English literature instead of math and science!
God forbid Rahul Dravid were her son.
Then he arguably would've topped his MBA
and been giving a PowerPoint presentation in some corporate house!
Thank God they ignored people like you and followed their hearts!
Who are you to decide someone's success or failure?
How can I be a failure
for not becoming something I never wanted to be?
The only person who gets to decide if I am successful or not is me.
And if you have the slightest problem with it,
then please don't come over.
Kids are bound to behave childishly.
But I've seen an adult act childish for the first time.
Yes, so you better not be childish!
-Excuse me, sir. -Yes?
-Goons have abducted your mother. -What?
My boss told me to say this to you, sir.
I'm just an intern, sir.
Tell him that his dad is a crone's bitch!
I haven't even been confirmed, sir.
You never will be if you keep this up.
-Adi, you jerk! -You fuckface, Gaurav!
-How are you? -I'm good.
Okay, sir.
You tell me. All good?
-Take a seat. -Yes. Please sit.
So, how's everything going?
That's when I understood.
So, that's what happened.
I heard, man.
And you won't believe we were thinking of acquiring Maa's Magic.
Before we could make an offer...
you know?
But anyway,
I'm glad your company's back.
So, tell me. What's the plan now?
Nothing.
I am happy with the way the company is doing.
Excuse me.
You're Gaurav Shukla, right?
-Maa's Magic? -Yeah.
Bro, I can't even tell you how happy I am that Maa's Magic is back.
Forget me,
tons of voracious bachelors out there are happier than me!
Fingers crossed for your success, bro.
I have one request though.
Just don't dick us over this time around, please.
Okay. Take care, guys. See you.
You might be happy with how your company is performing.
But what about them?
I mean, Maa's Magic has become a part of their lives, bro.
In spite of busting their balls,
so many companies fail to win over customers.
And you can't sideline their happiness.
Don't grow for yourself,
but it's your responsibility to grow for them, Gaurav.
Why don't you do one thing?
Drop by the office tomorrow and meet my team.
Look, we're meeting a dozen companies anyway.
We'll meet one more. Big deal.
Adi...
I want to run the company on my terms now.
Honestly, I don't think anyone will be interested in my terms.
Just come over.
If things don't work out, we'll catch up over a cup of tea.
Okay?
All right.
I'll take your leave now,
and I'll see you tomorrow at 10:30 a.m. Okay?
Take care, buddy.
Do you really have to meet the investors?
He's a friend, Mom. I'll meet him.
It'll be on my terms.
If they agree, nothing like it,
or business is going great guns anyway.
By the way, did you speak to Devika?
What happened?
I think one of the important things
that we usually don't really understand
or pay attention to is the time slot.
I mean, we also have to go to the insights of anybody's...
Anybody's insights that we're working on and...
Insights being the most important thing,
we have to make sure
that we know what time we're posting because according...
Yeah. So, another thing is the duration.
We have to also know that it can't be...
I think you should take that.
I can't talk right now.
I need to talk to you now, Devika.
I'm in a meeting, Gaurav.
I'm at your office.
All okay?
I'm sorry, ma'am. Excuse me.
What's so urgent, Gaurav?
Devika, I'm really sorry, but there's something I need to know.
What do you mean?
Just two minutes, please.
I just want to know if you are still serious about me.
Look, we both know there was something between us.
Before we could confirm it, all this shit happened.
I didn't know how to deal with it.
But now things are getting settled.
Now...
I just want to know if you have feelings for me.
Yes or no.
By tomorrow.
By tomorrow?
Is there something important tomorrow, Gaurav?
I have a meeting with investors.
Either they will say yes or no.
But I want to know your answer before I get to know theirs.
It's just really important for me.
And why is it so important?
If you answer me after the meeting, I'll live the rest of my life in doubt
that you said yes
because I had become successful in society's eyes.
Or you said no
because I made no progress whatsoever.
Devika,
I don't want to live with any doubts.
Look, I'm really sorry for pushing you,
-but now-- -Can I go now?
Some nights seem like they'll never end,
while some dawns feel like they'll never arrive.
-Oye, wait up! -Come on!
-What's this? -Sweetened curd.
There's no need to worry.
What's the worst that could happen?
I know, Mom.
Don't worry about a thing.
Thank you.
-Love you. Bye. -All the best.
They'll be here shortly, sir. Thank you.
I gave us a lot of thought, Gaurav.
You are nothing like the guy I've wanted to spend
my whole life with.
Mr. Shukla.
We read your proposal very carefully.
Your proposal is the complete opposite
of the proposals we generally accept.
Do you know what the biggest problem is?
What will society say if I say yes to you?
Even if we were to accept your proposal,
we're not sure how our shareholders would react.
So, common sense says it's...
Too risky for us.
Yeah.
But then it got me thinking.
Until when will we treat relationships like jobs?
It should be safe and financially secure,
and must also have society's approval.
For how long?
But then,
we decided
to go with our gut feeling this time.
I feel
relationships should be like start-ups.
Where I, too, have an equal share.
Fifty-fifty.
We do everything together.
We laugh and cry together, we become successful together.
And if we fail,
then we fail together.
We, too, want your start-up to remain a start-up
and not become a job for you.
Gaurav, if I get stuck with the wrong job today,
then five years down the line, I'll still be questioning my decision.
So, we have taken a decision.
Gaurav Shukla...
I want to take this partnership forward with you.
I want to laugh with you
and bicker with you.
And 51% stake
will be yours.
I want to make all my life decisions with you,
be they big or small, right or wrong.
We would love to partner with you.
I want to spend my life with you, Gaurav.
Thank you so much, sir.
Thank you.
-Thank you so much, sir. -Congratulations again.
-Thank you. -I look forward to great things.
Yes, sir. Thank you.
-Thank you. -Thank you.
-Thanks. -Congratulations, buddy.
Thanks, buddy.
Roasted chickpeas for sale!
Buy roasted chickpeas...
When will you tell Mal?
He will find out on his own in a day or two.
I'm happy for you.
Thanks for believing in me.
-No, thanks to you. -For everything.
Mal, what's the timeline?
When will I get the prototype?
It should be ready within a week, sir.
-Sriram, prototype. -Yes, sir.
-Who's handling the back end? -I'm taking care of it, sir.
-What the hell! -What's the matter?
I think the company's yearly turnover
was wrongly credited to my account.
What!
Excuse me. I'll speak to the accountant and be right back.
Yes, I think there has been an error.
I just got a message.
What will you take to quit, man?
I'm happy with what I got, buddy.
-Anything else? -No.
-You guys! -Greetings.
-Greetings, ma'am. -Greetings.
-Hello. -Greetings.
What do we owe you?
Take it easy. There's no rush.
We're in a rush. Tell us.
Um, Rs. 3 lakh is pending from the company
and Rs. 535 for the tea.
-That's Rs. 3,00,535 in total. -Yes, that's right.
All right.
-It's correct then. -Hmm.
Here.
Check if the amount is correct.
I'm sure you must have filled in the correct amount.
I suggest that you check it. They never repay in full.
Right.
Hey...
you have given me...
This is a lot more!
So, your children can dream bigger.
If you don't mind, may I hug you guys?
Come here!
Whoa!
-Woo-hoo! -Whoa!
Woo-hoo!
Oops!
-Hi, Arjun. -Hello, Arjun.
Look what I got you.
-Chateau Lafite! -Ooh!
1865.
Rare.
Well, if you wish to pop and fucking pour, go ahead.
But in my opinion, I think you should try cheap liquor.
Cheap liquor has its own charm,
which that lacks.
Hmm?
-Arjun! -Oi!
-Bro! -Take your bloody Lafite with you!
Only Anu Aunty was left to deal with it.
What will you say?
Arjun got into Harvard Business School.
He'll earn in dollars now.
Off you go.
Even though she had lost the battle,
she remained just as arrogant as before.
-What's happening? Good to see you. -What's the plan for today?
Haven't quite decided anything yet. Let's see.
-What are you guys doing today? -Nothing.
-Do you remember what you have to say? -Yes.
Good morning, class.
-Good morning, Professor Elberse. -Good morning, Professor Elberse.
Today, we are privileged to have guest speakers
of a very successful start-up.
Pooja ma'am asked me to tell you
that we're teachers at the school you study in.
Class, please welcome the co-founders of Maa's Magic,
Gaurav Shukla and Sharad Malhotra, from India.
Dude!
-Welcome to Harvard. -Thank you, Professor Elberse.
-Welcome. -Thank you, Professor Elberse.
Please.
-Hey, guys. -Hello, everyone.
-Hi. -Hello.
You, blue shirt!
Why, man?
What's your name?
Arjun.
Pay attention, Arjun.
Yes, sir.
Class, today, we're here to talk about success.
How many of you think that we're successful?
Well, we don't give a fuck about what you think.
And that's what we're here to talk about.
There's only one person in this world
who should decide whether you're successful or not.
And that person is only you!